Title: And Baby Makes Three - Rubber Duckie, You're the One
Author: rainpuddle13
Email: rainpuddle13 [at] gmail.com
Rating: R, well, for a lot of things…
Pairing: Draco/Ginny
Length: 5,032
Summary: Toddler Liam makes an unfortunate discovery for his parents, at least.
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling,
various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. The title is shamelessly stolen from the Sesame Street song, "Rubber Duckie."
Notes: Thanks to nokomis305 for the beta as always. If you don't like the ficlet, blame cupid12203, dragonsangel68 and nokomis305 - it is entirely their fault for encouraging me.
And Baby Makes Three - Rubber Duckie, You're the One
"Draco, any time today!"
He admired his reflection in the full length mirror while ignoring his wife's shrill voice coming from downstairs, piles of discarded trousers and jumpers littered the floor around his feet. He couldn't decide between his comfortable faded jeans and a royal blue jumper or the gray trousers and deep emerald green jumper. It was imperative he look his best since there was a distinct possibility that his son would be so impossibly adorable that his grandparents couldn't resist taking as many pictures as possible, and he might be in a few or thirty of those pictures. He hadn't even thought about his hair.
"You're worse than any witch I know! I'm sure your hair looks fine!"
Draco felt that his wife should have known by now that he wasn't about to leave the house, even if it was just to go the Burrow for Sunday dinner, without everything on his person being in perfect order. They'd been together for just over five years now; it wasn't like this was something new he'd just sprung on her.
"I bet you don't even have Liam dressed yet!"
Of course Liam was dressed, that was the first thing he did before getting caught up in his own grooming routine. His son was dressed in the new outfit that Ginny had picked out (with his wholehearted approval) on a family outing the day before - soft navy blue and khaki plaid flannel trousers with a little navy jersey pullover with Snitches, Bludgers and Quaffles embroidered on the chest. The baby was dressed and sitting in the middle of the huge bed that dominated the master suite, playing with Gustav.
"Don't make me have to come up there!"
"I'm coming," he shouted back to her, finally deciding that he'd just have to go with the jeans and the jumper he had on before she got her nose any more out of shape. He gave his appearance one more glance before seeing to his son…
…who was no where to be seen.
"Liam?" he called softly, "where are you, monster?"
Gustav was lying, abandoned, on the bed with a rumpled trail where it looked like a little boy had made an escape on the far side. The beady little black eyes of the soft yellow stuffed toy seemed to follow him wherever he moved. It always gave him the creeps how the duck seemed to turn up in the most inconvenient places, namely his wife's side of the bed, at the oddest times, defying all explanations as to how he got there. Draco had long ago given up trying to convince Ginny that Gustav was out for his blood. She thought him mad, but one day, when it was too late, she'd see.
A giggle of sheer delight distracted his obsessing about his arch enemy and over to Ginny's side of the bed.
"What are you doing, son?" Draco asked as he rounded the bed to collect his wayward child. "We have to go before your Mummy... What in the blood hell have you gotten into?"
Liam smiled up at him, clapping his hands together, sending globs of purple sparkly stuff everywhere. The entire contents of Ginny's bedside table seemed to have been rifled through by the little boy.
Draco squatted and picked up a near empty phial, reading the elaborate label aloud. "Slickity Slick: A Warming… No," he groaned just as his son rubbed the thick, goopy substance over his face and head.
He avoided the little boy's outstretched hands as he retrieved his wand. Seven <i>Scourgifys</i> (two just on his hair alone) later and Liam was far from happy but at least presentable. He'd never realized just how messy the stuff was before now, but then again, he never had to try to remove it from anything.
"All right, your mother is going to kill me for taking forever," he told his son, haphazardly shoving the contents back into the drawer from whence it came, stopping to examine Bedknobs and Broomsticks: A Witch's Guide to Inanimate Love and The Wicked Wand and the Wanton Witch, the latter without pictures so it was of very little interest to him.
Liam made a lunge for the last bit of stuff he was putting away. "Duck!"
Sure enough, there was a yellow rubber duck mixed in with the phials, books and other odds and ends. "Gustav is on the bed."
"Duck!"
