Unofficial Portkey Archive

By Searching by merletto
EPUB MOBI HTML Text

By Searching

merletto

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Chapter TWO- a wedding and a confession

Harry checked his reflection in the mirror once again. He straightened his tie, and gently dusted his coat. His hair was still uncontrollable, but a little dash of Muggle hair gel helped calm it down, just a little bit. He sighed in despair, wondering if his wild untamed hair would ever be domesticated. His appearance was at least presentable. But Harry could still see something wrong with his reflection. Even behind his silver-rimmed glasses, the sadness was still visible in his emerald eyes.

It's Ron's wedding, he reprimanded himself. Don't ruin it for him. At least wait until the reception is over. She'll be there.

His hand went into his jacket pocket, where he found a small black box. He opened it and stared at the simply-cut diamond ring he had picked out at Tiffany. Sighing, he closed the box, replaced it in his pocket, and made his way to the groom's room.

****************

Hermione finished applying the last touches of makeup. She heard her door open, and turned when she saw her mother's reflection in the mirror. Fingering through her jewelry chest, she found a string of pink pearls and held it out for her mother to help clasp it on her.

Jane smiled softly at her daughter, as she took in the site Hermione made in her dress, a lavender thin-strapped gown that flowed loosely to her ankles, just slightly clinging to her slim figure. Hermione's normally bushy hair was twisted into a knot, leaving only few strands of curls whisping gently around her slender neck. She took the pearls from Hermione's hands and gently clasped it around her daughter's neck. It was interesting that her daughter picked out a necklace that Harry had given her on her nineteenth birthday. Jane and her husband Robert had picked out pink pearl earrings, and when Hermione came back from her birthday dinner date with Harry with this string of pearls, Jane had been surprised. She had her doubts about Harry's feelings for her daughter, but after looking at the pearls, she no longer doubted that her daughter's best friend had been in love with her since she knew of him.

"You look lovely, darling." Jane vouched on saying nothing about the pearls.

Hermione blushed. "Thank you, Mum. I do look all right, don't I?"

"Of course you do. Everyone would be so taken with you, especially Harry."

Hermione frowned. "Oh, Mum, I do wish you'd stop talking about Harry like that. I'm fairly sure that we're only just friends."

Jane shrugged her shoulders slightly. "If that's what you want. But just promise me, that you'll talk to Harry before you come home tonight."

Hermione nodded. "I will." After glancing at the wall clock, she went to her bed and grabbed the present that was lying there. "I should get going. The wedding will start in a few minutes." She kissed her mother's cheek and carefully treaded down the stairs. Taking a small pouch off the mantel in the fireplace, she spoke clearly, "the Burrow." Jane watched as the green flames engulfed Hermione, and she was gone.

****************

Harry found Ron in his room, pacing about, with a green look on his face. He had seen the same nauseating look on Ron's other brothers' faces, when each of them had gone through their own weddings. He was sure that as soon as Ron saw Lauren walk down the aisle, all uncomfortable squirmishes would disappear. He placed an arm around his best friend's shoulders, hoping that would help him relax.

"Harry, mate, I don't think I can do this."

Harry patted Ron's shoulder. "You'll be fine, Ron. You and Lauren had been waiting for this day for the past two years. Now that it's here, you just have to go and make her your wife."

"But, what if I find out that I don't love her enough? What if I snore in my sleep, and what if SHE snores?"

Harry laughed. "Ron, you do snore in your sleep, and no, you wouldn't have to worry about Lauren snoring with all the noise you make."

"What if I fall in love with someone else?"

"Then make sure you buy a comfortable couch for your new flat."

"What if she falls in love with someone else?"

"You're a wizard; you should know what to do."

"What if……"

Harry held out a hand in front of his best friend. "Stop, Ron. You're only making yourself more nervous. You love her, and she loves you. Almost five years of being in love with each other, and you're doubting the relationship you have? Well, granted, it's you who's facing the altar. But if you don't do this by yourself, your bride's going to charge in here and drag you down the aisle herself.

Lauren's a wonderful woman, and Ron, you're a good man too. You're perfect for each other, and don't ever doubt what you two have. You'll never find it anywhere else." Just like how I feel about…

Ron slowly took a deep breath and grinned nervously. "Yeah, you're right. I can't just leave her there, can't I? Well then, mate, if you have the rings, I suppose we should get the bandwagon going."

Harry laughed again. "Let's go, Ron. To make you officially Lauren's."

