Four Little Words

Chapter Sixteen

There was a knock on Remus' door. He barely heard it through the storm raging outside, but he heard it nevertheless. Putting down his cup of tea, he walked to the door, pausing for a minute to look out his peephole. Everyone was stressed to be more cautious from now on.

It was only Lily, who was looking quite deformed in the convex lense of his peephole. She had one of her thick quilts wrapped around her and she looked like she had not gotten to sleep yet, even though it was past midnight. Remus unlocked the door and opened it, giving her an encouraging smile.

"Hi," he said, quietly.

"I was...lonely," Lily admitted, blushing. "Can I stay here tonight?"

"Of course," Remus nodded, moving out of the way so that she could walk in. "What's the matter?"

"I was thinking about Marlene..." Lily admitted.

"Do you want some tea? It's positively ghastly outside," Remus says, looking out the window at the rain.

"Yes please...." Lily nodded. "I just...I'm afraid to be alone tonight. I hate funerals."

"They aren't pleasant things," Remus said from the kitchen. "They remind us of our own mortality, and force us to ponder things that we would much rather not ponder."

"I don't like the smell of flowers..." Lily said, quietly. "Or at least, all of those...they remind me of...my family's funeral."

Remus returned with the tea and a sympathetic face. "Unfortunately, smell is the strongest sense tied to memory."

"Unfortunately," Lily nodded, taking a deep whiff of her tea. "I can't tell you how many times James walks by and...well..."

Remus nodded in understanding and Lily made a disgusted face. "I can't believe this...it's the day of someone's funeral and I'm talking about my ex-boyfriend."

"Do you want to talk about Marlene?" Remus offered quietly.

"A bit...it might help...do you...know how she died?" Lily asked. "I only heard bits and pieces."

Remus sat back and scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Sirius went to clean up...he told me that a few Death Eaters had hidden out on Marlene's boat, I'm sure you know it well."

Lily nodded, a ghost of a smile on her face.

"And, of course, Marlene and her family couldn't get away, Anti-apparating charms on the boat and all...Sirius said there was evidence of a struggle, stray spell marks and things of that nature. I can't imagine Marlene going without a fight."

"Me neither..."

"They must have been able to disarm her fairly quickly, because her wand was found in the water quite a distance away. I'm assuming that they caught her off guard at first so she wouldn't be too much of a threat. She might have used her-"

"Remus?"

"Hm?"

"Can we stop talking about it now?" Lily whispered.

"Sorry," Remus sipped his tea. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I don't know...just not how she died...I don't like thinking about it," she shook her head. "Was that her...brother who gave the eulogy?"

Remus nodded. "His wife was on the boat."

"She was in the white casket, right?" Lily asked.

"I believe so, yes."

"Oliver was in a white casket," Lily remarked, quietly. She put the teacup to her lips and then lowered it. "You wouldn't happen to have any thing strong to put in here, would you?"

"I have a bit of goblin water Sirius left over here one day, if you'd like a few drops."

"How about a bit more than a few drops?"

"Trust me, Lily, you only need a few drops," Remus said, getting up and going to the kitchen. He returned with a small bottle and poured two drops into Lily's drink. She tentatively sipped and then began coughing violently.

"Strong...stuff..." she swallowed.

"Yes, I'm afraid I don't rather have a taste for it," he placed the bottle on the table beside him. "Feeling any better?"

"A bit," Lily shifted. "Don't tell anyone...but I'm afraid to be home alone right now."

"Understandable," Remus nodded. "It's quite a scary time when someone close to you is the victim."

"You don't think that they're going to start...individually targeting us, do you?" Lily asked.

"Hard to say," he said, after a few minutes deliberation. "I suppose it could be said that Marlene was a threat. She was older, a mentor to both you and Emmeline, and quite the dueler. Or it could be said that Marlene set herself up; being on a boat with no escape route. There really is no way to tell what they're doing..."

"I'm ready to forgive him," Lily said, suddenly. "I want him back."

"I think that's a wise decision," Remus said, knowing exactly what she was talking about. "After all, there's no guarantee that either of you will be here tomorrow. Do you want to spend the rest of your life wishing that you'd gotten married?"

She shook her head quickly. "I think I'll go see him tomorrow...."

"That's good."

"Can I stay here tonight?"

"Of course," Remus nodded, standing. "I'll set up the couch for you?"

She nodded, smiling gratefully. "One of these days, Remus, I'm going to make up for all the times I've slept on your couch."

"You already have," he said, quietly.

Lily awoke to the smell of coffee the next morning. Remus was looking out the window thoughtfully and sipping a steaming cup. She sat up and ran a hand through her hair, blinking sleepily in the morning light.

"Feeling better?" Remus asked, walking over to sit down next to her on the couch.

"A lot better, thank you," Lily rubbed her eyes and leaned her head on his shoulder. "I want to talk to James."

Remus put his arm around her, smiling. "Good idea. Save us all a big deal of trouble."

"Then maybe I'll ask him to marry me."

He chuckled. "You know, maybe if you'd done that in the first place, we wouldn't be in this mess we're in now..."

She wrapped her arms around his middle and smiled against his shoulder. "It's a pity you aren't a girl, Remus..."

"Why's that?" he snorted.

"Because you could be my maid of honor."

"How about one of the groomsmen?"

"I suppose. Though James once said he wanted blue groomsmen suits with silver ties."

"Yes, we discussed this before," Remus rolled his eyes. "Sirius and I both agreed that you would not allow it."

