Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter
A/N: Mmm'kay. Giant thanks to my wonderful friend Afton for the chapter title. More giant thanks to the wonderful talianne who beta-ed and to the wonderful Lang for looking over it first and reassuring me… actually, thank you to both of you because you brought me out of a block! *huggles both of you* Yay! Ok, most of this chapter is a flashback. Hopefully it'll be… well, not what you expected but I hope you like it. If you did expect it… lol meh. Please review! Oh… and excuse the American comment down there… I'm just kinda sick and tired of people who try to integrate America into HP… Suethors particularly. And they have British people saying "mom" and it's like NO. Sorry… lol please read and review!
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The Return
Chapter Seven: Reminiscence
White, hot pain.
In his chest.
Pure pain.
It was all he felt. He gritted his teeth and made a strangled groan in the back of his throat, curling into the foetal position, rocking forwards and backwards to try to make the pain subside, even a little.
"Harry."
That voice… so familiar. But… not so familiar at the same time.
"Come on honey," the voice whispered. Harry suddenly felt a pair of hands attempt to roll him over onto his back. "Oh dear. You really did get into a fight, didn't you?"
Harry opened his eyes slightly and squinted up at the person. He frowned slightly, looking at beautiful, long red hair. "Mum?" he managed to croak, opening his eyes properly.
She came into focus and he saw her smiling sadly, "Hello Harry."
Harry looked around; there wasn't much to look at actually. It was pretty bright, and all he could make out was a single blood red couch a little further away from him. He looked back at his mother, "Where am I?"
"Well, you're not dead," she said, standing up. She helped Harry up and slowly helped him over to the couch.
"That would explain why I'm in so much pain," Harry winced, feeling as though his chest wanted to cave in on itself.
Lily smiled and helped Harry lie down on the couch, before sitting down the end his head was at, and placing it on her lap. "I'm so sorry Harry, and I would do something about that pain if I could," she said, brushing his messy hair away from his face. She smiled sadly again and said, "But it's not time for you to die yet."
"Then where am I?" he asked.
"I suppose you could call it a… sort of Limbo," she slowly, glancing around. "See, that window leads to eternal damnation," she said, pointing at a floor length window, with yellow flames dancing around behind the glass. "And that one," she pointed to another floor length window, with pure white light flooding in to the room, "Leads to… well, I suppose it leads to heaven," she said, shrugging slightly.
"Where did you come from?" Harry asked, raising one eyebrow.
Lily smiled and glanced at the window with the bright light flooding through. "I can't tell you that Harry."
He nodded and winced slightly as a sharp stabbing pain was felt in his abdomen. "Why am I here?" he asked through gritted teeth.
"Because someone tried to kill you and didn't succeed fully," she said softly, glancing down his body and wincing as she noticed the large blood stains on his shirt.
"But I killed Voldemort," Harry said confusedly, frowning slightly. "Don't tell me I didn't," he groaned, gritting his teeth again and clutching at his stomach as another sharp stabbing pain was felt there.
"No honey, calm down. Voldemort is dead," she said quickly, placing a hand on top of his head and rubbing his forehead with a thumb. "Your world is free."
Harry nodded and relaxed slightly, "Good." He grimaced again and asked, "How did I get here?"
Lily paused, looking slightly uncertain. "People end up here when… they die… but they don't. Voldemort ended up here for a while after he killed me and your father, when you defeated him then."
"That's why no one could find him for so long," Harry said suddenly.
His mother nodded, "He was here for nine years in your world's time before he found a way to break out. He returned as an apparition."
"Does that mean if I go back I'll be like him?"
Lily smiled, "No. Voldemort appeared here without anyone to guide him. We knew you were coming so I was sent down to wait for you."
"We?"
Lily smiled again, "I can't tell you everything Harry."
Harry nodded, "Well, how did you know I was coming?"
"Dumbledore," she said simply.
Harry frowned, "He can contact the dead?"
