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Leaving the Past Behind by harry_mione_love
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Leaving the Past Behind

harry_mione_love

A/N: It's raining. I'm watching it through the window. It rains a lot. Duh, it's England. Yuck. I hate the rain. Never mind, I love the rain. But only when I want it. Now, I don't want it. I hear the thunder and lightning. Forgive me if my mood is sour.

First of all, I have to say I almost threw up when I reread chapter 3 of this story, how could make that `becoming our friends' scene any cheesier? Geez, you can def tell my writing style has improved a bit from then. If I could rewrite that part I would. Gross. Maybe later, but for now…

Oh, and by the by, I just wanted to clarify that the Michael Ferris/Hermione scene was NOT a rape scene. She was not raped. Just roughed up. Just needed to make that clear, that's an important thing to understand! Love ya. Enjoy!

OO. And to Tiger: (Lol, hey girl…I'm emailing you, I'm perfectly fine with telling the story )

By the by: Madeleine in my language (ha) is pronounced Mad-A-LIN

~*~

Ill be there for you
these five words I swear to you
when you breathe I want to be the air for you
Ill be there for you
Id live and Id die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
Ill be there for you

--"I'll be there for you" By Bon Jovi

~*~

"I never liked Michael Ferris," Lilly said, anger seething through her voice.

"I don't think, you're the only one," Harry commented.

"So, he just, attacked her? No reasoning what so ever?" Lilly asked.

"There is never an excuse or reason to attack Hermione!" Harry exclaimed, stopping pacing to stare at her.

"You know what I mean, Harry! Did he tell you what" Lilly said, holding her son by the shoulders.

"He was having a bad day," Harry said softly. "And he just…attacked her."

Lilly dropped to her desk chair. They were alone in the Charm's classroom talking about the incident between Michael and Hermione earlier that day. After dinner, Lilly had led Harry back to the classroom and almost demanded that he tell her everything.

"It was horrible, mum. Horrible. Her cuts were really bad. Pomfrey said she nearly had a broken wrist. She was shaking, scared to death…and her eyes, god, you should've seen them. He hurt her so badly. Her own father hurt her so badly. I won't let it happen again. It won't happen. No one will hurt her again," He said firmly

"Oh Harry," Lilly stood up.

"No one," He said again, shaking his head.

"Harry," Lilly took, her son in her arms. "I know… I know…"

"No one," Harry held tight on his mother.

Lilly felt tears roll down her cheeks. "I love you Harry," Lilly reminded her son.

"I love you, too, mum." He responded.

She held tears back and hugged him before pulling back.

"She let me touch her," Harry said. "I reached out to her, and she hugged me. She let me hold her."

"She trusts you," Lilly smiled. Harry nodded. "Be careful with her. Don't betray that trust," Lilly warned

"I would never," Harry's look darkened. "I will never hurt her."

"I know that, Harry, I Just want you to be careful around her." Lilly was amazed at the look on his face. It was a dark look; almost like he wanted to strangle her for even thinking such a thing.

"I will, I will, always," Harry promised.

Lilly nodded. "Does she know you know yet?"

Harry shook his head. "I don't want to tell her. I don't want her to feel…uncomfortable. Our friendship is new, and I don't want to screw it up."

"I understand. But if the right moment comes, tell her. Don't let it be the secret holding back. She doesn't need another secret in her life," Lilly said.

"What are you talking about?" a now very confused Harry asked.

Lilly's eyes widened and she shook her head. "Nothing, nothing. I meant nothing by it."

Harry narrowed his eye sat her but let it slip. "I will."

"Good, well then, dear, please get back to the tower. I'll see in the morning." Lilly said. "Goodnight."

"Night mum," He hugged her.

"Good night, Harry James," She bad him as he walked away. She leaned against her desk in thought. She hadn't brought it up, but she had a feeling that Harry could fall hard for this girl. If he hadn't already. She had never seen such determination in his eyes or the dark look he got at the thought that anyone would hurt her.

But Hermione was fragile; he needed to handle her with great care. She had to admit she wanted to hex Michael Ferris into oblivion herself, but she knew she would never have to. Not with Harry James Potter standing in the way of Hermione. She wasn't worried as long as Hermione had Harry. She had advised Harry not to go to McGonagall with this `little incident'. Yes, McGonagall would probably try to expel him, but Michael's father is in the ministry and with his power it would end up making things harder for Harry, Hermione, and the school.

