AN- Here it is people! The next chapter! Betcha you're excited!
Okay I'm done being weird…
H/H FOREVER!
Bye!
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It was a very reluctant and only half-awake Harry that made his way down to the common room that morning. It wasn't just his sleepiness that made him reluctant to leave his bed that morning either. Today was the day that Ron and Hermione had decided Harry was to tell them all about his life before they had met him giving him no say in the matter what so ever.
It's not that he didn't want to talk to his friends, just that he didn't want to talk to them about himself. Everywhere he went in the wizarding world he was treated like a celebrity. People he'd never even met before had swarmed him in a pub and seemed to know more about his past than Harry did. When he had finally gotten to Hogwarts people had still treated him as if he was something… more. Harry had to admit, though begrudgingly, that he had somehow done something that no other person had, he had survived "Avada Kedavra", the so-called "Killing Curse." Everyone thought that there was something special about him that had allowed him to survive it, but what if there wasn't? What if it had simply been some sort of accident, or an odd reflection of magic due to the alignment of the planets, or something equally esoteric? According to Hagrid his parents had been powerful wizards in their own right and it had been suggested that it was perhaps their magic that had saved him. Harry honestly believed himself to be just a normal child, yet still everyone looked up to him as the hero, a figurehead for the fight against Dark Wizards. As if, because he survived the killing curse, he must be special in some mysterious way. Harry didn't think so. He couldn't even remember what had happened, but he had obviously been too young at the time to do anything like defeat the most powerful dark wizard ever on purpose.
Most people would have liked the attention, but then most people hadn't grown up the way Harry had. All his life (at least all that he could remember) he'd never had anything of his own, only hand-me-downs from his enormous cousin for clothes and only as much food as he required to live. Only his thoughts and feelings had ever been truly his and so he was loath to let anyone see either and after years of living with the Dursleys his feelings had become more and more muted, a sort of unconscious defence against their cruelty leaving him with only his thoughts.
On the other hand though, Ron and Hermione were certainly friends and, although he didn't know it yet, Harry was beginning to learn that some people could be trusted and Ron and Hermione were two of those people.
So it was with mixed feelings that he sat down in front of his two friends in the empty common room to begin his 'interrogation'.
Harry sat down on the couch that faced the fireplace while Hermione used a levitation charm to move an armchair over to face him and Ron just carried one over.
"Alright, Harry, here's what you're going to do." Hermione started in gentle, but firm voice once she had curled up in her seat. "We're going to ask you questions and you will answer them. Simple enough?"
"Yes, Ma'am." Harry said mockingly.
"Okay. First off.' Ron said, leaning towards Harry. "We've told you all about our homes, so now you're going to tell us about your home."
Harry though for a moment. Privet Drive might be where he had lived for the last ten years, but it certainly wasn't his home, but if it wasn't his home… Harry smirked.
"My home? Well, my home is a hidden castle, with a surprisingly large population of in training witches and wizards…" Harry began.
Hermione narrowed her eyes at him, quite obviously not amused.
"Hogwarts is not your home, Harry. It's just where you're living right now.' Hermione said angrily with the air of a child stomping their foot. "You promised us that you would answer our questions or give us a reason why not."
"By 'home' we mean…" Ron started, trying to find a suitable description. "Well I don't know who said it but 'Your home is where your heart is.' That's what we mean by home."
Harry sighed and decided he wasn't going to be able to joke his way out of this.
<I may as well just tell them whatever they want, straight out.> Harry thought. <Otherwise this could take all day.>
"I understood exactly what you meant, but by your own definition Hogwarts is my home. Privet Drive is just where I lived for the last ten years."
Ron and Hermione looked at each other, looking quite obviously confused.
"But… How… But - that's where your family is. At least your relatives, and all of your childhood memories must take place there. How can you not consider it your home?" asked Ron, frowning.
"Please!" Harry snorted. "I'd rather not be reminded that I'm related to them. As for childhood memories? Well of course they all take place in and around Privet Drive. So what? How does that make it my home?"
Ron rolled his eyes as if Harry was a complete imbecile.
"Home is where your heart is right?" Hermione asked and Harry nodded his agreement. "Well all of your good memories are a part of your heart, so then it makes sense that your heart would be wherever those memories took place." Hermione looked quite pleased with her explanation.
"I guess," Harry shrugged, "but then, I don't really have any good memories of Privet Drive."
Ron looked appalled at the statement and Hermione suddenly looked as if she might start crying at any moment. (AN- Why do girls change emotions so rapidly?)
"Okay," Ron said while he rubbed his forehead. "I think we need a new approach."
Now it was Harry's turn to be confused. He couldn't for the life of him understand the reaction of his two best friends. He didn't get a chance to ponder their reactions before Ron asked another question.
