Harry needed time to think, and he knew that being around Hermione for the time being was not conducive to actual thinking. And she was getting increasingly insistent that he talk to her.
So the next day, he asked Ron to run interference and keep Hermione occupied. He, of course, did not tell him that the reason for this request was to come to grips with his new feelings.
He did have to tell him about the Translucent Dust though since Ron wanted reassurance that Harry really wasn't going crazy. In retrospect, telling Ron the truth might have been a bad idea.
At first, Ron thought what had happened to him was hilarious and he wanted to immediately owl his brothers for a product sample. The two were discussing the matter in a corner of the Gryffindor Common Room and Harry had already had to plead twice for Ron to lower his voice.
"Only you could get in a mess like this," Ron said, chuckling.
"It's not as much fun as it seems," Harry grumbled.
It was at that moment that Ginny passed by and smiled at them in acknowledgment.
Harry quickly averted his eyes, but it was too late. He had already gotten a glimpse of her pink and frilly underwear.
There was a chilling silence.
Ron turned bright red and then he lunged for Harry. "Die, Potter!"
Harry had gotten his wish. He didn't have to worry about being around Hermione since he was being chased by Ron around the castle. He really had to stop challenging Fate like this.
"Hey, let's talk about this!" Harry yelled, dodging hexes and jinxes with his Quidditch-honed reflexes as he ran through the dungeons with an enraged Weasley at his heels. He cursed himself for leaving his wand on his bed.
And it was just his luck that it was lunchtime and everyone was either outside, in their rooms, or eating, so there was no one around to witness this potential homicide.
Wait, lunch! Harry made a dash for the Great Hall. Surely Ron wouldn't attack him with so many witnesses!
A few minutes later, Harry found himself dodging bowls of coleslaw, turkey legs, and other assorted food items.
Okay, he could admit when he was wrong. Where the hell were the teachers anyway? They were never around when he needed to get a detention!
The other students simply watched in fascination and none of them seemed inclined to lend a hand on behalf of their savior and hero.
"Bunch of ungrateful jerks," Harry muttered, scrambling to keep a table between him and the avenging nutball that was supposedly one of his best friends. At least Hermione wasn't around to see this.
He bumped into a girl and mumbled a quickly apology.
Then he recognized who it was. "Hi, Luna."
"How are you and Ronald doing today, Harry?" Luna asked curiously, not batting an eye at the chase scene / food fight occurring before her.
"Now's not a good time," Harry said nervously.
"Luna too?" Ron screamed, his face the color of a tomato. "You bastard!"
Harry tried to protest, but his vision was obstructed by a slice of pumpkin pie.
He wiped the mess off his face and decided that a tactical retreat was in order.
And because these types of situations follow a pattern, they eventually ended back up in the common room.
"Damn it, Ron, I didn't mean to look at her!"
"So you admit you've been looking at her?" Ron cried triumphantly.
"Not like that, you git!" Harry shouted back in frustration. "Besides, I thought you wanted me to get together with Ginny."
"Doesn't mean I want you looking at her unmentionables!"
"Shut up, you idiot!" Harry hissed.
"Did someone mention unmentionables?" Dean asked, coming over from his seat by the fireplace.
"No, we were talking about Unspeakables," Harry said quickly and congratulated himself for his clever lie.
"You mean the unspeakable things you've been doing to my sister?" Ron accused, pointing a finger at him like he was a suspect in a murder mystery.
Harry groaned.
Dean's eyes narrowed. "What's Ron talking about, Harry?"
"Oh, crap," Harry said as he backed away from the two approaching figures.
The tension was broken when Lavender and Parvati walked up to them and asked what was going on.
"Nothing," Harry replied quickly. Then he gave Dean a meaningful look. "And I really mean that."
Dean looked disgruntled but didn't press the issue. Ron merely grunted.
Lavender looked back and forth between the three guys then she shrugged. She said, "Whatever. Come on, guys! It's time for Divination."
Harry paled.
Divination. Trelawny. Oh no.
He wondered if he had time to gouge out his eyes.
~*~
Somehow he made it through the third most horrifying, traumatizing sight of his life. Then he was confronted by his second when McGonagall came by to give them detention for the next three days.
Harry cursed the School Board for making Divination a required subject. A year ago, word had somehow leaked that the prophecy that screwed up his life had came from Trelawny and now every parent and their dog hoped their child would turn out to be a Seer.
The sight of those butter-filled thighs covered not nearly enough by her silk thong...
He shuddered and tried not to retch. Mentally, he moved the horror up above McGonagall on his list. Trelawny was currently fighting Voldemort's snaky butt for dominance as the memory that would drive him insane.
"My life is hell," Harry moaned, trudging up the stairs to the rooms.
"The beating I was going to give you suddenly doesn't look so bad, does it?" Ron asked with a wicked smile.