"You don't want this ugly thing do you?" Draco shoved the offending thing into the drawer. The toddler let loose a loud wail before dropping to the floor, tears flowing freely and his little face turning blood red. "All right, all right," he said, handing over the duck.
~*~
"It's about damn time," Ginny grumbled when Draco and Liam finally made it downstairs. "We were due ten minutes ago."
"Liam was being difficult," he replied, inspecting his son one more time for any incriminating evidence. "When did you get a rubber duck?"
"I don't have a rubber duck."
"Yes, you do. It's was in your drawer."
"Well, if I did, I've forgotten about it," she said, determinedly not looking him as she fussed with the colorful wrap that complimented her dress.
"It's…" Draco trailed off as he finally took in his wife's appearance. Ginny was wearing the chocolate brown dress she'd purchased the day before. It was long and formfitting, hugging every one of her delectable curves in a way that made his knees weak and his mouth water. Now he knew why she hadn't let him see it on her whilst they were at the store: he would have tried to ravish her on the spot.
"What's the matter, Draco?" she purred, a slow, sultry smile spread across her lips. "Cat got your tongue?"
It was difficult to think straight when she talked to him like that. The only coherent thought he could manage was focused on the fact that she could not possibly be wearing any knickers. "Uhm," was all that he could manage.
She stepped close to him, her breasts brushing ever so lightly against his arm as she leaned up to give him a soft kiss before taking the baby. He watched her backside intently as she fussed over Liam, making sure his outfit was on properly and wrapping him in a warm blanket.
"I think you're trying to kill me," he said, finally finding his voice.
"What makes you say that?"
"That dress."
"Oh, you like my new dress?"
"The only way I'd like it more is if it was on the floor."
Ginny's eyes twinkled. "I might be able to arrange that a little later."
"And the fact you're not wearing knickers." His knees buckled slightly at just the thought.
"Who says I'm not?"
"There is no way with that dress."
"Think itty bitty, black and lace."
"Black lace," Draco mumbled in an awed voice as his mind zeroed in on the exact pair of barely-there knickers she was talking about.
"Your favorites, if I'm not mistaken."
"I'm dead."
She pulled the hood on Liam's cloak up over his head before giving her husband a very devious smirk. "I certainly hope not, Draco. You're no good to me dead."
She Disapparated with a very faint pop before he could respond.
~*~
Ginny reappeared on the front steps of her childhood home within seconds, immediately checking to make sure her son was still in one piece. No matter how many times she'd Side-Along Apparated with Liam in her arms there was always that small niggling fear that she would splinch him.
She took a quick glance around to make sure none of her family was about and Draco hadn't followed her immediately. After her performance back at home, she was sure he would have to take a bit of time to collect himself before putting in his appearance.
"Hey, baby," she cooed, giving Liam the kisses he demanded before digging about in the changing bag for Gustav.
He proudly showed up his new prized possession, a yellow rubber duck. "Duck."
"Yes, it's a duck," she sighed, reaching for the toy. "Can Mummy have the duck, darling?"
Liam shook his head and hugged the toy closely. "No!"
"Please?"
"No!"
Her husband was going to be one dead wizard when they got back home! What was he thinking, allowing their son to rummage through her things without supervision? This would have never happened if he hadn't insisted on being a hands-on (well, as hands-on as Draco Malfoy dared to be) father. She could just scream.
"Mummy will let you have a lolly if you give her the duck?" Ginny knew it was wrong to bribe her baby, but desperate times called for desperate measures and Liam had just discovered the joys of sweets (thanks to her darling husband).
He appeared to consider the proposition for all of half a second before giving the duck a sloppy kiss.
"How about Puffy?" She dangled a colorful stuffed dragon in front of him. "Don't you want to play with him? See how soft and squishy he is? He's much nicer than that duck."
Liam didn't seem at all interested in any of the toys that she could find in the bag. "Gustav is going to be so jealous when he finds out you're cheating him on, baby."
And just where was that damned stuffed duck anyway? Probably on my bed, she thought. That was where Gustav was almost always found anytime he was thought to be lost, which led Draco to joke that the duck was in love with her and trying to off him.
