Thanks to kensit, Hermione's Phoenix (I hope this chapter's length makes you happy! If not, say so!), LisaGrint2, Dannie_Dumbledore, fenriswolf, Chariot, HnH4EvA19, starr22, Sk8erWitch, Jenna Kathleen, Kaydeek70, phoewolfnix, twistedbutsane55, KypDurron, kw702955, and anonymous for your reviews!
Sorry it took so long. School just ended for me (I hate finals! Gah!) But now that I have some on my hands, expect that I'll be updating my stories much more often! Sorry, also, that I couldn't personalize my thank-you's too much-wanted to get this out as fast as I could!
~-~-~-~-~-~
Isn't Enough
Chapter 3: Confusion
~-~-~-~-~-~
(Harry)
Ron and I apparated and portkeyed to New York city once more the following day. Ginny had convinced us that we couldn't do a thing knocking on her door 1 a.m. in the morning but make everything worse, and possibly get the police involved. Walking to the concert hall we had seen earlier we stood outside, watching people dressed in suits and dresses walking into the golden entrance.
"Maybe we should buy a ticket," I said, staring at the poster of Hermione. Ron glanced at it and nodded.
We sat in the red seats, a perfect view of the stage beneath us. After fifteen minutes composed of me shredding the program into tiny pieces of paper and Ron continuing to repair it for me with a whisper and a wave of his wand, the lights finally began to dim slightly. I fidgeted in my seat nervously, my heart pounding in my ears.
A figure walked onto the stage, and although Ron and I had bought the cheapest tickets in the house, I knew exactly who it was. Hermione, dressed in black pants and a white button up blouse with her hair tied back elegantly...she had never looked as appealing. I felt Ron stiffen up beside me and I knew he recognized her as well. For a tiny second I thought she glanced up in our direction but I must have imagined it. We were so far back, she wouldn't be able to see us. Besides, she wouldn't know Ron.
That idea kicked me in the gut.
Applause sprang up as she took a seat in the middle of the stage and the rest of the orchestra ensembled around her. She gave a nod to the conductor who nodded back and she raised her bow, her eyes closed as she sprang into the opening of the concerto.
After an hour and a half, with four rounds of applause in between, my hands felt numb. She finally stood up, bowing slightly as everyone around us erupted into excited clapping. Ron stood up, wooting as if at a quidditch game, but no one took notice. I actually laughed...it's been a long time since that's happened. He gave me a startled look, grinning as I bended over, overwhelmed with laughter.
And as I wiped away tears of mirth, my eyes glanced to the stage. Hermione had stopped at the edge of the stage and her stare was trained on me, her eyes wide. I straitened up, looking around but she continued to gaze at me, her brown eyes wide and fearful.
Fearful. She was scared.
Oh bloody hell.
~-~-~-~-~-~
(Hermione)
I had just finished my concert for the night and I had gotten up, gracefully holding my cello and taking a slight bow. As I began to walk to the edge of the stage I heard a sound amist all the applause. It was a familiar sound, and although it was slight and very distant, I knew immediately what it was.
Harry's laugh.
When I comprehended what the bloody hell I was thinking my head snapped up and I stopped walking. By pure instinct I looked up and I caught sight of a man laughing, a mop of black hair and those blazing green eyes.
The lunatic who had insisted that I was Hermione Granger.
I stared, completely absorbing the situation. For all I knew, I could be Hermione Granger. I woke up four years ago not knowing anything, wearing robes and a cracked piece of wood underneath me.
I had recognized his voice. I recognized his laugh. I knew who the bloody hell he was without knowing who the bloody hell he was!
I noticed then that he was staring back at me, his green eyes wide as they bore into mine. He was near the back of the concert hall, but that distance meant nothing in that moment of time. It was as if he was standing right in front of me, those eyes drilling into mine with a fierce intensity that made me weak in the knees.
Shaking my head I broke our eye contact, raising my head and continuing to walk off the stage. It must have only lasted a few seconds, but it had elongated to feel as if it had lasted minutes. Minutes of torture.
It was absurd. This entire scenario was absurd. The fact of the matter was, I didn't need my past. I had George. I had success. I had happiness.
I smiled as I peeked out behind the curtain and saw that the audience was still standing. My conductor motioned to me, giving me a grin as I nodded. Stepping back out I stopped in the middle of the stage and took another bow, the volume of applause immense. I stood up and smiled, absorbing the atmosphere and loving the adrenaline pumping through my veins. This was my life. I didn't need anything else.