"You said you didn't want to be reminded that you're related to - well, to your relatives. Why not?"
Harry wrinkled his nose in mild disgust.
"Because," he said, sounding as if he thought he was stating the obvious "they're ignorant, rude, obnoxious, intolerant, narrow minded, lazy, nosy, cruel, hypocritical fools-" he frowned, continuing through clenched teeth, his voice expressing a tightly controlled rage. "They don't deserve to be related to my mother at all. Whether by blood or marriage."
Ron and Hermione jerked back in shock at the seething anger in Harry's voice. They had known that Harry wasn't as close with his relatives as Ron and Hermione were with their own families, but they hadn't expected to hear anything even close to what they had just been told, and Harry wasn't finished yet.
"You know," he said seeming to be just figuring something out, "I think I actually hate them…"
Both Ron and Hermione spluttered for a while at this statement before Hermione finally recovered enough to ask-
"But - why?"
And Ron asked, "How could you hate your family?" right after.
Harry sighed.
"Well, you said you wanted to know everything, right?"
Hermione nodded, as did Ron a moment later.
"To tell you the truth, they've been absolute jerks for as long as I've lived with them, and that's putting it mildly. I didn't really realize it though, until I'd been here at Hogwarts for a while. I mean I'd never really lived any other way so I didn't really have any way to see that." He paused, suddenly finding himself embarrassed that he'd never noticed how poor his treatment was.
Ron was starting to look mad now, but Hermione asked him to explain.
"Well, for example there are four rooms in the house. One where Dudley sleeps, one where he keeps his toys, one where my - my Aunt and Uncle sleep and one guest room."
"Then where do you sleep?" Ron blurted out, then clapped a hand to his mouth motioning to continue with his other.
"Well," Harry paused, not sure how to explain. "There's this room under the stairs - well, it's not a room really, it's a cupboard - but it's big enough that a cot fits in it, so that's where I sleep."
Ron apparently had no idea what a cot was, but Hermione knew and from the look on her face she wasn't what Harry would call 'happy' to hear about Harry's sleeping arrangements.
"Well that's certainly a good reason to hate them." Hermione growled. "I assume there's more though."
Harry nodded and went on.
"Before I go on, I just want you both to know that I wouldn't have put up with any of it if I'd had any idea that I shouldn't have had to." He said, still feeling a little embarrassed.
"Harry, there's no need to be embarrassed that you never did anything about your life." Ron said. "You're not weak or anything because of how the Dursleys treated you. You didn't let them treat you badly, because as far as you knew they weren't treating you badly."
Harry smiled thankfully at his friend, amazed at how Ron could seem insensitive most of the time, but always seemed to say the right thing when it really mattered.
"Well, let's see now. Reasons why I hate the Dursleys… Well for one, they hate me for being a wizard. They hate anything magical or different. They yell at me if I ask any question, especially about my parents. They actually told me that my parents had died in a car crash and that I got my scar in that same crash. In fact they never told me anything other than that about my parents, so I never knew that my mum was a witch and my dad was a wizard and that I was one as well. They give Dudley anything he wants while I'm lucky if I get one of his shirts before it's worn out. All the clothes I own, other than my school robes, are hand-me-downs from Dudley. The Dursleys said I was lucky to get even that much, because, after all, they didn't ask to be forced to "look after me"…" Harry paused and took a calming breath. "Look, there's more, but I could probably go on all day about it and I think that you wanted to know more about me, not just why I don't like the Dursleys."
By this point both Ron and Hermione were clenching their fists and breathing deeply to keep themselves under control.
"Alright," Hermione said once she was calm enough to speak. "We can talk about this later. For now just tell us what you used to do before you met us. Like at school and stuff. Your pastimes."
Harry rolled his eyes. He really didn't want to talk about why he didn't like the Dursleys. It made him feel like he was just whining and complaining, which he hated. After all, whine and complain all you want, but nothing will change until you shut up and do something about it.
"Well at school I mostly just did my work. Dudley and his friends made sure that no one would talk to me and I didn't really mind too much since I was used to it from living at Privet Drive, so I never really tried to get to know anyone. When I was little I was offered free martial arts lessons, which I accepted of course, and for the most part I spent most of my time either at the dojo or in the local library. Other than that my life up until I got my Hogwarts letter was pretty dull. Just going to school, going to the library and dojo, doing chores and staying away from the Dursleys as much as I could was pretty much all I did." Harry let out a breath. " So I guess that's about all there is to say. Can I go back to bed now?"