Sighing, she set off upstairs and off to bed.

Lying there, she knew there was still one thing they hadn't talked about; Harry's abuse. It haunted her for years and she couldn't even imagine how Harry felt. He had avoided the subject for a long time. Eventually, they would have to talk. But for now, for now, she wouldn't push him.

Hermione lay in bed on her back, her eyes gazing at the ceiling as her body lay under he covers. All that she could think of was Michael Ferris and her hidden scars. Then Harry's face. His protective instinct around her, his concern, his care. Like no one else had ever cared for here. And he was teaching her magic. Magic@ Not stilly, nothings...magic@ Tomorrow, Harry Potter would teach her, and she would learn. Now that she was ready, it was time to start.

"But I don't wanna go to Timmy Westlake's' house!" Emma whined to Hermione.

"Emma, you are going. Like it, or not. I have something to do!" Hermione said.

"But Hermione!" Emma complained.

This time, Hermione was done. She stamped her foot. "Emma Katherine Granger you will stop whining, march your bum upstairs and get read! Because we are leaving in five minutes! Like it or not!"

Emma looked very surprised at her sister's outburst. She snapped into shape and marched upstairs just as instructed. Hermione, who was seated at the kitchen table, put her head in her hands and examined the very intricate wooden patterns. She didn't know what she was getting herself into.

Hermione had to meet Harry in twenty minutes at Hogwarts and had to drop Emma off so that she didn't have to take Emma with her. Before Hermione left yesterday, Harry had agreed to meet her at 7:30pm. It was now 7:20pm. "Uh, come on, Emma!" She groaned loudly just as her sister bounced down the stairs.

"I'm here! I'm ready!" Emma said.

"Thank Merlin," Hermione said.

"Let's go," Hermione led her out.

On the walk to Tommy's house, Emma asked curiously. "Where are you going tonight, anyway?"

"Nowhere," Hermione said.

"What are you going to do there?" Emma inquired further.

"Nothing!" Hermione exclaimed, annoyed.

"Is it illegal?" Emma asked.

"No!" Hermione yelled. "Just Shut UP!"

"Sorry," Emma apologized quietly.

"Whatever," Hermione shook her head impatiently.

They didn't speak at all the rest of the time till they got to the Westlake's. When they did reach the front door, it was just a quiet goodbye. The tension was so thick; you could cut it with a knife. Hermione knew it wasn't nice to be acting so rudely to her own little sister, but she and her sister rarely fought like this and her sister could get really annoying. It seemed sometimes she was searching for ways to drive Hermione crazy.

Hermione snuck carefully through the halls of the castle. It took some careful planning to get through the gates, but then she had to get up to the appropriate floor unseen. Once she reached the top floor, she saw Harry pacing, probably waiting for her to arrive.

"Harry?" She called to him. He turned to face her and a smile slowly appeared on his face.

"Hermione, hey." He greeted her, walking to her.

"I'm sorry, I'm late, Emma was giving me a hard time and it took longer than I though and then..." Hermione started explaining.

"Sh, Hermione, it's okay," Harry smiled, grabbing her by the arms, to slow her down.

Hermione smiled. "Okay. Um, so..." she gestured toward the invisible door to the room of requirement.

"Right," Harry said. He paced in front of the door thinking for a minute.

A door appeared and he opened it for Hermione to enter first and walked in after. He walked in and watched her as she looked at the room in awe.

"You like it?" He asked.

"It's amazing," Hermione breathed. "I've always read about this room, but this is the first time I've ever really seen it."

He nodded. The room was pretty amazing. This time it was a room that had two parts to it. One section was more comfortable with seating, but the other half was a bit stonier. The seating section was decorated with deep reds and browns, a fire place lighting the room, with a large couch in the corner. The stony part was a bit colder, but it was large enough to perform dueling spells in, yet small enough to feel comfortable with only two people.

"So..." Hermione walked around. "Where do we start?"

"Well, I dunno. Um, you wanna show me that levitating spell you learned."

"Right, okay," She looked around and found a feather to her right. "This really is a strange room," She mumbled. "Okay, here goes," She pulls out her wand.

