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Pendragon: The King Stag
Prologue
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October 31st, 1981
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May it be an evening star shines down upon you
May it be when darkness falls your heart will be true
You walk a lonely road, oh how far you are from home
Darkness has come, believe and you will find your way
Darkness has gone, a promise lives within you now
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The pale full moon was the only light in the sky. The starless gloom was foreboding and chilling. A cold wind kept putting out the candles in the living room, and that was starting to bother Lily.
She had never complained about moving to Godric's Hollow. Why would she? The house was beautiful; there was a big garden where Harry, her one-year-old son, could play… And, above all, this was where her husband wanted to live: his ancestors had built the mansion hundreds of years ago.
They had already decided to search for a house when James' mother had asked them to move in. The house was far too big for Mrs. Potter to inhabit alone; she had already been very sick, and had died shortly afterwards, without meeting her grandson.
James had asked Lily if she wanted to leave. Perhaps that would have been better, but it had been clear that he wanted to stay, and so she agreed. Lily had never regretted that decision. After all, the house had been very useful for hiding. Their Secret Keeper, Peter Pettigrew, brought them food every week… They could continue living this way forever.
Lily and James tried very hard not to think about the future, but it was impossible. What was going to happen next? How long would they have to live like this? And what if Voldemort gained even more power, what then? Would they have to hide forever because of that damned prophecy? Would -
Lily shook her head firmly, determined to stop thinking about it. Dumbledore and Nalune had thought it best for them to go into hiding. The Lady had Seen clearly that the child in the prophecy was Harry, not the Longbottom boy… Unfortunately. But of course that was true - Frank and Alice were wonderful, but their son couldn't possibly compete with the child of the Pendragon.
She lit a candle again with her wand, but once more the wind put it out. Irritated, she twirled her wand and lit all the candles in the room at once. Afterwards, she shut the window.
The candlelight surrounded her with an unearthly glow. Lily tied her dark auburn hair in an untidy knot and fixed her slightly dishevelled robes. Why did it still feel strange to wear wizard robes every day, even after all these years? Why did she still miss Avalon, even though she didn't regret her sacrifices for James? And why did she bother to ask herself these same questions every single day?
The window opened by itself again, and Lily absentmindedly muttered a spell to lock it. The wind howled outside, and she heard a distant boom of thunder.
It was probably going to rain… But then again, it had rained heavily every single Samhain - or Hallowe'en, whatever - in the past eleven years. Nature hadn't found anything to celebrate on the beginning of the new magical year. Once more, the weather was the same… Nothing had changed.
Lily heard footsteps behind her, but didn't turn. They were alone now - Harry was sound asleep in his room. He was a good kid, who didn't wake up often in the middle of the night. This, of course, was very useful - it would have been nearly impossible for them to perform any rituals if Harry were awake.
James' lips brushed against her neck lightly, sending shivers down her spine.
"It's almost midnight, love," he said softly. "We should really get started."
Obediently, Lily knelt on the floor, staring at a candle, waiting…
"What can you See?"
The moment the words left his lips Lily shut her eyes, feeling the familiar rush of heat, cold and many other unexplainable sensations overwhelm her.
James remained silent, waiting.
Lily's mind suddenly expanded beyond the visible world; she saw familiar faces, places, memories... and then, unexpectedly, there was the void. In the dark, shadows surrounded her, and she felt cold, cold, cold…
"Nothing," she replied faintly. "I can't see anything, James."
He frowned, worried. James could sense her panic - he could tell she was very frightened. Oh Mother, why? They'd tried so hard to protect their home, to shield their son from evil… Had it all been in vain?
"Something's gone dreadfully wrong," she continued. "But I can't -"
"You have to. Try harder, Lily. Tell me, what happened?"
No, no harm could come to them here. It was impossible. Lily and James were hiding from Voldemort in a place no one but Peter Pettigrew could find… And he would never betray them; he had been one of their best friends during and after Hogwarts. So something had probably happened to someone else. Dumbledore, Nalune, Sirius… who?
The darkness was almost too much for Lily to bear. It was so sad, so deep, so oppressing… Why couldn't she See? Mother, what could possibly be so terrible -
Suddenly, she saw a stag. Not a normal stag, but James, the King Stag, in Dragon Isle - a lifetime ago… The serpents on his wrists seemed to come to life as he swore the oath to protect the land… Oh, no, no, not that…
Lily started shaking uncontrollably and she reached for James' hand. It felt cold... Already… Oh, Ceridwen, no, please, not so soon… Now she knew why she had Seen nothing at first - the Goddess had been trying to spare her the anticipated suffering… But it was better this way.
