A/N: For my earlier readers, there is something that I want to clear up before you begin reading this next chapter. I believe, and I know that it bothered me when I first wrote it since I had speculated quite a bit about placing that sentence, that I had earlier stated in a paragraph that Hermione had debated how hard it would be to win Harry over because he had told her that he didn't feel the same way about her. If you remember that line, please scratch it out of your heads now. Ready? Okay, now you can proceed. Lol.
Chapter 3 - Day one: Invitations
It was raining.
Only days before had Harry returned from battling Voldemort, and Hermione wanted to do anything but see him again because that night, the night that he had left, she had told him how she felt. No, not just the "I love you," but everything. She told him how her world depended on him, how she would break if he didn't return. But she broke sooner.
He told her to stop, that he couldn't take it because they should protect their friendship, and each other. But Hermione couldn't understand, she would never understand. He told her that he had a reason, but she didn't believe that. She would never believe that. She had lived in the hope that he never knew the way that she cared for him, but he did. She knew he did. She knew that he had planned what to say to her in case her feelings ever came out. And they did. And he still had the gut to say them....
However, what made her even more unnerved was the fact that he had the gut to come back and tell her otherwise.
"Hermione, please..." Harry pleaded, grabbing her wrist.
"I never want to see you again, Harry, I thought I made that clear! I never want to see you, speak to you, anything, so just let me GO!" she screamed, not meeting his eyes. She wanted to hit him, hurt him, do something to make him feel the same pain that he had caused her.
"No, you don't understand - "
"Understand? That's right, Harry, I will never understand, and I'm not sure that I want to right now," said Hermione, now looking straight at him. "You know what you did, don't you? Well, do you? You broke my heart! You stabbed it several times first, and then, you broke it into a million pieces that will never come back. Never! You lost me, Harry Potter. Forever." Hermione knew that she had streams of tears running down her face as she had said each word with so much confidence that she was sure that she could never go back on them.
"But I love you!"
She had began to storm away and stopped dead in her tracks just as Harry called out to her. She turned her head and said, "What?" silently.
"I said...I'm in love with you, Hermione," Harry replied, taking a step toward her.
For a moment in time, Hermione wanted to do anything but believe those words, but the heart, the very feeling with which he had said them could not make her think that for the world, and so she laughed. "You know, it's funny, because now it's my turn, Harry....It's too late. You just had to wait, didn't you? Lesson learned here, huh?...Goodbye, Harry."
"But, Hermione - "
She stopped once again.
"Once a heart is broken, those pieces get lost in the wind, Harry. You can't have them back."
And, with that, she Dissapperated to a place where she knew he would not follow.
***
Hermione had just Apparated in her flat and took a heavy sigh as she slumped herself onto her couch.
"What have I done?" she said, sniffing. "Harry hates me," she said to herself. "I can't just walk up to him and try to get him to fall in love with me again! That's insane. He would never forgive me for what I did....then again, I promised myself that I would never forgive him either..."
She sighed again, shaking her head. "This is crazy," she noted. "I think...I have finally gone insane! Well, done, Granger! Just what you need - "
"Talking to ourselves, are we?" came a voice.
"You really need to stop doing that, Ginny," said Hermione, laughing, as she looked at her through the magical mirror that resided on her wall. It was her way of communicating with Ginny since she had a similar one at her flat.
"You all right?" she asked her.
"Yeah...can't complain," said Hermione. "Oh, wait! Yes I can! I've just been fooled into making the one man I despise fall in love with me!" she said in a sarcastic tone.
Ginny shook her head silently. "You don't despise him," she said quietly.
"Yes I do," Hermione said miserably.
"No," said Ginny, "you don't. It's that kind of attitude that won't win him back. Tell me, Hermione, do you still love him?"
She looked up at Ginny, feeling absolutely empty inside. "I had ceased loving Harry Potter the day that he died and I began to hate him the day he came back."
"Then why did you agree to do this?" asked Ginny, raising her eyebrows.
Hermione though about this for a moment and then said, "Because I'm a pride-sucking idiot who can't see what is worse for her own good."
Ginny laughed. "I don't think that's it."
