Disclaimer: All characters, events and references drawn from HP belong to J.K. Rowling, etc., respectively, everything else is my own invention.
FULFILLMENT
PART TWO
Hermione leapt into the air, throwing both arms around Harry's neck and wrapping her legs around his waist, almost causing him to topple over backwards. He stepped back to keep from falling and then quickly wrapped his own arms around her tightly.
They held each other silently for a few moments. Hermione sighed and Harry closed his eyes, feeling her warm embrace that always soothed him no matter what he might be going through.
"I missed you," she uttered through a muffled voice, her face buried in his neck.
"Hermione…you saw me yesterday," he replied slowly.
"I know…too long," she spoke, almost dreamily.
He laughed a little and she then pulled back and smiled at him. The deep brown in her eyes coupled with the softness of her expression pierced his heart and he again felt the intense desire to do the one thing that he simply could not do at this time. This fearsome want in him was exactly what he didn't need right now. He needed to focus on what he was supposed to do or else he thought he might go mad. He definitely could not move forward with her yet.
He looked down briefly and exhaled and then looking back at her face again, he saw that beautiful, cheery expression change into one of sadness as she gazed into his own eyes, as though she could see into his very soul. He knew that his struggling and the distance he was placing between them was hurting her and he longed for her to know that he had not let go of her, but the words simply would not come out.
Hermione's expression now became one of compassion and she smiled slightly again, letting her feet down on the floor once more and then drawing him closer with her tightened embrace.
"Happy birthday, Harry," she said, leaning in and kissing him softly on the lips. She did not linger long, however. She understood his mind on the matter even though it pained her. Harry wanted so badly to just lean in and kiss her strongly, but the conflict inside seemed to intensify even more. This torture was almost too much for him. He let go of her and backed away slightly, her arms lingering on his shoulders and then finally returning to her side. She was clearly struggling as much as he was now. Oh, how he hated to see her like this!
He looked up again and smiled halfway, trying to keep his own pain from showing through but he knew that it was futile.
Suddenly, Hermione once more smiled at him and as though she were deliberately trying to lighten the mood, her demeanor became one of cheerfulness. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small box, wrapped in green paper. She then handed it to Harry, who was sufficiently distracted with her look to feel a bit more at ease.
"I got this for you," she spoke, as though there was nothing wrong at all between them.
Harry had a look of curiousness and reached out to take the box. He then pulled off the paper and opened the lid. Inside was a silver ball about the size of a large marble. He pulled it out of the box, gazing at his distorted reflection in its shiny surface. It felt heavy, despite its size. Looking back at her, his face was contorted in puzzlement at the strange birthday present she had given him.
"What is it?" he queried.
"It's called a Pop-Off," Hermione returned, seeming almost embarrassed at the name. "It's charmed to eliminate that horrible noise when you apparate or disapparate. Now you can go anywhere without people being alerted to your arrival."
"Is that the reason I didn't hear you disapparate in the living room?" he asked.
She reached into her pocket again and pulled out another silver ball. His face now brightened up.
"Wow. That's great, Hermione. Thanks," he told her with another smile. "Where did you get them?"
"Courtesy of the specialty section at Weasley's Wizards Wheezes. I know…the name is sort of a dead giveaway, really. Leave it to the twins to come up with yet another trick to help pranksters the world over be able to get away with their schemes."
Hermione laughed a little at these words, cheering Harry up further and they both felt the earlier tension now break a little.
"I must say, though," she continued, looking at the silvery object in her hand, "these may actually come in handy."
She placed hers back in her pocket and watched Harry do the same. She then took on the air of a comforting nurse.
"Well now, you probably haven't had any breakfast, so go and sit down in the living room and I'll make us some tea." She spoke, reaching out to take his arms briefly, motioning him toward the doorway.
"That sounds good," Harry responded, nodding his head.
