Chapter 7 Resolute
Ginny excused herself from the table before everyone was finished saying that she had some more homework she needed to complete before classes tomorrow. She made her way back to her room and began preparing for her meeting with Draco. Ginny chose a light blue jumper and pulled it on along with some jeans. `I'm lucky being the only Weasley girl,' she thought. `My clothes may not be the best but at least they haven't been worn by six other people.'
Ginny brushed through her hair and added some gloss to her lips. She also sprayed a bit of perfume into the air and walked through the scented mist. Ginny surveyed herself in the mirror and thought, `All right, then.' She turned and went down to the portrait hole hoping not to meet anyone on her way to the Astronomy Tower.
Luck was with her and she took the stairs up to the tower slowly. Ginny opened the door, which creaked ever so slightly, then closed it behind her. In the far corner, she saw Draco silhouetted against the night sky as he leaned on the wall looking over the grounds. Ginny stopped several feet away from him.
"I didn't know if you would come or not." Draco said with his back still to her.
"After what I saw at lunch, I was surprised you asked me here."
"Really."
"Yes, really," Ginny tossed back at him. "What would you think if you saw me taunting you with my friends while some other boy pawed my arm? Do you expect me to believe that last night meant anything to you after what happened-what I saw at lunch?"
Draco turned his head slowly to look at her. Ginny couldn't make out his expression in the darkness but suddenly wanted to step back.
"Ginny, have you ever thought what would happen if my friends found out about…us?" Draco's voice was controlled for the moment and he slowly closed the gap between them. "I mean really think about it. Do you remember the fight in the ministry last year? Have you forgotten where my father takes his meals now and why?"
Ginny went with her instincts and took several steps back but Draco stalked even closer, his eyes piercing hers.
"Have you forgotten the Chamber of Secrets?" Draco threw at her, his voice growing rough and rising. "Have you forgotten who was responsible for you almost dying in that hole? What do you think Lucius Malfoy's response would be to our relationship? `Oh, lovely, my son has found the girl of his dreams!'…Please!"
Draco turned away and began to pace. "Do you know how much danger you're in if you're seen with me like this?" he said almost desolately. "You don't know my `friends' and family like I do. They'll sell you out with a wink if they think it'll increase their standing in Voldemort's circle. My mother and I are just trying to survive in that world."
Ginny couldn't stand it anymore. She walked forward tentatively and wrapped Draco in her arms. "Draco…I'm sorry but I don't know how to trust you-"
"Good, because I won't promise you anything and there's nothing to trust."
Ginny was silent, taken aback by the harshness of Draco's words.
"For years I've watched you…I never thought that there was any way…I've put your life in danger because I showed my feelings to you," Draco said brokenly. He shifted his hands to Ginny's arms and pulled them from around him as he stepped back, his eyes not meeting Ginny's. "This can't go any farther. I shouldn't have ever let it get to this point-I'm sorry…please forgive me."
"No."
Draco's head snapped up. "What do you mean, `No'?"
"I mean, No!" Ginny tossed back. "I'll not allow you to make this decision on your own. I will have a say in this and I don't want this to end." After a moment, Ginny added hesitantly, "I think I heard you say that you have feelings for me…is that true?"
"I shouldn't have said that."
"I don't care what you should or shouldn't have said! Is it true?"
"Yes…" Draco whispered wretchedly. "Merlin help us…yes."
Ginny wrapped her arms back around him and held on. Her world was spinning a little faster than she could maintain a balance for. "How long have you…felt this way?"
"I don't really know when I realized it." Draco pulled back a bit and sought her eyes with his. "Can you possibly have feelings like that for me?"
After a long moment, Ginny answered, "I don't know…I'm sure that I want to be with you but I'm not sure about anything beyond that right now. This has happened so quickly and, frankly, I've been dangling between hating you and…wanting you."
"I'm sorry I've had to put you through all the nasty behavior from my friends and me. I know how it must have looked to you-especially Pansy."
"So what about Pansy?" Ginny raised her eyebrows. "Next to Crabbe and Goyle, she's with you the most."
"Well…" Draco glanced away considering then sighed, "Pansy and I have been promised to each other by our families…"
"What!" Ginny gaped.
"Its something most of Voldemort's circle do in secret… trying to keep the bloodlines pure...and to maintain power. My mum was promised to my dad. It's an ongoing prison sentence for her."
Ginny continued to stare at Draco.
"Ginny, my feelings for Pansy mostly amount to disgust. But, unfortunately, she's aware of the promise and sees me as…`hers'."
Ginny shook her head as if to clear it then looked at him with raised eyebrows. "Is there anything else I should know?"
"I just want you to fully realize the dangers of being with me. As you've already experienced, my father wouldn't hesitate to have you killed if he thought it would serve his purposes. My friends wouldn't have any qualms about exposing our relationship to the wrong people if they thought it would improve their family's status with Voldemort while taking mine down a peg or two. I'm not sure I could live with myself if anything happened to you because of me…"
Ginny's eyes remained steadily on Draco's. "Do any of your friends know about us?"
"I don't think so, although sometimes I wonder if some don't suspect something after what happened at the match yesterday. Crabbe has been goading me just a bit about it. Do any of your friends know?"
"Hermione knows about the classroom and the Bludger, but nothing else. I think I can convince her we were just a passing fancy."
"What do you think your family and friends would do if they found out?"
Ginny took her time replying. "I don't really know the answer to that-well, I can guess how Ron would react." Ginny's mouth quirked into a strained smile. "But in my family, we've always been there for each other no matter what…well, except Percy…so I hope that they would be open to us, but I just don't know. I think my parents, especially my father, would go ballistic at first but then hopefully calm down after we talked."
"Well, that's something, then," Draco responded half-heartedly. "I feel like saying, `Welcome to my nightmare; glad you could make it'."
At that, Ginny pressed her lips against his and felt his respond fiercely.
"Well, that didn't seem like too much of a nightmare," Ginny smiled when the kiss had ended.
"Are you sure…?"
"Yes."
Draco's eyes were shaded with anxiety. "I'll do everything I can to protect you but we're going to have to be very careful. I'll probably have to go on acting like I have been with my friends and Pansy."
"I understand."
"Ginny, are you sure…"
"Yes, Draco, this is what I want. I'm frightened but this is worth that to me."
"Thank you," Draco breathed, resting his forehead on Ginny's.
Ginny responded by tenderly placing her lips on his. Draco pulled her close to him and drank her in.
Just then, a streak of light sliced through darkness as the tower door creaked open.
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