"Ginny, dear," her mother called from the doorway, "what are you doing out there in the cold? Come on in this house. Where's Draco? Let me see my darling grandson."
She had no choice now but to hand over the baby who promptly showed his prized possession to his grandmother. "Oh, don't go showing that to your grandfather, my little sweet pea, you might not get it back."
"Draco will be along in a few minutes," Ginny said, gathering up her things and hoping her mother hadn't heard her groan. "Something came up at the last minute that he had to take care of before he left the house."
"Ah, good, I fixed his favorite."
"He'll appreciate that."
Molly stopped just inside the doorway. "Ginny, what is this sparkly purple stuff in Liam's hair?"
~*~
After a few awkward moments after Draco's arrival, the visit settled into the usual comfortable routine that all afternoons spent at the Burrow managed to take on. The men retired to the garden with the older boys for a pick up game of Quidditch while the women puttered about the house, caring for the younger children and seeing to preparation of the evening meal.
Liam had spent a good deal of time showing off his yellow rubber duck to anyone would pay him heed. Ginny waited with bated breath as her father thoroughly examined the toy while explaining everything he knew on the subject to his wide-eyed grandson. She was relieved when Draco's entrance provided a much needed distraction for everyone.
"I didn't appreciate the way you left me earlier," Draco hissed as he pressed Ginny up against the shelves in the little out of the way cupboard with a low ceiling. He'd been lying in wait for her ever since returning to the house after the match. Her trip to the back storage room for more chairs for the children's table presented the most perfect opportunity.
She pressed her long body against his, teasingly. "So what are you going to do about it?"
His hands slid over the gentle rounding of her derriere, pulling her forcibly close to him as he ground against her so she could feel his growing desire.
"Draco, not now. I'm going to be missed. Dinner…"
"Isn't for another hour at least. We've plenty of time."
"Draco," she pleaded softly. She should have suspected what he'd wanted.
His lips blazed a trail of fire up her neck, stopping to whisper in her ear, "I love it when you say my name like that."
Ginny shuddered against him. "Oh, Draco."
"That's more like it, witch."
"We can't."
He nipped lightly at her earlobe. "Shhh, we can."
"Most of my family is in the next room."
"Then you'll have to make it a point to be quiet." He punctuated the last word by nipping the tender place on her shoulder.
Ginny bit her lip to keep from moaning too loudly as a searing heat settled in the pit of her belly, her knickers becoming instantly wet. She'd never been very successful in denying him anything, especially when he was being so determined.
"I don't think I can," she whimpered.
He was busily working the hem of her dress up her thighs. "Yes, you can."
"Why are you doing this?"
"Punishment." He plundered her mouth then, demanding her complete and utter surrender to him.
"Punishment?" she asked breathlessly.
A chuckle rumbled low in his chest. "For leaving me in dire straits earlier."
"I'm very sorry about that."
"Sorry doesn't cut it," he growled, wedging his knee between her thighs. "Swear you won't do it again."
She could only stare up at him with lust glazed eyes and nod.
"Say it," he prompted.
"I swear," she said obediently, her hands reaching for his belt. She really did hate that she'd left him in such a distasteful state earlier. "Let me make it up to you," she purred, throwing caution to the wind.
He closed his eyes as he nuzzled his face between her breasts, allowing her to shove him back against the shelves on the far wall. She kissed him once, gently, before sliding down his front to her knees before him, her hands frantically working to undo his trousers. He quivered in anticipation as an immense relief flooded over him as she freed his straining erection from its confines. Ginny gave him a wicked grin, her pink tongue darting out to moisten her lips as her hand wrapped firmly around the base of his hardness. Draco had to grab ahold of a shelf to keep from collapsing on the floor as his knees gave away.
"Ginny!" Ron bellowed from somewhere alarmingly close to the cupboard door. "Malfoy! There seems to be something wrong with Liam's duck! It's… It's… It seems to be… I don't know!"
"Oh my god," Ginny whispered hurriedly, standing up so quickly that she hit her head on a low shelf. The mismatched china clattered and threatened to come tumbling down in a loud crash.
"Gin," Draco whimpered, "please!"
