Harry was still waiting outside the scarlet express for Hermione. They had planned before the start of holiday to meet up here and she had yet to arrive. Daniel, meanwhile, had ditched the station in favor of the comforts to be found onboard the train about fifteen minutes ago.
Harry scanned the incoming groups of people for Hermione. He couldn't see her anywhere and Hedwig, who had shown up on her own last night was sleeping in her cage, completely exhausted from her journey. He had sent her with a quick missive to the tracker to cancel the job before she could really rest. Poor girl didn't even hoot a feeble retort at being jostled around when they had arrived at the platform.
The crowds grew thinner and soon the Hogwarts Express was giving a long, low blow of its horn to indicate it was starting down the tracks. Harry backed up and grabbed a railing, placing Hedwig behind him on the steps. He leaned out of the train watching for Hermione who by now was running desperately late. She had to be fretting about making the train with all her things. He had his wand out ready to summon her things from her so she could run more easily and hurry to catch up with the train.
Incredulous, Harry watched the platform disappear as the express rounded the first turn. Hermione had missed the train. Harry looked back at his exhausted owl and knew he'd have to wait until he reached Hogwarts to tell a professor that Hermione wasn't with them. They would be able to locate her and get her safely back to school.
Hermione was going to be ballistic when she found out she had missed the train. She took school and her head duties very seriously. She'd worry endlessly about missing her patrol duties onboard and the first meeting of the new semester with the other head and prefects. He was sure she would be complaining about that in the days to come until school work took over their lives and the push for N.E.W.T.S grew heavier on the mind.
Harry pulled himself all the way inside and picked Hedwig up off the steps before climbing into the passenger carriage. Strolling down the aisle, Harry looked for an empty compartment; however most of the compartments were full, so Harry continued toward the back of the train. Three quarters of the way back, Harry walked by a full compartment and kept going only to stop and reverse steps.
Inside Daniel and his buddies were laughing and talking. Harry couldn't hear a word of what they were saying but he could see something that filled his gut with a cold sick feeling. Hermione was in there, her head on Daniel's shoulder, and Crookshanks in her lap. The kneazle's orange eyes accused Harry for the current position he was in with Daniel scratching behind his ears and a smart smack on his nose for a warning hiss. Harry had never felt so loved by the cat before.
Harry tore his eyes away from the scene and with a heavy heart walked to the end of the carriage. He paused, his hand on the door handle, and dropped his head. He should have known this was going to happen. Didn't it always happen? But he had thought Hermione was different. Something special--he--he loved her. The cold feeling grew in his stomach, immobilizing him as thoughts whirled in his mind. Memories of them flashed by quickly, easily drawn up thanks to his continued practice of Occlumency.
Their first kiss came to mind, hesitant and tantalizing all at once, the shock of feeling that raced through him when their lips touched. The kiss had melted into several more right there in the midst of the library stacks until they emerged for air, breathing heavily and smiling happily their head clouded with foggy thoughts. He saw Hermione giggling uncontrollably in relief beneath him until he kissed her, effectively diverting her attention. He recalled how her nose twitched as she studied, mentally arguing the whole time with the author as she read for Divination. Her dislike of the subject and continued perseverance to see the class through was a source of great amusement to him.
Harry dropped the handle and turned around. He was going to get to the bottom of this treachery. There had to be something more! Some bewitchment or curse on her performed by Daniel. He'd been sniffing after her from the first time Harry had shown interest. The cold feeling in his gut solidified and burned hotly, focusing on his brother.
He yanked the compartment door open, startling the inhabitants. Harry had eyes only for Hermione and Daniel. His world narrowed down to them and he strode forward, an unconscious shield snapping into place around him as someone behind him tossed a hex at his back. They didn't try again. Harry stopped, towering over the subdued couple.
"What the hell do you think you are doing, Harry?" Daniel yelled, moving to stand up.
Harry took out his wand and leveled it at Hermione's chest. "Finite!" he said before anybody could do something to stop him.
When nothing happened but a growing angry expression on her face, Harry took a step backwards in disbelief. A hurt expression crossed his face before he quickly schooled his features into the cool mask he had perfected all his life. He turned to Daniel, the icy hot feeling in him spreading, constricting his throat for just a moment.
"It seems you've won yet again, brother of mine."
Daniel smirked. "It wasn't even a competition. Hermione and I have been together this whole time. Haven't we, luv?" He turned toward her, smiling slightly.
