AN: I know I know….finally, another chapter…it's just been what?....a couple of months! I know and I apologize. Senior year turned out to be very busy. I figured that it's time to finish what I started a year ago. Now I'm not promising a chapter every week, but I will try my hardest. Have fun, thanks for your patience, and as always, tell me what you think!
Ch. 5 A Trip to the Hollow
Harry's heart beat faster every second as he quickly changed clothes. He was finally going back to Godric's Hollow. Once clothed, he quietly left his room. In seconds, he arrived to the Disapparating Room.
"Curious," Aberforth began. "I don't seem to remember telling you where we would be Disapparating from." Harry's heart rose to his throat. A small crooked smile appeared on Aberforth's face, showing his yellow teeth. "Ready Potter?"
"I've been ready for the last six years," Harry responded.
"Well, then take my arm and we'll be off our way." Harry walked forward and grabbed a hold of Aberforth's arm. In seconds, he felt the rush of Disapparating.
Finally, he felt the hard ground under his feet. He opened his eyes to see the remains but was shocked to find that they were standing at a bottom of a hill surrounded by a forest. A single dusty road led up the hill.
"Up this hill you will find what you're looking for," Aberforth said. "If you want to go ahead and lead, I will follow right behind you."
Harry quickly started the following the road. With each step, his heart quickened pace until finally, he was staring at his old house.
It was a two-story house. All the windows were broken, but the door was closed shut. The house radiated the feeling of seclusion and mystery. Most of the shutters (the ones visible) were hanging loosely on the hinges. The house had a layer of dirt covering it, and the roof had missing shingles. Harry lit his wand and took a deep breath. He walked through the door and pushed it open. With the light of his wand leading the way, he entered.
Everything was covered with dust. Harry had the impression that the house had remained untouched ever since the night of his parent's murders. He walked from room to room, moving the light so he could see every inch of the house. In the living room, stood a great fire place surrounded by bookshelves. Each shelf was filled with books on every subject imaginable. Not even Hermione could ever get through all the books. The kitchen was towards the back of the house. A kettle remained on top of the stove. Harry next headed upstairs. The first door led to his parents' room.
He walked towards the dresser and picked up what must have been his mother's brush. Next to the brush was a rusty wallet which must have been his fathers. Pinned on the mirror, a moth-eaten picture laid. As Harry examined the picture, he could tell that under the layer of dust, his mom and dad were celebrating what seemed to be some type of birthday party. After putting the picture in his pocket, he walked away finally feeling his eyes watering. He continued walking around the room. There were plaques and frames hanging crookedly from the walls. Following the wall, he led himself out of the room. Then his eyes fell upon a half-opened door.
He opened the door and found his old room staring back at him. This is where his mother had died; this is where Voldemort had fallen. He walked over to a rocker and sat down as he stared at his room. Hours passed by as feelings of hatred and sadness crept over him while his scar began to tingle. Finally, rays of light began showing through the window.
"Perhaps we should go Harry," Aberforth said quietly by the door. Harry nodded and followed Aberforth to the front door. Before descending the hill, Harry paused and looked back at the house. Then he continued down the hill, quickly running to catch up with Aberforth.
*******
Lunch came too early for Harry. All he had managed to do was lay in bed for the past five hours. His body ached from head to foot, and his head seemed to weigh ten times its normal weight. That did not matter. He couldn't fall asleep. His thoughts were interrupted by a large rumbling in his stomach. Slowly he got up and took a long hot shower until his skin started to turn red. After getting dressed, he went downstairs to a full table of chattering people.
"Good afternoon dear," Mrs. Weasley said getting up from the table. "Someone looks sleepy today. Come and have a seat darling." She piled his plate full of sandwiches and chips as he sat down. He quickly started to eat as he tried avoiding everyone's conversations.
"Harry, you alright mate?" Ron asked. "You look miserable."
"Ron!" Hermione scold at him.
"Well it's true," Ron answered back. "I was mentioning to Hermione that we should take a break today. You know, go play some Wizard Chess to relax a bit." Harry nodded in agreement. "After all, you need to relax for your Occulemency lesson with Hermione tonight." Harry nearly choked on his sandwich. He had forgotten his lessons with Hermione.
They finished eating and went outside to play chess. The day was beautiful. Sun was shining, and the breeze was soothing. Harry spent the afternoon with Ron talking about all sorts of things that ranged from Quidditch to why the sky is blue and not green.
"Harry," Ron began, "there's something I want to talk to you about." His voice sounded a bit nervous. Ron was never good at serious conversations. "Now I'm going to tell you this because I'm your best mate, and I don't like to see you miserable."
"Ok," was all Harry could utter.