"I'm not exactly sure what he did. All I know is he appeared to the… 'Big Guy Upstairs'," she shrugged, "and told him that Voldemort had found out what the prophecy really said. Voldemort cast some sort of charm on himself so that if you did manage to kill him, you would die with him."
"So, why aren't I dead yet?"
"Because Dumbledore countered it. For his silence in what happened we agreed to help you."
"His silence?"
"People down there can't know about this place. Only the people who have been here and are worthy of returning are given the choice of whether or not to say where they've been. Voldemort never said anything because he never wanted anyone to know that he had been that close to death. And the only reason he managed to escape was because he used his brain; people before him had given up within the first few hours of being here."
Harry frowned and tried to sit up. He did so, wincing as his sore muscles tensed. Once sitting and breathing a little harder than normal he reached down to raise his shirt to inspect his wounds. "Ouch," he muttered, biting down hard on his bottom lip as he peeled the shirt off his stomach. "Are you sure you can't do anything about this?" he asked Lily through gritted teeth again.
She shook her head, "I have to leave your wounds alone for Hermione to heal them when you go back."
Harry's eyes shot wide open when he heard Hermione's name, "She's still alive?" he asked quickly.
Lily smiled, "Yes."
"Is she okay?"
"She's fine Harry. The war has ended and she's trying to rebuild her shattered life," Lily said sadly, sighing heavily.
Harry breathed a sigh of relief, leaning his head back on the back of the couch, "Alright," he muttered, closing his eyes. "Do I have to go back?"
"You can go back now if you want."
Harry sighed and shrugged, slumping his shoulders. "I dunno. Would people want me to come back? I mean, I've killed Voldemort so I've served my purpose."
Lily smiled and slide across the couch to put an arm around her son, "You have more purpose than just to kill Voldemort Harry."
"Like what?" he asked dully, wincing as he softly trailed a finger along a shallow cut on the left side of his abdomen.
"Like living your life out, finding someone to love and making a family with them," Lily said, reaching down to take his hand away from his stomach. "Harry, you've got the chance to go back and start all over. Don't you want to see people like Hermione or Mrs Weasley again?"
Harry sighed, "They've lost so much because of me. I don't want to go back to face them."
"You think they'll move on and not care anymore?"
Harry nodded.
"Harry, you've known Hermione for seven years. Why would she not want you to come back?" Lily asked reasonably. "She loves you, even now. I know before you left you two told each other how you felt." Harry blushed slightly and Lily laughed, "I think it's great you've got someone like Hermione."
"How do you know she loves me?" Harry asked, almost helplessly.
"You don't know something like that. You can feel it whenever you look at them, whenever you talk to them. When you touch them," Lily trailed off, gazing at the blank wall. She shook her head slightly and looked back at Harry, "We did watch you two, you know. All of that running around you did in your sixth year made your father so frustrated."
"Dad? Can I see him?" Harry asked, sitting up slightly.
Lily bit her lip and shook her head, "I'm the only one allowed down here until you leave."
"Oh. Okay," Harry sighed, sitting back.
"He loves you Harry," Lily said softly, rubbing Harry's shoulder softly. "He wanted to come down but only one person was allowed."
Harry nodded and moved his shirt a little further up, over his chest and past the place Voldemort had placed his hand. There, his skin was scarred; a burn scar in the shape of Voldemort's hand.
Lily winced as she saw it, "He tried to do the same thing you did to him," she said softly.
"I know," Harry said, not daring to touch it.
"There's another reason you're here Harry. I mean, apart from the fact Voldemort cast that charm of his and we countered it," Lily said suddenly, as though she had just remembered it.
"So?"
"When you defeated Voldemort the first time, he accidentally… gave you some of his powers. Since you didn't actually kill him then, that power didn't do much, except give you the ability to speak Parseltongue. When you killed him, the explosion of magic from within him washed over you," she said, sighing softly. "You're ten times stronger than you were before you… ended up here."
Harry frowned and said slowly, "Okay."
"Which means you're going to have to exercise a lot more control over your magic," his mother added quickly. "You'll sense when people apparate in and you can, essentially, read minds like Voldemort did."