"Harry, I'm really sorry that you had to grow up like that." Ron said looking profoundly sad. "No one should have to live like that…"
Hermione to looked terribly sad, as if she wanted to cry. Suddenly she got up and went over to Harry. Then before anyone could say anything she sat on the couch facing him and threw her arms around him and hiding her face on his shoulder.
"Harry, why didn't you tell us?" she asked, sounding a little squeaky. "We can't make up for what you went through, but we could've done something to help you feel better."
Only having ever seen such affection shown to Dudley, Harry was quite shocked. Nonetheless he put his arms around her in what he hoped was a comforting manner, after giving Ron a surprised look.
"Hermione, I told you. I never realized that anything I'd experienced was bad, so there really wasn't anything to tell you for a while. Once I realized though that my life basically sucked, I had already been here at Hogwarts for a while, where my life really doesn't suck. You couldn't have helped me feel 'better' because I didn't feel bad about it in the first place. I still don't. It's like getting a cut and not realizing it until after it's healed. If you don't notice anything is hurting you until after the pain is gone then there's isn't anything you can do about it and it doesn't really matter because if you never felt the pain then it may as well have never happened.' Harry explained with the air of someone who had just stated that one plus one was two. "Besides, what more could you do other than being my friends? What more could I even want?"
Ron looked as if he wanted to disagree, but just shook his head. Hermione's shaky breaths steadied and she let go of Harry. A moment later Harry realized he should also let go and Hermione settled down to sit by him on the couch.
"Alright, Harry, if you say so, but you know we'll always listen if you ever want to talk to either of us about it." Ron said.
"Alright, Ron, I'll remember." Harry answered. "Now can I go back to bed?" he asked starting to get up.
"No, not yet." Hermione said trying to sound light hearted and brush away the gloominess that seemed to have settled over everyone but Harry. "You haven't told us anything about what accidental magic you did as a child."
"Yeah, Harry." Said Ron jovially. "I told you about the time I got covered in rat spleens in Diagon Alley. You must have some equally embarrassing story. I need to have something to blackmail you with so you can't use that story against me."
"Rat spleens?" Hermione asked. "What does that have to do with accidental magic?"
"Uhhh…" Ron blushed. "Well, I was in the apothecary with my family, we were getting Percy's school supplies, and the twins told me that the owner had a bunch of chocolate frogs in the jar. I believed them because I couldn't actually see inside it. It was too high up for me to reach and I ended up doing a bit of accidental magic, which made the jar fall off its shelf. Unfortunately it was too heavy for me to catch and I ended up spilling it all over myself. Let me tell you, it's just about impossible to get the smell off of you."
Hermione looked at Ron for a moment in silence, then burst into uncontrollable laughter at the thought of a young Ron covered in fresh rat spleens and looking surprised.
Harry smiled slightly himself and Ron tried to look indignant at Hermione's laughter, but he soon joined her, smiling at the memory.
"Alright, Harry," she said when she calmed down. "Spill it. What kinds of magic did you do when you were a kid?"
"Hmmm, well it's hard to think of them all." Harry said. "I mean I never really even thought much about it until Hagrid came to take me to Hogwarts and I found out that I'm a wizard."
Harry thought about it for a moment before coming up with some occurrences that he was pretty sure had to have been caused by accidental magic.
"Well, there was this one time when Dudley and his friends were chasing me at school. I was running away from them, but I got stuck in a dead-end between the side of the school and some fencing. Then all of the sudden I was on the other side of the fence even though I hadn't moved at all."
Ron frowned and asked how old Harry had been at the time.
"Ummm- I think I was around four or five at the time. Why?"
"Nothing, I was just wondering." Ron answered, but his frown didn't go away. "Keep going, what else did you do?"
"When I was about six, Dudley's aunt Marge brought her dog to the house and it started chasing me as soon as it got out of the car. Fortunately Marge really spoils it so it wasn't very fast, otherwise it would have got me right away. But anyway, I ran away (obviously) and tried to climb a tree in the back yard before it could reach me and when I got to the tree I jumped up to try and get hold of the first branch. I didn't even come close the first try but then I heard the Dursleys laughing at me just as the dog tried to jump on me." Harry let himself smirk at the memory of what happened next. "Instead of jumping on me though, it jumped through me. It smacked its nose on the tree and I swear it had a confused look on its face." He grinned. "It would have been so much funnier if I hadn't gotten in so much trouble for it."
Hermione shook her head, laughing and not feeling the least bit sorry for the dog.
Ron, however, was frowning.
"I didn't think it was possible for a wizard to do something like that..." he muttered to himself.
Harry looked at him weirdly.
"What do you mean? I know what happened, and since it happened it's obviously possible!"
"Huh." Ron said. "I guess so. I must just be thinking of something else..." but he didn't look too sure of himself. "Are you sure the dog went through you?"