"I see you moping around here Harry," Ron started. "I know that with the current circumstances it's hard to be joyous constantly, but you at least need to try and have some happiness. So…I think that you need to be with Ginny again." Harry was startled at what Ron was saying. Out of all the possible things Ron could have said, this was definitely out of nowhere. "I see the way you look at her. I know you still like her. All she wants to do is help Harry. You don't have to shut her out completely. Now I understand that you are a bit worried--"
"You have no idea what you are talking about Ron, "Harry interrupted. "I left Ginny for a reason. She is in enough danger as it is."
"I know Harry, but she-" Ron said.
"She can't be with me," Harry finished the sentence. "You don't know how much I have to worry about without her with me. Plus, I don't like her like that," he finished saying, not feeling like it was completely true. He did miss the feeling of being wanted.
"Where's Hermione at?" Ron asked hastily changing the subject. Harry looked around. He had thought Hermione was reading a book.
"I don't know," he said. "Maybe she went in for something to drink."
"Yeah," Ron said unconvinced. "Or maybe she's writing a letter to "our friend" Victor," he added scornfully.
"Still on that are you?" Harry asked. "They are just friends Ron. Why do you hate him so much?"
"I don't hate him," Ron said, his anger rising. "I think he's just, um, he's just…"
"I'm sure she's just getting something to drink," Harry said. They continued playing and talking until it was too dark to see. They headed inside and they sat down for dinner. Harry was ready for a good meal and then some sleep. Just then, Fred and George came in and sat down next to Harry. The twins greeted them and they started talking about the joke shop while the food finished cooking.
"So are you ready for Hermione to get inside your mind Harry?" Fred asked. "Dad told us she will be teaching Occulemency to you. I don't think I could have someone snoop around my head."
"It's just Hermione," Ron said.
"Still," George interjected. "Aren't you scared that she is going to know "all your secrets?"" he added trying to hold back laughter. "Let's all just hope that you aren't keeping anything big away from her." The twins and Ron all laughed. Harry pretended that it was funny. Eventually everyone came in and joined them. Hermione came in and sat next to Ron. Fred and George caught Harry's eye and winked at him.
After painfully swallowing some food, Harry got up and went to his room. He went and lied down on his bed. His eyes instantly closed as he felt the soft covers. Someone in the distant was calling his name. "Harry wake up," Hermione's voice rang in his head. He opened his eyes to find Hermione sitting next to him. He fumbled out of bed. "Are you ready?" she asked calmly.
"Yes," Harry quickly answered. Deep down he felt his insides churn. He was not ready.
*******
She led the way towards the room that had been having their lessons with Aberforth. The room was dimly lit with a sense of warmth and serenity to it.
"I tried making the room as comfortable and serene as possible," Hermione said seeing Harry's reaction. "It should help calm you down and clear your thoughts. Just don't get too comfortable and fall asleep on me," she added with a chuckle.
"I don't think you need to worry about that," Harry said back. It seemed impossible to calm his nerves at this point- even with the soothing aroma.
"Occulemency is just another subject Harry," Hermione began. "At the beginning, it's hard. As you continue through it, the easier it is to block," she added sounding in a matter-of-fact way. It seemed that every word she said made his heart beat faster.
"It's not that easy Hermione," he said looking at her deeply. "How can I clear my head? It was hard enough a couple of months ago. This seems like a lost cause."
"Remember your first year at Hogwarts?" Hermione asked him as she moved closer to him. "Remember how impossible it seemed to perform magic? It was hard to levitate a feather!" She said as she smiled at him. "And look at you now. If someone asks you to levitate a feather you don't answer with `I can't'. You answer with `stop wasting my time." He cracked a smile and his heartbeat became regular. "So shall we begin?" With a smiling nod they stood opposite each other.
"Clear your mind Harry," she said calmly. He inhaled deeply and took one last look at Hermione. "When I begin," she said to him, "you block with all your might. If you have to, use your wand. Just don't hex me to harshly," she said.
He closed his mind and tried to clear his thoughts. Everything seemed to be fading in and out-the noises, the temperature. Then a sudden thought popped in his mind. A hill crept in his mind as the noises in the room came back.
"Legilimens!" he heard Hermione say. Suddenly a hill and a house became vivid. A brush flashed quickly following a wallet and a picture. "I cannot let her see," he thought to himself. His mind was spinning like a movie on fast forward. Next thing he knew, his eyes were opened. Hermione was on the floor rubbing her backside.
"I'm so sorry Hermione," Harry said as he ran towards her. "I told you this is useless. We should just go." She held onto his arms as he hoisted her up.
"We are not going anywhere until you get this right," she said to him sternly. "This isn't a lost cause. I actually think that it was a good first try," she added reassuringly. "We each just need to learn from our mistakes. For example, I just learned that I need a softer landing," she said. With a flick of her wand pillows flew from across the room and landed behind her making a large blanket of pillows. "Now what did you learn from your mistake?"
"I need to clear my mind," he said feeling shameful and embarrassed.
They lined up again. Harry closed his eyes and again tried clearing his mind. This time, all he could think of is how Hermione is about to see everything because he can't get it out of his head. After another distant Legilimens, he found himself running across the room towards a fallen Hermione. When he went to help her, she grabbed his hand and pulled him down next to her.