"Then what is it?" asked Hermione.
"I think you're still in love with him."
"And Luna still thinks that the Ministry has an army of heliopaths, but that's not entirely true either."
"Hermione - " she protested.
"Look, we've been over this before, Ginny. Nothing - and I mean nothing - will make me feel that way about him again!" she said, pulling her legs up onto the couch and covering them with a blanket as she summoned herself a butterbeer with her wand.
"You are such a hopeless case," said Ginny, exasperated.
"Better a hopeless case than a lovesick fool," said Hermione, taking a drink from her bottle.
Ginny watched Hermione for a minute and then said, "Well, the others have told me to remind you that this is day one, so you technically have to go and see him."
"Oh, so that's why you called, eh? You're their little messenger now, are you?" said Hermione.
"Of course I'm not, Hermione! Look, I'm just saying, do something, okay? You don't have that much time - "
"I have a century," said Hermione.
"What is wrong with you!" Ginny yelled. "Hermione, this is not like you! I feel like I'm talking to a wall instead of you, I mean, come on! I know you love this man, no matter how much you try to hide it, and, you know what, it is your pride that keeps you from admitting it."
Hermione looked up at her and said, "I think I've heard enough, Ginny" bitterly.
She looked back at her, rather hurt at the words. "Right...right...well, um...I guess I'll - I'll talk to you later, Hermione. Er...tell me - tell me how it went."
"You and the rest of the world!" said Hermione raising her butterbeer to her, and she saw Ginny disappear in the mirror, shaking her head.
"She has no idea," Hermione said. "She has no idea what I've been through, what he's put me through. Love him? I can't love him again. Ever. Maybe I can just tell Harry about this whole thing and he'd come along just to help, but that would be cheating. No, I'm never one to cheat. When have I even considered cheating?...Ginny's right. This isn't me. Now, I've gotta get up, pull myself together, and do something about this! I have to win Harry back no matter what and I don't care what it takes!"
Hermione put her butterbeer down on her coffee table and took off the blanket that covered her as she stood up and walked over to the table where she kept all of her paperwork. She took out a parchment and a quill, dipped it in some ink, and began to write.
Dear Harry,
I am so lost right now. I do not know what has gotten into me. I really need you. I'm sorry for the way that I have been acting toward you lately and, well, most of the time anyway. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't think I can say that enough. You have been such a great friend to me for so many years and I have just been wasting away our friendship, which is the opposite of what I should be doing. If you can ever forgive me, look me up. If not, well, I would perfectly understand.
Love from,
Hermione
She read over the letter and felt as if every word had come out so naturally that she didn't feel as if she needed to fix a thing. She didn't even know where that had come from, but she held the letter tightly to her chest before placing it in an envelope and tying it to her owl, sending her out the window to find him as soon as possible.
But what if he decided not to forgive her? What if this didn't work? She needed to see him. Yes, that was it. Hermione grabbed her cloak and Dissaperated from the building.
***
Harry had just arrived minutes before to his flat. It was a great apartment that he very much admired since it was right next to the ocean and on about the hundredth floor.
He took off his cloak and went to wash his hands just to pass by the balcony and see that it was raining.
Every time it rained it reminded him of that dreadful day. One of the two most dreadful days in his life. The first was when he heard Hermione tell him that she loved him and he had to turn her down, and the second was when he told her how he felt and she walked out of his life forever. Not that he still didn't see Hermione every so often, but their conversations were so limited that is was as if he never knew her at all.
If he could only have another chance...he would set things right. He would tell her he loved her and would never even go back on his word. And it was not that he did not feel that way. Harry had loved her forever and had not stopped, but it's not like that made any difference. Hermione hated him and he knew it. No matter how much he had considered going up to her flat and knocking on her door, telling her that all he wanted to do was spend the rest of his life with her, he knew that she would slam the door in his face. And he deserved it. After what he had said and done to her, he deserved every bit of it.
Just then, he could have sworn that he heard a soft knock on his own door. He hesitated, shaking his head awake, thinking that it was probably just his imagination. Harry had just began to walk away as there it came again. The soft knock.
