Chapter Eight
Nothing's Perfect
Author's Note: I'm sorry the updates are so few and far apart. School is rough and inspiration for my
Harry Potter fan fictions has been dwindling. But those who are still reading need not fear, I will not abandon!
I've been rereading my favorite Sophie Kinsella books, and for those of you who know her writing, you'll
understand why it provides inspiration for this story. Hope you all like chapter eight!
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The more I think about it, the more I like the idea.
Don't get me wrong, I do want a magical wedding- magic is such a big part of my life- but I am a muggle, born and raised.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table, a bunch of wedding magazine clippings, photographs, brochures, and lists scattered in front of me. I sigh, dazzled by all the beautiful ideas, thrown into a strange vertigo. I can't tell this wedding planner, Megan, that I want to incorporate magic into my wedding. What would she say to that? Suggest a fairy and unicorn theme? Oh bloody hell, what am I going to do? Team Megan and Amber Deyn up and see what happens?
Taking a deep breath, I decide to sort out the facts.
I know I want a magical wedding. But I also want a wedding that my muggle family and friends can attend. I don't want them to be charmed to forget the magical parts, though. I also want something that doesn't have to be too difficult- you know, concerning keeping the guests away from each other so the wizards don't ask why the muggles aren't wearing robes or something.
There's a half-knock at my door and it opens. Harry walks in, looking slightly disheveled and tired. He coughs as he enters, running a hand through his hair.
"Hermione?" he walks into the kitchen, looks at all the wedding rubbish in front of me and smirks a little. "What's all this?"
I roll my eyes, "Don't ask."
"Are you about ready to leave?" he asks.
I nod, standing up to retrieve my bag near the couch, as we leave the flat and stand in the lift Harry sighs a little.
I turn to look at him, seeing just how tired he looks, "Are you okay? How was work?"
"Wretched," he grumbles. "I'm being screwed over, I know it," he shakes his head.
"What do you mean?" I ask, and I'm about to start up another sentence before he cuts me off.
He shakes his head, "Let's just not talk about it, okay?"
Clearly he's had a really crap day, so I'm not going to press it. Besides, we're on our way to Ron's
for a nice dinner with all of our friends and I don't want to spoil the evening. When we get there Harry will relax
and start to have a good time with his friends, then tomorrow, after he's gone without thinking about work for
awhile, maybe then we'll talk about it. If he wants to. Gosh, he really does look tired and stressed.
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The table is filled with all of our friends. Ron is sitting at the head of the table, playing host and laughing loudly, helping Luna every once in awhile. Neville is here, sitting with his girlfriend, Michelle, laughing quietly while sipping his water. Bill and Fleur are sitting close together, with his arm slung around the back of her chair, their daughter, Patrice, in Fleur's lap. Charlie is here with his kids as well, but his wife, Margot, is away on business in Albania. Fred is here with one of his girlfriends, cracking jokes and insisting everyone have 'just one more' glass of Firewhiskey. And George is here with his wife, Lucy, as well, teasing everyone and discreetly talking business with Fred. The only person who hasn't arrived yet is Ginny.
"That's not how it happened!" Ron shouts as he places a basket of rolls on the table for Luna. "I did not turn my pants completely into chocolate, maybe just one leg!"
Bill laughs, "We were all so proud though- despite the cocopants- because we knew Ron was not magically deficient!"
Fleur is giggling but she reproachfully slaps Bill's knee.
The whole table is actually in stitches over Bill's story of Ron's late-magic problem. Apparently he had no magical occurrences before he was six, leading his parents to believe he wouldn't be able to do magic at all. That is, until his seventh birthday when he begged his mum for some extra chocolate, on top of his eating the majority of his birthday cake. When she refused him he grew so angry that, apparently, he turned his trousers into a chocolate mess. I find the story hilarious, it's so essentially Ron that I'm nearly crying in hysterics. I turn to see if Harry is laughing as hard as I am, but I see he's only sitting there, smiling politely, pinching the material of his napkin.
As Ron and Bill break into a joking argument over the whole scenario I discreetly lean toward Harry, put my hand on his knee and whisper, "Are you all right?"
He looks as if he's realizing himself and says, "Yeah, I'm fine."