She tried to put herself to rights again, giving up after several failed attempts to do something with her messy hair all the while ignoring her desperate, pleading husband. "I have to! Liam!"
He'd just pulled up his zipper as his wife flung open the small door and they almost tumbled over the last person he wanted to see in the tiny hidden alcove nestled between kitchen and the narrow sitting room. During the best of times, he always needed a few minutes to prepare himself to deal with Ginny's youngest brother, but now, in this state, he couldn't responsible for his actions.
"Where have you two been?" Ron used his best Auror interrogating voice to ask the question.
Pansy snickered as she joined the group from the kitchen, looping her arms around her mate. "Now, Ronnikins, you know they've been off for a bit of how's your father."
"I did not need to know that!"
Charlie patted his baby brother on the back on the way through to the sitting room to join his wife, Isolde, on the settee by the window. "That'll teach you to ask questions you really don't want to know the answers to."
"That's right, Ronnikins," Draco drawled, getting his dander up, "mind your own fucking business."
Ron glared menacingly at him, his shoulders hunching up. "That is my sister!"
"Draco, mind your language please," Isolde implored, "there are children in here and we can hear every word you say!"
He had to stop and swallow the remark he'd intended to lay on his wanker-in-law. "And she's my wife now and I can do what I want with her!"
"Just whip them out now and get it over with," Ginny hissed as she pushed past her husband and brother into the sitting room. She was having a difficult time maintaining what was left of her shredded dignity as it was without having to deal with their childish posturing. "Where's my baby?"
"He's in the sitting room," Pansy said, pushing a spluttering Ron out of way so the other witch had a clear path.
Ginny stopped dead in her tracks. There was her son, lying on his back, in the middle of the floor in her parent's sitting room, the little yellow rubber duck perched precariously on his chest. The sound of his delighted giggles warbled strangely with the strong vibrations from the undulating toy.
"Oh, Liam," she uttered, cursing her baby's father under her breath as she tried to assess the situation.
"That's my boy!" Draco said; the pride unmistakable in his voice as he joined his wife, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her flush against him so she wouldn't forget about their unfinished business. He'd given up on straightening his clothes to gaze adoringly at his precious tiny son along with everyone else in the room. "Liam's first sign of magic! This has to be some sort of record! Fifteen months!"
"Uh, actually," Percy said, clearing his throat to get everyone's attention. No one had noticed him lurking about the front entryway in all the commotion. He and Penelope had just arrived with their small son. "Christopher's first sign came at thirteen months and the earliest documented case was-"
"Shut up, Percy," Fred said from far the corner of the room where he and his brother occupied a pair of chairs.
"No one cares," George finished with a flourish.
"Naturally, he'll be good at everything," Draco rattled on excitedly, paying his brother-in-laws no heed, "but he'll be exceptional at Potions like me. I'm sure that he'll inherit his mum's ability to throw a wicked hex when the occasion arises."
Ginny couldn't stand it anymore as she watched the twins, with heads bowed, occasionally laughing and pointing. She didn't even want to begin to fathom what was going through those two's mind. All she knew was she had to put a stop to it immediately. "Draco!"
"And he'll be smashing at Quidditch just like his father! And Prefect, and then Head Boy!"
"Draco!"
He refused to look at his wife. She was not going to ruin his moment of glory as a proud father, damn it. This was his one chance to show up his wife's brothers who were always going on and on and on and on about their redheaded brats.
"Draco," Ginny said more firmly, freeing herself from his embrace and putting her hand on his arm to force him to look at her. She had to stop him before he said another word.
"What?" He glowered at her for breaking his train of thought. She gave him the look that was supposed to silently communicate whatever was so important she had to interrupt him, but he'd given up ages ago trying to figure it out.
"Just stop, please."
"Why?"
"Because it's not nice to show up others."
He snorted. "And when has that ever stopped your brothers?"
"But you're a Malfoy."
"And my son has done something rather amazing." He was in severe danger of beaming if he kept this up much longer.
"But he hasn't," she said quietly.
"What do you mean?"
"Liam hasn't done anything special."
"He has!" He gestured towards his son, who looked to be enjoying himself entirely too much with the duck. "He made the toy move on his own."
"Draco, that's no ordinary duck."
