Chapter Summary: Hermione tries to help Harry with his chronic nightmares. Will this end well?
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Lavender, Parvati, and Padma were surprisingly quiet on the train ride back to Hogwarts, so Hermione took this time to catch up on her reading. Every now and again she'd glance over her book and find the three girls staring at her. At first she thought they were still seething over her relationship with Harry, but then she noticed that the looks they were giving her seemed to denote curiosity and shock as opposed to anger. Finally Lavender spoke.
"Uh… Hermione," she started timidly.
Hermione put her book down. "Yes…"
"Is it true… what happened at the quidditch game?"
Hermione didn't answer. Did they know that Snape had tried to kill Harry? "What do you mean?"
"Well we heard… that is Padma got a letter from one of her Ravenclaw friends at the beginning of the holidays who heard it from a Hufflepuff boy who overheard Ron and Harry talking about… well… that you saved Harry's life."
"When his broom was acting up," Parvati finally blurted out. "You did something to help him. I remember seeing you running down the stairs to the field."
Hermione was speechless. She guessed that she shouldn't be surprised. It wouldn't have been long before people found out what happened, especially at Hogwarts.
"So it's true!" Lavender took Hermione's stunned silence to be an answer. "You stopped his broom from throwing him off. You saved his life."
"How did you do it? What was wrong with Harry's broom? How did you stop it?" Padma stammered.
"Well I…" Hermione knew she couldn't tell them that Snape had been cursing the broom. "I just used a special charm to dispel jinxes placed on brooms. We think one of the Slytherins cursed it." This, Hermione supposed, was enough of the truth to sound believable.
"You actually saved Harry Potter's life. Hermione, you're incredible," Lavender said sincerely. "We uh… wanted to apologize to you. We've been so mean to you lately because we were… well… jealous of you and Harry."
"Me mostly," Parvati added quickly. "I was trying so hard to get Harry's attention and then all the sudden you were with him without even trying. But I guess I can see why he likes you. I mean, you are the cleverest witch in our year."
Hermione smiled. As much as she wanted to let Parvati think Harry was off limits, she decided to be truthful. It wouldn't be good for her friendship with Harry to have rumors circulating. "It's okay but really, Harry and I are just good friends."
"Well, I don't think I'll ever get him to really notice me anyway," Parvati admitted. "I should stop making a fool of myself."
"Yes, yes you should," Hermione thought to herself.
"Then again…" Parvati had a gleam in her eyes. "If Harry really isn't taken then that means I still have a chance."
Hermione returned to her reading as the three girls started giggling again. It seemed that everything was back to normal with her two roommates. She wondered if that was a good or bad thing.
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Hermione stuck her head out of the horseless carriage that was taking her, Lavender, Parvati, and Padma back to Hogwarts castle. The wind whipped through her thick hair. It was a cool winter wind but it felt good on her face. She smiled as the castle came into view. She felt like she was home again. She looked up at the towers and saw something flying around. At first it looked like an owl, but then she realized it was someone on a broomstick.
It could only be one person. "That boy," Hermione hissed to herself but she smiled anyway.
When the carriage stopped, she took off towards the main doors as quickly as her overloaded schoolbag would allow.
"Hermione, where are you going?" Lavender called after her, but by this time Hermione was inside the castle. She bounded up four flights of stairs to where Gryffindor Tower was but she didn't head for the portrait of the fat lady. Instead she rounded another corner and headed for the familiar statue. By the time she kicked the shin, she was panting and her bag had hit against her one too many times but she didn't care.
She ran up the stairs that led to the ramparts and pushed open the trap door. The wind was blowing much stronger. She pulled out her wand and performed the wind ceasing charm. Then she looked around to see if she could spot Harry again. There was no sign of him or his broomstick.
"Oy, welcome back," said a voice behind her. Hermione whirled around and was met by an unusual site. Harry was hanging upside down from his broomstick.
"You're nutters; you know that don't you?"
Harry jumped down expertly and grabbed his broomstick out of the air. "Glad to see you too. How was your trip?"
"My dad tried to drive me insane, but other than that, fine. How were your holidays?"