He turned around and slowly approached his door. As he opened it, he felt his jaw loosen slightly as he saw a very wet Hermione standing there in what was almost a puddle and meekly smiling at him.
"Hi," she said, breathlessly.
"Hi," said Harry, his mouth still slightly agape.
"Er..." said Hermione, "you know, I have no idea what I'm doing here. I was just...walking and I thought I'd, you know, drop by. I should...probably go..."
"No!" said Harry, reaching a hand out to her as she turned to leave. She raised her eyebrow.
"I mean...you should - you should stay," he said.
"Really?" said Hermione, smiling.
"Definitely," said Harry, nodding his head and standing aside so that she could walk in.
Hermione grinned and stepped into Harry's apartment, looking around as she was intrigued by how tall the ceiling was, since she had never really had the chance to see it. She had absolutely refused to come when he had invited her and everyone else just as he had bought the place.
"This place is nice," Hermione said to him. "It reminds me of something, I just can't remember what...."
"Probably Hogwarts," said Harry, taking her wet cloak off her and hanging it on the coat rack with his wand. "That's why I decided to buy it. It sort of reminded me of the Gryffindor common room."
"Oh," said Hermione. "Yeah, I guess it sort of does."
There was an awkward silence as Harry waited while Hermione kept looking around.
"Harry - "
"Hermione - "
They had both spoken at the same time and smiled to themselves. "You first," said Harry.
"Harry, you know, I don't even have any idea why I'm here. It's just that...I miss what we used to have. I miss our friendship...and I want it back..."
Harry's smile slightly fell. She wanted to be friends again. But...nothing more.
"Right," said Harry, grinning. "I...I think so too."
"You do?" said Hermione, looking pleased.
"Yeah, I mean, it's been pretty crazy what we've been putting ourselves through all because of - well - "
"Yeah," said Hermione quickly, looking away. She walked over and sat on his couch, patting the cushion next to her so that he would too sit down. Harry walked over and took the seat.
"Did you get my letter, by any chance?" Hermione asked, wrapping her arms around her, still slightly wet from the rain.
"No, I - I haven't had the chance to check my mail - are you cold?"
"Er - "
"I'm being stupid," said Harry. "Of course you are, you're wet. Hold on just a minute - "
Harry summoned a warm blanket and wrapped it around Hermione.
"There," he said. "Better?"
"Better than ever," Hermione whispered. There was a quick moment where both of them stared into each other's eyes and then looked away as Hermione tightened the blanket around her and sniffed.
"Now, let me get that letter - " said Harry.
"Oh, no, Harry, I'd rather you - " said Hermione, but he had already gotten up and walked over to where she guessed his owl post regularly arrived and picked up the letters. Hermione fumbled with the blanket as she watched him pick one out that she guessed was from herself and read it intensely. Hermione bit her lip as she watched his mouth slightly open while reading the letter as he walked back to sit on the same spot on the couch. He finished reading and finally looked up at her.
"Do you - d'you really mean this?"
"Every word," said Hermione.
Harry looked at her, uncertain. "I don't get it, one day, on the train, you don't want to speak to me, and then the next you -"
"It's like I said, Harry," said Hermione gently. "I'm sick of us being like this and I'm sorry. I am just so sorry because it shouldn't be this way. It just has been, what, five years that we've been this way toward each other?"
"Five years, seven months, and ten days," said Harry quietly.
"What?" said Hermione.
"Er, nothing," said Harry, who put the letter down on the table and looked at her. "So you need me, huh?" he said, grinning
Hermione laughed. "Well, some of the time. I mean, you are still Harry and there's a plenty lot of things that I find rather excessive about you sometimes."
"Like what?" he said.
Hermione grinned. "Well," she said, tilting he head to the side, "like the fact that you have the tendency of choosing Quidditch over a civilized conversation, or the fact that you hate to lose no matter what, or the number of women that hang on to you every day of the week, or - "
"All right, Miss Smarty pants, I think we've heard enough. What about you? You're not that innocent nor perfect either."
"And that's a bad thing?" said Hermione, smirking.
Harry laughed. "All right, all right, all right. I get it. You came here to pester me, did you?"
"No, actually, I came to ask you something," said Hermione.