**********************

Hermione dusted the soot off the skirt of her gown. After a few unsuccessful pats, she lifted the hem of her dress and pulled her wand out of its holster that was tied around her thigh and scourgified her dress. The living room to the Burrow was a mess, as red-head after red-head were running about for last minute errands before the big wedding.

Molly Weasley found Hermione standing in front of the fireplace. Her flushed face showed the excitement and nervousness of witnessing her last son's wedding to the woman he loved. She pulled Hermione out to the garden. "Oh, Hermione darling, the wedding's starting soon. Come, sit next to Bill and Colette." They found an empty seat next to the oldest Weasley son and his wife. Bill nodded at her and she smiled back, after exchanging greetings with Colette.

Hermione gazed about her surroundings. The middle of Molly's spring garden was now decked with two columns of chairs, leaving only an aisle big enough for the wedding entourage to pass through. At the end of the aisle, a white podium stood, and on the side were bouquets of Molly's flowers. Behind the podium was a small menagerie, with vines draping the poles. The setting was beautiful, and Hermione was glad that Ron and Lauren had decided to go with a traditional Muggle wedding ceremony.

She smiled gently as Ron waved at her from where he stood in front of the podium. She was very proud of Ron. He stood so proudly, and she prayed in her heart that he and Lauren would live happily ever after. He turned to whisper in Harry's ear, who at that time had his back toward her. When he turned around, she flushed at his gaze. He looked very handsome in his suit, and she found herself locked in with his bright green eyes.

The minister took his place in front of the podium, and the string quartet began playing Pachelbel's Canon in D. Hermione closed her eyes as she took in the music, but she opened them quickly as she heard rustling of people turning their bodies to watch as the flower girl and bridesmaid slowly marched their way to the front. After Ginny, the maid-of-honor, took her spot in the front, the music changed to the wedding march, and the entire audience stood. Lauren stood at the end of the aisle on her father's arm, looking very elegant and beautiful, so much that she took Hermione's breath away. And Ron's as well.

As soon as Lauren reached the podium, her father kissed her cheek, and she smiled shyly at Ron, who took her hand and held it tightly as they stood in front of the minister. They both recited their vows to each other, and as they slipped their wedding bands onto each other's fingers, Hermione felt her heart constrict with pride. From the corner of her vision field, she could see Harry still gazing intently at her. She turned her head to escape his gaze, though she was already blushing.

And then the minister pronounced, "May I present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Ronald Weasley."

*****************************

The wedding reception was held in the same garden. All the staging props from the wedding were cleared off with magic, and now there were tables covered with white linen around the garden, with a long table of delicacies that the hired caterers had prepared. At the end of said table was a beautifully towered wedding cake. The bride and groom sat next to each other as friends and family came over to them to congratulate them. Harry stood next to Ron dutifully, but no one could erase the proud look he had on his face as he watched his friend and his bride. His eyes, however, still stole fleeting glances to one woman, whom, after wishing the happy couple congratulations, had disappeared from the wedding grounds.

When the music changed moods once again, Ron helped Lauren to the middle of the dance floor. He held one of her hands and placed the other on his arm. His arms rested lightly on her waist. They moved slowly to the music, her dress swaying between them as they danced.

The rest of the wedding party watched the couple dance. Harry began to imagine the day that he and Hermione would be dancing just as Ron and Lauren were, and he felt himself blushing, in spite of himself. He recalled gazing at her during the wedding ceremony. She was so elegant, in her lavender dress and hair done up, sitting next to Bill and Colette. When Ron and Lauren exchanged vows, he swore he saw tears streaming down her cheeks, and she had gently wiped them off with a small lace hanky. After the ceremony, she came up to Ron and Lauren and gave both of them hugs. This had been the perfect time for him to embed Hermione at Ron's wedding in the bottom of his memory, along with the many images that he had stored in the past.

Ron and Lauren moved closer to where he stood watching. As Ron maneuvered Lauren expertly across the dance floor, Harry caught the look on Ron's face. He knows what I was planning, Harry cringed inwardly. I didn't want him to have to worry about me on his wedding day. A wink from Ron told Harry everything. Ron was prodding him to search for Hermione, using his eyes to point to the direction in which she had headed. Harry gave Ron a lopsided grin, and quietly retreated from the reception toward the forest clearing.

*************************************

Hermione couldn't stand it anymore. Harry's piercing gaze was following her everywhere, while she was sitting enjoying the light refreshments, while talking with their mutual friends from school, and even while Dean Thomas had asked her for a dance. She kindly refused him, and watched relief sweep over Harry's face. Slightly irritated, she decided to take a walk by the forest clearing.