"Wingardium Leviosa!" She lifted the feather perfectly in the air and played around with it a little before letting it down.

"Perfect, "He said, satisfied. "And I said your cleaning spell already. What do you wanna learn?"

"Something useful," She said. "Something defensive and tough. No more easy ones."

"No more easy ones?" He asked, uneasily.

"Yes, I don't want to learn unlocking charms or silencing charms, I can learn that on my own if I really want to! I don't know which spells I want to learn...but I don't know, what did you teach them in fifth year during the DA?" Hermione asked curiously.

Harry looked surprised. "Hermione...I don't know...those spells were tough for fifth years who had been doing spells and taking magical education for five years...some even more. Even they suffered. I don't-"

"What, you don't think I can handle it?" Hermione quirked an eyebrow, hand on her hip.

Harry took a deep breath. "I'm sure you can handle it, but-"

"Okay then, teach, teacher," Hermione's face brightened, standing straight up again.

"Merlin," He breathed under his breath. He thought for a moment. "Are you sure? I mean, I can think of one to teach you, but most didn't learn it till fifth year...it could be hard."

She nodded. "I'm ready. What is it?"

"Okay. It's called the disarming spell."

"Disarming? Like, to take someone's wand?" Hermione asked.

"Right," He nodded. "It knocks their wand, and if done correctly, can make their wand fly straight to you hand. A"

Hermione nodded again. "Alright. Go."

He smiled. "Okay. I'm going to show you by doing it to you." He moved away from her and they faced each other.

"Expelliarmus!" He pointed his wand at her. Apparently, it had too much force on it, and not only did he get her wand, But caused her to fall over.

"Oof," she hit the floor.

He walked to her and took her hand, helping her up. "Sorry," He apologized. "I didn't mean to. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, "She steadied herself.

"Are you sure?" He pushed.

"I'm okay, Harry," she laughed.

"Just being sure," he smiled. "It's kind of difficult, so don't get discouraged if you didn't get it the first time."

"c'mon. Let's go," She ordered, ignoring all sense of doubt. They moved apart.

She took a deep breath and flicked her wand in the appropriate matter, "Expelliarmus!" In a flash, his wand landed in her palm. "Whoa," She breathed.

"Bloody Hell, Hermione," Harry said. "What are you?"

"I Just...did what you did, and it worked!" She was stunned and a grin spread across her face.

"I've never seen anyone, pickup on that, so quickly," Harry was still awe struck that Hermione had just disarmed. He was to totally unprepared, excepting her to screw up the first time. "You are a natural."

"Thanks," Her smile widened. It still hadn't really hit her that she had just preformed such a spell.

Harry, shaking his head back into reality, asked, "Do you, uh, want to try again?" He asked.

She nodded and they took their respectable positions. "Expelliarmus!" this time Harry shielded it but he could tell the power of Hermione's spell.

She smiled again at the realization she had just done it again. He smiled at the sparkle in her eyes and the happiness that radiated through her, that was what sparked the happiness in him.

"That was absolutely brilliant," Harry told her.

They practice the spell several times successfully before Harry accidentally knocked over Hermione with a strong shield.

"Sorry, again," He helped her up.

"Its fine," She shrugged out of breath. "Geez. I'm kinda tired," She sank into the couch nearby.

"Yeah, well you did well. I'm proud of you," He said, sitting next to her. Her head snapped up and she stated at him, eyes wide.

"Really?" Hermione asked.

HE nodded. "Of course. That's a tough spell. What?"

She smiled a little. "No one's ever told me that before," she said softly.

They held eye contact for a minute before Hermione was forced to look down from the intensity of his gaze. "Well, I'm very proud of you," He repeated quietly.

She leaned back and closed her eyes. "Thank you for teaching me. I know you have better things to do..."

"Hey," He said. "There is no where else I'd rather be. You deserve a change in this world, Hermione. You deserve a chance."

They sat in silence for a moment, until Harry broke it. "My mum really likes you, you know?"

"Really? She does?" Hermione looked up at him through her eyelashes, a look that made Harry's heart unconsciously stop.

"Yeah, yeah," Harry said, recovering. "I've never seen her take to someone so quickly."

"Not even Lillian?" Hermione said, with a bit of crude in her voice.

"You don't like Lillian?" Harry asked, confused.