"Well actually, that's a bit of a story." Harry said taking a seat. He proceeded to tell Hermione all about how he had gotten an invisibility cloak from an anonymous benefactor on Christmas. He'd used to cloak to try to get in the restricted section of the library to search for Nicolas Flame, but almost got caught by Filch, Mrs. Norris, and Snape. In trying to escape, he had found a remarkable mirror, the Mirror of Erised, which allowed him to see his family, all of his family. It had been such an alluring vision that he had gone back two more nights to see it. The third night though, Professor Dumbledore himself had caught Harry, and though he wasn't angry with him, he asked him not to go looking for the mirror again.
"I've heard of that. I read all about it in 'Rare and Powerful Magical Objects,'" Hermione said. Harry gave her a knowing look but she ignored him. "You'd do good to read it yourself. The invisibility cloak is in there too. It has powers you're not even aware of, like the ability to cover more than just one or two people; it can magically cover just about anything of reasonable size that you want it to. Anyway, the Mirror of Erised is the only one of its kind. It's one of the few magical objects in the world that was never duplicated. It's mysterious but also very very dangerous. Some people have gone mad staring at it. Oooo, Harry I'm glad Dumbledore convinced you not to go back there. Besides, sneaking around three nights in a row? If Filch had caught you, he'd have your head. Still it would have been nice if you had found something on Flamel."
"I see being with your parents all this time has renewed your ability to talk faster than a snitch can fly." Harry laughed. "Don't worry; I don't think I ever want to go near that mirror again. Ever since then… I've been having nightmares."
Hermione bit her bottom lip. "Oh Harry, that's awful. What are they about?"
"My parents… dying. It's vague, but I know that's what the dream is about."
"I'm so sorry. That's such a terrible thing to have to relive."
"Hopefully it will stop soon. Maybe when I'm busy with school and quidditch…" Harry had a look in his eyes that said he thought this was wishful thinking.
"Maybe, I could make a sleeping potion like the one Snape was telling us about that gives the drinker a dreamless sleep," Hermione offered.
"I don't want anything that Snape would suggest." Harry shuddered. "I think I'll pass. By the way, thank you for the Christmas gift." It was obvious he wanted to change the subject.
"Thanks for yours as well." Hermione added. "I really appreciate it. Sometimes I think you actually understand me."
"I know… scary isn't it?"
"Where's Ron?"
"Down in the common room eating some snacks that Fred and George snuck from the kitchens," Harry told her.
"I swear that boy is always eating. Well I'm going to go get him off his duff. We should go to the library. Term will be starting again tomorrow and then we won't have any time to look for Flamel."
"Hermione, it's the last day of break…"
"All the more reason to head to the library now," Hermione reasoned.
Harry sighed. It was obvious that going to the library hadn't been in his plans, but he mounted his broom and took off again.
Hermione stared after him. She was worried about Harry, the nightmares he told her about. She wished there was something she could do. Then again, maybe there was something. After all she was the cleverest witch of her year. Harry was her best friend. She should help him, even if he acted like he didn't want help.
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Snape never paid any attention to Hermione in potions anymore. She had performed so flawlessly in every single lesson that even he couldn't find anything to complain about. So he completely ignored the honor student and instead focused on tormenting Neville, who could barely stand a caldron right side up. Usually it would annoy Hermione that Snape never called on her or acknowledged her during class, but this time she didn't care. In fact she was counting on the fact that Snape wouldn't even check up on her during this particular double potions lesson.
She wasn't making a forgetfulness potion like all the other students. Although it was a very difficult potion to make and Snape had alluded to the fact that it would be part of their finals, she didn't care. She knew she could make it if she needed to and that's all that mattered. Hermione had a better way to spend this time. She was making a special sleeping potion she had found in a library book called "Modern Magical Medicine." There were multiple kinds of sleeping potions, many of which gave the drinker a dreamless sleep. The problem was, most of these knocked a person out instantly, and that wasn't what she wanted.
The potion was for Harry of course. For the past several days, he had come to breakfast looking like he hadn't slept at all. He'd always shrug it off saying that it was just the quidditch practices tiring him out, but Hermione knew the truth. He was still having nightmares and they were keeping him up. She didn't know how to talk to him about it. It seemed so personal and how could she relate to his problem. She'd never lost anyone close to her, and he had lost both his parents. He'd never even known them. The only thing she could offer was to make him a sleeping potion, which he constantly refused for one reason or another.
"He's so stubborn," Hermione thought as she stirred the potion. "He always has to do things the difficult way. Why can't he just let me help him? Then I wouldn't have to go through all this trouble."
