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Watching You Without Me by IamHermione
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Watching You Without Me

IamHermione

A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews for the first chapter! They give me such a buzz! Like I said, this chapter will be much, much shorter. It has to be to be effective, I think.

I had some complaints about the length of the first chapter too- Just to clarify: I usually love to write really long chapters, but since this story is basically just narration, I felt it would get a bit tedious. I also thought it might make it a more emotive story. I do apologise, as I know that the longer the better, most of the time!

This is set to another song off Hounds Of Love, by Kate Bush: The Morning Fog.

Disclaimer: Please get help if you think I own this…

Please give me another natural high by reviewing! IamHermione -xxx-

The morning fog

I could have sworn that I just felt Harry kiss me. The lightest kiss imaginable. But he can't have.

For a second, I could have sworn that I could see his eyes, alight with despair. But I can't have.

I've been waiting for him to come home for a few hours now. I've been sitting in my favourite chair by the fire, reading. But I can't concentrate. My eyes won't bloody cooperate. I'm getting anxious.

He should have been home two hours ago.

I lay my hand gently on my belly. I'm four months pregnant. It's been a difficult pregnancy so far. That's why I'm at home and not at work with Harry.

I've tried to stay calm, this evening, for the baby's sake, but I know something is wrong. I can tell. Harry's my husband, and my partner in the Auror division. He would call if he were running late.

But I could have sworn he kissed me, just then…

There's a sharp tap at the door, and all of a sudden, I know what's happening. I know what's been unfolding during the evening unbeknownst to me.

Harry does not knock at the door.

Oh, God, help me!

I glance at our wedding photo on the mantelpiece, but I can't look at it. I tear my eyes away from it. I feel a sharp pain, somewhere; I don't know where. I will my feet to carry me to the door, though I can feel my distress: The baby's distress.

Oh, God, I'm losing everything!

My hand fumbles with the lock on the door, and it finally clicks open.

The door swings open and the light from outside hits me in the face so that I can hardly stand. I barely catch a glimpse of Ron's vivid hair before the light envelops him and everything around me.

And everything slows down. I feel a trickle of what I'm sure is blood flow down my leg. I feel myself hit the floor, though it doesn't hurt. I hear Ron screaming my name over and over again. Screaming with a hoarseness and desperation and a painful intensity that makes me realise that he's already been screaming this evening.

This thought shuts me down. I can only think of Harry and my Baby. All gone.

The light

Begin to bleed

Begin to breathe

Begin to speak

D'you know what?

I love you better now.

I've never known anything like this. I feel the light. It's like a breeze running over my body, lazily. Some part of me knows that there are people all around. The part of me that survives without breath, without consciousness.

I'm being torn away. Not painfully, though. No. It's like falling. Like that first inexperienced breath.

I'm going to Harry. We are going to Harry.

I am falling

Like a stone

Like a storm

Being born again

Into the sweet morning fog.

D'you know what?

I love you better now.

The light begins to retreat and the people around me come into sharper focus. And sharper again. These were not the people I expected to see. I can see…

No… I can't be…

I can see my parents standing teary-eyed beside my brothers, smiling. My fathers arm draped around my mothers shoulders, and my two brothers standing closely together; David's hand, protectively, on little Mark's shoulder: exactly how I've pictured them since they… after they were…Murdered.

I can't be…

My confusion must show. Someone offers his hand to me as I am still lying on the floor, and I take it gratefully. I look to his face. It's Harry. My heart feels like breaking with relief. I almost feel sick with emotion. He pulls me into his arms, sobbing. I cling to him, as my awareness seems to clarify. Everything seems to clarify.

All of these people around me; every single one, have been murdered by one man. But I can feel nothing but joy, and jubilation.

I look around and see I'm still in our house. My body is still lying in the doorway, my head in Ron's arms as he cries until he retches, all the time clutching Harry's wand in his hand. He was going to give it to me for the baby, obviously.

And for one second, I feel ashamed. I'm ashamed because I'm happy. I wish that I could hug him back before I have to go, and I can see that Harry feels the same. But we can't. We'll see him again, and he'll see Harry and I again.

But not yet.

I smile at him sadly as I cling to Harry. I'm going to talk to my family. I haven't seen them in a while.

I am falling

And I'd love to hold you now

I'll kiss the ground

I'll tell my mother

I'll tell my father

I'll tell my loved one

I'll tell my brothers

How much I love them

The End

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