She opened her eyes.
"It's time," Lily said, tears running down her cheeks. "You're sworn to protect this land; it's time to fulfil your oath."
James knelt in front of Lily and looked into her eyes for what seemed like an eternity.
Lily's icy fingers brushed the blue tattoo on his wrist, and, for a moment, she regained the serene poise of an Avalon priestess. "Your life is not yours anymore… You knew this could happen someday."
He bowed his head slightly, finding the strange calmness that had just taken him over very unnatural. Maybe he hadn't accepted the truth yet… His time had come, he could feel it. This life had been so brief… Yet it had been worth it. Lily, Harry, Dumbledore, and Nalune were there to testify that he had not lived in vain.
Lily finally broke down and began to sob. "No, James, please don't leave us. We… I can't, I couldn't possibly live on without you."
She buried her head in his chest and he hugged her tightly. "You have to. You have to run, Lil… Harry needs you."
"I can't, I can't… Not without you, love, please -"
All of a sudden, they heard voices and footsteps coming from the living room. Lily jumped, but James continued in his remarkably calm state. He wiped her tears tenderly, and in his eyes she could see his pity for Harry and herself.
But he showed no fear of his destiny. He had never been afraid… he wouldn't be this time, either.
"Peter's here," he told her. "And I have to go see him."
Lily shook her head. "You can't… It's not Peter! Go, James… Escape before it's too late, please…"
He stood. She could see his intense aura with her waking eyes. It was pointless to discuss any further. The reason James had been born was the completion of this task: to save Britannia from Voldemort, or die trying.
Die trying. Die trying. No, James couldn't die. He just - he couldn't
But he would. It was Harry who would have to survive, and she had to get him out of there now. James was going to die to buy them some time.
Lily sobered up immediately and stood, resolute. There would be a time for mourning, and a time for despair, but it was not now.
"He will get some of your powers," she remarked calmly. "Unless you do something about that before - before you face him."
She couldn't say 'before you die'. It was much too inconceivable… She couldn't start crying again… She wouldn't start crying again, and make this any harder for James.
James nodded, and kissed her one last time. "Don't cry, baby."
Lily blinked away the tears. "I love you."
"It won't be too long before we meet again… Dierna."
A shiver ran down her back. In a distant memory, she remembered sending James to his death, just like the present… Except that back then her name had been Dierna… And she had been Lady of the Lake; she hadn't given up her calling for him.
And yet he had died for Britain, too. She hadn't helped him then, and she wouldn't be able to help him now. The most she could do was give him her blessing.
James went to Harry's room.
"Lily, take Harry and go!" James commanded as he reappeared, running to the living room.
Lily clutched her necklace - the one he'd given her when he'd proposed, with the hieroglyph for 'forever' carved in the moonstone pendant - and watched him powerlessly, as he ran to his almost certain death. No, certain. Certain death. He was not 'the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord'… That was his son, that one-year-old baby right in front of her, fragile, innocent, helpless…
"It's him! Go!"
Her eyes stung with the tears she refused to cry. She had to be strong. She had to fulfil James' last wish.
His dying wish…
"Run! I'll hold him off!"
Lily could hear the muttered incantations and several objects breaking, shattered by the spells. She didn't have to pay attention to know which hexes were being used; she could feel James' mind within hers, she could hear his thoughts - their minds were one again…
Harry was sitting down very quietly. He looked up at Lily and she saw that his eyes, so much like her own, were wide with fear and sadness.
So he, too, knew what was happening. Well, of course he did. One couldn't expect the son of the Pendragon and a Seer to be any less than extraordinarily perceptive…
With the sharp intuition of a higher-level priestess (or was it the Sight? Maybe even just common sense), Lily suddenly realised she wouldn't be able to Apparate away. She didn't even bother to try. Of course Voldemort hadn't made such a primary mistake.
She was going to die, too. And so was Harry.
Harry stood and looked at her.
"Mama…"
And then it dawned on her. Obviously - obviously. The bloody prophecy wasn't the only reason Voldemort had targeted them. He had found out something about Avalon, and so he had decided to kill the Pendragon, an eventual threat. That was why he had stricken on Samhain, to get a part of James' powers… Although the wizarding world tended to ignore ancient magic - Voldemort included -, the Dark Lord knew it existed, and that it was very powerful.
Lily's death was of no use to him. In fact, maybe Voldemort wanted to keep her alive due to her knowledge about -
A loud thud. A shrill laugh. And then her world came tumbling down.