"No, no...I like her, a lot. She just seemed like the Golden girl. I thought your mum would love her...I thought she was your girlfriend until I met Madeleine..." Hermione sighed.

Harry began laughing a little too hard and at Hermione's look of confusion he explained. "Hermione, I would never, ever date Lillian."

"What? Why?" Hermione asked, confused.

"Hermione, Lillian is my cousin," Harry explained, calming his laughter.

"Your cousin?" Hermione asked a little embarrassed with herself.

"Yes, my cousin. A second cousin on my father's side... I don't know, something confusing like that. All I know is that somehow she is my family and I would never date anyone in my family. She's a great friend, though, don't get me wrong. When I met her here, she was kind of considered an outcast, you know? Like everyone thought she was a freak...but she's a great person." Harry further told her.

"Oh, wow," Hermione sighed. "Sorry. I just thought..."

"It's fine...you wouldn't know." Harry smiled. "But my mum really does like you...a lot."

"I like her, too," Hermione told him, smiling back. "She's really nice. I've met a lot of adults in my life...spent a lot of time around them..." Her face went blank. "But anyway, I really like her a lot."

"Good. She...you know, has her days. But when I saw her today, and when I told her...about Ferris," Harry swallowed and his voice went dark for a minute. "I've never seen her so emotional."

"She's a wonderful teacher," Hermione commented.

"Yeah, she's great," Harry smiled to himself, proud of his mother.

"I only wish I had been here all seven years to hear her teach," Hermione's face saddened.

Harry studied her carefully again; her facial expressions, her voice. He used this strange moment of silence to watch her gestures and emotions. Hermione shifted in her seat and her sleeve rolled up a little to reveal a deep scar on her shoulder.

"Merlin, Hermione," He reached up to touch it.

She started at his touch and covered it up. "What happened? This wasn't from Michael, I know that."

"It's...nothing. Absolutely nothing. You know, its late. I should-" she stood up.

"Hermione," he grabbed her arm and she jumped. "Did your father do that to you?"

She stared at him for a minute. "How do you know about my father?"

"I-I, Remus. Remus told me," he answered softly.

She slowly and carefully sat back down. "R-Remus told you?"

"Its not his fault, Hermione. Don't be mad at him. I practically forced him to. I was worried about you. I went to him one night, and i begged him to tell me." His expression hardened. "About your dad and how he hurt you..."

Tears rolled down her cheeks. "Everything?" Harry nodded.

"I'm sorry, I had to know." His voice was strained. She nodded. "And then-yesterday, when Ferris-" his fists curled.

"It brought back so many bad memories," she cried harder.

"I know, I know. I wanted to strangle him. I wanted to beat the hell out of him, Hermione," he looked pained.

"The look in your eyes scared me," Hermione said through her tears.

"It scared me, too," Harry said softly.

"Why does every guy want to hurt me?" She asked, crying.

"Oh god," He reached to her and she let him hug her again. "Not all guys. Remus never hurt you, I've never hurt you." He told her.

"Yet." She said, without thinking.

He pulled back and looked her square in the eye, holding her by her shoulders. "Don't you dare think I would ever hurt you. Never, Hermione Granger, never. I am not your father. I am not Michael Ferris. I will never hurt you. I swear it, Hermione. Never, ever. And I won't let anyone hurt you again either. If I'm around, no one will so much as think it. You do not deserve it. It is not your fault. Not at all. Not all men are like that, I know its hard, but I need you to trust me, Hermione. Believe that what I say is true. I know your mum is hard, but she cares about you. Your sister does. Remus cares about you. My mum does, too. I care about you. I' m here, love, I'm not going anywhere," He said to her.

She sniffled again, tears streaming down her face. Everything he had just said to her was new. Maybe she did need to trust him more. She was scared, terrified, that she's get hurt again. But something inside told Hermione to step out and trust him. Maybe he was speaking the truth. Whatever it was, she felt safe, and secure with Harry; comforted and warm. A feeling she'd never felt; and that scared her as well.

Why did he care so much about her anyway? What made her so special? She didn't understand. What did anyone care bout her. There's nothing special about her.

Harry smiled a little and wiped a few of her tears off.

"Thank you," She said softly, not sure what else to say.

"Can I tell you something? Do you want to know how I suspected something was wrong before Remus said a thing?"

"Why?" She asked.