~-~-~-~-~-~
(Ron)
I noticed Harry continue to stare at Hermione, his face sharing expressions of pain and hopefulness. When she had stared up at him, I had to admit that I felt my hope soar. Maybe seeing us had rekindled something, just maybe. But when she tore her eyes away and stuck her nose up in the air like she always would, I knew we had to do more than just magically show up on her doorstep.
She stepped back outside a moment later, a look of pure bliss on her face as she bowed once more. Her smile radiated; it always had. She wore the same expression she did when she first heard of her O.W.L results, when she was made Head Girl, when Harry had told her that he loved her.
As selfish as it was, it hurt to know she could be that blissful without us in her life.
She walked back off the stage and people around us began to get up, scurrying for the exit as they chattered happily about the concert. Harry and I, already up, walked down the aisle as quickly as we could to try and catch her as she left. I just prayed to Merlin that she was going home after the concert.
We waited outside the entrance to the concert hall for a good hour; we were both too stubborn to admit defeat. I was about to suggest that we go home when I saw her round the corner, humming a song I vaguely recognized.
She stopped when she saw us, but she didn't look at all surprised. It was as if she had been waiting for this moment.
We weren't that bloody predictable or desperate, were we?
"Hermione," Harry whispered, getting up from his previous position next to the wall. He gave me a startled look, obviously begging for me to say something.
Walking up to her I grabbed her hand, bringing it to my lips and giving it a chaste kiss.
"Ronald Weasley," I said, grinning. She gave me a small smile, and I saw a small spark of recognition in her eyes. "And you are..."
"L-Lucy Crimson," she muttered.
"Are you sure about that?" She hesitated.
It was in that moment that I knew we had a chance.
"Yes...I'm sure."
"Look...I know we're asking for a lot. But...just give us a bit of your time. If after that, you...we'll stop bothering you, after that." I sighed. I was babbling...not a good sign.
"What exactly are you asking?" she asked.
"I don't know," I answered truthfully. She cocked her head to the side like she usually would when she was waiting for me to ask for her help for another of Snape's essays...the familiarity was almost unbearable. I wanted to shake her shoulders, scream, demand to know how she could forget. "I'd have to start from the beginning."
She looked around warily, looking fed up with me. I couldn't blame her. I was a complete stranger, and I was asking her to stand there and listen to one babble on. But...
"Allright." I breathed a sigh of relief.
"There was this girl I used to know...she was the best friend I ever had," I whispered, smiling as I imagined her scolding face in my head. "She had quite the temper, such a bossy know-it-all, condescending and had a glare that could turn anyone to ice." My smile grew. "Harry and I...we both loved her." I saw her eyes soften from my words. "I didn't love her like that, though." Here I laughed, remembering how we used to bicker. "Although Harry did, and she finally admitted to loving him back....if there was ever a perfect couple, it was them." Harry remained silent throughout my explanation, his eyes cast downward as he shuffled his feet. "There was a war going on at that time, and Harry was a main target. It was against someone called...V-voldemort." I still stuttered his name. I saw Hermione lower her eyes, her eyebrows scrunched together in concentration. "On our graduation night, they finally attacked our school. And as Hermione chased after the wizard who had killed one of our friends, she..." I stopped then, a sad smile adorning my features as I thought of the irony of it all. "She disappeared, after that. We didn't know what happened to her. Never saw a dead body, a trace. It was as if she had disappeared."
"What happened?"
"Absolutely nothing. We were devastated...still are, in fact. She was just such a big portion of our lives. It's been four years, you know. And we're still not over it. I even cry at night, sometimes." I gave her a sad smile, her brown eyes gazing into mine. "We came, Harry and I, to New York yesterday. That girl...Hermione...she was on a poster. That one, in fact." I pointed to the poster behind her and she twirled around, her eyes gazing openly at the picture. "And I came today, to see if it was really her...if it was really you. And it is. I know it's you."
"Look, I'm sorry, I really am, but I'm Lucy, I'm not your Hermione-"
"You can't be sure about that," I argued. "You don't remember."
"Of course I remember," she said, that ever arrogant rising-of-the-chin reappearing as she stuck her nose in the air.
"No, you don't," Harry whispered. "You lost your memory 4 years ago!"
"That has nothing to do with this!" Hermione screamed, fear evident in her eyes.