As he began walking toward the doorway, he turned and briefly watched as she foraged through the old worn out cabinets. That desire again reared up inside and Harry thought he might burst. She was so amazing to him. How could there be so much love and strength inside something so beautiful? Something so delicate and… Harry shook his head and turned back towards the living room quickly. This was becoming even more difficult, seeing her and wanting…
He crashed down on the sofa, burying his face in his hands. With everything in his power he would find out TODAY what he must do. He would make the decision NOW. He simply couldn't continue to stay distant from her. He wanted more than anything to see her happy and to feel once again that freedom and love they had shared for many months now without all the doubt and uncertainty hanging over everything. Harry continued in his thoughts, trying to determine who he knew that might be able to help him in this hour of dire need.
Hermione suddenly appeared out of nowhere, two tea cups on saucers balanced in her hands, followed by a small plate full of biscuits and jam floating behind her. She reached out and handed one of the saucers to Harry and then turned, grabbed the floating plate and gently placed it on the small table in front of the sofa. She then turned once more and sat down next to Harry, so close that their legs brushed up against one another. Harry felt a chill down his spine. 'Was she doing things like this deliberately?' he wondered. Did she know how crazy it drove him? Hermione however, appeared completely oblivious, sipping her hot tea slowly.
The two of them just sat in silence for eternal moments and then she turned to look at him.
"So how did it go at the Burrow last night?" Hermione asked him, sounding terribly similar to an interested wife asking her husband how things had gone at the office.
"Great," Harry started, feeling a bit strange at the tone of her question, "crowded as usual. Every Weasley was there except for Bill. He and Fleur couldn't make it."
"Did Mrs. Weasley make her famous 'burnt' roast for dinner, for your birthday?" Hermione quizzed him with a big smile.
Harry laughed, almost spitting tea all over the floor. Hermione followed suit, seeming pleased to lighten his mood.
"Of course, along with her usual fruit and nut 'cement' cake, complete with exploding candles exchanged for the real ones by Fred and George,"
Hermione now burst out laughing, trying not to drop her saucer and cup.
"Mrs. Weasley realized it the moment I refused to blow them out, and verbally thrashed the two of them. But she didn't stay mad very long on account of the 'guest of honor'."
"Really? I didn't think she minded that sort of thing in front of you," she said with puzzlement.
"Not me. Neville. He's her favorite visitor now," Harry replied.
"Ohhhh. That's right, I forgot. Has he begun to feel more comfortable around the whole clan yet?"
"A little. He still gets flustered when she drills him with questions about his family and his new career. Ginny invariably has to step in to stop her mum from embarrassing both of them in front of everyone, but I think he understands what life at the Weasley's entails now."
"It's still hard to believe that he and Ginny…"
"I know, but they get along really great. Before dinner, they were practicing dueling with each other outside while Ron and the twins practiced some Quidditch maneuvers, with Ron's 'fan club' watching, of course."
"Hmmm. Luna seems to fit in well with everyone there doesn't she?"
"Yes. She's an unofficial part of the 'family' now too. Mr. Weasley really seems to enjoy talking with her about the Ministry and her Father's business and Fred and George had her in stitches almost all night, which of course, made Ron jealous. But I am so amazed at the two of them together, Hermione. Ron's days of acting like a prat and thinking only about himself seem to be gone forever - she's worked a true 'miracle' on our friend."
She laughed a little bit in between sips of the warm liquid, nodding in agreement.
Silence once again took over. Hermione had definitely lit up this dreary place with her presence, but that nagging sense of gloom seemed never far away from his mind. Despite their conversation, he simply could not stave off the inevitable feelings that conflicted within his soul.
"Harry, I thought we might go out for some lunch later, if you would like," Hermione broke in on his pensive thoughts.
He sighed slightly. Not now. He had determined to resolve this dilemma before anything else would happen on his birthday. He just didn't know how. He needed more time alone, at least.
"There's…something I need to do today, Hermione," Harry spoke apologetically, looking into her eyes once more. "I'm sorry. Maybe tomorrow."
The words were like daggers piercing her heart. Her countenance fell and she turned to look at the floor, nodding in agreement. Harry felt the terrible pain inside of him, echoing her own. There it was again. That strange connection that would pop up every so often. It was absolutely wonderful when they shared something good together and simply awful when they would 'communicate' in some negative way. Harry turned to look away, wondering what he should do. He hated being the reason for her sadness at this moment.