Her plan was simple. If Harry wouldn't voluntarily do something about the dreams, then she'd help him without his knowledge. The sleeping potion she'd found was called Narcoryan and was specifically designed not to induce sleep instantly but rather give the drinker a deeper, dreamless sleep when they went to bed naturally. The effects could last anywhere from a few days to several weeks. She would slip some in his drink at dinner and hopefully he would never know. Snape swept by her table but didn't take any notice to that fact that Hermione's potion was a completely different color from what it should have been.
Harry leaned over and whispered, "Are you even doing the assignment or is this some extra credit potion that you've whipped up?"
"Potter!" Snape snapped immediately. "Just because you can't manage to do a simple potion on your own does not give you license to employ the services of Ms. Granger. Five points from Gryffindor."
Harry sighed. "I wish he ignored me like he ignored you," he mumbled before returning his attention to the caldron in front of him.
Hermione looked down at "Modern Magical Medicine" and read the last few instructions. It told her the potion needed to boil for another three hours. That wouldn't do at all. She only had a half hour left in the class and she very well couldn't take a caldron full of potion with her. Snape would definitely be suspicious of that. The potion looked fine, exactly how it was supposed to be, according to the book. She supposed that the boiling time was needed to make it more potent. Well, she didn't need it to be all that strong, it was only for one person and all it had to do was give him a few good nights of sleep. She poured some into a bottle while Harry and Ron weren't looking and tucked it in her bag. Now all she had to do was wait.
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"I hope you're practicing hard for your next quidditch game, Potter," Draco Malfoy said as he strolled up to the Gryffindor table at dinner. It was like clockwork. Malfoy couldn't let a day go by without making some snide comment to Harry. His two lackeys, Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle were with him. Hermione rarely saw him without them, unless he was with Pansy when she came to harass Hermione.
This time though, she was glad Malfoy was there. In fact, she had been counting on it. Both Harry and Ron were distracted from their dinner while they argued with the three bullies. She pulled a small vile out of her pocket and clandestinely slipped its contents into Harry's drink. It was the sleeping potion. The dose she gave him was supposed to last for two weeks but she figured that because it hadn't been allowed to boil for the required length of time, it would only last a few days. In either case, she had already decided to slip him more of the potion when it became apparent he was having the nightmares again. It was always obvious because he came to breakfast extremely tired. Hopefully that would change starting tomorrow morning.
"Can you believe him?" Harry said as he turned back to the table.
Hermione jumped a little as she came back to reality. "I don't know why you bother with that git."
Harry took a sip from his goblet. "He's the one who comes over here. You don't see me going over to his table."
"He only does it because he knows I can't punch him with all the professors watching," Ron added between bites.
Harry finished his juice in one gulp. It magically filled up again within moments. "Good, he's had it all. Now we'll see how good it works."
-----
"Harry, are you okay?" Hermione asked in shock the next morning at breakfast. Instead of looking well rested as she had hopped, Harry looked as if he hadn't even gotten ten minutes worth of sleep the previous night.
"I don't know. I couldn't sleep at all last night," Harry admitted as he laid his head on the table. "I don't know what's wrong with me."
"Was it the nightmare again?" She asked concerned. "I don't understand why my potion didn't work."
Harry shrugged. "I guess. It was like I just couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard I tried and when I did, the least little thing, like Neville's snoring, would wake me up again. I'm glad it's Saturday. I'm going to try and take a nap later on."
"Oh no, something had to have gone wrong." Hermione thought frantically. She jumped up from the table.
"Hey where are you going?" Ron called after her.
"Library," Hermione said hastily.
"But we were going to see Hagrid. We can look for Flamel later you know," Ron shouted at Hermione as she retreated from the Great Hall. "That girl spends way too much time in the library."
Harry's head hit the table again. "Ugh…."
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Hermione had spent almost the entire day in the library. She found another book called "Common Magical Maladies, Ailments, and Side Effects" and looked up the Narcoryan Potion.
"Narcoryan Potion is a very unique magical sleeping aid in that unlike most sleeping potions, it does not induce immediate sleep. It instead helps the drinker by giving them a deeper, dreamless rest during the time they naturally go to sleep. In addition, the potion can last for several weeks. The most common problems associated with narcoryan is when the potion has the exact opposite of its intended use. The drinker will be unable to sleep at all. This is usually caused by improper preparation of the potion. Narcoryan must simmer for at least three hours to prevent this from happening."