"Are you sure?" I ask. "You don't seem-"
"Dinner!"
Our conversation breaks off as Luna starts serving dinner. As we all begin eating and chatting again, Harry loosens up a little and starts to act more like himself. He and Ron tell an amusing story about the conversation they had when Luna told Ron she was pregnant with Ioan. Ron reveals that he and Harry had a conversation about what kind of kids they wanted when they were bored in fifth year. We're all having such a good time that I'm sure Harry's forgotten all about work, but then I see him grow quiet every few minutes, and I'm also sickly reminded of Grandmother and the dilemma I'm finding myself in.
Suddenly, the front door opens and Ginny rushes in.
"Sorry guys!" she says quickly, pulling out her chair and taking a seat between Neville and me. She looks flustered and wide-eyed. Her hair is a mess and her eyes are bright, she's a little out of breath and her lip gloss is smeared all around her mouth. "I got tied up at.... What?" she trails off and asks, when she notices we've all gone quiet and we're staring at her awkwardly.
Ron, of course, breaks the silence, "Gin, you have lipstick all over your mouth."
Her eyebrows crease in confusion for a moment and then she realizes, puts a hand to her mouth and wipes it all away.
"I had a-a-an apple on the w-way here," she says, tingeing pink. "I guess it got a little messy."
Fred and George snicker and Bill says, "Uh-huh, sure you did."
Luna takes a sip of her pumpkin juice and graciously changes the subject for poor Ginny, "Oh Hermione, Harry, I forgot to ask you guys how your meeting with Amber went."
I look at Harry as he says, "It went really well."
"She's very nice, and quite insightful.... Only, I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with charming the muggles at our wedding."
Fred interjects, "Why not?"
"I don't want them to have an altered perception of our wedding," I say uncomfortably. "It just seems strange to me."
Fleur daintily sips her wine, and then asks, "But you are still 'aving a magical wedding, yes?"
"I want to," I nod. "But I wish it was less complicated."
"Just don't have muggles there," George offers.
I look at him, appalled, "We're talking about my family here!"
"You can't have a true magical ceremony with muggles there without having them charmed," Bill tells us. "It's impossible."
This makes my heart sink and deflate sickeningly.
Harry speaks up now, "We're definitely having a magical ceremony though."
"But I want my family there, without stupid charms on all of them!" I say, growing desperate.
"Some of your family knows your a witch, invite them," Neville says, trying his best to help.
I shake my head, "I couldn't do that, what would I tell my other family members? And my muggle friends?"
"That you eloped," Fred puts in, as if it's all too obvious.
"I want them to see me get married."
Ron puts an extra roll on Ioan's plate, saying, "I talked to Seamus about his wedding, he said he and his wife didn't invite anyone except the best man and the maid of honor. Said it was the best decision they've ever made," he nods toward us. "He said the magical ceremony was so great, that it was so worth it to not have anyone there at all."
Don't they understand that would mean not inviting my cousins and my aunts and uncles, the people I want there! And what about Grandmother? What am I supposed to do about her and her wedding planner? Maybe Harry will be able to figure it out. I can't bring it up now though, not in front of everyone.
"Oh, you can't do without having a magical ceremony," Luna tells us confidently. "It goes deeper than any muggle wedding could go. Your souls feel like they're being connected," a severely dreamy look clouds her face and she takes hold of Ron's hands.
Geez.
I'm about to speak when Harry says, "There's no doubt we're having a magical wedding."
"Well, I don't know," I say. "No matter what anyone says about magical ceremonies, I grew up muggle, and so did Harry, a muggle ceremony would be just fine-"
Harry looks angry, he cuts me off, "Hermione, our lives are based in the magical world. We can't not have a magical ceremo-"
"Harry, our lives have always been based in both worlds."
"Well," he says, sounding peeved. "The muggle world hasn't always done me right, and I don't know if I want to be married the muggle way."
I feel stung.
I clear my throat, "Harry, I am muggle-born," I shake my head, feeling so confused and hurt. "It's my life."
"Your life is also in the magical world, you can't expect to always live in both," he says heatedly.