She found the happy couple sitting underneath a maple tree, talking with some of their guests. Ron grinned when he saw her and she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Hermione! I'd say you look ravishing, but my jealous wife is next to me." Ron winked as he returned her hug.

Lauren laughed as she pinched her husband's arm. "That's right. You should know better, Ron Weasley." She gave Hermione a hug as well. "But you do look wonderful, Hermione. That is a beautiful dress!"

Hermione smiled. "Thanks. Mum found it in London. I think it might be Donna Karan." She gazed at them fondly. "The wedding was really beautiful. I'm so happy for the two of you." Her gaze moved to Harry, whose eyes were intently locked on her face. "Harry, you look great yourself too."

She was surprised when Harry did not speak, but nodded his head in reply. "Well, I'll leave you to your own reception. It's a lovely day, isn't it? I think I'll go take a walk." She gave a hug again. "Congratulations, Lauren, you're perfect for him, and take care of Ron, okay?"

Hermione watched Lauren's eyes glisten with tears. Lauren blinked them away and said, "Just be sure that you're back in time for the bouquet throwing." She dropped her voice to a whisper. "And make sure you catch it."

With a glance at Harry, she turned and headed back into the house. She didn't want him to know where to find her that soon. After entering the side door to the house, she weaved her way through the living room and exited via the kitchen door. From there she slowed her pace down and strolled to the forest clearing.

The summers that she had spent in the Burrow were some of her favorites. The boys and Ginny would be playing Quidditch in the backyard, and she would disappear to the forest for a few hours, until Molly called them in for dinner. Most of time, she brought her writing folder with her. Many of her ideas had been generated while sitting against her favorite tree stump, gazing at the pond in front of her, and imagining that she was a lovely countess, who was locked away in her father's castle, waiting for the perfect man to save her from the bondage of aristocracy and old traditions.

On her way to the forest, she ran into Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil. They were, as usual, gossiping, not noticing that she could hear their conversation. Hermione wrinkled her nose irritably and ignored them, until she saw Neville Longbottom and his fiancée Luna Lovegood approaching her.

"Neville! Luna!" she exclaimed as she gave them both a hug.

"Hermione, you look great!" Neville returned her hug. Hermione smiled inwardly. Neville had grown so much over the years, and now that he was studying Herbology in the wizarding university, his confidence grew with his knowledge, especially so when he fell in love with Luna, who was also at the university taking journalistic writing courses.

"Well, now that Ron's married, when are you two going to set the date?"

Luna grinned. "We're going to wait for a few more years. Nev's been busy with his studies, and he's set his ambitions really high. I'm finishing up my courses this year, and Dad's retiring then, so I'll be busy with the Quibbler for a while."

"I see, that's really wonderful, Luna!" Hermione nodded sincerely. "Well, just don't forget to owl me when you do set the date. I'm going to Canada when the school term starts. McGonagall has offered me a position at her school."

Neville grinned. "That's great Hermione!" But his grin faded to a frown when Luna slapped his arm. "But what about Harry?"

Hermione's brows knit with confusion. "What about Harry?"

"Don't mind Neville, Hermione. It's just that every one knows how much Harry really cares for you. But I can see that it's not like that," Luna replied apologetically. "Don't think about it too much, Hermione. I think it's great that Professor McGonagall wants you in her school. We're just going to say goodbye to Ron and Lauren. Maybe we can catch up another time?"

Hermione nodded. "That would be wonderful. I'll see you both later." She watched the couple disappear into the house. As she turned around for the forest again, she grew livid with what Lavender and Parvati were discussing now.

"Did you see that awful dress on Hermione? As if she could pull off a lavender. I just don't understand what Harry Potter sees in her. She's such a plain, dull bookworm," Parvati exclaimed.

Lavender snooted. "She sure does put Donna Karan to shame. I saw that exact same dress two years ago. It's a good thing that I did not buy it then. It would have been a waste of my pounds to have something that smarty-pants Hermione owns."

"And Harry was staring at her like he's never seen a dress be….. oh Hello Hermione! My, that's such a lovely dress on you!" Parvati's tone changed as she saw Hermione standing behind Lavender.

Hermione plastered a fake smile on her face. "How lovely to see you, Parvati and Lavender. And thank you, Parvati. My mum saw this dress in the latest Donna Karan catalog and ordered it for me while I was still at Hogwarts. Oh, Lavender, is that dress from Fendi? I must say, it's quite lovely, but you should put on another face. It just doesn't match too well." She watched as Lavender's face changed color and held her laughter in place. "Well, it was lovely seeing the both of you. Oh, Parvati, you should go to the wedding reception. I must say, Ginny Weasley's dress is just lovely. I wouldn't know much about it. So maybe you should take a look." She walked away, but paced her steps slowly to catch their conversation again.