Hermione slammed the book shut. She couldn't believe what she'd done. Instead of helping Harry, she'd made things twice as bad. At least he was getting some sleep before, even if he was having nightmares. Now he wasn't able to sleep at all. She was so ashamed of herself.
Hermione spent the rest of the day trying to find a cure or some way to reserve the sleeping potion. She didn't want to use another potion, that would require too much time, plus she couldn't risk trying to slip it into his drink again. That only left spells.
She poured through endless books looking for the right one. The only time she stopped her hunt was when Ron and Harry arrived for a bit to search for Flamel. Harry still looked haggard and they didn't stay long because of this. Hermione felt even worse, so she stayed at the library late into the evening. Madam Pince kept sweeping by. She obviously wanted to close the library but Hermione ignored her. She was resigned to stay until she found what she was looking for or until the librarian threw her out, whichever came first.
"I see we're studying hard, Ms. Granger," came a voice from behind her. Hermione turned and saw a long silvery beard. She looked up into the face of Professor Albus Dumbledore. His blue eyes seemed to twinkle and there was a slight smile on his face.
"Pro... Professor, what are you doing here?" Hermione stuttered. She realized almost immediately how impertinent her question had been. He could be wherever he wanted. It wasn't like he needed to explain himself to a first year student.
Dumbledore, however, did not seem to mind the question. "I often find that the school library is very well stocked with books on a variety of topics. I like to find new material on subjects that interest me every now and again. Sometimes even a professor, or a headmaster like myself, can learn a thing or two. What is that muggle saying: you can lead a dog to water but you can't make him learn new tricks?"
Hermione didn't bother correcting him. She was still in shock. She'd never actually seen the headmaster up close or talked to him in person and he was a little intimidating. After all, he was said to be one of the greatest wizards of the era.
Dumbledore eyed the piles of books stacked on Hermione's table. "Exams seem to have come a bit early this year, or perhaps you've decided to take your O. W. L.'s a bit early?"
Hermione smiled weakly. "Oh no, sir. I was just doing a bit of… um… research. But I haven't had any luck."
"Yes, Madam Pince told me on the way in that you've been here all day and show no signs of leaving anytime soon. She suggested that there might be something I could do to speed you along."
"Well it's kind of complicated…"
Dumbledore laughed. "My dear, I happen to be a halfway decent wizard. I think I may be of some use if you allow me."
Hermione thought about this for a moment. She didn't know how much she should tell the professor. Would he be mad at her for using a potion on a fellow student without his knowledge? She decided to at least try to get the answer she needed without telling him what had actually happened.
"A friend of mine is having chronic nightmares so he needs a sleeping potion. I tried narcoryan but it backfired."
"Ah I see, you did not let it simmer for the prescribed amount of time, so it's having the opposite effect. I've seen it happen many times. Don't worry, my dear, improperly prepared narcoryan only lasts for 24 hours."
Hermione let out a sigh of relief. Now all she had to do is mix another batch of the potion the right way.
Dumbledore sat down. "So your friend asked you for a sleeping potion for his problem?"
"Well… uh… no. I just figured this would be the best thing to help him."
"Well if I may be so bold, Ms. Granger; I don't think a potion is the best way to help your friend."
"Oh, is there a spell I could use instead?" Hermione asked eagerly.
Dumbledore laughed. "Not exactly. What your friend needs is something far more powerful than any magical solution. If he is having chronic nightmares, as you have said, it is a sign that there is something troubling him, something that he can't handle on his own. He needs someone, a true friend, to be there for him. Only that can really help him. Perhaps you can be that friend?"
For a moment, she thought the headmaster was joking, but he had a serious look in his blue eyes. "But Professor, how can I help? I don't know what I could say or do that could help him. I'm not very good with things like that," she admitted. "I'm a good witch; that's it. If I can't find a magical solution then I don't think I'm much use."
"Hermione, to be a good witch, you must learn that there are many times when magic just isn't the answer," Dumbledore said soothingly. "There are still forces out there that are far more powerful, such as friendship. You have to understand all of these things if you are going to reach your true potential."
Hermione nodded numbly and she realized for the first time that she had been going about things all wrong. She had never really tried to talk to Harry about his dreams. She'd offered him everything else except an ear to listen to his concerns. She had been too afraid that she wouldn't know what to say to him. But Dumbledore was right, what Harry really needed was a friend. She knew that Ron never really tried to talk about it with him, so it was up to her.