"It's a magical duck, used to encourage children's magic?" His blond eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
Ginny shook her head slowly, pulling him to her so his ear was near her lips. It was then, and only then, that she dared give voice to the evil-that-shall-not-be-named that had seduced her unwitting son into a quivering, giggling, delighted mess in the middle of her parent's sitting room floor.
"No," Draco gasped, clearly not wanting to believe what he just heard from his wife's lips.
"I'm afraid so." She stared directly at Hermione who was sitting in the overstuffed floral chair nearest the fireplace, and was looking decidedly like a cornered rabbit.
Liam chose this very moment to pull on his father's trouser leg to get his attention, holding up the now still duck once he had it. "Duck," he said, pleading with his luminous blue-gray eyes for his father to make it do its thing again.
"No more duck for you," Draco snarled, snatching the offending toy from his hand.
"Draco, don't be so mean," Ginny chastised as she picked up her very shocked toddler, snuggling him and patting his back soothingly. She could feel his little body stiffing as he worked himself up into what was shaping up to be a temper tantrum of legendary proportions. If Liam was not happy, then no one else was going to be allowed to be happy.
"I don't care!"
"He doesn't know any better."
Draco attempted to tear the smiling head off the duck, but instead of pulling it off, he managed to turn on the powerful little motor hidden within the body, causing the whole thing to agitate in his hands. "What the-"
Liam's head snapped around at the sound of the gentle hum, a huge silly grin showed off a half mouth full of baby teeth. He reached out with both hands. "Mine!"
It was all Ginny could do not to drop him as he struggled to get his hands back on the little yellow duck. "Just give it to him."
"No!"
"I wonder if Gustav knows little Liam there is cheating on him with a Muggle?" George pondered aloud.
Fred shrugged. "I'd hate to be the one to break it to him, mate! Evil one that duck, or at least Malfoy says he is!"
"Draco," she warned again, this time more forcefully.
He handed over the vibrating duck, but not without a fair amount of grousing under his breath. He really detested being shown up by his wife, especially in front her brothers. Liam slithered down to the floor once he'd obtained his prize, his eyes going wide when hugged it tight, getting an unexpected surprise and squealing his delight. Draco never imagined a small child could make that sort of noise, let alone it being his own child.
"H-h-how could you?" he spluttered, finding himself unable to articulate anything more coherent. In lieu of words, he pinned Hermione with a death glare to end all death glares.
"It was meant to be a joke," she cried in defense.
"Oooh! Didn't see that coming," the twins commentated in tandem.
Draco glared at her. "Well, it's not so funny now is it?"
"No, not so much."
"My child is disturbingly attached to a sex toy thanks to you! And a Muggle one at that!"
"Gone south already, dear?" Molly asked; concern evident in her voice as she bustled in from the kitchen. Angelina and Katie followed close on her heels. "Having to resort to Muggle gadgets? Sometimes it takes a while to set things to rights after having a baby."
"Mother," she moaned, casting about for the nearest unoccupied piece of furniture, but find none, she opted for burying her face in her hands as she turned an impossible shade of red.
"There's no shame in it, sweetheart. We all need a bit of spice from time to time," her mother continued on, completely unflustered, as two of her four sister-in-laws sniggered behind her. "You just have to keep curious babies out of your cupboards."
Arthur looked up from the Evening Prophet he'd been hiding behind while sitting on the sofa in the middle of all the action. He'd always found it best to allow Molly to deal with the family when they got like this, but this time his curiosity got the best of him. "That's quite an odd use for a rubber duck, isn't it? I thought they were Muggle children bath toys…"
"Please, just stop." Ginny didn't know how she would ever be able to show her face at the Burrow again.
Fred snickered. "Sunday dinner at Mum's is the best!"
"Couldn't pay for this kind of entertainment," George agreed wholeheartedly, sliding up on the edge of his seat to get a better vantage point.
"You find this amusing, do you?" Draco asked, his voice dripping with venom as he turned to face his most worrisome brothers-in-law.
"No, no, not at all," the twins said in unison, knowing innately from years of trial and error when it was time to back down.
"That is what I thought." He scowled at the snickering Pansy who didn't even have the common decency to hide her mirth as she strode into the center of the room. "What's the matter with you?"