"Harry, I know you are still struggling with this," she spoke, turning to her body to face him better, "but you know that I am still with you and will help you in any way that I can. So, please don't shut me out. I love you so much…"
Harry didn't look at her, however. He felt pitiful at the sound of her caring words. He nodded slightly, trying not to let the mixed feelings of pain and deep longing for her drive him to the point of tears.
"You'll figure it out, Harry. I know you will," she then said with such kindness in her voice.
She then leaned in and kissed him gently on the cheek. Harry felt her warm touch and his head drooped a little. She backed away but unexpectedly stopped not far from his face. He could now feel her breath on his skin and he feared what might happen next. Indeed, she leaned in once more, closing her eyes and kissing him even longer on the cheek again. She then slowly and delicately kissed him on the nape between the back of his jaw and neck. Harry's eyes shut involuntarily. His breath intensified at the softness of her lips on his neck as she continued to kiss him, moving even slower down his neck. Hermione…please. This is killing me.
He was almost on the verge of turning and taking her into his arms, career or destiny be damned.
CRASH!
They both jumped as Harry's tea cup slipped off of its saucer and shattered on the floor, spilling the warm liquid all over their jeans and shoes. Hermione was so startled that she immediately dropped her cup too, sending fragments of china and black tea on the wooden floor. They both stood up immediately, breathing heavily, as thought they had been jarred from some wonderful dream.
"Oh, Harry. I'm so sorry," Hermione uttered, starting to reach down and pick up some of the pieces.
"It's okay…Hermione," Harry told her, stooping down to help her. He was still reeling from the intensity of the moment.
She pulled out her wand and with a quick flick the tea had dried completely from their pants, shoes and floor. The two of them grabbed the broken pieces and took them into the kitchen. After cleaning up a bit, they both just stood quietly together, neither of them being able to find the words to speak at the moment. Finally, Hermione, with her arms crossed and appearing almost desperate, looked up at Harry.
"You are still coming tonight, right?" she asked him with such longing in her voice it tugged at his heart. He nodded.
"Yes. I'll be there," he replied.
"Don't forget, five o'clock," she spoke again, "Dad and Mum can't wait for you to come. Mum is preparing something really special for your birthday, Harry."
Hermione moved a little closer to him, now smiling again.
"She talks about you constantly now. You would think that she was in love you, the way she goes on and on."
Harry laughed a little and both of them seemed to maintain a good composure despite what was brewing beneath the surface in both their hearts.
Harry simply couldn't help himself now. He reached out quickly and took her into his embrace, holding her as though he never wanted to part. He felt her grip his waist tightly again, and she groaned a little at the surprise of his sudden affection. He backed off to see that strong desire in her eyes, her face flush with the feelings that he knew were overwhelming her mind at the moment. He smiled at her, wanting her to know that he still loved her more than anything, but needed to get his life straight before they could truly be together.
"I'll see you at five, Hermione," he spoke with such confidence in his expression.
She nodded at him and then leaned in once more to kiss him softly on the lips. She then let go and once more pulled out her wand. Walking away from him, she turned and looked back, still with that deep longing in her eyes. She then spoke and with another flick of her wand, apparated from the kitchen. There was no sound at all, at her disappearance, and Harry shook his head in amazement, reaching into his pocket once more to pull out and look at the silver ball she had given him.
He suddenly felt the weight of all the emotions of the past half hour come crashing down on him, feeling his eyes water slightly.
Who can I go to? Who out there would understand? Professor McGonagall might be able to help, but he wasn't sure how available she might be with the preparation for the upcoming term at Hogwarts. He didn't want to bother her with something like this right now. Maybe one of the teachers…
Suddenly, the thought that now seemed so obvious shot through his mind. Of course! One person he knew who had helped him so much several years back and who had proved to be a very loyal friend and counselor to the three of them over the years.
Harry pulled out his own wand now, not wanting to waste a moment. He returned the Pop-Off to its place in his pocket and spoke out loud.
In an instant he had apparated out of the gloomy confines of his home at 12 Grimmauld Place to a far more beautiful place - one that he had enjoyed visiting so much over the past year…