If some one were to walk down the halls of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, they would see the usual students milling about. It was a Sunday, and there would only be two more days of exams to be followed by the end of term leaving feast and then departing on Wednesday. Being that it was Sunday, many of the students were holed up in the library studying, out enjoying the warm summer day, or simply having a lie in that morning before their final exams.
Normally you would count Hermione Granger among those who would be in the library. But not today. She was walking with a purpose towards the Headmaster's office, having gotten permission to speak with him that morning during breakfast. When she mentioned Harry would be with her, Dumbledore didn't seem too eager to dismiss her or pass her on to his deputy McGonagall. Harry was trailing behind her, his head hung low a bit with the realization of what he had gotten himself into and the deep-seeded fear that somehow all of this would get back to his aunt and uncle and that he'd really be in for it this time.
Hermione didn't let such thoughts enter into her head. Her single-minded focus was easily summated into two words, "Help Harry." Nothing else really mattered at the moment. It was a complete reversal from trying to distance herself by throwing herself in her studies earlier in the year. If nothing else she was repaying a debt. Harry had saved her, and the entire school, from the basilisk the year before. Now it was her turn to help him. A simple exchange, is what she told the logical side of her mind that was yelling in her ear that she should be studying right now.
As they approached the gargoyle, Hermione did not break stride, but stopped short when she stopped hearing the soft sounds of Harry following her. She tilted her head as she saw him standing there, his head hung as low as it could get without actually being on the floor, his fists clenched. He was fighting with himself to not lose it again, here outside of the safety of the Gryffindor common room, outside of the safety of Hermione's arms. Hermione walked back to him hesitantly, glancing down as she tried to look into his eyes. There, deep in those emerald orbs of his, was an emotion she was not used to seeing in Harry. He may have shown the emotion before when confronted with dementors, with a werewolf, and with any other manner of creatures that he had come across in his young life, but she had never seen it so clearly and yet so deeply ingrained in his soul at the same time.
It was fear.
Quickly she draped her arm over Harry's shoulders and gave him a reassuring squeeze. Harry looked up at her, and though no words were exchanged, he seemed to calm at her presence. Taking a deep breath, they walked toward the gargoyle protecting the headmaster's office. "Caramel Creams," Hermione clearly stated, and the statue swung out of the way. They both rode the spiral staircase up a floor or so, before stopping at the large oak door. Hermione knocked solidly three times, before receiving affirmation to enter.
Hermione had only been in the headmaster's office on one other occasion, at the beginning of term when Dumbledore had authorized McGonagall to give her the Time Turner. At that time she had been too focused on her schedule to be able to appreciate the sights of his office. Books lined all of the shelves surrounding her, save for one small mirrored cabinet to the side. On various shelves sat several silver instruments, spinning, puffing, and whirring in a kind of melodic cacophony that was oddly soothing and yet extremely annoying at the same time. To the right of the headmaster's desk was the most beautiful bird she had ever laid eyes on, though his feathers did appear to be a bit ruffled. She had never met Fawkes before, and she forgot her place for a moment to approach the bird. Fawkes offered a sharp trill, one that brought comfort to both Harry and Hermione. Hermione hesitantly reached up to stroke the birds feathers...
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Harry said in an even tone, his voice not reflecting the nervousness he was hiding inside. Hermione turned to look at him as if he'd grown a second head, but she saw the sly grin on his face. Shaking her head, she moved to touch Fawkes on the head...
....only to draw her hand back and yelp in shock when Fawkes burst into flames.
Harry let out a laugh, the first genuine laugh he'd really made in about 24 hours, and Hermione tried to offer him a disapproving glare, though the smile she was fighting was making it harder to do so. "I warned you," Harry said, shrugging his shoulders but still smiling.
"I see he finally decided to give up the ghost, to quote a muggle phrase," came a third voice from the room. The two teens stopped their laughing and immediately turned to see Albus Dumbledore emerging from a small study behind his desk. His eyes were twinkling madly as he gracefully made his way around his large chair and gave a tentative glance into the pile of ashes where Fawkes had once sat. "It's a pity you had to catch him on his burning day Miss Granger," Dumbledore said with a frown. There was a small squawk from the ash pile, and a small white chick emerged, shaking itself off and squawking again. Dumbledore laughed to himself before turning back to Harry and Hermione. He reached into his robes and pulled out a small package. "Can I interest either of you in a lemon drop?" The two teens shook their heads and pulled up a chair in front of the headmaster's desk, Hermione sitting up straight and Harry slightly slouched over, staring at his folded hands. Dumbledore cocked an eyebrow at this but said nothing. He tossed one of the candies into his mouth and placed the package back into his robes before turning towards Hermione.
"What is it that you wished to speak to me about Miss Granger. It seemed to be a matter of some urgent need." Hermione nodded and turned to Harry, who cleared his throat.