Hermione nodded, slipping her hand into Daniel's. "I did like you Harry," she offered, "but Daniel is something else, you know?"
"No, I don't know," Harry replied unhelpfully. "Why don't you tell me?"
"Back off Harry," Daniel said, blocking Harry's view of Hermione. "She doesn't have to explain herself to you."
Harry tensed his jaw, saying nothing as he squashed the impulse to blast his brother aside. He fingered his grip on the wand, relishing in the smooth texture before replacing it as calmly as he could in his robes. Daniel's smirk grew at the sign of Harry's capitulation.
"If that's the way you two want to play it," Harry said, his mask slipping, replaced by a cruel sneer. "Then I'll leave you two lovebirds to it."
Harry whirled around with Hedwig and stormed out of the compartment with his head held aloft. Hedwig hooted indignantly at his rough handling or maybe at Hermione's total personality change. Seething rage brewed beneath the surface, lighting an emotion that had been building for years. Daniel the Dipshit was going down, Harry thought, dumping his things and placing Hedwig and her cage into the only empty compartment on the whole train and shutting the door. He threw himself against the cushions after letting Hedwig out so she could rest on the top of the opposite seat.
For the rest of the train ride he pondered the fruitlessness of his life and cursed the both of them until he ran out of clever, witty, and snarky things to call them. He fell asleep in his livid state halfway to Hogwarts and dreamt of Daniel and Hermione together in weird half-formed segments, the sick feeling in his stomach returning and churning his insides.
§ Nagini, my dear,§ he hissed, pulling himself from out of the chair. § We mustn't cool our heals any longer. Harry Potter should have reached a decision by now. We shall send him a missive.§
§ Yes, Master,§ Nagini sighed softly, curling around his shoulders, her tongue tickling his ear. § Daniel is no longer important,§ she stated more than asked.
§ You're right, my dear, he is not. Harry is the true prophecy child; the one I attacked; the little brat that was willing to sacrifice himself for the other sniveling one. How we were too blind to notice before is beyond me, because now it seems downright obvious.§
§ So we write the young Potter boy and when he meets with us we kill and eat him then go to Germany.§
He rapped her lightly on the skull. § No, Nagini, we see what he has to say. We will soon find out just what Harry Potter is made of; whether he be for us or against us. Will he be my pet or Dumbledore's is no matter, but we will have to watch him as he is powerful… oh yes is he powerful…§
§ And Germany, master?§
§ Germany will come, my dear, as it always does for our little check ups,§ he said quietly, thinking. § Perhaps instead of checking on Godric's garter we will check up on our father's father's ring.§
§ Do not forget to question Malfoy on his progress to locate the cup.§
He strolled out of the castle and down the hill away from the wards. § I will not forget,§ he said after a while, § that Malfoy's uses are dwindling rather than flourishing. Like Bella, like Pettigrew. I need the vibrancy of youth to fuel this war and once again we will need fresh recruitments.§
§ Why is it the old get stogy and set in their ways?§ Nagini asked, shifting to settle herself more comfortably before he aparated away.
§ I do not know, but I fear I am becoming complacent once again…§ he said, turning on his heel and disappearing from sight.
Harry woke up sweating with pain in his scar and with a new weight settling in his stomach. It was true then, he thought vaguely trying to grab at the elusive fragments of his dream, that he was indeed the real Boy-Who-Lived. He had always suspected, but here was proof. And what was that about Germany? He tried to recall and found his thoughts too unfocused, the deadweight of this new revelation competing with the coldness of his gut and Hermione's betrayal.
Hedwig flew into his lap and Harry stroked her feathers silently, his mind elsewhere. The rage had receded and he stared out of the window, numb to it all. And the minutes passed like hours and the hours like days until the sun set and the motion of the train slowed down. Harry pulled himself from his thoughts and opened the window, letting a reluctant Hedwig depart and fly the short distance to the school and her home in the owlery.
The remainder of the time left on the train, Harry spent pacing. The longer he thought about it the less he was inclined to think it hadn't been a ruse, a clever trick. To think he fell for her, the bint! He acted like a lovesick fool and how she must have laughed her pretty little head off at that. How could he have been so stupid, so blind as to not see what had been in front of him the entire time?