Harry snorted. "Please. I was just holding back for the sake of our friendship."
"You just keep telling yourself that..."
Harry opened the door and saw Hermione stretched out on top of his bed, looking like she just came from shooting a commercial for an underwear ad.
He gasped, whirled around, and slammed into Ron.
"Oof! What's the big idea?" Ron complained. He stuck his head into the room and a look of comprehension appeared on his face. Then he started snickering.
"It's not funny!" Harry insisted.
"She's just sleeping. I don't see the big deal."
Harry gritted his teeth. "Did your short-term memory just wipe itself?"
Ron shrugged. "She's cute, sure. And I'm sure she looks better to you without the stuffy robes, but it's still just Hermione."
"She's more than cute," Harry replied without thinking.
Ron stared at him, astonishment written all over his face. "Is that why you wanted me to keep her away from you? I thought it was just because of your condition. Are you saying that you-"
Hermione chose that moment to wake up and like most sleepers she started working out the kinks in her limbs.
Oh, God, not the stretching. Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts, Harry chanted silently.
She looked at them sleepily, her hair sticking up all over the place.
She really is cute, Harry thought. He had an almost overwhelming urge to hug her, which he firmly squashed.
"Sorry about that," Hermione said. "Professor Vector canceled Arithmancy today and I thought I'd wait for you where you least expected it. I guess I nodded off. Anyway, Harry-"
Harry interrupted, "Hermione, I need you to leave."
Hermione looked affronted. "What?"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm trying to figure something out right now and I can't do it with you here. I promise you, I swear to you, Hermione, I will answer any question you ask tomorrow, but I can't do that now."
Hermione still looked prepared to argue.
"Please?" Harry pleaded.
There was a long pause then Hermione nodded. She said, "Tomorrow then. But I won't be put off any longer."
Harry collapsed on his bed as soon she left. He was immediately overwhelmed by the scent of vanilla and ink. Harry groaned. So much for having a clear head.
Ron remained at the door, staring at him with wide eyes. Finally, he asked, "So you fancy Hermione?"
"I don't know. That's the problem," Harry said.
"You looked like you were going to have a heart attack. Seems like you fancy her to me," Ron replied, taking a seat on the edge of his bed.
"Maybe it's just hormones," Harry said looking up at the ceiling. "Don't you think that if I liked her I would have realized it before? I never even thought of her that way until I saw her without her clothes. How freaking shallow is that?"
"You could look at it that way or maybe, you just realized that you've been taking Hermione for granted," Ron said.
Harry sat up. "Who are you, and what have you done with Ron Weasley?"
"Just listen to me. Dad always said a healthy relationship needed trust, respect, and attraction. You've had the first two for years. Now, you're just adding the physical part."
Harry lied down again as he worked the idea over in his mind. He certainly trusted Hermione with his life and his respect for her skills, loyalty, and just her in general knew no bounds. But did he really think they would be a good match?
She liked to study, he preferred being outdoors. She wanted to bring people together while he would have been happy if the people just left him alone. She had an obsessive need to plan out almost every aspect of her life, and he had no problem with winging whatever came at him. She said po-ta-to, he said po-tae-toe. Okay, they both actually pronounced it the same way, but that wasn't the point!
And what was the point? The point was none of that mattered. Hermione was actually ideal for a girlfriend. She wasn't a clone of him (which was good since someone had to do the thinking around here!) and she wasn't a complete alien (though she was a member of the confusing species known as girls, but he didn't hold that against her). She balanced him out rather well.
Wait, girlfriend? Was he actually considering it? They told each other practically everything, they had fun together, and they didn't fight like cats and dogs. It didn't hurt that she was intelligent, beautiful, and had saved his life at least half a dozen times at the last count.
So why the hell not?
"I think that I'd like to try," Harry said at last. "But I don't know how. I guess I'll just take it slow. You know, drop a few hints, see how she responds, then move on from there."
"Or you could just flat-out tell her when Hermione asks you what's going on and you have to tell her the absolute truth," Ron suggested.
The room was silent except for the sound of Harry smacking himself with his pillow.
"Oh, damn it. I forgot about that," Harry muttered. He pressed his pillow over his face in the hopes that he could knock himself out.
So much for dilly-dallying about this for the next ten years.
A thought occurred to him. Harry raised his head and glanced at Ron. "So you're not bothered by this? I know you used to be interested in her and you-"
Ron waved a hand. "That ship sailed a long time ago. We just weren't right for each other."
"And you think Hermione and I are? Oh, it doesn't matter, anyway," Harry sighed. "Hermione couldn't possibly be interested in a lunatic like me."
Ron seemed to be fighting back a smile. "You can be such an idiot sometimes, Harry."
Then he left, leaving Harry to wonder what that was supposed to mean.
-->