Madame Pince came up to the table. "Headmaster, I really must insist…"
"Yes of course, Irma. Ms. Granger and I were about to leave." Dumbledore said coolly. He stood. "If you'd like to continue your research, you can take some of these books back to your common room I'm sure."
Hermione shook her head as she stood quickly. "No sir. I don't think I'll need them, not for what I have to do."
Dumbledore smiled as Hermione hurried off towards the door. "Oh and Mrs. Granger," he called after her.
Hermione turned around just as she was about to exit. "Yes sir?"
"Tell Harry that I hope he feels better soon and that I look forward to seeing his next quidditch game."
Hermione smiled. It wasn't surprising that the headmaster had known all along.
-----
It was late when Hermione arrived in the common room after her conversation with Dumbledore. The only light was that of the slowly dying fire. It seemed that everyone had gone to bed.
Hermione wasn't tired at all. She walked over to one of the chairs facing the fire and was about to drop into it when something startled her.
"Well you're out late." Harry was sitting in the chair she was about to plop down in and she hadn't even noticed.
"Oh Harry, you scared me. Why is everyone sneaking up on me tonight?"
"Well I figured I should say something before you sat on me," Harry retorted as Hermione took another seat next to his. "Where have you been, anyway? Don't tell me you spent all this time in the library."
"Yeah, actually I did," Hermione sighed. "Still can't sleep?"
Harry shook his head. "Not really…"
They sat there silently for a moment. Then suddenly Harry asked. "Hermione is there something wrong? You've been acting really weird today. Do you want to talk about it?"
A tear ran down Hermione's face. "I can't believe this. I'm such a terrible friend. I don't take any time to try to talk to Harry about his nightmares but he's worried about me even though he's got problems of his own."
Harry finally noticed that she was crying. "Hermione, what's wrong?" he asked in shock.
"Oh Harry, it's all my fault. I wanted to help you by finding a way to end your nightmares so I made the narcoryan potion for you and I slipped it in your drink last night so you wouldn't know because I know you said you didn't want a sleeping potion but I thought it would help but it turned out that I made the potion wrong so instead of giving you dreamless sleep it made you not be able to sleep and it was totally and completely my fault and I didn't want to tell you because I knew you'd be mad at me so I spent all day at the library trying to figure out a way to reverse the potion without you knowing and all this time what I should have been doing was trying to talk to you about your dreams instead of avoiding the topic because I was afraid of not being able to say the right thing to you." Hermione started crying again. "You're such a good friend to me and I just wanted to do the same but I did it all wrong."
Harry had been friends with Hermione for several weeks and was used to her talking extremely fast when she was nervous, but he never knew what to do when she became this emotional. It took him a while to dissect everything she had just spilled out.
"Hermione," he said finally. "I know you were trying to help, and I appreciate it, but you can't just slip a sleeping potion into my drink without me knowing."
"I know… I know… It was totally and completely wrong of me, and I'm so sorry Harry. It should wear off in a couple of hours, I promise."
"Well that's good."
"Are you mad at me?" Hermione said, wiping the remaining tears off her face.
"No, just promise not to do any more magic on me without my permission."
"I promise."
"Well, I guess I should try to go to bed now." Harry stood, but Hermione stopped him.
"Wait Harry, since we're both up, maybe we could talk."
Harry sighed again. "Hermione…"
"Harry, I know it's difficult," she cut him off, "but if you just keep it bottled up, it's not going to go away. It's just going to keep eating away inside you. We're friends. We're supposed to be able to talk."
Harry sat down again. "I know, but I don't think there is anything you can really do to help me."
"I can listen."
Harry smiled. He realized he hadn't really talked to either of his friends at length about how these dreams were really affecting him. Hermione seemed like she earnestly wanted to do something to help him. She'd even gone as far as to try and sneak him a sleeping potion.
"You know, it's more than just losing my mom and dad," he started. "It's almost as if I have no family… no real identity. The only thing I really know about me is what others tell me. I wish I had someone I could really call family besides Aunt Petunia. That way I could know what my mom and dad were really like."
Hermione nodded and Harry continued. They talked well into the night, well after the fire had burned out and Hermione had replaced it with her own magical bluebell flame. When they finally headed for their separate dormitories, both Harry and Hermione felt like a great weight had been lifted from their shoulders.
Hermione pushed open the door to her room and was met with the thunderous snores of Lavender. She smiled. Things were back to normal.