Harry's mind cast back to the end of his fourth year when Voldemort told him his 'real family' was returning, just before the Death Eaters apparated in the grave yard. He sighed and said, "So I've got Voldemort's powers now."
Lily nodded.
"Great," Harry said unenthusiastically.
"Are you alright?" Lily asked tentatively.
"You mean apart from the fact I almost died, I have these serious wounds on my body and I just found out I have Voldemort's power?" Harry asked, looking up at her. "I'm fantastic mum."
Lily couldn't help but smile, "Oh Harry. It's really not that bad. You're still alive and you can go back to Hermione."
"What about the media?"
"You'll deal with that when the time comes," Lily said firmly. "It'll be okay."
Harry nodded and leaned over to kiss his mother on the cheek. "Thanks mum," he whispered.
She smiled and hugged him before allowing him to sit back in the couch. "Do you want to go home now?"
Harry breathed in deeply and then let his breath out slowly through his mouth, "Yes."
"A lot of time will have passed when you arrive back there. When I asked you if you wanted to go back, only six months had passed. A lot more time has passed than that though, but I'm not sure how much." She paused, "I'm sending you to Hermione's living room floor. You won't be able to say any other words than the one you think of most for a while."
Harry nodded and watched his mother stand up in front of him to help him up. Once he was standing with Lily holding his hands, she smiled one last time and said, "I love you Harry. And I'm so proud of you."
Then… everything went black for a moment. Harry could feel his body begin to shake violently and soon felt very wet and very cold. He screamed out as his chest contracted and then he felt himself collapse on the ground.
"H-H-Hermione."
"I'm here."
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During Harry's story, Hermione had helped him back to the couch and gave him the blanket they had slept under the night before. Once he was finished, she found herself sitting there, almost in shock.
"You don't know how frustrating it was to not be able to say anything else," Harry remarked, drawing the blanket closer to his body. "I mean, I do love your name but I just wanted to say what I wanted."
Hermione nodded vaguely, gazing past the wall, her eyes slightly glazed over.
"Hermione?"
"My name is the word you think of most?" she asked softly, focusing her eyes back on Harry.
Harry smiled and nodded, "Yeah."
Hermione smiled back and leaned into him, slipping her arms around his waist. "I'm still angry at you for what you did to Mark though," she said softly, but firmly.
He sighed, "I'm sorry. I should have more control."
"You should," Hermione said, looking up at him, "But now I know why you've got that power, I think I'll let it go for now. My only problem is that everyone knows for sure that you're back now. And Mark might send in Aurors on us."
"No he won't," Harry said, shrugging, "The story is too good for me to be locked up. They wouldn't be able to keep me confined anyway," he added as an afterthought.
Hermione was silent for a moment before asking tentatively, "Could you make the sea 'swallow the land whole'?"
Harry grinned apologetically, "Sorry, I was being a little overdramatic. I could cause a small tsunami though."
She nodded, seeming satisfied with his answer. "Do you think the world deserves to know how you came back?" she asked.
He sighed and shrugged, "I dunno. What if people try to use it to their advantage?"
"Then what will you tell them?"
"That I've been cooling down in America?" Hermione threw him a disdainful look and he smiled apologetically, "Come on, nothing happens over there."
Hermione couldn't help but smile and poked his stomach softly, "Seriously Harry."
"Seriously? I have no idea," he said, shrugging. "You're really the only one I want knowing where I was. And maybe Molly and Ginny, but that's it."
She smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek softly, "Then how about we just say that you have no idea where you were, or how you got back. And all you want to do is get on with your life?"
Harry grinned and leaned down to kiss her lips, "Alright." He stiffened slightly as he sensed someone about to appear in the room. "Someone's coming," he said quickly, frowning.
A second later, ten loud cracks sounded and the room was filled with hooded wizards surrounding the couch, all pointing their wands at Harry.
"Move away from Potter, Hermione," the voice of Mad Eye Moody sounded behind one of the hoods.
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To be continued…