That was it. James was dead. And the Dark Lord was laughing… How could he? How could he have killed him? How could James have died?
James, her worst enemy, the most annoying boy she'd ever met… Her consort, her lover, her husband, the father of her child, the love of her life, her mùirn beatha dàn… Dead.
James couldn't have died… How could she live on? How could she survive? She would have died for him gladly… Yet he was dead, and she was alive.
What had she done to deserve this? Why couldn't she have died instead, why had she been cursed with life when he was gone?
The tides, the tides had turned… Turned against her. The whole world was against her, even Ceridwen. Why had She taken him? How could She expect Lily to live without him?
Lily had given up everything for him: her calling, her job, her life… Was this why he had been taken away from her so soon? Because she had given up on Ceridwen's service for him?
The turning of the Wheel, the start of this new year had brought her nothing but pain… No wonder it was about to rain. The Pendragon had just been killed; Light had been temporarily eclipsed by Darkness… For how long? Was Harry really the one who was going to change this, the one who would tip the balance to the side of Light?
Lily heard Voldemort's footsteps. He was coming to get her now… She was defenceless…
Had James died in vain?
Lily stared at Harry. He looked so much like James, so much… It wasn't fair, he had to survive… With a sigh, she allowed the Sight to overwhelm her one last time -
Harry stood on the shore, calling for the Avalon barge. She could've easily mistaken him for James, if it weren't for his bright green eyes. He wore wizard robes, and his wrists were bare… But Lily was almost sure that he too would become the Pendragon someday…
So Harry would survive… But how?
Voldemort entered the room at last. Lily looked him in the face defiantly. They'd met a few times before, and she had never feared him. He was a force of Darkness, and it was darkness that had to fear even the slightest beacon of light, not the other way around.
He pointed his wand at Harry.
Lily immediately saw that he was planning to let her live… 'to tell the tale', so to speak. Still holding on to her pendant, she knew beyond any doubt that she was meant to stop him now… She couldn't let him carry on -
"Not Harry, please, not Harry!" she cried, placing herself between the crib and the Dark Lord.
"Stand aside, you silly girl! Stand aside, now…"
Tears were running down Lily's cheeks. She was powerless; she didn't even have her wand… And yet Harry would survive somehow…
"Not Harry, please! No, take me, kill me instead -" she pleaded.
Lily would have no reason to live if Harry died… She wouldn't be able to continue… Why didn't he just kill her and get it over and done with?
Harry would survive; Harry had to survive… Her head was throbbing; saving her son was all she could think about. There had to be a way…
"Not Harry, please… Have mercy…"
Voldemort laughed, and the sinister sound made Lily realise that he could sense to an extent that she actually wanted to die… So he, of course, wouldn't kill her.
"Please… I'll do anything!"
Harry was going to survive somehow… There had to be a way…
"Stand aside," he repeated, very irritated now. "Stand aside, girl."
Harry moved slightly to the side; Lily didn't notice, but Voldemort did.
She didn't care about her grief anymore. All she knew was that Harry had to survive; he had to live on to fight another day. And he would, somehow he would… And it was Lily's job to make that happen… How, how, how?
Her last task, the last time she'd interfere with destiny and use the Sight to change the ways of Men…
"Avada Kedavra!" cried the Dark Lord, pointing his wand at the baby.
In a split second, Lily realised what had happened and threw herself in front of the green light spurting from Voldemort's wand.
She had died for him… There was no magic greater than Love…
'Harry will survive' was Lily's last thought…
And then everything became dark.
It didn't rain on October 31st, 1981, unlike the previous ten Samhains. Something had changed.
The sudden bright light could have blinded her, but it didn't. Instead, the warm glow was welcome and comforting. Where was she? Lily could tell she was lying down, but she couldn't see the surroundings - there was far too much light.
Suddenly, a pair of smiling blue eyes looked into hers. Lily recognised him instantly, even though he was now blonde and much taller. She smiled and took his hand.
"Hello, love," said James - or whatever his name was now -, helping her up.
"We're -"
He nodded. "See? I told you we'd meet again soon."
James embraced her and wiped the silent tears from her cheeks.
"No crying here," he said, kissing the tip of her nose.
Lily smiled, and noticed her hair was now long and dark. Also, she seemed to be shorter - maybe James wasn't that much taller after all. And she… she was faerie-folk, with slightly tan skin and hazel eyes. So that was why dealing with ancient magic was so easy for her - she was a priestess from the very first time she had been born.
