Disclaimer: We own nothing but the scrunchies in our hair, and the rock and stone we wrote this on!
Summary: What do you get when you put the Golden Trio, Two Dynamic Duos and Two Lone Rangers into one house? The Real World, Harry Potter style, of course.
The Real World: Harry Potter Style
Chapter One: The Daily Prophet
Ginny Weasley got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her head and body. She looked up at the clock in her bather room. She had an hour to get ready before she left for work.
"Gin, Ihave pancakes and sausage made for breakfast! Hurry up before I eat it all myself!" Collin yelled. Ginny took his threat to heart. Living withseven brothers and then her best friend; Collin, for the last 21 years has taught hernot tounderestimate the eating abilities of males. She used a quick drying spell on her hair and charmed it to stay curled and bouncy for the rest of the day. She put her knickers and work robes on, then ran out the bathroom.
"You made chocolate chip pancakes!" Ginny squealed in delight. Collin grinned at her as she piled pancakes and sausages on to her plate. Ginny reached for the syrup and poured it on.
"Yuck, Gin, how can you put that much syrup on your pancakes? I already put extra sugar in them at your request." Collin complained as she shoveled the food into her mouth.
"Bish mop jhat mush." Ginny answered with her mouth full.
"Um, pardon? I couldn't understand you with your pancakes practically falling out of your mouth! I swear you have an appetite like your Ron's!" Collin glared at her. Ginny swallowed all her food.
"I said; It's not that much, and where's the pumpkin juice?" She asked while looking around, as if expecting it to pop out of nowhere.
"You drank it all yesterday." Collin answered simply. Ginny's head whipped around as she sent him a death glare.
"What? You can buy the groceries once in a while! I'm sorry I forgot your pumpkin juice your highness." Collin said coldly. Ginny let out a frustrated howl as Collin picked up the Daily Prophet. He was used to Ginny's little outburst, he figured they were caused by lack of money and ass.
"I'm tired of our lack of money! We need money!" Ginny yelled while pounding her fist on the table and spitting food out of her mouth and onto the back of the Daily Prophet. She clamped a hand over her mouth and giggled.
"You need sex." Collin remarked from behind the Daily Prophet. Ginny glared at him again.
For the next 20 minutes they ate in silence. When they were done Ginny decided to clean up. She brought all the dishes to the sink and started washing them. She looked over her shoulder at Collin who had his nose in the Daily Prophet again. This was odd, because he barely read the damned thing. When Ginny finished cleaning up she sat down by Collin.
"Anything interesting?" Ginny asked. Collin looked up from the paper.
"Surprisingly...yes, there is."
"Well? What is it?" Ginny asked eagerly. Collin cleared his throat.
"There's an ad here that says they neednine people to live together for half a year. After thesix months each person picked for it gets 500 galleons andtwo winners from the house win an all expense paid trip around the worldwith a friend of their choice." Collin looked up from the paper. He knew this would interest Ginny.
"Let me see that!" Ginny demanded and grabbed the paper from Collin's hands. She quickly read through it.
"Oh my god Collin, do you realize what this means!?" Ginny asked excitedly while setting down the paper.
"Yea, the fuckwits over at the ministry have way too many galleons on their hands." Collin joked. Ginny ignored him.
"This means we could be rich! I'm going to send an owl over there right away with our names! Oh gods Collin! This is so exciting!" Ginny squealed and started scribbling their names on a piece of paper with some information about them.
"What are you going to do if we get an owl back saying we didn't get picked?" Collin asked as Ginny called her owl, Pig, to her. She had gotten Pig as a gift from Ron inher 7th year at Hogwarts. Ginny sent the owl on its way with the letter and turned towards Collin.
"Well, I'll send another owl right away, same as the last mind you except I'll attach my knickers to it this time, being a C cup has got to be good for something." Ginny said seriously. Collin let out a chuckle, but looking at Ginny's face he stopped abruptly.
"You wouldn't…would you?" Collin asked nervously, but Ginny just looked up at the clock.
"Damn! I'm going to be late." She huffed and ran out the dory. Collin looked around the now silent room.
"She would, wouldn't she?" He asked himself aloud.
~*~
Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley, also known as the Golden Trio, sat around the kitchen table eating breakfast. All of them had their respectable jobs to go to later that morning.
