Thanks again for the reviews. Do I have that many spelling mistakes!? I've noticed a few minor ones… I know it disrupts the read a BIT but hmm… well I'll look into it. I don't have a beta reader, and am looking for one - if you're interested add me to msn - venusphlytrap@hotmail.com hopefully this will help me with my SPELLING and my repetition problem.
Deep Within
Ginny crashed on her bed the minute she arrived back in her dormitory, detention alone with Malfoy had been taxing on her mind and her head hurt from when she had pulled herself away from him, causing him to rip her hair off her head. His presence reminded her of Tom… the dominance, the charm, the streak of evil deep within, but he wasn't Tom, there was a difference and Ginny couldn't place her finger on what it was. Draco Malfoy was cut out to be a death eater, it was a known fact, confirmed when Lucius was captured at the end of her fourth year. Ginny laughed to herself bitterly, a lot of good that did, within less than a year Azkaban had been breeched, returning faithful servants to their master's side along with the dementors.
Draco Malfoy… Ginny sighed, why she was so drawn to him she didn't know, all she knew was that there was something about him that attracted her. Whether it was because she wanted to put herself to the test again to prove that she could defy and resist the evil that she had so dismally failed to do so with Tom, or because he was mysterious, enchanting and dangerous, and she simply wanted to rebel against all that was good… to play with the dark side, either way, she would conquer this feeling.
And as she closed her eyes and gave in to her fatigue she knew, deep within she knew… both Tom and Malfoy would haunt her dreams for a long time to come, deep within she knew all she could do was bear it until her time came… that fateful day when time would finally come and take her away, if it didn't take them away from her mind beforehand.
.
The week dragged on for Ginny but her comfort was that she did not have another detention the following week, Malfoy had been quiet during her detentions and said nothing, but she felt him constantly studying her and persistently probing her mind. It vexed her beyond anything but she fought down the urge to challenge him and rose above her anger, telling herself that her forced silence wouldn't give him the satisfaction. Whatever was thrown her way, she would not break.
"Ginny, you ok?" Collin nudged her gently as they sat at the breakfast table in the Great Hall.
Ginny nodded, not taking her eyes off her plate, "Yeah, fine, just got so much work to do on top of blasted detention." She muttered.
Collin groaned, "I have complete sympathy for you Gin-bean, don't know which is worse, Malfoy or Snape."
Ginny smiled faintly, "It'll be alright, it's Friday today, going to treat myself in Hogsmead tomorrow."
"That's my girl!" Collin grinned, "It'll be just you, me and Loony though, Elle's got her date with Zabini."
Ginny closed her eyes and groaned, "Merlin save that girl, Slytherin's are all bad news!"
Collin shrugged, "From what I've heard, Zabini's fairly decent… Eleanor can take care of herself, she's a big girl now."
"Whatever, I don't trust anyone who is sorted into that forsaken house, and besides, I love Elle but she's so naïve! She sees the good in everyone, she'd probably see good in Voldemort even as he was throwing an Avada her way!" Ginny raged.
Collin shivered at the mention of The Dark Lord's unspoken name, "Ginny… I wish you wouldn't say his name you know…" Collin whined.
"Oh get over it!" Ginny spat, "Fear of a name- ah screw it!" she stopped herself as she was starting to remind herself of Hermione, talking of which, as usual Hermione, Ron and Harry sat together at the table engrossed in some highly confidential and secretive conversation over some ancient looking tattered book Hermione was showing them. Annoyed Ginny threw down her knife and fork, grabbed her bag and stormed out of the Great Hall restraining the tears that were threatening to fall.
…
"What's wrong with Ginny?" Neville asked Collin from where he sat quite near the Trio making Ron turn at the mention of his sister.
Collin shrugged and let out an exasperated sigh, "Merlin knows, Nev… got a lot on her plate I think."
Neville nodded and stared after Ginny's invisible trail, unknown to everyone Draco had also witnessed Ginny's heated exit, though unlike Collin's, Ron's and Neville's worried expressions, Draco wore a smile of satisfaction on his face and turned back to his breakfast.
"I'm worried about Ginny…" Ron muttered making Hermione stop mid-sentence and Harry to raise an eyebrow. Ron met Harry's questioning gaze and sighed, "Something's bothering her…"
"What do you mean?" Harry asked.
Ron shrugged, "I don't know…" he trailed, "Well, ever since her first year- you know, she went quiet, but then she was ok again, different… but ok, and she got better until the Ministry affair." Ron sighed, "It's just gone down hill from there really, she just has these swings - not often but she seems to go through these phases… I've been meaning to ask her about it, but haven't really found the right time…"
Hermione looked sympathetically at Ron, "Sometimes there is never a right time, or a good one, but Ron… talk to her tonight…"
Ron looked helplessly at Hermione, "You don't understand… I would, but I just don't know what to say… she's closed up on me, she always says she's "fine" every time I ask her how she is…"
Hermione smiled faintly, "Ron, you're her brother… she's got six brothers, and that's a lot to live up to… she probably just doesn't want you to see her as weak or incapable."