She smiled broadly. "Not a thing."
"This is all your fault! He wouldn't even like ducks if it wasn't for you!"
Pansy picked up her godson, accepted his enthusiastic kisses and admiring his new favorite toy. "Whatever helps you sleep at night."
Ron managed to shake off the catatonic stupor he'd been in since discovering his sister and brother-in-law in the cupboard, joining most of the family in the sitting room and finally catching up to the conversation. "Mother, how do you know about vibrating rubber ducks?"
"What did I tell you about asking questions you really don't want to know the answers to," Charlie uttered, totally mortified by his baby brother's lack of tack. He definitely wanted to remove himself from the vicinity of any answer their mother could formula because no matter what it was, it was going to be way more information than he ever cared to know. "Ron, why don't we go put away the Quidditch kit before supper!"
"I didn't know about the duck," she shouted after her two retreating sons, "but I do find the idea of it interesting!"
Ginny was nudged forward by a very traitorous Pansy and her not-so-subtle husband. She glanced around the room, trying to capture the attention of one of her remaining relatives, but everyone was looking decidedly elsewhere. "Mum, how long before the roast and pudding is ready? I'm rather hungry."
"Oh, yes, the roast. I nearly forgot in all the excitement. I suppose you and Draco have worked up quite an appetite this afternoon," Molly said with a wink, patting her daughter on the arm on her way back to the kitchen. "What with all the grandbaby making going on in my cupboard."
~*~
Ginny was really surprised that the rest of the afternoon at the Burrow had been rather uneventful, but she attributed that to everyone (other than her mother that is) was afraid to open their mouths. She never knew that the weather and Quidditch statistics could make such interesting (and long and boring) dinner conversation.
But that was all over with now, she was home.
She'd had a long, hot soak in a tub full of rose scented bubbles and a glass of wine to calm her nerves. Comfortably ensconced in her bed, Ginny enjoyed a second glass of wine while reading her trashy romance novel and waiting for her husband to return from putting the baby down for the night. He'd insisted on doing the nightly task, probably because Liam was exhausted and would go down without much of fight. Lazy, she thought mutinously.
"Good evening, Mrs. Malfoy," Draco said, slipping into their bedroom and looking like a cat who'd caught the canary. He'd changed into his favorite forest green silk pyjama trousers while she had been in the bath.
"Evening," she said warily. "Liam didn't give you much trouble did he?"
"Nope. Out like a snuffed candle."
"That's good."
"Yes, yes, it is." It wasn't until he sat down on the edge of the bed that she noticed he was hiding something behind his back.
She took another sip of wine, regarding her husband, trying to figure out what he was up to. "He's a good baby."
"Only when he's asleep," Draco said cheekily.
"What are you playing at?" she asked, unable to stand it any longer.
He grinned nefariously then, showing her the little yellow rubber duck that had enthralled her son for the better part of the day. "Lookie what I have."
"How on earth?"
"I had to pry it out of his hand after he fell asleep."
"Oh, don't you think he'll miss it?"
"Nah. So, do you want to want to give it a go?"
"Draco!" she cried, thoroughly scandalized by his suggestion, but intrigued nonetheless.
"C'mon, Gin Gin."
"I didn't think you'd lower yourself to use something so Muggle."
"Normally, I wouldn't, but we have it and might as well put it to good use," he said.
"You've put some thought into this I see," she responded in semi-disbelief.
"Been thinking about it since I found out what it was."
"Oh."
"So, what do you say?"
"That Gustav would be awfully jealous."
"The hell with that duck!"
"Awwah, Draco, are you jealous of a little old stuffed animal?"
"Damn right I am! I swear that duck is out to get me so he can have his dirty way with you!"
She shook her head, not believing they were having this conversation again. It never ceased to amaze her just how vehemently his hatred was for Liam's favorite toy. "It's just a bit of material and stuffing for Merlin's sake."
"That's what he wants you to think!"
"All right then, let's make Gustav one very jealous duck then." She downed the rest of her wine and put her book away.
Neither of them saw the little yellow duck named Gustav that she'd knocked off the nightstand in her haste.
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