"It has everything to do with this! If you would just try, Hermione, try and re-"
"I've told you, I'm not Hermione! I'm Lucy!" She took in a deep breath then, her lips flapping as she tried to find something to say. Finally finding something, she screamed, "I'm not her! If Hermione truly loved you, then she would remember! Obviously, you mean nothing to me! So I can't be her! Why can't you just accept that I don't love you, don't even know you, and that you can't bring Hermione back by pretending she's me!"
The words slapped Harry in the worst ways possible. His green eyes widened at her remark, his lips set in a grim line.
"Harry," I croaked out but he shook his head at me.
"It's uh...fine, Ron. I should've known." Chuckling softly, he ran his fingers through his hair. He walked towards Hermione, and he gently cupped her face with his hands. She looked as if she was about to slap him when his fingers ran over her cheeks, his gaze wandering all over her face. It finally stopped at her eyes where he gazed intensely into them.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, so tenderly I barely heard it. A lump was rising in my throat as I saw his shoulders begin to tremble. "I'm sorry," he repeated, softer. Her lips quivered as she looked into his eyes but he suddenly disappeared with a soft pop.
She stared at me then, tears in her eyes.
"Mr. W-Weasley, I-"
"You know, Harry's been searching for Hermione ever since he lost her," I said darkly, trying to hold in my anger. "And when he found you, he thought-we thought-that we had found Hermione again." I whipped my wand out, my hand trembling as I gripped it. "But you're right, you aren't her." I turned away from her then, gritting my teeth as I muttered, "You couldn't be her." I apparated then. The last image I had of Herm-Lucy was of her staring at me wide eyed, tears streaming down her cheeks.
And for once, that burning passion to bring Hermione back into our lives disappeared.
I had to find Harry.
~-~-~-~-~-~
(Hermione)
"You're right, you aren't her. You couldn't be her."
Those words played in my head all night, not letting me to get a wink of sleep. The logic part of me said good riddance, that I had done the right thing. I wasn't Hermione, and it wasn't good for them to think I was and helplessly hope after it. It was about time someone knocked some sense into their poor brains.
But then another part of me wondered. Wondered about everything that had happened since the man-Harry, I think his name was-hugged me on that streetside corner. I had yelled the most hurtful things I could think of at the time, and the look on his face when I finished...it broke my heart.
Why would it break my heart if I didn't know him? It tore me up inside, I couldn't bear it. When he walked towards me and looked into my eyes, holding me tenderly...lovingly...I began crying too, wanting to take away his pain.
Why would I feel that way if I didn't know him? Love him?
I was about to push him away when he held my face in his hands. But something held me back...thinking about it now, it was because it felt so right. It was as if it wasn't wrong, a complete stranger cradling my face in his hands. It felt natural, comfortable, and it felt perfectly good.
And Ronald Weasley...when he kissed my hand, grinned, a part of me felt as if I knew him. When he talked about her, it triggered something in my mind...the name Voldemort instilled a sudden chill down my spine, and I had no idea why. It just...just couldn't be.
That's right. It couldn't be....
I turned and rolled over in my bed, my eyes drifting shut as those words echoed in my mind...
That's right. It couldn't be...
"Harry!" I screamed happily as he grinned, his green eyes blazing happily.
"Hermione! You came!"
"Of course she came," Fred said, coming towards us and rubbing my head. "She's our good luck charm."
"And she couldn't run away from our charm," George finished, winking at me. "We sexy Weasleys attract the best of women."
"That's disgusting," a drawling voice appeared. Draco Malfoy walked towards us, a smirk adorning his handsome, arrogant features.
"Malfoy," Fred and George stated simultaneously.
"Weasleys." And for once, there wasn't an ounce of sarcasm or repulsion in Malfoy's voice.
"Congratulations," Fred said, smiling slowly.
"Yeah, we didn't expect a prat like you could graduate," George stated.
"Which would explain why you two never did," Malfoy retorted, but the three of them smirked at each other like nothing was wrong in the world.
Harry caught my eye and shook his head, grinning.
"What's this? A party without me?" Ron jogged towards us, his red hair flailing all over the place. "Hermione!" Noticing me he engulfed me in a hug, pulling me close. "We've graduated! We've graduated!"
"Never did I imagine you to survive, Ronald Weasley," I whispered lovingly into his ear. He grinned, landing a quick kiss on my cheek.
"Harry, have you ever seen the Head Girl as beautiful as she is now?" Ron boomed, holding me at arm's length and wiggling his eyebrows.
"Oh, Ron!"
"No, Ron, she's never been more beautiful," Harry said, giving me another one of those looks. I blushed, turning away and smiling sheepishly. I knew it then, as I caught his eye and smiled. He would be the only man I could and would ever blush to. I snorted at myself, when had I ever talked by cliches?