"Actually sir, I asked Hermione to come with me to....talk to you." He licked his lips and looked up at the headmaster. Dumbledore immediately noticed the tears welled up behind the boy's eyes, and his brow immediately furrowed with concern. Whatever was going on was serious, he could immediately figure that out. Harry played with his fingers, muttering under his breath, "I'm sorry if we're bothering you....I'm sure you have more important things to worry about then...." he stopped, taking a deep breath. This was incredibly hard for him, whatever it was.
"I'm here Harry," came a strong confident voice from his side, and Hermione grabbed Harry's hand with her own, squeezing it strongly. Harry nodded and looked up at the headmaster, who was examining the scene closely.
"Nonsense Harry," Dumbledore replied with a grandfatherly smile, "There's nothing more important to me then the well being of my stu...." he stopped in midstream when he saw Harry flinch at the word "well-being." What was wrong with Harry? Dumbledore immediately asked himself. This might have something to do with Sirius....or perhaps poor Remus' forced resignation. But Harry had handled worse things in stride, what was causing him this much agony.
"Harry, you have to tell him," Hermione firmly yet softly stated. "It's the only way to make it stop....to make them stop once and for all." Harry nodded to the ground, still clinging to Hermione's hand as if it were a lifeline. He took a shuddered breath, and began to speak.
The confession came out slower than it did the night before, and Harry didn't reveal as much as he had to Hermione, speaking in more generalized terms. All the while Hermione kept her gaze on the headmaster. His face was a literal mask. She was internally worried as Harry mechanically recounted his tale. Shouldn't he be showing outrage? Shouldn't he be showing at least some kind of outward emotion? Finally Harry finished his story, and it seemed that he also saw the lack of emotion on Dumbledore's face for the way he hung his head, partly in fear, and partly in embarrassment and shame. Hermione squeezed his hand again. If nothing else, it would do him cathartic good to speak about these things, so that she could help him realize that, no matter what, these things were not his fault.
"Harry," the headmaster croaked forward, with none of the usual twinkling in his eyes, "Why did you never tell me these things?" Harry seemed a bit taken aback by the question, but swallowed a gulp of air.
"I....I was afraid that....you wouldn't believe me sir," he finally confessed. Hitherto he had managed to keep control on his emotions, control which slipped an ounce as he confessed his fear. Dumbledore nodded, seemingly out of understanding, before he let out a deep sigh.
"Harry, I originally placed you in the care of your Aunt and Uncle for two reasons." Hermione internally scoffed at the idea that those horrible people could care for anyone properly. "Firstly, and most importantly, was for your protection from Voldemort's followers. The type of sacrifice that your dear mother Lily made for you left a lingering protection that I took advantage of. As long as you were able to call the residence of one of your mother's relatives as home, then there would be a type of protection against the surviving Death Eaters and, if he ever did return, against Lord Voldemort himself." He paused, carefully considering his next words, before his face seemed to change before them. In an instant he went from a kind-hearted, slightly off kilter yet formidable presence to that of a feeble old man, wracked with guilt. "The other reason was to try and offer you some semblance of a childhood, away from all the notoriety and fame that you have no doubt come in contact since your first year here." He pushed his glasses up his nose, taking a deep sigh before he continued.
"It seems that it is in this respect that I have failed you. I sacrificed a small measure of your happiness for a small measure of protection, and in doing so have given you neither." Taking a deep, measured breath, he turned his gaze completely toward Harry and looked almost, desperate. "I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive an old fool and his mistakes."
Harry was partly dumbstruck at this turn of events. He was almost certain that he had practically signed his death warrant a few moments ago, that Dumbledore wouldn't have believed him, would have told the Dursleys and that the summer would be a literal hell on Privet Drive. Now he was faced with a throughly chastised wizard who was practically begging him for forgiveness. Recognizing he had to say something, he internally shook himself out of a stupor and offered what he could of a smile.
"It wasn't your fault Professor," he quietly said, trying to keep his eyes firmly fixed on Dumbledore. "I'm sure you were just doing what you thought best." A small part of him did want to blame Dumbledore for the whole fiasco, but this part of him was completely drowned out by the fiber of his wondered being at the burden he had relieved himself of.
Everyone sat in silence for a few moments, unsure of what to say next. It was Hermione who cleared her throat and spoke first. "Harry forgives you headmaster, but the question is what can we do about it?" Dumbledore nodded, and spoke more firmly.
"It's clear to me now that sending Mr. Potter back to the Dursleys is simply out of the question, despite the wards of protection that it would provide." If Harry had tried to look more surprised, he would have failed. He stared at the headmaster with a shocked look on his face, borderlining on some kind of euphoric spasm that was withheld only by disbelief. Hermione simply breathed a sigh of relief. Though it was what she expected to happen, hearing Professor Dumbledore definitively stay that Harry would not return to those, it was hard to think of them as people at that moment, brought a relief to her weary mind.
"Of course, that raises the question of where you are to stay Harry. You cannot remain here at Hogwarts over the summer, the Governors would hear none of it, though I'm sure Hagrid would take you in if he was asked. Molly and Arthur would gladly take you in as well." At this, much to Hermione's surprise, Harry shook his head.
