Chapter 13
Soul, Body, and Magic
"Harry?" said Hermione quietly, standing at the door of the Hospital Wing.
"It's all my fault," he whispered.
"No - No, Harry, of course it isn - "
"It is," Harry said firmly.
"Harry...how are you supposed to forgive yourself if you won't even give it a chase?"she said pleadingly.
"I'm done with forgiveness. Done with it! I have no one to forgive! Especially...especially myself," he breathed, not looking at her.
Hermione looked at him rather pityingly and nodded bitterly.
"Harry - ?" came Dumbledore's voice from the Hospital wing.
"He's coming, sir," said Hermione and then turned to Harry. "You might want to come. They're bringing in an expert, they think...he might be able to help."
He looked up at her, gulped, and nodded, rising from the wooden bench that stood outside of the dormitory. He followed her inside the room where he found Madam Pomfrey tending to Matt in one of the hospital beds and Dumbledore in deep conversation with Lupin, Percy, Bill, and Mad-Eye Moody, Mrs. Weasley standing to the side, her hands intertwined and crested at her chest.
Hermione walked forward toward the group and beckoned Harry after her, but he merely slumped slightly and began to pace his steps, gazing at the floor with his hands in his pockets. When he finally reached Dumbledore and the others, he looked up only slightly, but, just then, the doors of the Hospital Wing flung open and an elderly person walked in, very quickly, his hands inside of his robes, and glided toward them in a very brisk manner.
"Bill! How have you been?" said the old man, whose wrinkles of skin laid atop the other on his bald head. He was a black wizard and very short in size, wearing robes of deep silk purple.
"Just fine, Sir Safari, and you?" Bill had suddenly straightened up and his voice sounded a bit more mature. He reminded Harry of how Percy would act whenever he was in the company of Mr. Crouch.
"Fine, as always. Although I must say that I am now grieving over Nicolas' death more than ever. I could really use some of his help right about now," sighed the wizard, smiling at Harry and the others, who were all staring at him.
"I know, sir," said Bill, nodding his head. "We are all in regret."
"This is Safari Makinagi, Harry. He is an expert in the Eternal Spells and was also a very good friend of Nicolas Flamel," said Dumbledore, gesturing his hand to the man.
"Ah, expert shmexpert. I just know a thing or two," said Safari, brushing away the comment.
"Mr. Makinagi - ?" Harry began.
"Oh no, Mr. Makinagi is my father. Call me Safari." He grinned.
"Er, right - Safari, do you think that he is going to be all right?"
"Well, let's take a look see," said Safari.
He brushed the company aside and made his way through toward the bed on which Matt rested. He slouched down toward him and squinted his eyes, making his face even more wrinkled than before, and examined his face, also lifting his arm and dropping it again, as well as attempting to shake him awake.
"Well," he finally said. "He's paralyzed."
"W-We know that," said Harry tentatively.
"Hmm," said Safari. "Well then you know just about everything!"
"What?!" said Harry. Dumbledore merely smirked. "What about a cure? Will he ever wake up? Is he going to be all right at all?"
Safari examined Harry with utmost curiosity and then said, "You're that Potter boy, aren't you? Hmm. Yes, Nicolas often spoke about you."
"He - he spoke about me? When?"
He stared at Harry even more intensely now. "He mentioned a thing or two or three...or ninety seven."
Harry looked at him, confused. On his opposite end, however, he saw Hermione's eyes widen. Had he said something?
Safari blinked. "Right. Well, as for the cure, may I recommend aerated gelatin potion?"
"Aerated gelatin? What's that?" asked Percy.
"Airborne jellyfish," said Safari simply.
Harry's mouth opened in astonishment. "You're kidding!" he said.
Madam Pomfrey laughed and Percy raised his eyebrows. Bill, however, seemed rather amused at his response.
"There is no such thing as airborne jellyfish," said the nurse, laughing more heartedly than ever.
"Oh! Huh. Is that so?" said Safari, as if taken aback by this information. "Well, then, I suppose that my work here is done..."
"But - " said Harry anxiously.
"Come Dumbledore," said Safari. "I've traveled a long way and I am not leaving England until I have had a decent cup of tea!"
Safari and Dumbledore had turned to leave when Harry shouted, "Wait!" after them.