She looked around, recognising her surroundings at last: they were inside the barge that led to Avalon. But there were no mists here; the sun shone brightly, and she could see the Tor clearly, even though they were still far from Ynis Witrim.
"We're going to Avalon?"
He grinned. "For a short while. But not the Avalon we have known for the past few years… The eternal Avalon, the real Avalon… When you were Caillean, you tried to make the Isle of Apples look more like it is on this plane, remember? There are some people from the old crowd we'll meet there."
Lily turned to look at him curiously. "And you learned all this in the few minutes you spent here without me?"
"Well, time doesn't really exist here… But you know all this too… You just haven't gotten used to this reality yet, Isarma - or Cassandra, Akhesanaton, Nefertari… Which name do you prefer, love?"
"Isarma is fine. I miss Atlantis, and worshipping the Rising Sun with you in the Temple of Light… But I miss Avalon more… Probably because I have been a priestess there for the last few thousands of years," she said, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.
He smiled. "My heart was also bound to Avalon many lifetimes ago… Returning to the Temple of Light is a permanent longing we will never fulfil. Atlantis is lost forever, even though there is a replica of it in this plane. Rajasta - was his name Dumbledore last time? - built it last time with us, remember?"
"Yes, of course… I had never quite realised we knew them all from before… Or at least most of them: Sirius - should I call him Lancelet, Sulla, Hector or Acha? -, Remus - that is, Kai, Nestor, Gaius, Cato or Ameni -, and, of course, that backstabbing bastard… I don't even think I can remember all of their names."
"I should have noticed Peter was in fact Mordred, Chenar, Ay and Brutus… But it wasn't the will of the Goddess. There's no use in regretting that now."
"It was meant to be. It wasn't your task to get rid of Voldemort… All you had to do was make the path for your son to walk upon."
James - 'Micon' was probably more appropriate now, since that had been his name during their last life in Atlantis - grinned. "I see you've already gotten the hang of it."
She laughed.
"Look, Isarma - we're almost there."
The bright sunshine was no longer the only thing reflected in the clear water The simple yet majestic stone buildings of Avalon were now very close, and they were approaching the shore with surprising speed, considering no one was rowing.
Micon encircled her waist, and together they contemplated the isle with reverence. They had just realised how homesick they were…
"We're home."
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May it be the shadow's call will fly away
May it be you journey on to light the day
When the night is overcome, you may rise to find the sun
Darkness has come, believe and you will find your way
Darkness has gone, a promise lives within you now
A promise lives within you now…
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October 30th, 1976
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Lily jolted awake, with the vivid sensation she had just had a very important dream. Unfortunately, she had already forgotten it. Well, it probably wasn't meant for her to know anyway, so it was no use worrying.
The clock beside her bed showed it was already six o'clock, and she got ready in a hurry. She was supposed to organise the Great Hall with Remus tonight. For Hallowe'en, the most idiotic feast of the year.
Well, at least she hadn't been paired with James Potter. He had become a prefect this year, somehow… Lily still hadn't quite gotten used to the idea. That selfish, arrogant bastard was an insult to all the others who'd worked hard to become prefects. He'd probably only gotten the title because the teachers loved him…
But how could anyone love that dolt?
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A/N This is not supposed to be an AU fic. It's just a silly, pretentious Mists of Avalon/Harry Potter crossover.
I've never written a disclaimer before, but I believe this fic needs it. So here it goes:
Disclaimer:
J. K. Rowling owns Sirius, Remus, Peter, James, Harry, Lily, Dumbledore and Voldemort.
I own Nalune.
Colleen McCullough owns Cato, Caesar, Sulla and Brutus (their personalities, at least).
Marion Zimmer Bradley owns Atlantis, the Temple of Light, Rajasta, Domaris (or Isarma) and Micon; Avalon (aka the Isle of Apples, Ynis Witrim), Caillean, Gawen, Gaius, Morgaine, Arthur, Lancelet, Kai and Mordred; Troy, Cassandra, Aeneas, Hector and Nestor.
Christian Jacq owns Egypt ( :o) ), Ramses, Nefertari, Acha, Ameni, Chenar; Horemheb, Ay, Akhesanaton (or Akhesanamon) and her husband Tutankhaton (or Tutankhamon).
I hope I didn't forget anyone.
Oh, of course, Enya owns "May It Be". My apologies to whoever did the research to include the two Sindarin (or Quenya, I can never tell) verses in the song - but this isn't a LOTR fic, so I had to translate them.
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