Birds and Bees

Hey guys, so sorry it took so long to get just this little bit out, but my writing habits are rather erratic and well…only seem to come in spurts late at night when I've had chocolate and dr. pepper for the last 3 hours. Well…I'm not giving my deadline for the next chapter but it will be the last and the more reviews I get the sooner it shall come….*nod nod* Thanks so much to the people who did review and sorry that I'm too lazy to respond to each and every one of you, but I will try to get to anyone who reviews this chapter if you be sure to leave your email address! Thanks again and enjoy(remember this chapter is really only a little filling and set-up for the end…it serves no great purpose in the life of this little fanfic except to tease you readers)

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The Birds and Bees

By: Lady Akako

Chapter 2

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“What do you mean you `didn't get through to him?'” Hermione asked bewilderedly.

“Well—I did try…” Ron tried to explain, blushing furiously. “But, Hermione…you don't understand…he doesn't know what—what—what making love is.

“Did you ask him that?” Hermione asked, on the verge of being horrified of what Ron was implying.

“Sort of,” he replied after a healthy pause. The only sound in the hallways for that moment was the click-click of the two's shoes as they headed towards the front doors of the castle.

“Sort of?” Hermione repeated, a skeptical eyebrow was raised. Hermione was beginning to doubt Ron was the one to trust with this mission.

“Well…we were on the subject and he said a few things…”

“A few things, like what?” Suspicious now, Hermione stopped and leveled Ron with a calculating stare. There was something that was making him very uncomfortable and she would be damned if she wouldn't get it out of him.

“Like…what he thought making love was,” Ron gulped. “Except…well….”

“Except well what, Ron?” Hermione almost screamed in frustration at his stuttering. “What were his exact words?” She resisted the urge to grab his shoulders and shake him. Hard.

Of course she was overlooking the fact that he towered over her with ease. It was a stretch to even come up to his upper torso for Hermione, much less effectively grab his shoulders.

There was another pause, as if Ron was trying to remember every little word Harry had said to him the night before. His face screwed upwards in though for a moment before he opened his mouth, “Well—”

“Hey, there you two are,” a voice interrupted Ron just as he began to speak. Hermione let out a small cry of frustration and turned to face the owner of the voice, upon finding it was Harry, she gave a shaky smile.

“Harry!” She said in a way of greeting, her voice sounding a bit uncertain to her ears.

His hair was as always, hopelessly ruffled, as if he had permanent bed head and his eyes were gleaming with a tired sparkle. Harry walked faster to catch up to where Ron and her had stopped, cutting off all remnants of their momentary conversation. Hermione tried to send Ron a look that they would talk later but he was too busy looking uncomfortable and staring at the wall to take much notice.

“Well…are you going to breakfast, then?” Harry asked, looking a bit confused at why Ron and Hermione had been standing in the middle of the hallway.

“Oh, yes!” Her eyes widened a bit as she remembered to stay calm while talking to Harry. Nothing could be that bad, Ron had to be exaggerating. “We were just—wondering where you were because we couldn't find you either this morning so just headed down without you. Is that okay?” She blurted out the lie with a little wince. She hated lying to Harry.

He nodded as if this cleared things up for him and offered his hand to Hermione.

“Well then, shall we go to breakfast or stand around all day?” he joked with a lopsided smile.

“We shall.” She gave him the best smile she could and took his hand easily.

He led her down the hallway a few steps before Hermione realized that Ron was still standing back in the middle of the hallway. Staring at the wall.

“Ron?” She asked in a dubious, wondering if they should be bothering him if he was that pre-occupied with what had happened the previous night.

It took a moment for her voice to even break through Ron's conscious and for him to react.

“Oh….uh yeah, I'm coming,” he coughed after a moment, nodding roughly towards Hermione. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and followed after us as Harry began walking again, tugging on my hand gently.

“Glad you could join us, mate.” Harry flashed a teasing smile back at Ron as they walked through the doors to the Great Hall.