"You're damn right!" Lily said, sitting up a bit. "That would be the ugliest wedding I have ever heard of!"

"Come now Lily, you can't strip a man of his entire Quidditch personality."

"All right, all right..." she sat back against him again. "Black robes with blue and silver ties, and I suppose the bridesmaid dresses can be light blue."

"Compromise is a wondrous thing," Remus chuckled. Lily looked up and rubbed his cheek.

"You need to shave."

"Probably."

"You know, James hates you and Sirius for the ability to grow a full beard," Lily played with his cheek some more. "He can grow patches, and that's about it."

"Are you aware how much you talk about him?" Remus pointed out.

"Yes," Lily sighed. "But it's ok, because we're going to be engaged by this afternoon whether he likes it or not."

Pop!

Lily and Remus looked up from their nestled spot on the couch. James took one look at them and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"The hell is going on here!?"

"James!" Lily sat up, realizing what it looked like. "What are you doing here?"

"You bloody traitor!" James whirled on Remus. "I thought I could trust you to not touch my girl, but here you are-"

"Your girl?!" Lily hissed. "I thought we had broken up, Potter!" Remus groaned into his hands. And she had just been talking about marrying him two seconds prior.

"Well...my ex-girl I guess," he sniffed. "But you ought to have more tact than to go after Lily, Remus!"

"We weren't doing anything!" Lily hissed. "And lay off of him!"

"You, I expected it from!" He pointed at Lily. "But Remus! You're supposed to be my best mate!"

"I am your best mate, and I wasn't doing anything with her," Remus said, tiredly. "In fact we were just talking about-"

"I know what I saw, you two were practically snogging!" James sputtered.

"We were not snogging, Potter!" Lily shrieked. "And you have no room to talk! Shagging another girl when we were on a simple break!"

"So you admit that you were doing something!" James pointed.

Remus, who had not moved from the couch, was staring at them with a tired expression on his face and was wondering why such a couple that was so obviously made for each other was having such difficulties getting together.

"I think you need to get your abnormally bad eyes checked, Potter, we weren't snogging! We were sitting there, talking about how much of a git you are!"

"Actually-" Remus tried to interrupt.

"Well that's just peachy because Padfoot and I were discussing how much of a nag you are!"

"Nag?!" Lily shrieked. "Nag?!"

"Oi..." Remus tried half-heartedly.

"Yes, nag!" James nods.

"Y-You...!" Lily sputtered, unable to find words after that hit her.

"Ok, I think this has gone far enough," Remus stood up finally.

"Keep out of this, werewolf-" James spat without thinking. Remus' eyes widened in shock and Lily let out a gasp of indignation.

"What did you just say?" Lily hissed, dangerously.

"I-I said, werewolf!" James said, letting his mouth run away with him again.

"How dare you!" Lily sputtered, as if she was the one insulted. "Remus has done nothing wrong!"

"N-Nothing you say!" James continued, feeling hurt that she'd side with Remus and not him. "Well, how come he's been so secretive lately!"

"Secretive!?" Lily gasped. "What the hell do you mean, secretive?!"

"He barely ever tells us what's going on in his life anymore!" James pointed at him. Remus rolled his eyes.

"There's nothing that you don't know about in my life, because I haven't had time for a life," he said, annoyed. "I've been too busy trying to keep the two of you straight."

"Well, then why did I get an official l-letter from the Ministry the other day to keep tabs on you! In case you do anything suspicious!"

Lily's face was seemingly permanently shocked. Remus was just staring at him, his skin the color of paper.

"A-And now here you are, shacking up with my- with Lily!" James said. "What's next? Are you going to switch sides on us too?"

"I'd never-" Remus started, but Lily reached back and landed the loudest slap to James' cheek, it made him see stars.

"You...just get the...hell out of here!" she said, breathing deeply. "How can you talk that way to your friend of all people!"

"But-"

"I cannot believe I even thought of marrying you! You are no different from those dark wizards, James Potter! I don't know what happened to the man I love, but you sure as hell aren't him!!" she shrieked, feeling a well of tears spring up from within her.

James, shocked from her screeching, stared at her dumbly as she continued to seethe. Remus, seeing that Lily was about to maul James, made a quick motion signaling to James that it would be in his best interest to leave quickly.

"F-Fine then!" he stuttered, Disapparating.

When James was gone, Lily began to sob. Remus, who was quite sure that he should have been the one upset, rushed forward to calm her down.

"I cannot believe him!" Lily whispered in to his shoulder. "Talking to you like that, and he's supposed to be your friend."

"You...really shouldn't be this upset over it..." Remus said, slowly. "It's not that big of a deal..."

"But don't you see?" Lily looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "He has exactly the same prejudices against you that all of those dark wizards have against me-"

"He has a valid reason though...." Remus says, still shocked that she got this upset. "You aren't libel to turn into a monster..." Then again, you did really let him have it a few minutes ago...

"It doesn't matter, Remus, he's your friend..." she wiped her eyes. "And I refuse to be in love with any person who treats their friends that way, especially nowadays..."

He sighed. She wasn't going to get off of this tangent for a while. And things were looking so promising.

"You hear me right now, Remus Lupin," she said, sternly. "Don't you switch sides on us, all right?"

"I'm not going to-"

"I don't care what Potter, or Black, or anybody says, you are a good person," Lily wiped her eyes again and sniffed. "I'll see you at work."

And with that, she Disapparated.

Remus fell down into his couch, intensely frustrated. He looked up into the ceiling and wondered aloud, "Why? Why are you making this difficult for everyone else who sees that they belong together?!"