He should have listened to his gut that first night he saw her looking freshly fucked coming in from patrols. She'd slapped him, she had said, stopping Daniel from taking another liberty with her person, that she didn't want Daniel, only him, Harry. But he'd been right all along to despise Daniel, to be jealous of their patrols, that they were really eating each other's faces the whole time instead of looking for other groping couples and school troublemakers like they were suppose to, like she claimed they were doing.
Idiot, he thought, slamming a fist against the sliding door, feeling the wood vibrate beneath his hand. He had wanted her to be his so badly, he had been willing to look past everything. He laughed mirthlessly. He had had her all right; he had been her first lover. That, Harry knew couldn't be faked, but why sleep with him when she really wanted Daniel? Why lower herself to have a fuck with him?
Harry paused, recalling a previous conversation where he had accused Hermione of being with him because it was like practice to be with Daniel. That was it then, wasn't it? She had slept with him to learn all his quirks so she could show Daniel she was amazing in bed. She wanted to be a seductress for Daniel and had to practice with him--to get over the awkwardness of the first time!
"I should have known better," he growled under his breath as the train stopped at the Hogsmeade station. "I should have known better than to expect something good to happen to me."
Harry patted his pockets, checking that his shrunken trunk was there before picking up Hedwig's cage and leaving the train with the rest of the students. Students gazed at him warily as he went by them, but he didn't notice, his attention focused inwards. He loaded himself into a thestral-drawn carriage and shut the door with a force that shook the whole body. As he left the station behind, Harry spared it one last look before a grim excuse for a grin settled on his features. The Head Boy and Girl had better watch themselves this term.
---
The Great Hall ceiling was gray and bleak. Snow drifted down hazily as the sun fought the clouds for presence in the sky. It was February and Harry was sitting across from a deceptively quiet Luna, not speaking with her or anyone. She didn't seem to mind his presence and was one of the few people at the school that didn't openly despise him because of Daniel's new bout of rumor mongering.
He picked at his food, his appetite gone. The cold dread that filled him a month ago had stayed his constant companion, even more steady then Hedwig who seemed to recognize his need for comfort. She never got haughty or frustrated with him when he misbehaved and on occasion had even been his lookout for his latest in a string of nasty pranks.
Daniel had somehow managed to always come out of them smelling like a rose. Harry didn't know what bothered him more, his brother's ability to gain more popularity outside of Gryffindor with every prank or Hermione's easy dismissal of them. She never stayed pranked for very long as she always countered them quickly and efficiently. Whatever he did to her, she rose above it, quietly helping Daniel out of his own predicament or watching him laugh it off with friends.
He had come across them more than once, snogging and pawing at each other heavily in broom cupboards. It seemed with Daniel, Hermione was also trying to make the BC100 Club, something he was sure Daniel enjoyed every minute of. The thought of them make him so sick that only two weeks ago he had hexed Daniel to break out in boils every time he kissed Hermione. He had done the same for Hermione, but she appeared as unaffected as she usually did. It was like she wasn't even there.
Harry had also hit Daniel down by the Quidditch pitch locker rooms a week ago with a jinx he'd personally designed to put him in scanty female underwear every time he thought of having sex with Hermione. The poncy little git thought about it a lot. He was always losing his clothes at the worst of times.
He overheard in the Ravenclaw common room that they once came off near Snape and the greasy professor merely raised a gleeful eyebrow at Daniel's situation. Flitwick tried to dispel the curse and only managed to change the underwear to bright pink instead of the Slytherin colors Harry had picked out before, which impressed Harry because the spell had been cast in parseltongue.
Surprisingly, Hermione was apparently to distracted by her newly announced boyfriend, to even care about her falling grades. They were slipping so far down the scale, that Harry couldn't even garner a small kernel of satisfaction from it. McGonagall had mentioned it again and again in class, taking more and more points from Ravenclaw for her lack of preparation and shoddy schoolwork. Same held true for the other teachers, though they seemed more worried about finding out what was wrong with her than taking points from her.
Harry noticed Dumbledore watching him at every meal as a predator would its prey. It was like the Headmaster was waiting for one foot to be put out of place. He could see in the wizard's eyes that he blamed everything wrong at the school on his head, from the new house alliances (which only Daniel could break through) and McGonagall's attitude, to Hermione's blatant ignorance of her duties and coursework.
In the end Harry blocked his emotions off, retreating to the unsociable standoffish mask of the forgotten and overlooked twin, using it as a barrier between him and everyone else. With it on, he could pretend he wasn't hurt by Hermione's actions. He could pretend he was fine, unchanged from the start of the year. However, the loss of his appetite for food and life could not be hidden so easily.