“Yeah,” Ron mumbled as he rubbed the back of his neck, looking a bit uncomfortable.

As the three of them entered the hall several pairs of eyes followed their progress across the hall, Harry and Hermione holding hands loosely with Ron trailing slightly behind, hands once again shoved in his pockets. It was like this every day, when the trio entered the Great Hall the same students would stop to stare, as if they were exhibits in some freak museum. It wasn't exactly comforting.

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“Hermione!” Ginny hissed as Hermione walked past, balancing numerous books in her arms. It was just after classes had ended for the day, so most students were just now filtering back down to their common rooms.

Hermione was just coming to the last few flights of stairs (here's to praying they wouldn't change on her though) as she was called aside by Ginny. She winced; she had been trying to avoid Ginny all day. She still hadn't gotten out of Ron what he had been trying to tell her this morning. It was nagging at her, but what Ginny was so eager to talk to her about had bothered her a bit more. Ginny was getting a bit too excited about this little investigation.

She felt her arm being tugged on before she could protest and herself being dragged down another hallway to an empty classroom. There were only a few chairs strewn along the walls in the room besides a single, small window in the right corner that let a dim light cast itself in.

“What is so important?” Hermione sighed as Ginny pulled the door shut behind them.

“Well, obviously, our plan with Ron didn't work so well, so I figured we would need to do something else to get through to Harry, right?” Ginny said quickly, looking cat-like in her grin as she spoke.

“Ginny…I don't know if this is a good idea anymore…” Hermione said uncertainly.

“Well, good idea or not, you-re still going through with it. You want to know why? Because you never leave anything you start unfinished…even something like this. Especially if it involves Harry and this definitely involves Harry.” Ginny nodded to herself and began pacing as she spoke.

“Ginny,” Hermione groaned. This couldn't be good.

“Oh you should hear what Luna said you should do when I told her about this…” Ginny said brightly, remembering something incredibly funny obviously as she donned an amused smile again.

“You told Luna?!” Hermione gaped, thinking of the slight dislike she harbored for the Ravenclaw girl.

“Of course, don't worry, she won't tell anyone. But she did suggest something…” Ginny pressed her lips together to keep in the obviously brewing laughter.

“Do I even want to know?” Hermione slumped over to the wall to pull up a chair, fiddling with the ends of her bushy hair as she slid down to sit in the old chair.

“Well—she—uh suggested that you describe the habits of a creature called the Crumple-Horned Snorkack to Harry and that would solve all of your problems apparently.”

Hermione snorted and rolled her eyes as Ginny finally let loose the giggles that had been building up inside of her.

“You're not really helping right now, Ginny,” Hermione finally said after a moment. Her hands were still playing with the ends of her hair, as if she rolled it in her fingers long enough it would give her the answers to all of her problems at the moment.

“Hermione…what else do you want to do?” Ginny reasoned quietly. “It's not like there's a whole lot left we can do.”

Hermione lifted her eyes to meet her friends, in deep thought over this matter, nd suddenly was struck with an idea. Sure…it was a last-ditch effort and if it didn't work could cause emotional damage and scarring for life, but…well, it was really the only thing left to do.

“Ginny,” Hermione stated suddenly. “I've got an idea.”

“What is it?” Ginny asked, looking suspicious and curios at the same time at the expression on Hermione's face.

“I'm not quite sure of the details yet…but I'm going to have to do it alone.” Hermione said firmly and stood up, knocking the chair she had been perched on back against the wall again.

She strode purposely out the room without another word, leaving behind a very confused and downright curious Ginny Weasley behind her.

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okay the Crumple-Horned Snorkack comment was suggested by fenriswolf…and I might have included some other suggestions in there too without actually realizing it but I'm much too tired to make sure to give credit to everyone, so sorry.

Hope you're not too disappointed….

And now REVIEW or you'll never hear from me again!

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