Harry and Ron were both aurors. After the defeat of Voldemort, they both decided they wanted to defeat any evil that was still in the world.
Hermione was president of the world national S.P.E.W organization. All of them were very successful and all of them were very wealthy.
"Oh Ron, did you have to take the last slice of cake? I only got one piece and you got three." Hermione complained. Ron took a drink of pumpkin juice to wash the cake down.
"Sorry Mione, but at least you got a piece." Ron said.
"You always eat the last of things! You never even ask if anyone wants the last piece."
"I said I'm sorry already, jeez. Don't get your knickers all up in a bunch."
"Well, sorry won't bring the piece of cake back!"
"What do you want me to do? Throw it back-"but Ron was cut off.
"Oh sod off the both of you. You're giving me a headache, must you two always argue in the morning?" Harry interrupted.
"Sorry." They mumbled. Everyone ate in silence for at least 5 minutes.
"Ron must you have so much pumpkin juice? I have to go to the store everyday to buy more." Hermione complained again. Harry knew it was useless to try and get them to stop again, so he decided to ignore them by reading the Daily Prophet. An ad in the paper caught his eyes. He read through it. A big grin playing about his face, but neither Ron not Hermione noticed, since they were caught up in their argument.
"No Hermione, pickles are pickles and cucumbers are cucumbers."
"Ron, pickles are pickled cucumbers, I use to make them with my mum when I was younger."
"I still don't believe you..."
Harry looked back and forth between his friends and began to laugh. They both looked at him as if they just realized he was there.
"What?" they asked simultaneously.
"Nothing, just listen to this ad in the Daily Prophet."
Nine people to live together for half a year! After the six months each person picked will get 500 galleons! Two winners from the house will get an all expense paid trip around the world with a friend of their choice
"What's the catch?" Ron asked suspiciously. Harry knew that if Ron was picked he planned to give part of the money to his parents and part of it to his sister Ginny.
"The house resides in Muggle London; you can't use magic, at all." Harry answered slowly, reading the small print at the bottom.
"Well, that sounds interesting." Hermione said cheerfully.
"I say we do it." Ron encouraged.
"Alright." Harry and Hermione said together. Ron wrote a letter with their names, the appropriate information and sent it with Harry's owl, Hedwig.
"This will be good for you Ron, then I can prove to you that pickles are made form cucumbers." Hermione said suddenly. Ron glared at her.
~*~
Draco Malfoy sat in the kitchen doing what he did best, ordering people around. Sitting with him was his partner in crime, Blaise Zabini. They both were known as Britain's sexiest bachelors, although they look opposite of each other. Draco had straight silver-blonde hair gray eyes and was pale. Blaise had wavy black hair that often fell in front of his dark blue eyes with tan skin. Both had well toned muscles that they earned from working out. They owned a business that made quidditch called "Quidditch Keeps". It forced "Quidditch Supplies" out of business the first week. Yes, life was good for the two bachelors.
"No fucktard! I asked for toast, not warm bread. I expect toast with my eggs, not fucking warm bread. If I wanted warm bread I would press a piece of bread against your ass. Now get me my toast." Draco yelled at the unfortunate house elf and threw the bread at him. The house elf bowed and apologized. Blaise snickered as Draco rubbed his temples.
"You know Draco." Blaise said while taking a bite out of his eggs. "I think you're getting to soft with your house elves." Blaise took a drink of his fire whiskey. Draco looked up.
"How do you figure?" He asked without interest.
"Well, normally you would have thrown the whole plate of toast at it." Blaise look at him
"Maybe I have decided to join 'spew' and fight for the rights of house elves everywhere." Draco answered. They both looked at each other in the eyes. They did this for about a minute before laughing.
"That's a good one Draco, I almost believed you for a second." Blaise chuckled.
"Yea, I know, I'm so funny." Draco complimented himself.
"Here's your toast sir." A small voice interrupted. Draco snatched the plate of toast and began to eat his eggs. After they finished eating one house elf gathered their plates and another one brought Draco the Daily Prophet. Draco opened it up and began to chuckle.
"What?" Blaise asked without interest, as he was too busy looking at Play Witch magazine a house elf had brought for him.
"I think I need a vacation Zabini."
"Then take one."