They both turned around.
"Yes, Harry?" said Dumbldore.
Harry opened his mouth hopelessly, not knowing what to say. He looked at the two of them, whom both had their eyebrows raised and were smiling, and shook his head.
"Nothing," said Harry.
Dumbledore and Safari turned around and continued to walk out of the Hospital Wing, still in deep conversation.
Harry stood there, dumbstruck. The last hope that he had was gone, like a joke. Safari didn't even know what he was talking about. What if Matt were to die? Would Harry go to Azkaban? Wait - Azkaban was gone... Would they find some other way to sustain him? But it was only an accident! He hadn't meant to do it...but he was the leader of the D.A...he was responsible...
He imagined meeting Mr. and Mrs. Thompson just like the Diggories, only, this time, it was completely his faut...Matt would be dead...and Harry was the murderer...just like Voldemort.
"Potter?"
He suddenly jumped as he felt a rough hand place itself on his shoulder. He turned to see Mad-Eye looking down at him.
"You all right, son?"
Harry nodded, half-heartily.
"Listen - I've got to tell you something..." he led his away from the others and into one of the corners of the dormitory. Lowering his voice, Moody spoke, "I know Safari. I was trained by him to become an auror and Bill worked with him in Egypt as well. Taught him a thing or two. Listen, Potter, Safari knows what he's talking about. He's a very wise man. He'll tell you everything you need to know and more; things you never imagined that someone who met you for the first time would ever know about you. You've got to go and speak to him. Right now, I'll take you to Dumbledore's office, where he'll talk to you. Don't lose hope, Potter. It's not over yet."
Harry looked up at him, questioningly, but Moody began to push him out of the Hospital Wing, watching the rest of them, who seemed to be conversing amongst themselves, and began to walk quickly toward the Headmaster's office. Harry didn't know if he should say anything, but followed the clunking of his wooden leg and his ragged grey cloak with a spring in his step. Perhaps Safari had said what he said to draw away attention. Perhaps he knew something more...
Harry's spirits soared, but he decided not to get his hopes up...
As they reached the stone gargoyle that guarded the office, Harry looked at Mad-Eye, watching for a sign of reassurance, but he merely said the password and began walking up the stone steps that revealed themselves in a spiral beyond the statue. Harry followed him upstairs until he met him holding the door open and beckoning him inside with one hand. As Harry walked into the office, he saw Dumbledore sitting behind his desk, drinking tea, with Safari to the side, both turning their heads toward Harry. He turned around to see if Moody would stay with him, but the door had already shut itself and he was gone.
"Harry," said Dumbledore, acknowledging his presence, "would you like a seat?" He waved his wand and a chair appeared out of thin air, toward which Harry walked hesitantly, sitting down.
"Well then," said Safari. "I suppose you'd be wanting to know about your friend."
Harry's mouth opened slightly and he nodded.
Safari sighed. "Let's see. I don't know how to explain this too well, but I will try my best," he said, taking a sip of his tea.
"I just want to know if he's going to live or not - " he suddenly blurted out.
"I'm getting to that," said Safari.
"Couldn't you just - "
"No, I cannot just tell you because it takes more than a simple `yes' or `no' to understand this situation."
Harry sighed impatiently, but decided to not interrupt.
"You've got to imagine this...We both have a soul and a body, just like Muggorthians - er - Muggles, if you prefer. It's hard to imagine, but, for wizards and witches, there is a layer of magic between the soul and body. When the soul is separated from the body, the magic vanishes. It's gone forever. You have to really understand death to see this. This magic is what is often used to sustain a ghost spirit or enter the world of Hades, or the next Realm. You might not understand this right now, Harry, but I must explain before I can tell you about Matt."
Harry nodded, his eyebrows furrowed.
"Now, when Muggles die, they do not have a layer of magic to lose. So it is much easier for them to enter the Realm of Death. In other words, it is harder for a magical being to die because they simply have to lose their magic first in order to become vulnerable to death. Now, the Veil of Hades that was destroyed by Ms. Lovegood is a gateway that holds many secrets for us. You have to understand, Harry, that this is something that Voldemort knows not. He has attempted to find a way to avoid death and yet he knows not how it works, either. Now, as a body passes through the veil, it will lose it's magic. The body enters the next Realm as well, but it is no longer able to be part of the soul. It is useless. The spirit abandons the body and joins the other spirits in the Realm beyond. There are just so many things to understand about death that I cannot even begin. But this I must explain. As you read in the book about the Secret of Secrets, Harry, your guess was that it is the secret that you posses, is it not?"
Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing, but nodded his head once more.
"And you were right. However, because you know about the steps to the prophesy, it has also ignited emotions in you that will often be uncontrollable. Although you felt no anger towards Matt, you have to see that your anger was directed to Peter Pettigrew, although he was not even in the same room. This anger can even arise for Lord Voldemort, but he does not have to be near you. That is why it is so dangerous for your emotions to run high. That is why Albus did not favor that Severus was to tell you about his death. I am afraid that it is, if fact, better that you know about this, but the difficulty of it is that you need to learn how to control those emotions.
"Now, when Matt was hit with that curse, his soul wavered on his body. You have to imagine it now only being slightly attached to him. Now, Matt is still alive, you don't have to worry about that, and he shall not die, simply because the Spell that you performed was directed onto an animal. It was the fact that Matt had the magic to link his soul to his body even stronger than those who do not that saved him. You do know that animals do not have souls, unless they are Animalgi, do you not? Also, had you directed the spell to a Muggle, it would not have had that much of an effect either. Had you directed your spell to a witch or wizard, it might have caused more damage to the body. Now, Harry, I have to warn you about the Eternal Spells - do not fool around with them. You, especially, cannot toy with such serious powers. Do you hear me? Avoid the Eternal Spells for now. You, for one, are one of the few who would be very skilled at mastering them, even at their highest peaks, but I must ask you to not do such a thing for now. Avoid them. For now, I want you to concentrate on the emotion that you felt when you fired the Avada Kedavra at the rat, which hit Mr. Thomspon. Go on."
"Now?" said Harry, bemused.
"Yes," said Safari simply, watching him.
Harry closed his eyes and tried to bring back the memory, no matter how much he did not want to. He remembered the frustration that he felt toward the shouted Killing Curses. He thought of Pettigrew and Dumbledore...he wanted nothing more than to see Wormtail die...it would be over...he didn't want to deal with it any longer....Sirius had died because of this....Peter has to die...Voldmort would be murdered....this was it...his hate was so strong that he could not remember ever feeling so vengeful..
There was a bright flash of light and Harry opened his eyes, breathing deeply. He could feel sweat accumulating on his forehead. Both Dumbledore and Safari were watching his with frowns on their elderly faces.
"How was that?" asked Safari said, gloomily.
"Horrible," said Harry, since that was the only word he could think of.
"To Voldemort, Harry," said Dumbledore, speaking for the first time since Harry's visit, "it is one of the most pleasurable things simply because he does not know how to experience better emotions."
Safari seemed to be in deep thought for a moment and then finally asked, "Do you perhaps now see how Voldemort managed to achieve a phase so close to immortality?"
Harry looked at him and shook his head.
"He developed a link of magic so strong, binding his soul to his body - "
"Voldemort has no soul," said Harry, bitterly.
"You will be surprised, Harry," said Dumbldore, "how much of Tom Riddle there is left in Voldemort."
Harry raised an eyebrow. "What do you - ?"
"As I was saying," Safari continued, "he developed a link so strong that it was practically unrepeatable...until you came in..."
"What?"
"Yes," said Safari. "When Voldemort attempted to kill you, the curse rebounded because of your mother's sacrifice and separated his body from his soul. His body was gone and his soul had nearly passed onto the next Realm. All that remained of Voldemort was the magic..."
"That's a lie!" said Harry, standing up furiously. "How could his soul have passed onto the next Realm when - "
"One cannot live as the other survives," said Dumbledore simply.
Harry was breathing deeply. "But - but how can - ?"
"Because the magic was so strong that he had developed," said Safari, "it was a part of him. It was Voldemort. Tom Riddle died and he was unable to return to full life without him. He was an inch from absolute death. When he used his father's bone and servants flesh, as well as your blood, he was born again. Harry, when Voldemort passed some of his powers to you on the night that he was almost destroyed, a part of Tom Riddle was left in you. That part of him returned on the night that he gained your blood. If Tom Riddle had returned from his diary, he would have brought Voldemort to his highest peak because he would be not only reunited with his ultimate soul, but he would also increase the power that bound his body with his spirit. However, now, he also has your mother's blood, which means that - " Safari stopped, looking at Harry, meaningfully, "- it means that he may now be killed if the Mortality Spell is performed."