Harry gave a quizzical look. "Shoot."
"Ginny was going to go to Ireland to look for that caterer and Luna was going to Prussia soon with Ron so I'd really have no one to hang out with for the next, what, ten days? You think it'd be all right if I hang with you?" she said sweetly.
Harry looked at her, surprised. "Well...yeah...that'd be fine, I mean, Neville and Ron, actually, will be with them, so yeah. Yeah, that's...great actually. I guess we won't be all by our lonesome selves after all."
"I guess not," said Hermione, smiling. She tightened the blanket around her and turned her head to Harry once more. "Do you - Harry, do you - I know this is a stupid question, but do you ever...still, you know - think about that - that day when I - when I told you - ?"
"The day I told you that I loved you?" said Harry morbidly.
"Yeah," said Hermione, feeling a lump in her throat.
"All the time," said Harry truthfully, looking at the fireplace.
"You - you do?" said Hermione, nervously.
"Yeah, I do," Harry whispered.
"Oh," said Hermione. She seemed satisfied with the answer, and yet there was something that was really bothering her about it.
"I'm sorry," she said.
Harry looked at her. "So am I," he said.
Hermione smiled tentatively and suddenly sprang up. "You know, I think I'd better go. I, er - you probably have things to do and I'm just taking up your time - "
"Hermione, you know that you could never take up my time," said Harry, standing up after her, "and even if you did, I'd prefer it to anything else."
"Anything?" said Hermione, grinning.
"Just about," said Harry with a smile.
"Did you want to have dinner, then?" said Hermione. "I'm kind of hungry seeing as I didn't have lunch."
"Sounds great," said Harry enthusiastically. "My treat?"
"I was hoping it would be," said Hermione, smiling.
Harry looked at Hermione and then asked, "Er, are you dried off and everything?"
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," said Hermione, beaming.
"All right, then, where d'you wanna go?"
"Well, I was thinking we'd go someplace simple, so - "
"What, is this like a date?" said Harry, laughing.
"I prefer to call it a friendship reunion," said Hermione.
"Whatever floats your boat," said Harry. "So where to?"
"Well," said Hermione. "How about we head down to the Bucking Broom and grab something there?"
"Whatever you wish," said Harry, opening the door. "Oh, I almost forgot - we can Apparate."
"You always did have your wits about you, Harry."
Harry and Hermione both laughed and, within seconds, Apparated in the restaurant.
"Oh, it has been so long since I've been here," said Hermione, taking in the smell of the firewisky, spices, and fried food.
"Yeah, me too," said Harry in a small voice.
"Liar," Hermione accused him, smiling. "You've probably been here about ten times in the past several weeks."
"All right, so maybe I've gone here a couple of times, but not that much, I swear!" said Harry as they made their way toward a table and Harry pulled a chair out for Hermione.
"You really are a ladies' man, aren't you, Potter?" she said as she took her seat.
"Well, I try," said Harry, grinning.
Hermione laughed. "So, Hermione, you've been asking me questions all night. Mind if I ask you some this time?"
"Sure," said Hermione, sounding curios.
"All right," said Harry, scooting up his chair to the table. "When was the last time you were in love?"
Hermione's grin fell. "Oh...uh...well," she said. "I - you know, it just, it's hard to...tell..."
"Yeah, I know. Stupid question," said Harry.
"No, it's not," Hermione said quickly, reaching across the table and taking his hand. "It's not - it's - I just...don't know."
"Yeah...yeah, me neither," said Harry, staring at her hand, which was gently placed on top of his own. For some reason, he felt as if it gave off a certain heat that was only so comforting that it made the temperature of his own feel just right.
Hermione saw that Harry was staring at her hand which was on top of his own, and slowly removed it.
She smiled as he met her eye and said, "We should probably order our food."
"Yeah," said Harry in a low whisper. He was just realizing how beautiful she looked that night. She wasn't wearing any make up and her hair was slightly frizzy from being wet from the rain, but the way that the light hit her just as she was sitting across the table from Harry made it absolutely perfect.
"Harry?" she asked, looking curios, "Aren't you listening? What did you want to eat and drink?"