"Yes, Ron, I am quite sure. I may not always tell the truth, but I never tell a lie." (**AN- check the AN at the bottom if you don't understand this.)
"Well go on then." Ron said. "Can you think of any other times you did accidental magic?"
"Of course I can." Harry answered. "I must've done it a hundred times while I was living with the Dursleys. Although…" Harry paused in thought. "From what I can remember I started doing it a lot more after Osakawa sensei started teaching me."
"Who's "Osakawa"?" inquired Hermione. "And what was this person teaching you?"
"Sensei?" Ron asked at the same time.
"Oh, sensei sort of means the same thing as 'Professor', and he teaches me martial arts." Answered Harry.
Ron only looked more confused than before, but Hermione nodded in understanding.
"Okay, I got the part about him teaching you 'martial arts'," Ron stated, scratching his head, "but what are martial arts?"
"Oh, honestly!" Huffed Hermione. "Does everyone from a wizarding family know nothing about muggle culture? Martial arts are basically different forms of fighting, or hand-to-hand or unarmed combat, such as Judo or Karate. Although they are generally studied for the purpose of defending yourself and others or stopping a fight."
Ron rolled his eyes at her, but he was smiling anyway.
"Anyway, Harry, you said you started doing even more accidental magic?" Ron asked seriously.
"Yeah, I don't know why though. I suppose it's just a coincidence." Harry replied casually. "My magic must just have started growing then."
Ron bit his lip, obviously thinking hard about something. Harry and Hermione shared a look. Ron was almost never serious, so when he did get serious about something you could bet that it was… well - serious.
"Hey, what's up?" Harry asked his friend cautiously.
Ron asked another question instead of answering.
"How many times can you remember doing accidental magic?"
"Ron, I honestly couldn't tell you." Harry said. "Around a hundred times though, in all ten years I was at the Dursleys. Now, what is up?"
The look on their friend's face was beginning to worry both Harry and Hermione.
"Probably nothing." Ron mumbled to the two facing him and continued frowning as he was deep in thought about whatever he was talking about.
By this point Hermione looked ready to strangle him.
"Well I certainly hope it's nothing." She said through clenched teeth. "Of course I can't be sure it's nothing unless you tell us what the heck you're talking about!"
Hermione's tone brought Ron out of his thoughts and back to reality.
"Uh - well, most magical kids only do accidental magic a few times before they get their wand." Ron explained. "It's definitely weird if you've done it a hundred times, Harry."
Hermione started to look worried again.
"Hmmm. We should really tell a professor about this -" she started, but Harry cut her off.
"Ugh!" he groaned. "No way are we telling anyone about it. It would just be another thing for people to annoy me about! The whole Boy-Who-Lived thing is annoying enough on its own! I don't need something else for people to talk about!"
"But, Harry! There might be something wrong!" Hermione scolded him.
"Hermione, if nothing bad has happened because of it for ten years then the chances that something is wrong are pretty slim, aren't they?" argued Ron. "Just leave it alone. Besides, it's not really a big deal. It could even be something as simple as Harry's magic reacting to his scar."
"Well, I suppose." She agreed reluctantly. "It would make sense. After all, I read that a person's magic always works to heal any magical injury on it's own. In fact that's what most medical magic is based on, and-"
"OK!" Ron interrupted. "I think we get it. We don't need a whole lecture!"
Harry smiled as Hermione's face flushed. These times were the memories he needed. Simple fun, teasing friends and no one to tell him what a freak he was.
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AN- Alright- go ahead and shoot me. I know it's been WAY too long since I updated, but on the plus side I've got the next chapter almost finished already, and the moment I think it's good enough to be posted, I will do so.
Why did this take sooooooo long? Because I wanted to do a really good job on this chapter and I ended up writing the entire thing about seven or eight times- believe it or not, I'm still not happy with it.
IMPORTANT: I need advice! I really don't think my writing is going too well. I feel like the story is flopping around from one thing to another without any flow. I also think that I'm focusing too much on the wrong things. PLEASE help me if you think you can!
**I may not always tell the truth, but I never tell a lie.
Don't understand? Basically it means that Harry never says anything that he knows isn't true, but suppose he was blind and someone told him that the sky is green. Then Harry might tell someone else the same thing. He wouldn't be lying because he thinks it's true, but since it's not true he wouldn't be telling the truth. I will be keeping Harry like this. If you look carefully, you'll see that Harry has never lied in this story, nor will he ever. Fortunately there are ways to get around such a disadvantage. If you still don't understand what I'm talking about (I won't be surprised as I SUCK at explanations) then either forget about it, or e-mail me for a better explanation.
H/H FOREVER!
Bye!