"Mortality Spell? What - but how? How would that make him - ?"
"Because the protection of your mother that she gave you, Harry, is a part of the magic that she was. It is, in its entirety, a part of her. Now that she is a part of Voldemort, her link to you enables a bond between you and Voldemort. And not the kind of bond that you had before through your scar. This bond enables you to see inside of him. And that is how you knew about his emotions, Harry. Right now, it has been temporarily dimmed because you have not mastered reaching that part of Voldemort. Like I said, once the Mortality Spell is performed, it will be much easier for you to overcome Voldemort's power and his soul. At that point, you will be in absolute awareness of his weaknesses and the strengths that you need to overcome him. You need....time..."
"So let me get this straight," said Harry, exasperated, "When Voldemort tried to kill me, his body was gone and his soul practically went into the next Realm. However, a part of Riddle went into me?"
"That's right," said Safari.
"And - and as my mother saved me, a part of her went into me as well?"
"Yes."
"Then - then the part of Voldemort that was still alive was only the magic that had bound his soul to his body?"
"Right. But you notice that he began to regain a body as Peter helped him make special potions, although they did not succeed in bringing him back to power. They simply gave him a cover that he could use temporarily as a sanctuary."
"And - and when he returned, he got his body from - from Wormtail, his father, and me. And - and as he did so, a part of Tom and my mother went back into him?"
"Yes. But you still have your mother with you, Harry. Her protection still lingers with you. As does a part of Tom."
"So I can defeat Voldemort if he is mortal enough to die?"
Safari raised his eyebrows. When he didn't respond, Harry continued.
"I mean, that way, I will be able to understand how to defeat him because of that protection.... Because of the love that my mother left in me.... He would be mortal.... He has - he has an ounce of love. But - but he still needs humanity.... That's how he needs to become mortal. That's - that's the only way I can kill him...." said Harry, grasping at words.
"I'm glad you understand, Harry," said Safari. "Not many people would understand something so difficult."
Harry looked up at him, his heart racing.
"Now, I'm afraid that I must leave you. My deed has been accomplished. Thank you for the tea, Dumbledore," said Safari, not nearly as merrily as when he had first arrived. He stood up, his silvery purple cloak behind him, and strolled over to the entrance.
Just as he was about to leave, Harry said, "Sir?"
Safari turned and said, "Yes?"
"Are you an Afrenthologist?"
He smiled meekly and said, "Yes," slowly.
"Could I ask you one more question, then?"
"You may," said Safari.
"If - if I die, will I be able to see Sirius and my parents again?"
Safari's smile faded and he came up to him. "You will not die, my dear boy, until your time comes. But...yes, they will wait for you," he said and, turning for the last time, left through the office door.
Harry looked at Dumbledore at the verge of tears and shook his head, walking toward the door and exiting after Safari.
*****
Days past after Harry had last spoken to Dumbledore and Safari and he avoided speaking to anyone after that point. Matt had still spent his time in the Hospital Wing, but recent reports from Madam Pomfrey ensured him that he was now responding to her every now and then.
Harry had spent his time in complete isolation, away from Ron, Hermione, and the others, until he witnessed something one day that drew his attention.
He watches as Hermione was drawn to the side in the hallway by Madam Hooch. She looked around, seemingly checking for signs of anyone who could overhear, and said something to her. Hermione nodded and, also, looking around, left the scene.
Harry, bewildered, caught up with Hermione and asked, "What was that all about?"
Startled, Hermione gasped and said, "Harry! You scared me! Don't do that again! Oh - that - that was nothing. She just...wanted me to - to - um - nothing. Never mind."
Harry raised his eyebrows, but noticed that Hermione avoided meeting his eyes.
"So how have you been getting along?" she finally asked, looking up at him. "You haven't spoken to any of us. Most importantly, to me." Hermione stopped walking.
Harry stopped as well and turned to face her.
"It's not something I can explain," he said.