"Oh, right," said Harry. "Er, I'll have a butterbeer and...a steak, probably."
"All right," said Hermione, who's food was already on her plate. Moment's later, Harry's food appeared on his plate as well.
"So what have you bee up to for a while?" she asked him, breaking her bread and buttering it.
"Well," said Harry, "I have been in the Auror's watch, as you know. Recently, I needed to clear some things up in a conflict with some Muggles. I believe the reign of the Death Eaters hadn't stopped with Voldemort and, you know, they now call themselves the Reform of Death. Kind of pathetic if you think about it."
"I do know that much," said Hermione. "But, I mean, what's been happening with your life?"
"Just about the same thing that has been happening with yours, which is nothing," said Harry, looking at her.
Hermione raised her eyebrows. "You really think nothing has happened in my life?"
"Well?"
"I'll just tell you, Potter, that you don't know me half of the way you think you do," said Hermione.
"Then I suppose that this is precisely the reason that we're taking this time to find out," Harry said and began to cut his steak.
After Harry and Hermione had finished eating their food and having a rather lengthy conversation that they had been lacking for a long while, they walked back to Hermione's place instead of Apparating so that they would have the chance to talk a bit more and have a chance to get out in the night air.
As they reached the door to her apartment, Harry and Hermione stopped and turned to face each other so that they could say good night.
"That was really fun," said Hermione. "I missed that."
"So did I," said Harry, looking into her eyes, which were shinning.
She still loves me...
Harry watched as Hermione's eyes closed slowly and his followed suit.
He was leaning closer and closer until he could feel her breath on his face and he couldn't remember ever feeling so dizzy in his life when he suddenly rmembered something that hit him like a bludger. I dunno, mate, sounds pretty risky. You know those two, they've never lost to anything.
Harry immediately turned his head toward her ear and whispered, "Good night, Hermione."
She revealed a questioning look at him as he drew back, but all he did was smile.
Hermione felt like kicking Harry. She was right there! She could have kissed him! She would have kissed him but - urgh! What was that?
"Good night, Harry," said Hermione and walked inside her appartment.
Harry watched the door close and felt his leg twitch angrily to hit the wall. Nine more days? That was day one and he nearly cracked. Harry turned to leave, reminding himself that he had to be more careful. Hermione was his friend and it had to stay that way. He just hoped that he had a good explanation for what almost happened between the two of them.
Inside her appartment, Hermione smiled to herself. "So we didn't kiss. Big deal! This is only the first day, after all. He'll be back in love with me before I even know it!"
She walked over to the mirror that resided on her wall and watched her reflection, which seemed both very tiered and confused. "But then," she thought, "what would that make me?"
***
Back at his flat, Harry walked over to pick up the blanket which Hermione had used to warm herself when she had been soaked from the rain. Harry lifted it from the cushion and smelled the sweet scent that it had captured and suddenly reminded himself to snap out of it when he realized something. The coat which humg on his coat rack was not his own, but Hermione's, which meant that she must have put his on by accident when they were leaving, which also meant that she had possesion of the Quidditch finals tickets.
"Oh, no," said Harry. He had promised to give Luna back the tickets that morning since her and Ron were leaving to Prussia, but were still going to Apparate over to the stadium the night of the game. Which meant that he had to remind himself to call Hermione extra early the next morning so that she would remember to grab the four tickets for him.
"I just have to control myself for a few days. No problem," Harry said to himself, remembering the past couple of hours and sinking his face into his hands.
***
"Looks like I'm going to need to take things up a notch," said Hermione, holding the tickets I one hand and tapping them against the other.
A/N: For those of you who have not yet watched the movie, and for those of you who have, it's good to refresh your memories. On the first date, it seems as if everything pretty much goes by plan for both of them. They both think that they'll be able to pull off whatever they're scheming and...it sort of goes downhill from there.
And another thing that I wanted to make sure to clear up was that Hermione doesn't really believe that she has feelings for Harry yet. So far, she's just in this to get him into a relationship with her and bring him to the wedding. So, yeah, she is using him, but that would be understandable considering the fact that she is still a bit angry for what he did to her.
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