"No, I want one that is already paid for." Draco said. Blaise looked up from the centerfold of his magazine.
"Okay I'm listening'." Blaise said.
"Nine people live together, half year, everyone gets money, and two winners of the house get an all expense paid trip around the world and get to bring one other friend." Draco briefed.
"Do it." Blaise said simply and went back to his magazine. Draco told one of his house elves to send an owl with the information the letter needed. The house elf scurried away to follow orders. Draco then picked up another copy of Play Witch magazine off the table and began to fill his mind with naked witches.
~*~
"Honey! I'm home!" Ginny Weasley yelled as she shut the door behind her.
"How was work at the Leaky Cauldron?" Collin asked as he walked into the kitchen.
"Awful, some old man thought that I would like to be spanked as a tip instead of getting money." Ginny huffed as she made her way to her bedroom to change.
"That sucks." Collin sympathized as he began to get supper ready.
"I told Luna about that contest thing in the paper today at work." Ginny yelled from behind her bedroom door.
"Why'd you do that?" Collin asked as he fried up some hamburgers. Ginny came out of her room and wrapped her arms around Collin's waist.
"Mmmmm you're making hamburgers! My favorite!" Ginny purred. Collin smiled and Ginny took a seat at the kitchen table. Collin looked over at his beautiful friend. Her hair was still the same as it was this morning, but she wore a short spaghetti strap, yellow sundress with matching heels. Collin couldn't help but admire how nice Ginny always looked, even with their lack of money. She usually received clothes from her brothers as gifts, and sometimes she did a bit of modeling, but she wasn't serious about it. She loved to eat too much to give it up just for a job.
"What did you say while I was getting changed?" Ginny asked while she set the table. Collin thought for a minute.
"Uhh, oh yea! I asked why you told Luna about the contest." He remembered. Ginny frowned.
"Why wouldn't I tell her?" she said slowly as if thinking about what she was saying.
"Well, what if she was chosen and not you?" Collin set a plateful of hamburgers on the table.
"Damn, I didn't think about that. Oh! I know! I'll tell her I drew that ad myself and glued it on to the paper as a joke!" Ginny exclaimed as she reached over to grab a hamburger.
"She wouldn't believe you. Everyone knows you can't do anything artistic. Even if someone held you up at wand point and said 'Draw me a stick figure portrait of me, bitch.' You'd probably be dead." Collin said a matter-of-factly. Ginny threw a hamburger at him.
"Hey! My sweat went into making these hamburgers!" Collin said with mock hurt.
Suddenly Pig flew into the house looking very pleased with himself. He held a letter in his mouth which caused Ginny to let out a squeal and wrestle the letter out of his mouth. Pig looked expectantly at her hamburger.
"Not a chance." Ginny said, noticing the look of want in Pig's eyes. As Ginny began to open the letter Pig attacked her hamburger anyway. Collin watched in amusement as Ginny began to throw various things at the owl. She set the letter down as she chased theowl into her bedroom. Collin took this opportunity to read the letter himself. His eyes quickly scanned the letter.
"Whoa, that was fast." Collin murmured.
"What was?" Ginny snapped while walking into the kitchen looking rather cross. Collin thrust the letter into Ginny's hands and she squealed.
"Oh my god Collin! We were picked!" Ginny threw her arms around Collin's neck. He smiled into her chest.
~*~
Hermione Granger sat by the kitchen table writing a report up for work. She looked up at the clock a few times.
"It's 7 o' clock! Where are they?" Hermione asked aloud. She finished her report and decided to start making supper. It was 7:30 when Harry and Ron walked in looking rather wind swept.
"You're-"Hermione began
"Late." Harry finished.
"We know." Ron said while taking a seat at the kitchen table.
"What are you making Mione?" Ron asked while taking his shirt off.
"Food." Hermione grunted as Harry took his shirt off too. By the time Hermione set supper on the table, her two friends were sitting in their boxers. Hermione smiled inwardly. She knew one hell of a lot of girls would love to be in her shoes. She smiled as Harry and Ron inhaled the spaghetti she made.
"Good. Spaghetti. Mione." Ron complimented between bites.
"Yea." Harry grunted as he began to lick his plated. Hermione giggled.
"Aren't you hungry?" Harry asked while putting his dish in the sink.