"I know," she said in a small voice. Harry watched as tears formed in her eyes. His heart pounded when she finally took his hand and said, "Come with me."
"Hermione - " he began.
"Just - please, Harry," she whispered.
Frowning, he looked around, and then nodded.
She smiled slightly and led him toward the lake.
"I want you to talk to me, Harry. Recently I've just been feeling like we're so far apart! It's like we're not even friends. Ron keeps saying that he doesn't even know you any more. He's - he's afraid. And - and, frankly, so am I."
Harry looked at her and saw that tears had already began to stream down her cheeks.
He took a breath said, "Look, this isn't my fault."
"I know it's not, Harry, but how are we supposed to understand you if you won't let us? If you just - just keep pushing us away - it's just not going to work! Can't you understand that? We love you!"
"I - I love you too, but I - I can't do this. I - I have to be alone. I have to understand this myself first. It's - It's just too much to handle sometimes."
"I know, Harry," she said quietly, walking up to him and pressing her fingers to his face, "but if you could just understand that we want to be a part of it - a part of you! It would make things so much easier this way! If only you had someone you could depend on - you don't understand how much that counts for!"
She searched his eyes for an answer, but then bit her lip, turning her head away.
She looked back at him and said, "Could you just tell me that you need me? I just need to know that I have a purpose! I want to mean something!"
"Hermione, you mean everything to me, but I have to figure this out on my own - "
"There you go again! It's always on your own! How can you take it like that! When I cannot even imagine being without you! Harry, would you just please - "
She stopped as Harry caught her chin with his hand and leaned toward her.
"I love you," he whispered.
Hermione nodded, her eyes still swimming in tears.
Her eyes closed as Harry pulled her toward him until their lips touched.
Harry and Hermione stayed out on the lake until the sun set and began to walk back to the Gryffindor common room just as night was about to fall.
Harry said "Goodnight" to Hermione, grinning, and decided to turn in early, walking over to his four-poster and flipping through his trunk, where he found the two-way mirror.
Sighing, he called into it, "Cilia Potter."
The woman momentarily appeared in the mirror, smiling at him.
"Hello, Harry," she said.
"Hi, Grandma," said Harry.
"How've you been?"
"Fine," Harry lied, but quickly changed the subject. " Listen, I - I just wanted to ask you about something. Have you ever felt like - like you're going through the worst time but all you want to do is go through it alone?"
"Oh no, Harry," she replied, looking saddened. "I could never go alone through my hard times. It's too difficult to do it alone. No matter how much you might think that you have a handle on things, you never understand how much easier it would be if you had someone there going through it with you."
"But what if this is something that I can't figure out myself first? How can I explain it to someone who wants to help if I don't know what it is myself?"
"Harry, that is a difficult question, but the only answer to it lies within your heart. You must decide the answer to that yourself. For example, you know Fleur?"
"Fleur Delacour? Yeah."
"Well, when I was still staying in the lighthouse, before the attack, she came to consult me about something."
"What?" said Harry, curiously.
"Yes. As much as Fleur seems to be the most controlled person, she is quite insecure. As the war started, she told me that a lot of her friends had began to abandon her. She told me that her mother was having a hard time with her job; not many people would trust part-veelas either. Knowing me for what I was, Fleur came to me for guidance. She told me that people had begun to doubt her word. They had become more and more aware of her in a negative way. She asked me how I got thought it. She needed advice...badly. She said that if she couldn't do something about it soon, she would go mad! She was not used to not being socially accepted!"
"So what did you tell her?" Harry asked.
"Well...I told her that it is not possible to control the opinion of people. You may try to change, but the problem is that people have such a high fear of everything, especially during these times, that it is very insecure to try to prove yourself otherwise simply because they will think that you are defending yourself. You have to be who you are. You have to put your trust in the people around you and, hopefully, they will trust you in return."
"So what you're saying is that I have to figure this out with them? Even if I don't understand it myself?"
"Exactly, Harry. This way, even if you're not sure of the answer, they will help you find it and the experience will link you together. It is not an easy thing to accept, but the truth is, that if you keep telling people that you cannot do something with them because you have to do it firstly for yourself, they will begin to think that a majority of what you must do or even of what you are is isolated. It is a negative thing to coup yourself up from those that you love. As long as they can be a part of the pain that you're going through, they will be much closer to you, no matter the good or bad times."