"I was abused, as a child." He heard her sharp intake of breath. "Not nearly as bad as you...only two years."

"Lilly?" She breathed, although appeared to be about to stop breathing.

"No!" He exclaimed quickly. "No. No, never. It was not my mother," her body relaxed. "My aunt and uncle. I stayed with them two school years while my mum taught here. He treated me like a slave. I lived under the stairs, in a cupboard. I did all his work. I cooked, and cleaned. And he hit me, a lot. Threw me around. My cousin used me as a personal punching bag. I got beat badly. When my mum found out, there was hell to pay," He said quietly.

She covered her mouth and tears began to glisten in her eyes again. He felt a tear in his own eye. Harry had never told anyone that much about his past, ever. But he though she deserved to know the truth. After everything that had happened, it was the least she deserved. He took her hand in his.

"I know what it's like, Hermione. I'll always be here," He squeezed her hand.

"Oh, Harry," She threw herself into him in a tight hug. "Harry, I had no idea. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that you lived like that."

"Hermione, love, its okay. You lived like it for seven years. But we're both out now, Hermione. You are stronger than you think. I hate that someone ever hurt you. I hate the pain they've put you through," Harry said. "I'm so sorry."

She pulled back and he moved the sleeve of her form fitted black t-shirt up to see the scar. She almost moved to stop him but made herself hold back. He looked at her again and slowly put a finger to it. He traced the scar lightly with his finger tip. She closed her eyes and felt a strange tingling in her scar.

"No one's ever touched my scar," She told him randomly.

He glanced up and pressed a gentle kiss to it. "I wish I could take your past away," he whispered.

Opening her eyes, she saw him sitting up again, facing her. "I'm sorry for bringing this all up. I didn't mean anything by it. I just...didn't want to hide that I knew." Harry said.

"It's alright," Hermione smiled a bit. "I guess it might be good if you know. As long as-"

"I won't tell anyone. I swear. I won't say a word," Harry promised.

"Thank you," She smiled.

"Of course," He said and wiped the last of his tears.

She laughed a little and sniffled. "Well," She checked the clock. "I should go. I have to pick my sister up."

"Yeah, I guess you do," Harry stood up with her.

They walked to the door and she turned around.

"Thanks again for teaching me that spell. Will we do it again or are you tired of my drama already?" She joked.

"Never," He laughed. "Next week, same time, same place. Teaching you is easy," He winked.

She laughed and looked at him for a minute. Hermione suddenly hugged him again tightly. He was surprised but hugged her anyway.

"Thank you," She whispered. "For telling me."

He nodded and kissed her on the side of the head. "Alright," He pulled back. "Let's go. You don't wanna be late. I'll have to walk you down to make sure you aren't caught."

He pulled out a cloak and she eyed it curiously. "It's my invisibility cloak. C'mon," they got under it.

They made it almost to the gates unseen except for one incident when they had to avoid Snape. He had to push her against the wall. Her back was pressed to the wall, head turned to watch as the impending intruder past by as Harry was practically pressed up against her, hand on either side of her body, head turned in the same direction.

It was then Harry realized their close proximity and just how unnerving it was. He was standing very closely to a beautiful girl in tight, stonewashed jeans and that made his brain think some things he knew he should be. To look at her and her lips shining close to his face, it was tempting him.

But they were on the more soon and made it to the gates unseen.

"Goodbye," Hermione whispered.

"Goodbye," Harry whispered.


He watched her walk out and shook his had, smiling; wondering what his new friendship would bring next.

~*~

Hermione knocked on the door of the Westlake's, and when it opened to reveal a familiar face.

"Why, hello, servant girl," the sneering face of Michael Ferris said.

~*~

A/N: WHOA! Didn't expect that, didya?? Hehee, I'll try not to keep ya hanging too long. I know its tough, but I LOVE to leave ya with Cliffies!! Sorry, though, really. LOL!

I had to add the Harry part in there about he finding Hermione really attractive and all that to wake some of you up who thought they'd be like brother and sister and not like romantically involved. Lol, anyway...I love ya guys! Please, Please, Please, Review!


Working on CC as we speak!

NEXT CHAPTER:

*NO IDEA> haha. Lol. I really dont know what to tell you about next chapter, but what i can say is...yes, you will find out why Ferris is there!

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