"I can't do this Hermione," he said to her. "My mind keeps racing with images. How can I clear my mind when I know someone is about to get into it?" he added with frustration. "I don't think anyone expects me to be able to do it. Snape and Voldemort probably had a good laugh about it." He paused as he thought of Snape and Voldemort having a cup of tea as they laugh at him.
"There's your problem Harry," Hermione said quietly. "You need to stop thinking of all these things. You need to push all those things deep inside you. That is the only way you will be able to clear your mind," she added looking deep into his eyes. "You're not alone Harry," she finally said to him. "I had the same problem when Aberforth was teaching me."
"What did you do about it?" he asked her.
"He told me that the only way to protect those that I love is to not think about them," she said as her eyes began to water. "Every feeling and thought had to vanish-no matter how much it hurt. We ended up talking for awhile about what I was thinking about," she said to him. "Once my feelings were out, the less I worried about them and the easier it became to clear my head."
"I bet that was hard to do," Harry said to her. It occurred to him that Hermione never really talked to him about how she was feeling, except on his birthday. "I'm assuming you trust Aberforth deeply now," he said to her. She nodded and gave a weak smile.
"Let's just say he's very understanding," she said. "Just like his brother." There was a quick paused before she continued, "Is there anything you want to talk about?" He took a second to think. He didn't need to talk because everything that Hermione said made sense. The only way to protect the ones he loves is be getting them out of his head
"No," he answered back. He noticed that she looked a bit shocked at his answer, and with a sad expression on her face, she made an effort to get up. He grabbed her hand and sat her back down. "I trust you more than anyone I know," he said to her. The candles reflected off of her eyes as he stared deep into them. "You don't need to be in my head to notice when something is going on," he said with a smile. "You are right Hermione. The only way to protect you, is to get you out of my head," he said as he got up. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed her smile.
They lined up once again. He thought of an open space-a field. He was by himself as the breeze swept through his hair. No sign of his friends. No nightmares and no houses were in sight. He opened his eyes and stared directly at Hermione. Their eyes met. Quickly Hermione's body was replaced by a tall, black haired and greasy man. Harry was back in the open room, with Snape staring at him. All he could think of was his satisfaction of being able to block Snape.
"Legilimens!" Snape said loudly in Hermione's voice. Harry felt like he had been hit with a bat, but he stayed staring at Snape. Nothing crossed his mind. Nothing was in his mind now except for defeating Snape. He could feel the distant force trying to get into his mind, but he didn't let it. He finally cleared his mind.
Then suddenly he found himself in a different room. Hermione was sitting on the couch in her room. She was crying. Ron came storming into the room and threw a stack of letters on her lap. He was yelling, yet everything was mute. Everything was happening in fast motion and in broken clips. Harry started to walk towards them when suddenly he was thrown backwards. He opened his eyes to find Hermione running towards him with a huge smile on her face.
"You did it Harry!" she said as she tackled him with a hug.
"Why am I on the floor?" he asked foolishly not realizing what had just happened.
"Oh," Hermione said sounding a bit embarrassed. "You blocked me extremely well, but then you started coming into my thoughts. I wasn't expecting that so I reacted instinctively. I'm sorry," she added as her cheeks flushed. He couldn't help but give a huge smile. He started laughing uncontrollably.
"I did it Hermione!" he said as he grabbed her and hugged her. "That was unbelievable! I felt absolutely nothing and it was great!" She smiled back and together the laughed until their cheeks hurt.
"I guess the lesson's over for today," Hermione finally said ending the laughter. "We'll try again in two days," and with one hand on her shoulders, Harry led the way back to their rooms. He couldn't help think about one thing. He was in Hermione's memory which meant that the fight with Ron had occurred or at least, she was thinking of it in some way. They arrived at their bedrooms quietly smirking at each other.
"Hermione," Harry said whispering to her.
"Yes Harry," she responded.
"You tell me things right?" he asked her. He noticed that it sounded better in his head. Her face changed and she nodded.
"There are certain things that I choose not to tell you in order to make things better for you, not because I don't trust you," she said to him. "There are enough worries in your head already. You need to trust me and my decisions on what and when I tell you things."
"Well," Harry began. "I just…I just," he stumbled on his thoughts; "I just want you to know that I'm here for you. I don't ever want you to feel alone just because you don't want to "make more worries" for me."
"I know," was how she responded. "And you Harry. Do you not tell me things so I won't worry?" she asked. He smiled at her. "I thought so," she said with a smirk. He saw her give a quick glance at Ron's door. She then came to him and gave him a tight hug. As she opened her door, Harry couldn't resist the temptation any longer.
"So Ron huh?" was all he could say. She stopped and turned to look at him.
"So Godric's Hollow huh?" she answered back. With a final tired look, she stepped into her room and closed the door.
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