"Thanks, Grandma," said Harry, unsure if her answer would help him. "So did Fleur listen to you?"
"Well, I wouldn't know, but I sure hope so. It really is a shame that such an intelligent and beautiful girl such as her would land herself in such a terrible situation. I hate what people do at times like these. Instead of uniting they try to separate into four different corners of the world! It is always this that leads to the loss in battle. If only they could understand...things would be so different."
"That's kind of like what the Sorting Hat told us."
"The what - oh, yes. I loved that hat. It actually wrote a song about me once."
"Really?" said Harry, amused.
"Well, I guess you could say that he wrote it more because of me than for me. See, when I came to Hogwarts, people didn't really react too well as soon as they found out what I was. The next year, the hat warned the school that it would not be a wise deal to try to make enemies with people who could easily become your friends and he mentioned some things about accepting vampires, werewolves, and...banshees. It was actually quite funny. Well, for me in the least. I also remember that Remus boy. He was a very good friend of James but he had such a hard time finding a job. Poor boy. We did everything we could to help his parents. As a matter of fact, your grandfather and I helped breed the Whopping Willow."
"What?"
"Yeah," she laughed. "It was quite fun, but it put up a nasty fight."
Harry nodded. After a moment of silence, he finally asked, "Can you tell me about the Primorisian War?"
"Of course, dear. What do you want to know?"
"Well, how long did it last?"
She sighed. "Quite some time. Have you ever heard of World War I and World War II?"
"Yeah," said Harry.
"Well, the Primorisian War began even before the first World War and continued still after the second."
"But that's quite a period of time!" said Harry.
"That's what scared me. It was. But all the same, that is how long it lasted."
Harry looked confused. "But then when did you leave? I though that you told me that my parents had decided to stay because they knew about the prophecy when you left? It couldn't have been told that long before my birth, could it?"
"Oh, I didn't leave until the later part of the war. You see, Harry, the war lasted for nearly a life time, but everyone thought that they could handle it. Eventually, things got out of hand. Yes, they were still capturing Death Eaters, but that wasn't enough. No one knew how to stop it. It was as if for every Death Eater that they would catch, it would result in a entire new league of them. It was unstoppable. People from all over the world had flooded into Europe under secrecy and spy organizations to aid Voldemort in the conquering of Europe. It was perhaps the most powerful war amongst magicians since the Trojan War. Of course, I wasn't alive at the time, so I really couldn't tell you. Anyway, people decided to grab at whatever they could. Any bit of anything at all that they could grasp at, they would, and that's where Emily Finnigan came back in. Being a part of the Ministry, as she was, she decided to take advantage of the hectic period and brought up the brilliant idea of getting rid of me. So, there you have it, the war had been going on for years, and suddenly they suspect an innocent old woman because she's part-banshee. Of course, it all makes sense," said Cilia sarcastically. "But I don't blame them. It was as if looking for hope. They thought they would find it when they tracked me down. They were quite wrong, of course, but it somehow made them feel better that they could still have control over some things in the least.
"It was a miracle that Minie and I managed to stay alive. So many of those that I had known from my time had - just - gone! Emily had done quite a job. She managed to have me banished from my country, separated from my family, and return to only find most of them dead."
Tears were forming in her eyes and Harry could tell that she didn't want to continue on the subject.
"Do you - how long do you think this war is going to last, Grandma?"
"To tell the truth, it won't be long. I have hunch that it won't be long at all," she mumbled.
"Why?"
She looked up at him, the tears swelling in her eyes. "I have a feeling...I always do...the end of the Maneosioan War will come sooner than we expect."
Harry nodded and, before long, wished Cilia "Goodnight," and fell asleep. Once again, his nightmares about Voldemort continued, but, this time, they were aided by his mother who roamed his head along with Tom. He kept receiving flashes of the Chamber of Secrets and watching Ginny die as the rest of her powers would be transferred into Riddle. Sirius kept falling beyond the veil and a bright flash of green light came before Harry's eyes just as he woke up, realizing that it was time for him to speak with Ron and Hermione because the scar on his forehead had already began to prickle and it would not be long until he would have to speak with Matt's parents about what was going to happen to their son.
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