"Oh, that Hermione Granger is so horrible! She thinks she's better than all of us!"

Hermione laughed as soon as she was an earshot away from Lavender and Parvati.

*************************

Ron was right. She was in the forest clearing. Doing what? He wasn't too sure.

Harry stayed behind a few shrubberies and trees as he watched Hermione strolling through the grass. Her arms were lifted up as she stretched her body, seemingly to be embracing nature. Never had she been more beautiful, when she was so relaxed. Another side of Hermione that Harry loved so much.

He took out the box from his pocket again. This is it. It's now or never. Breathing deeply, he walked toward Hermione.

"Harry?" she whispered, startled.

He grinned wryly at her. God, she's so beautiful. "I haven't seen you since, well, you know."

She nodded. "I know. I'm really sorry. Did that…" she did a slow-motion of a punch. "Did it hurt you very much?"

Harry laughed. "Oh, my. What a swing you have! My jaw hurt for three days!"

Hermione blushed furiously. "You're exaggerating."

"Yeah, I was."

Harry moved next to Hermione and stood next to her as they both stared at the pond. They remained quiet for a long time.

"It's beautiful here, isn't it?" Hermione's soft voice broke the silence.

Harry nodded. "Yeah it is." He stuffed his hand back into his pocket, toying with the box in between his fingers. "Hermione, I need to tell you something."

Hermione's eyes widened with alarm. "Harry…."

He held up his hand to stop her from continuing. "Just let me finish before I lose my nerve." Gently, he grabbed her hand and held it with both of his, caressing her skin softly. "Hermione, ever since fifth year, I've wanted to tell you this so badly. But, with Voldemort's threat, I couldn't. And ever since seventh year, after Voldemort's gone, I've wanted to tell you that… I care so much for you. You're so special to me. And these two years, I've tried to tell you, but….."

Hermione gently pulled her hands away from his. "No, Harry. Don't say anything that you'll regret saying."

Harry tried to grab her hands again, but when she wouldn't let, he tried to plead with his eyes. "No, you don't understand, Hermione. I love…"

"Harry, no! You listen to me! You didn't know what love was when you were living with the Dursleys, and when we've become best friends, that was your first taste of love! I was your first female friend and it's very easy that you would take things the wrong way."

"Hermione, I love you!"

"Of course you do! I love you too! I've always had. You're my dearest friend."

Harry grabbed his head with his hands, his frustrations taking control of his temper. "No, you're the one who doesn't understand! I'm in love with you, and for the past two years, I've done everything to show you my feelings! And you're telling me that I don't know how I feel about you? Every one knows that I love you, and you're the only one who's stupid enough to be blind for the past two years!"

"Well, I don't love you that way, Harry Potter! And don't you dare yell at me!" Hermione flashed back with hot tears in her eyes. She stormed past Harry and tried to leave, but Harry grabbed her arm to stop her. "Let me go, you insufferable prat!"

Harry lowered his voice. "No. Please, don't leave like this."

Hermione's temper subsided a little as she stopped struggling. "Harry, listen to me. You're a wonderful person, and I love you for always being there for me, but I truly think you deserve a better woman. Someone who wants to love you and have your children and grow old with you. Someone who will remain faithful to you no matter what. I'm sorry."

Harry shook his head violently. "No, Hermione. You are the only one for me. I've known so ever since I realized I was in love with you! Please, don't leave me…"

Hermione could feel the pain in her heart. She shook it off as she stared into Harry's eyes, which were now moistened with tears. "Harry, I'm leaving for Canada tomorrow. Really, it's best this way. I'm sorry." With a quick hug and a kiss on his cheek, she ran away, not understanding why her heart was breaking and why she was crying.

Harry fell to his knees and buried his head in his hands, choking between sobs. "Hermione, no, please. Don't leave me….."

Author's Note:

This is the fastest I've ever updated. I'm really enjoying writing this story very much! Thank you all for reviewing. It is really encouraging to know that you enjoy reading as well. Some parts of this chapter may sound weird or be grammatically incorrect. Well, this story isn't beta-ed right now…. Hopefully they're not too bad.

I'm really sorry, but I'm in a pothole right now for Touch. When I first began writing it, I had the plot all worked out, but I need to spend a little time thinking through dialogue and description. So, that story will be on hold for a little while. Therefore I'll be spending most of my free time working on By Searching, hopefully have this finished soon.

Anyhow, I'll just leave things like this for now. :)