Disclaimer: I don't think I mention one character…hahaha…so do I still need to say that I don't own Harry Potter?
I want to tell you all a story. This isn't one of those "Once upon a time" or "They lived happily ever after" kind of stories. This isn't fiction. It has no exact beginning nor does it have an end - yet. This isn't a façade. This is the innermost feelings of my soul. That's all it is. My soul, no guards no pretenses. This is me.
xxx
I'm not quite sure when it happened. I always knew that I had a crush on him. But I was too young to know what love was. I debated if it could be love so many times, and when I couldn't take the thoughts that plagued even my dreams, I did something about it. I asked a friend if she'd ever been in love. She said she had. She told me that when you thought about them, or when someone mentioned their name, you felt dizzy. You always wanted to be with them, or talk to them. And that whenever you thought about them…it felt like you were drowning.
I figured it out that day. That maybe not everything had to be as logical as I thought. That you could be in love with someone, even if it didn't seem like it were possible. To feel elated every time someone said their name. To have butterflies in your stomach at the sight of them. To be in love with a man, even if they could never love you back.
To know that it wasn't completely ridiculous to want them to hold you in their arms at night. To dream about them, and never want to wake up. To see someone kiss another person in a movie and wish that it was you and him. To know that there is such a thing as destiny and fate.
I didn't fall in love with him that day. I just let go to my hope that it couldn't be true. That it was impossible for me to fall in love. That false sense of hope that drove me to say it was only a crush…nothing more. But I was wrong…
I'm not one to be wrong. I'm always supposed to have the answers, and it frightened me to find out that some things have more power on us than books and cleverness. I gained a new sense of courage that day. I let down my guard, and I became willing to give my heart, body, and very soul to this man. It may be ludicrous, even downright stupid. But I can't ignore something that is my entire being.
Sure, I still have my books and my knowledge…but to be in love - having the urge to cry when you think about them, just because it feels like your heart will burst if you don't - is better than anything in the world.
I didn't fall in love with his looks…I fell in love with his mind and compassion. His beliefs and his interests. My soul fell in love with his soul.
I can't stop it, and I don't know if I would if I had the power to. I'm dangerously in love with this man, and I feel like I'm in a freefall. I don't know what will happen, but all I know, is that what's coming will come, and I'll meet it when it does…
Author's Note: Well, I'm not going to say that this is necessarily just Harry and Hermione…this is also me. I needed to get what I was feeling off my chest…so I wrote this…I don't care what you have to say about it…because like I said - nothing can stop love…So reviews are great…but in this `story' it isn't quite as important…
-Sarah
PS!!! - I'll update my other story once I get all the documents off my old pc…it broke
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