I look around the table and see everyone looks baffled and a little tense. No one wants to watch two people argue or fight, especially over such a private topic, but they're all being subjected to it. Feeling my face burn with anger and slight embarrassment, I clear my throat. Why is Harry being so mean? We both discussed it and said we wanted a muggle-friendly but also magical wedding. Now, all of a sudden he's turning his back on the muggle part, the part that matters almost more than the magical part does to me. I grew up a muggle, I am muggle-born, it's my childhood, it's my family, I can't have that part of me excommunicated from my life. But we can't argue over this now, we'll have to figure it out later.
I shake my head, "It'll all work itself out somehow."
I look up and meet Ron's eyes. I shoot him a 'help me!' look.
"So, Gin, tell us about that rendezvous you had with that apple," he says, steering the conversation clear away from Harry and I.
I shoot him a grateful smile and he discreetly winks at me.
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The car ride back to my flat has been tense and silent. I can tell Harry's still a little angry about work and the argument we had on top of that, so he hasn't spoken. I've thought about it, and I understand that his childhood was horrible because of muggles, but it's not fair to take away any chance of my family and friends going to our wedding because it's magical. It's all so confusing.
Clearing my throat, I say, "Harry, I know your muggle life wasn't exactly idyllic because of muggles, but I want my family and friends at our wedding."
"The magical world saved my life, Hermione," he says curtly. "It's who I am and I'm not going to get married any other way."
It's like a slap to the face, his being this angry.
"Well, the muggle-world is my life and I'm not going to ignore that!" I shout, feeling my anger rise. "Why are you changing your mind all of a sudden? We discussed all of this already!"
He rolls his eyes, "It's my wedding too, Hermione, I'm allowed to make some decisions as well!"
"Yeah but you're not making one this big alone!" I turn my whole body so I'm facing him in the passenger seat. "It's not fair!"
He shakes his head, "What's wrong with charming the muggles?"
"Harry!" I hiss, disgusted. "It's my family, I don't want to lie to them that way-"
"You're already lying to them about being a witch," he says acidly. "What's the difference?"
I swallow, "That's different."
"No it's not," he yells. "You can't be so demonstrative when it comes to something so difficult to figure out."
"Demonstrative?" I ask, incredulous. "I'm being demonstrative because I want my family at my wedding without putting a spell on them?"
He doesn't say anything.
I sit back in my seat, staring ahead, "You're just being bloody ridiculous."
"I'm not being ridiculous," he rolls his eyes. "I'm being realistic! You're being difficult and-"
"You're being selfish!"
He looks at me and then sets his eyes back on the road, "Sure I am," he replies sarcastically.
I shake my head, disbelievingly, "You are! You're not thinking of me, of the fact that my family and friends mean a lot to me and I want them there, uncharmed!" I'm breathing hard with rage and I say, "You're only thinking of the three muggles you knew who were horrible. They don't have to be there, it's just the muggle ceremony I'd like-"
"So you just want to disregard the magic ceremony completely," he pulls up in front of my apartment building and turns to me with a harsh look in his eyes. "Is that what you're saying?"
I shrink away from his gaze for a moment but then sit up straighter, more defiant, "That's not what I'm saying, and you know it-"
He cuts me off, shaking his head and throwing his hands up in surrender, "I can't deal with this right now."
"Harry, this is just a-"
"Can you please get out?" he says curtly. "I'd like to go home."
My mouth falls open in shock.
He glances at me and I fumble for the handle, gulping down my hurt. I swiftly get out of the car and sort of slam the door shut, stepping onto the sidewalk. He pulls away quickly and I find myself shaking with adrenaline and anger. I make my way inside and into the lift, and as it moves up I'm hitting the heel of my palm against the side of my leg, twitching and fidgeting the whole way up. Of course Harry and I have fought and argued before, but not over something so big. Is this going to jeopardize the whole wedding, because we don't know what kind of wedding to have? If it was a fight about anything else I wouldn't even think about this, but because it's about the wedding itself I'm not sure. I find myself cringing and biting my lip, scared and confused.
Why does everything always have to be so complicated?
Author's Note: I know, not very romantic, but it's realistic, and I don't want their relationship to be all ridiculous sunshine and roses. Granted, Harry was a little mean, but, if you haven't figured out why, that'll be explained in the next chapter. Thanks for reading! Sorry the update took so long to post!