He thought constantly about packing up and leaving, taking his money from the deal with Verbena and exploring the world. But it smacked too much like running away, giving in, and letting Daniel win. Sometimes in the deepest dark of night, he dreamt about stealing Hermione back; but he would always wake up and his head would tell him not to be ridiculous.
Gradually Harry dragged himself from his internal thought processes and focused on the zany girl before him chewing on the end of a blueberry sugar quill. Her giant blue eyes were lost in thought. The sight was sexy without meaning to be. Luna was without artifice and that was something Harry greatly appreciated at the moment.
She sensed his gaze and took the quill out of her mouth. Her cherry red lips pouting slightly in thought before she said candidly, "If you keep staring a tifflepod will enter your pupils and eat away at the inside of your eyeballs. I hear it's dreadfully painful. You should be careful."
"Really?" Harry said, bemusement slipping through his stoic mask. "Who told you this?"
She suckled on her sugar quill for a moment. "My grandpappy."
"Was he telling you stories?"
She shrugged, leaning over to gather her things. "Grandpappy very much liked to tell tall tales and small tales. I never bothered a wit to sort them all out. He's dead now." Harry didn't know what to say so he said nothing. Luna continued blithely, "You and Hermione got bitten by the misfortune flea. If you could find it and destroy it you two would be free of your miseries."
"Hermione's perfectly fine," Harry scoffed, the cold anger burning intensely at the thought of her.
"Is she?" Luna asked, frowning slightly. "She acts as an inferi would or a mummy; present but not all there. In the future you should remember that the queen says it's a poor sort of memory that only works backward."
"What does that mean?" Harry asked, puzzled.
"I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, sir, because I'm not myself you see."
"It would be so nice if something made sense for a change," Harry grumbled, sinking his head onto his arms.
"Now you're getting somewhere," Luna said brightly.
Harry watched her leave shaking his head at the blonde Ravenclaw's retreating back. He glanced across the hall and saw Hermione feeding Daniel pieces of fruit between kisses and his mask fell into place once again. Thrusting the bitter emotions away, Harry too gathered his things and left the hall.
---
"Have you found anything?" Harry asked the old house elf bowing before him. "Anything at all about the locket?"
"No, Kreacher has not found anything. Kreacher has looked for snake boy and Mistress, oh he has looked. Kreacher asked other elves what they knew and none were able to dig anything up."
Harry sighed, raking a hand through his hair and looking around the Chamber with bloodshot eyes before turning back. "That's okay. I know you're trying your hardest. Keep looking; follow any lead no matter how brief or cold."
"Of course Kreacher will, snake boy. Kreacher will search high and low again. Perhaps he will find something that was overlooked before."
"Good."
---
Harry read the slip of paper Luna had snuck into his backpack for a third time and shook his head. All her riddles and silly quotes and factual fictions, they never made any sense to him and neither did this:
Kisses may come and kisses may go but a sea otter is forever.
He looked up to see Hermione slipping into the common room and felt his heartbeat speed up in a curious combination of longing and resentment. He watched her, recalling the words Luna had said and for the first time he felt like he saw it. There she was plodding along and the Hermione he knew never plodded. Her hair was a frightful mess, her eyes bloodshot, her face pale and lifeless and the only thing Harry could feel was that burning sense of coldness.
---
Dumbledore beckoned with a wrinkled hand for him to take a seat. Harry groped blindly for a chair and sat down. There was a sweeping tide of power building in the room and Harry could only figure it came from the Headmaster. He waited, wondering what this was all about and why the need for the power show.
"Do you know why I've asked you here today, Mr. Potter?" the Headmaster said in a voice so removed from the genial grandfather usually presented that it shocked Harry speechless.
Harry shook his head mutely, thinking of the newest letter from Voldemort still burning a hole in his pocket before remembering quickly to add a meek, "No, sir."
"I'm sure you've noticed the new string of pranks that have been plaguing a few select students."
"That's terrible," Harry deadpanned. "Who would do such a thing?"
Dumbledore clasped his hands over the desk and said, "I believe you would, Mr. Potter." Harry didn't respond, refusing to incriminate himself. "I believe, you see, that losing Miss Granger to your brother made you feel justified in seeking revenge. Your pranks are not jokes, Mr. Potter, they are cruel and thoughtless acts."
