She Will be Mine - Part IV
Once again, I found myself waiting a couple of days before I could resume 'The Plan - Alternative C.' As I promised Hermione, I acted my normal, wholesome self over those two days, and she did remark that she liked me better this way. Little did she know what I had in store for our Head Girl. Mwhahaha!
Er, yeah, anyways, Plan C. Plan C was based on the third person that Hermione fancied: Goddamn Ernie Macmillan. In all honesty, I do like the guy (when he doesn't have his grubby paws all over my Hermione!), but he has been known to be a bit pompous at times. Being named Head Boy (don't get me started on that one…I didn't want to be Head Boy anyways, so there!) only inflated the size of his head, so much in fact that Ron took to calling him 'Percy version 2.0.'
My rather disappointing results with Plan A led me to believe that being pompous wasn't the way to go, though I suppose common sense should have told me that, but let's focus on the positive, shall we? So, what did Goddamn Ernie Macmillan have that I didn't have? I figured it had to be the grades then. Goddamn Ernie Macmillan was also more conversant with hoity-toity things, like politics and history and a bunch of other crap no one really cares about. Except Hermione. Though I never got the impression that Hermione was disappointed with my level of intelligence, maybe that's what she liked in a wizard. After all, though I'm not sure how intelligent VK is, he was a seventh year, so I'm sure he knew a lot of interesting things (though casting a corporeal Patronus wasn't among them…heh) So, Plan C began to take shape. Be more smarter! There's no way this could backfire, right? I mean, how could my becoming more intelligent possibly annoy Hermione? I started my journey on smartification in the most obvious place: the library.
Unfortunately, I couldn't find a spell or potion to make me smarter, so I briefly considered giving up. But I'm the Boy-Who-Lived, not the Boy-Who-Quit! I never gave up on anything, unless it involved books or homework or studying or reading or…ah hell, that pretty much describes Plan C, right? Reading and studying and all that? Oh well, I had already cleared out my calendar for this, so I might as well try it anyways.
I spent the next few days paying attention in class like I never had before. I even took notes in Professor Binns' class - it was crazy! Hermione must have thought that had a fever when she saw that. But no, I assured her that I had turned over a new leaf; she lauged and said something about 'better late than never.' I also spent nearly as much time in the library as she did, excepting time for Quidditch, of course. I took to reading The Daily Prophet as well in order to become more up-to-date with current events. I even started reading some works of fiction that Hermione droned on about every now and then. Okay, it was actually the wizarding cliff notes, but still…
After about a week of reading and learning, I started dropping hints that I was brainy now. A remark here about the latest news in The Daily Prophet, a comment there about the novel Hermione was reading. Things were going along just swimmingly; but then again, I had thought that things were going well with Plans A and B, and look how they turned out.
Hermione and I were talking in the Gryffindor common room one evening when I decided to show the extent of my new-found intelligence. There was a news article that morning about the elections for Minister of Magic. Usually I care not a whit about politics, but I took the opportunity to show Hermione how well-informed I was. And let me tell you, I was magnificent! I talked about the current political landscape and threw in references to past elections. I compared Muggle and wizarding politics, and I ended with a rather brilliant commentary about the need for reform in the Ministry. I couldn't have done better if I had researched it earlier, written it all down, and then memorized it, which of course I had. After I was done with my spiel, I looked over at Hermione, expecting her to be in awe of my magnificence, stars shining in her eyes.
Unfortunately, I don't think she was even paying attention. "Hermione?" I asked. "Did you hear what I said?"
She started a bit and focused her eyes on me, giving off a tired chuckle. "I'm sorry Harry. It's just that I'm not much in the mood for politics tonight."
I was incredibly disappointed. I mean, all that effort wasted! But of course, I couldn't let her know that. Besides, if she really wasn't paying attention, I could always use it again later. "Ah, okay." She then gave me an appraising look, which made me a bit nervous. "What?" I asked.
She shook her head. "I'm not sure. You've been acting funny again."
"Funny? Funny how? Funny like a clown?"
She grinned. "No…funny-odd. Though I shouldn't complain, since you are studying more, but still, you're just a bit different."
Hmmm…'different' - that didn't sound like she was suddenly discovering my manly charms. I sensed Plan C was going down in flames. "Different good or different bad?" I ventured.
She cocked her head. "Just…different. I guess I'm not used to talking about literature and politics with you, you know? I mean, I expect those types of discussions during Prefect meetings, but with you, I feel like I can be a bit more…brainless."
Oh sh!t. Brainless? Did she just call me brainless? I felt something twist inside my chest. "Brainless?"
"Yeah," she continued with a small smile, apparently oblivious to the fact that she was crushing my heart beneath her fashionable shoes. "You know…I can goof off with you and talk about inane things."
I bent my head and rubbed my forehead. Did that actually just happen? Did she just call me inane? Was I just comic relief to her, a way to relax after hanging out with her more intelligent friends?
"Harry, are you all right?" I heard her ask.
"Yeah, fine," I mumbled, still rubbing my temples. I found that I was having trouble breathing.
"Harry, you're not fine," she said as she reached out for me.
The second her hand came in contact with my wrist, I pulled it away rather harshly. "Don't."
"Harry, what's gotten into you?" she asked.
I stood. "So that's how you see me, huh? As some brainless idiot?"
Hermione looked surprised. "Harry, no, of course not-"
"No, I get it now. I'm just someone you go to for some mindless chatter, for when you need a break from intelligent discussion." Some part of me knew that I was being unfair, that I was overreacting, but God my chest felt like there was something twisting around inside it. I knew I had to get out of there before I made a complete fool out of myself. I headed towards the portrait hole.
"Harry, please wait," I heard Hermione say, and then I felt her hand on my arm.
I ripped my arm out of her grasp. "Leave me alone," I said evenly. As I climbed out of the portrait hole, I knew that I needed to get out of there, out of the castle even. Hogsmeade, I could go to Hogsmeade and drink firewhiskey until all of this was but a hazy memory. It was my only choice.
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