"But we never treated her like a girl! I mean- we always let her play quidditch with us, we never left her out of anything!" Ron said in defence of both him and Ginny.
Hermione rolled her eyes, "That's my point, Ron, she's trying to be strong because that's what you've always expected her to be… you need to show her you can be strong for her."
Ron looked positively confused but nodded despite it, "I guess... but she always goes to Bill- at least she used to, if ever we teased her too much- yeah alright," he sighed, "I'll speak to her."
Harry grinned and patted Ron on the back, "She's got detention, so by the time she gets back the common room should be all clear."
Ron nodded, "Yeah… I guess I'm just getting worried, you know- we graduate soon, and she'll be all alone."
"She'll be fine, Ron," Hermione said reassuringly, "She's got her own group of friends, I'll talk to her too if you want…"
Ron smiled meekly, "Yeah… yeah, that would be great, Hermione, thanks."
Hermione smiled at Ron and went through a series of things he could say to Ginny, neither noticed the pensive look that crossed Harry's face as his eyes lost focus on his empty plate. Now that Ron had come to mention it, Ginny had indeed changed a great deal since the day he first saw her on platform 9 ¾ almost 7 years ago. She'd been only 10 then but Harry remembered distinctively her eyes, full of wonder and innocence, radiating with childish curiosity and pureness. That air was still with her now… only it was buried in a sheet of coldness. Something was deeply disturbing Ginny, it was his duty to find out what it was… for he was probably one of the only people who understood exactly what she had gone through.
In many ways he loved Ginny like a sister because she was Ron's sister, the Weasley's were the closest thing Harry had to a proper family and he felt a great sense of duty and obligation towards them for the love and kindness they had given him, but not only that, he cared for them. Coming to think of it now Harry realised that he especially cared for Ginny… in some bizarre way Ginny reminded him of his mother and for that he was compelled to protect her at all costs.
.
The Great Hall erupted into flutters and squawks as the morning mail owls swooped in with students and teachers parcels, letters and newspaper orders. Draco's eagle owl landed gracefully in front of Draco, a sealed letter with the Malfoy crest clutched in its talons. Snatching the letter from the owl and shoving a piece of ham at the owl Draco left the Great Hall. The only people with the Malfoy crest ring were himself, his mother and his father, and since his father wasn't a fool the only person who would write would be his mother.
Walking out onto the Hogwarts grounds where he knew he would have some privacy from prying eyes and not miss his first class by returning to his room, Draco broke the seal and opened the letter.
Draco,
Be home and prepared for Christmas, your future draws closer, the time is almost upon you to become the man you were meant to be, don't fail me.
Regards,
Your mother.
Draco scrunched up the parchment and stuffed it into his robes. He knew the words were from his father in his mother's hand writing, his mother never wrote so coldly. Though he saw his mother as a fairly weak character Narcissa had been a good mother to him, the best she could be under the constant scrutiny of Lucius. The letter confirmed that his father was home, the thought infuriated Draco. Clenching his teeth and balling his fists into his robe pockets Draco headed back into the castle. This was living proof that emotions got in the way and for the first time in his life Draco realised that the taste of bile in the back of his mouth was fear. He feared for his mother because deep down he knew he loved his mother profoundly and would kill anyone who harmed her.
.
Ginny shivered, it was cold… so cold and dark, she was so alone. Looking around her Ginny found herself in the deserted girls toilet, Moaning Myrtle's toilet and realised that she had been unconsciously rocking herself with her arms wrapped around her knees that had been drawn up to her chest. Tears streamed down her face and she had no reason, no good enough reason to cry except for that she was so lonely. She had Luna… Collin… and Eleanor, and of course Ron, but he was so busy with his stuff with Harry and Hermione. She understood, she really did, she couldn't expect Ron to be there for her all the time, but right now she needed someone so badly.
Glancing around her Ginny froze and shot backwards banging her head and back into the stone wall, pain bolted through her and left a throbbing sensation at the base of her spine. Suddenly she burst out laughing, a cold and bitter laugh. She was staring at the entrance to the chamber of secrets.
"So we come to this do we, Tom…?" She laughed, "You bring me back here… WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME YOU SNAKE!?" she screamed. "What the fuck do you want from me!?" she cried, feeling a fresh wave of hot tears streaming down her face.
"Weasley." Ginny closed her eyes and laughed in a pained disbelief, which was all she needed, Malfoy invading her space, Malfoy seeing her weak and pitiful and mocking her for it.
"Everyone's looking for you, Weaslette." Malfoy said softly, his tone cold and indifferent but his voice soft, sending an almost soothing chill through her senses.
Ginny stood, not bothering to even look at Malfoy, she swayed slightly on her feet and then rushed for the sink, instantly throwing up into it. She took a few deep breaths and turned the water tap on, "Right, I'll report to McGonagall in a minute." She said, still bent over the sink.
Draco nodded, knowing that he should leave but found that his feet refused to move. Staring at her now Draco would've thought he would be satisfied, she was indeed broken, he'd been right but the only feeling that came was a longing. An alien feeling of wanting to ask if she was ok, even though it was evident she wasn't, he'd look like a fool if he asked her and it was not part of the Malfoy genetic code to act like a fool.
