Author's note: Thanks for the reviews everyone. I know I said there would only be two parts but Hermione wanted to be heard so I squeezed her narrative in the story. Never fear though, the 'confrontation'(and some smutiness) will be next and it will end my first foray into the world of H/Hr. You might notice some similarities with the first part (like the use of the words: sigh, cocoon, imagination….). It's done on purpose and wasn't due to laziness on my part. Oh and I forgot to give the translation of the title: "A heart in winter."
Part 2
The words she had just written down started to blur in front of her eyes and Hermione knew that it was time to turn in for the night. Those reports could wait until tomorrow. Draco had left their office a good while ago and she allowed herself an ungracious yawn. She had learned to know the Slytherin boy better in the four months they had been working together and he wasn't that bad. He wasn't exactly an angel, far from it, but at least she hadn't heard him say the word 'mudblood' in a good three months. Of course it could be that he wanted to avoid being on the wrong end on her wand, again. Hermione recalled a useful spell of hers with particular fondness. No doubt that Draco remembered it too, minus the fondness of course. He was as good as a lamb with her now, and, truth to be told, she rather enjoyed his acid remarks when they were both working on tedious paperwork.
Still, she never really let her guard down around him. She would never yawn her head off, stretch or crack her bones in his presence. These were signs of weakness in her opinion. Better be safe than sorry with Draco Malfoy.
Better be safe than sorry…
Well, this also applied to what she called the 'Harry Case'. Oh, she was safe, no doubt about that. She was fairly certain he knew nothing of her little secret. Trouble was, she was sorry as well. Three years of bottling up your feelings wasn't good for your mental health or general happiness.
But under her bossy attitude Hermione was really an insecure at heart. It was obvious that he didn't think of her in that way. And God knows she had looked for the smallest titbit of interest on his part. With a slight twist of imagination a concerned look or a light brushing of the hand could take an entire new meaning. You could change a lot of things with your imagination…
Apart from his lack of interest there was also the problem of her general appearance. Hermione didn't think she was belittling herself in stating that she was plain. Not ugly, just average. She had made her peace with her hair. She told herself that had she had to choose between nice teeth and straight hair she would have chosen the teeth as the hair could always be charmed on occasion. She had a pretty smile (thanks to Malfoy) and bushy hair and she would have to be happy with that. Still, she was no Cho Chang.
Hermione had completed her examination of the Harry Case at the end of her fifth year and resolved to keep silent. Besides, she was convinced that infatuation wouldn't last.
Hermione Granger was rarely proved wrong. Everyone knew that. But of course there are exceptions. In that case it was a rather big one. It hadn't passed, far from it.
Her sixth year hadn't exactly been hell but something definitely close to it. She was surprised Harry and Ron hadn't noticed anything and she didn't know if she should feel grateful or hurt that her two close friends obviously didn't know her that well.
The Hogwarts letter containing the offer for the Headgirl position had been all the more welcome in the summer. Other than the fact she had wanted the position ever since she'd set foot at Hogwarts, she knew that her new duties would keep her occupied. Less time with Harry was what she needed.
She had allowed herself to hope though. Once. When Harry had come to ask if she wanted to go to the Three Broomsticks one eveining. Of course she should have known he didn't even consider going without Ron.
It had been a month ago.
Hermione sighed and extricated herself from her comfortable chair. The walk to her rooms wasn't long and she soon found herself alone in her cold bed.
***
The next morning Hermione decided to skip breakfast and opted for a walk instead. It had snowed during the night and the December wind was blowing none too gently across the wide expanse of flat ground separating the castle from the lake. The grey sky promised more snow later in the day.
Safely wrapped in her warm cloak and sporting the woollen bonnet and scarf set Harry had given her last Christmas Hermione felt like she was in a cocoon. She had hated her solitude the previous night but relished it on this cold morning. A little smile was playing on her face as she walked toward the lake, her boots crushing the fresh snow. She liked going to near the lake, it reminded her of the time she used to spend here with Harry in their fourth year.
Cherished memories flew through her mind as she sat on a fallen trunk, her feet inches from the water. It was in this very spot that she had realised she wanted Harry to be more than a friend to her for the first time. She took off her gloves and let her hands rest on the cold and decaying wood. It was comforting. She had always felt serene around wood. This particular tree was dead but she could still imagine the sap pulsing, coursing inside…
Her hands were nearly frozen when Harry came to sit beside her.