"No, Mandy Brocklehurst treated me to supper." Hermione said, but Harry and Ron did not appear to be listening, since they were playing rock-paper-scissors.
"What are you doing?" She asked.
"We are playing rock-paper-scissors to see whose turn it is to wash the dishes." Harry informed her as he chose rock.
"Ha! I win, 2 out of 3! You're turn to wash the dishes Weasley!" Harry cheered. Ron grumbled as he cleared the table of all the dishes.
"I'm going to get some clothes on." Harry informed them and went to his bedroom. At that moment Hedwig flew in carrying a letter. She took the letter out of its beak and gave it a treat. She opened the letter and began to read it.
"Hey guess what guys? We were chosen for that contest!" Hermione called excitedly. A dressed Harry and a near naked Ron crowded around her to look at the letter.
"Ha! I knew we would." Ron said triumphantly. Hermione shook her head. Just then Ron let out a yell and Harry was laughing madly. Hermione turned in time to see Ron running naked from the room. She closed her eyes and turned around.
"I did not need to see that!" She whined. Harry snaked his arms around her waist and hugged her.
"It's ok Hermione; I understand you would like to see me naked rather than Ron." Harry said with mock sympathy. Hermione swatted him over the head.
"In your dreams Potter." she sneered; doing a very good imitation of Draco Malfoy.
~*~
"I thought you were good too." Draco purred in the young brunette's ear. She was about 19 years old. Draco sucked on her ear and she ran her fingers through his hair.
"Hmm, just like that." She giggled. Draco cupped on of her naked breasts in his hand and positioned himself on top of her.
"I say we go for Round Two." He murmured and kissed her neck.
"I think so too, Mr. Malfoy." She purred. Draco sat up and straddled her hips. He took his finger and traced her lips.
"I think we should play bad Headmaster and naughty schoolgirl." He suggested. The girl let out a squeal of delight as he started "Round Two". Blaise Zabini scowled as he sat in the living room.
"I swear that man gets more ass then a rental car!" He said aloud. Blaise heard another scream from Draco's room.
"Here is the book you requested Mr. Zabini." A small voice said. Blaise snatched the book from the house elf.
"Draco could at least have the decency to put a silencing charm on the room, but no, he has to let the whole world know he's getting ass on a regular basis." He growled at the elf. The elf nodded and left. Blaise began to rub his temples when another house elf came in.
"What do you want?" He sneered. The elf walked up to him and handed him a letter.
"This just came in." the house elf squeaked and ran off. Blaise tore the letter open and began to read. His features broke out into his first smile that day. He took the letter with him and barged into Draco's room.
"Can you stop fucking your whore for a couple of minuets?" Blaise asked. Draco got off the girl and looked at him.
"I'm not a whore!" The girl yelled at him.
"Sure you're not." Blaise said absentmindedly.
"What did you want Zabini?" Draco asked. Blaise threw the letter at him. Draco caught it and began to read. He too started to smile. The naked girl tried to look at the letter but Draco folded it up and set it on his dresser.
"We're half way to an all expense paid trip around to the world!" Blaise exclaimed. Draco let out a holler of victory then turned to the girl in his bed.
"Get out of here." He growled and pushed her out of the bed. The girl tried desperately to cover herself, but it was in vain.
"You told me you cared for me!" She screamed at him. Draco merely shrugged and threw her clothes at her.
"I'm sure you know your way out." He said coldly. The girl got her clothes on and stomped out of the room.
"10 galleons say she comes back and throws something hard at you." Blaise sneered as Dracoput his boxers on.
"Deal." He said. A couple minutes later they heard someone stomping towards the door. The girl barged in and threw a toilet plunger at him. He ducked and it hit the wall behind him.
"A toilet plunger?" he sneered.
"Yes! Because you're shit!" She yelled and left the house.
"Pay up man." Blaise smirked.
~*~
Captain Pirate Jack Sparrow's Notes: That's the first chapter! I Hope you enjoyed it, though PinkSunryse wrote the first chap, not me! Chapter two is mine! Review Please!
PinkSunryse's Notes: I hope you enjoy this chapter and read stories that we wrote, other then this one. And if you guys have anything you want us to do in future chapters, please hesitate to ask. Lol, jk. Anywho, please review.