She stood up after having washed her face and turned to him, "Don't look at me like that, Malfoy." She hissed defensively.
Draco cocked an eyebrow at her, "And how am I looking at you, Weaslette?"
"Like you pity me, I don't need it!" Ginny sneered.
Draco was taken back, had his face revealed so much? He knew his face showed nothing, "You're mistaken if you think I'd feel anything for you, Weasley." Draco said impassively, immediately masking his face with coldness, "I'm here to make sure you get to Professor McGonagall, all the prefects were sent after you, last time you went missing-"
The side of his face stung from the slap she let fly across his cheek, cutting him off, "You have no idea what happened!" Ginny seethed her eyes and hair blazing with fire, full of contempt, "Don't you dare insult me by talking of what you know fuck all about!"
Draco smirked, "Oh but I do know, Little Weaslette, I know exactly what happened…"
Ginny bared her teeth at Malfoy, unable to stop herself as a series of hisses escaped her mouth which was followed by a loud grinding making Draco whip his head around to see where the noise was coming from- Ginny had opened the first entrance of the chamber once more but it had been sealed off. Staring back at Ginny Draco chuckled cruelly, so the Weaslette could still speak Parseltongue.
"Impressive - just like Potter I see." He muttered quietly and then turned "Come along now."
Ginny breathed heavily for a few moments and grabbed her bag off the floor - following Malfoy out of the bathroom and towards McGonagall's office in the Gryffindor tower.
When Draco knocked and was ushered to enter Ginny saw Ron already waiting, his face fearful and worried, and upon seeing his sister Ron rushed to her, "Ginny!" he said in relief as he wrapped his arms around her tightly burying his face in her hair and kissing her forehead.
McGonagall nodded to Draco in thanks and Draco bowed and left the room silently.
"Ginny, where were you?" Ron whispered in her ear.
"I - I, oh Ron…" Ginny mumbled before breaking down into tears and hugging her brother tighter to her.
For the next three hours Ginny poured her heart out to Ron with McGonagall sitting close by offering any comfort she could.
.
.
"Malfoy!" Harry shouted from down the deserted corridor making Draco turn slowly to face his nemesis.
"Potter." Draco said quietly as Harry approached him.
Harry stood before Draco, both alike in height, both opposites in features and both dangerous, "Is it true you found Ginny?"
Draco smirked, "It is." He replied coolly, Harry nodded and looked strained, Draco knew it was because he wanted to ask more questions. "She's with McGonagall and her brother. Watch her, Potter, the girl is a danger to herself. She'll be the turn of the war, mark my words." Draco said impassively though knew he was making his message clear, whether Potter got it or not, wasn't his problem. Draco turned and left Harry contemplating over what he had just said.
Draco carried on through the day with his lessons but his mind never left the little Weaslette, her anger, hatred and pain was phenomenal and at such highly intolerable levels. Today he had witness her "break" but considering what she had suffered, her "break down" had been almost the bare minimum. Christmas break was in two weeks, Draco sighed, he was to face his father for the second time since Lucius had broken out of Azkaban, not a meeting he was looking forward to, but having almost mastered the art of Occlumency from Snape, his mentor, Draco felt confident. Lucius had become colder, more insane and more ruthless than ever.
Draco finally saw the Weasley King for their last class, Potions. Draco noted that he looked sombre, withdrawn and distant, like the world was bearing down on his shoulders, not a word was passed between him and the other two members of the Trio. From beside him Blaise was slicing frog liver, Draco sighed as he turned back to copy down instructions off the black board.
"You think she'll be coming to detention tonight, Drake?" Blaise muttered from beside him.
Draco shrugged, "I doubt it." He replied quietly.
.
Draco sat waiting patiently in the Potions class room after dinner, the only noise was the great grandfather clock ticking away by Snape's desk. To Draco's surprise as the clock struck 8 the classroom door creaked open to reveal a pale and tired Ginevra Weasley in the doorway.
Without a word she closed the door and seated herself in her usual table, her quill immediately started writing. Draco sat watching her silently she look terrible but there was a lightness about her, she sat there in defiance and pride. Evidently, whatever pressure that was once upon her had been transferred to her brother and for this Draco felt a sense of relief.
"Feeling better, Weaslette?" Draco asked softly making Ginny glance up at him.
She smiled faintly, which came as a great shock to Draco, "Yes…" she nodded her eyes locked with his, "I- well, thank you." She whispered before turning back to her work.
Draco stared at her his heart soared and plummeted at the same moment, his mind baffled and bewildered though his face remained impassive. This girl - this Weasley had just touched him so deeply with two simple words, Thank you. Merlin save him to be able to live through what was in store for him, Merlin protect her sweet innocence from what was to happen to her.
It was probably in that brief moment that Draco had decided his future, two words… two simple words that had never graced his ears with such sincerity, it shook him to the core. She was indeed embedded deep within him - he knew it was too late to rectify that now and she would remain deep within for a long time to come.
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