"What my brother and Granger do together is none of my concern," Harry replied tersely. "As for your accusations, you have no proof or you would have charged and sentenced me by now."
"In either case, Mr. Potter, surely you are not so injured by events to not realize that your actions have cause Miss Granger undo mental grief. She's under the strain of Head duties as well as N.E.W.T.S. and doubtless all the nuances of young love. Your added pressure to her is cracking her. She is falling apart."
"I again place to you why this is my concern at all?"
"Because, Mr.--Harry, you once cared for her, did you not? Show her a little kindness."
Harry's mouth thinned at the reminder of his own foolishness. "I don't give a wit about her, Headmaster. She should learn to fix her own problems and you should learn to keep your overly large nose out of others' business."
"The pranks will stop Harry, or you will be expelled."
"You have no grounds, sir," Harry repeated, standing. "Only suspicions and suspicions, Headmaster, give you nothing."
"You should leave now, Mr. Potter."
---
Harry stretched his legs and stood up from the cold, stone floor. His knees creaked and his muscles ached. His skin was scratchy and dry from trying to transform himself into a basilisk, the only plus in his otherwise bleak existence. He could make his skin scaly but he couldn't push his form further than that. It was like he was mentally blocked.
§ You've been a moody snot recently,§ Oorjit hissed from his perch on one of the giant snake statues. § I've been patient, thinking you would speak with me, but apparently you do not consider me a confident. I know Serion held your ear, perhaps you would benefit from a little talk.§
§ Got all night?§ Harry asked, rubbing a tired hand over his shoulder.
§ What else have I got to do?§
§ Good point,§ Harry agreed, conjuring a chair and a cup which he filled with water to sooth his parched throat. § Might as well make ourselves comfy.§
---
She walked briskly down the corridor where Harry lurked in waiting. As she walked by he snatched her arm and tugged her inside the alcove. Her face was more angry than surprised or scared and Harry drew a deep breath feeling uncertain.
"Potter--"
He clamped a hand over her mouth, fighting his body's reaction to her nearness, struggling for words. She tried jerking her arm away, but Harry held it ever more tightly.
"Hermione, you have to see that he's no good for you," he begged, hating the tone his voice took on. "You're dying Hermione. Can't you see it?"
She made a muffled noise beneath his hand and he cautiously slipped it away.
"Don't be ridiculous," she said primly.
"This isn't you, Hermione!" he countered gruffly.
"Like you would know who I am," Hermione spat. "You know nothing Potter."
"You're right," he agreed, eyes hardening. "I don't know you at all. You're not the Hermione I thought I you were, but I do know he's only using you. Why can't you see that?"
"You bastard!" she hissed angrily. "Daniel is perfect--" she yanked her arm back roughly and glared hatefully. "You can't hold a candle to him."
"Like I would want to be compared to him of all people."
"Oh please, you're so pathetic, you crave to be him. It must kill you to know you never will be."
Angry and hurt, Harry pulled her back to him as she tried to exit the alcove. He received a sharp zap along his arm for his efforts. Cursing her, Harry glanced down and froze. There resting against the swell of her breasts was the locket.
"Where did you get that?" he asked, reaching out a trembling hand.
She smacked his hand back and clutched the locket in her fist. "I got this from Daniel for Christmas, though he tried to pass it off as if it were from you. Somehow he gathered I wouldn't receive it well if it was from him. I don't pretend to understand him, but it was the most romantic gesture."
"Hermione, you've got to trust me," Harry said shakily, staring fixedly on the small gold locket. "That locket that you're wearing is no gift. It's a Horcrux. One Daniel stole off my desk. He must have wrote a note and charmed his handwriting to be mine, that's why Hedwig took it after her hunt. You have to take it off, Hermione."
She stared incredulously at him. "Give me a break, Potter. A Horcrux? Is that the best you could do?"
"I'm not kidding Hermione! That's one of Voldemort's Horcruxes."
"Get a life," she hissed, tucking the locket back inside her blouse and robes, "and stay the hell out of mine."
"Hermione! Wait!" Harry tried to grab her again but she jerked out of his reach and ran out of the alcove and down the hall.
Harry watched her leave and felt the coldness in him coalesce into something so foreign… terror.
º«««º»»»ºEnd Chapter 30º«««º»»»º
A/N: Quotes from Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland and Looking Through the Mirror Glass were used in the first Luna/Harry scene.