"Oh but I must say, I'm the prettiest out of the bunch," Fred said, shoving his chest out and raising his nose into the air.
We all laughed. Even Malfoy joined in, looking as if he belonged amongst the Weasleys, a Potter and a Muggle-born.
After Dumbledore said his speech Harry, Ron, Fred, George, and Ginny walked up to the stage. All of us whooped, clapping as Ron saluted to us as he slung his guitar around his shoulders. Harry grinned at me, taking the mic and blowing on it softly.
"1 2 3 4!" Ginny shouted, clapping her drumstick together. Immediately the band fell into rhythm, a fast beat full of energy.
"I remember seeing you out there," Harry sang, his eyes on me. "I remember feeling that the calm crisp air...was feeling rather different...I should have taken that big hint...to realizing where we would be...when all this was a memory!" Ron took a quick solo there as Harry stood there, grinning at me. Ginny whooped then as she plunged into her drums, and Harry readied himself for another line. "We'd be standing right where we are now! And looking back I wonder how...we could have let ourselves allow...to forget. The obstacles that we ran over. The hands that we did clasp together. I mean just look at us now! Look at us now!" Here Harry motioned to us, the audience, and we all clapped and cheered. "Standing here...where we are now...how could we have let us allow...to imagine us anywhere else...than here." Harry stepped down from the platform then, walking towards me. "Because we should have known from the beginning. Where we would be now." He grinned at me, his voice a steady tempo as he finished, "We'd be right here, grinning and cheering. Where else could we possibly...be."
And as the crowd broke into applause, as Harry was overwhelmed with fans and handshakes and pats on the backs and hugs, as Ron blew into another happy guitar solo and the crowd continued the cheer, as Ginny whirled around and yelled in happiness, as Draco Malfoy winked at me, as the Weasley twins grinned at each other and joined Ron in his frantic jumping and frenzied playing, as I looked around and saw everyone I knew smiling and laughing...as I looked up at the sky and saw everyone else smiling upon us...as I looked to the right to see the staff clapping and cheering...as I saw Harry grin at me from over the crowd and give me another one of those looks...as I was lifted by two people I recognized as none other than Bill and Charlie Weasley to the stage to join the remaining Weasleys...as I saw my parent's smiling faces in the crowd...I knew, absolutely knew, that this was what philosophers called perfection.
Ron finished his playing, sweat adorning his hairline and his breathing ragged. He pulled me close and hugged me tight, tears falling onto my neck as he hid his face in the crook of my shoulder. I joined him in crying, and Ginny got up to fall in with us. Fred and George clapped me and Ron on the back, but eventually joined the circle. Draco found his way in somehow, hugging Ginny around the middle and whispering things into her ear as she sobbed more uncontrollably. I myself saw tears trail down his cheeks. Finally, Harry made his way out of the crowd to wrap his arms around me and Ron, tears rolling down his cheeks freely as well. Harry, Ron and I looked at one another and I let out a whispered, "We made it."
My eyes opened slowly as I heard someone calling my name. For a second I saw green eyes, messy black hair and a soft grin gazing in front of me. I smiled, a whispered, "Harry?" escaping my lips. The eyes blinked and I saw them for the brown color they originally were. The black hair and grin evaporated in front of me, and I saw in their place George Becker, a worried expression on his face.
"Harry? You mean that bloke I met two days ago?"
"Y-yes," I said, blinking frantically. "That...that bloke."
"Were you...expecting him?"
"No, no, he was just in a dream I had." Noticing his expression, I hurried to say, "I was just remembering my school days, and we were in detention together."
"Oh," he said, laughing. "You better wake up, you promised that you'd come see me in the 'Battle of the Bands,' remember?"
"Yes, yes of course..." I shook my head, closing my eyes and I groggily got up. "Just give me thirty minutes, I'll meet you outside in the café?"
"Sure, Lucy, I'll see you then."
For the first time, I felt as if he wasn't talking to me, that something wasn't right. Then it hit me. I had been expecting him to call me Hermione.
It couldn't be.
My eyes went wide as I realized that Harry and Ron had done something in front of me. They had used...pieces of wood. Wands. They had...what's the word...
...apparated...
That the song I had caught myself singing, humming, whistling countless times had been the song in my dream, the song Harry Potter had sung the day of his graduation.
I yelled in anguish, my world was literally falling apart around me.
How the bloody hell could it be.
~-~-~-~-~-~
reviewing's good for the soul...