"I don't want to impose on anyone sir," he meekly said, seeming resigned to some pessimistic fate. "The summer is the only time that Mr. & Mrs. Weasley get to see their children, and I don't want to intrude on that." Dumbledore raised an eyebrow in concern. Clearly Harry was either deluding himself, or worse yet incapable of seeing that Molly cared for him as if he were her own. For a moment, Dumbledore was bewildered with what to say next, before his train of thought was interrupted by Hermione.
"You could stay with me Harry," she offered, with a small bit of hesitation lurking at the back of her voice. The two wizards in the room turned to her quickly, as she had a bit of a sheepish look on her face, "That is....if you...um....want to....that is." She suddenly found herself completely at a loss for words. She didn't really know where the idea had come from, outside of the standing invitation she had from her parents to invite a friend over for the summer. Dumbledore looked to have no real reaction to the offer, but it was Harry's reaction she was most concerned with. He offered a sad smile to her.
"I appreciate the offer Hermione but...." he stopped, contemplating what to say, "I don't want to impose on your parents either. You and Ron have families that you hardly ever get to spend time with except during the holidays. There's no way I can intrude on that."
"You wouldn't be intruding on anything Harry," Hermione firmly stated, causing him to glance back at her with something akin to wonder in his eyes. "My parents told me I could invite a friend over for the summer and besides, it'd only be for a month. Remember we were going to stay with the Weasleys after your birthday for the Quidditch World Cup." Realization dawned on Harry, having forgotten about the plans they had made for after his birthday. "And honestly," she said, biting her bottom lip, "With Mum and Dad working all the time, it'd be nice to have some company around the house for a change." Harry cocked his head slightly at seeing Hermione look the least bit vulnerable, but said nothing. He looked back to the headmaster, having made something of a decision in his mind relatively quickly at this show of emotion, and Dumbledore merely nodded.
"I believe I should defer to you in this instance Harry," he resignedly said, "After all I believe you to have better judgment concerning this matter at the moment."
"I'd love to stay with you Hermione," Harry said, turning back to his best friend, who breathed a tinier sigh of relief this time, "That is as long as your parents aren't put out by it."
"We'll go owl them right now," Hermione said with the same single-minded determination she had shown earlier. Harry nodded and turned back to the headmaster, smiling at him.
"Thank you sir for....for listening. For, believing me." Dumbledore smiled, his eyes twinkling once more.
"Words cannot express my regrets at having failed you Harry," he said with resolve, "But rest assured that I will do everything in my power to try and rectify that situation."
/ - / - / - /
A quick trip to the owlry and instructions to Hedwig to be as quick as possible in delivering the letter to Hermione's parents having been accomplished, Harry and Hermione found themselves walking by the Black Lake, simply enjoying the warm day. All thoughts of studying for the upcoming Charms exam was left out of their minds as they simply strolled along the shoreline. The Giant Squid raised a tentacle out of the water, splashing it down to the side as if to say hello to the young pair. Harry stopped near a lone tree on the rocky shoreline and bent over to pick up a small rock to toss skip across the water. Hermione sat down, shaking her head and letting the sun warm her body. Harry took the time to sit down next to her, a grin firmly plastered on his face. It was a far cry from the trembling boy that Hermione had held so close the night before. She turned to evaluate his countenance, smiling at how relieved he seemed. It was rare that he saw him this calm, this...at peace, and it nearly made her lose herself in the moment.
"Hermione," Harry suddenly said, breaking her out of her revelry. She moved her eyes up to his and saw nothing but friendship and, something akin to adoration if she could best describe it.
"Yes Harry," she said, the logical side of her mind fighting its way out of hiding, trying to get her to quell her emotions again.
"I know you said I didn't have to but....I want to thank you, for everything. If you hadn't...if I..." he fumbled with his words, and took a deep breath, staring back down at the ground. He seemed to be having a conversation with himself. "I want you to know that I really do appreciate all of this, you didn't have to go through all this trouble for me." Hermione smiled at him, but internally frowned. She saw the next problem that needed tackling, as far as she was concerned. The idea of "Help Harry" was still tantamount in her brain to practically anything else. His lack of self-esteem, more specifically his lack of self-worth, was beginning to worry her. Knowing now what she did, it was easy to figure out where it came from; being called a freak and worthless for reasons you couldn't possibly understand for the first ten years of your life would do that to a person. She simply placed her hand on his knee and smiled at him.
"Yes I did," she said with finality, enough to counter any argument that Harry might counter with. There were a few moments of silence, as Harry seemed to have something else on his mind. Before long he stood up, a gesture followed by Hermione.
"Let's get back to the castle," he said, "I know you'll probably want to study for tomorrow and I have to talk with McGonagall. I'll see you later, alright?" Hermione just nodded, wondering what in the world Harry needed to talk to McGonagall about. Harry just smiled as he saw Hermione's face slightly contorting in thought, "I'll tell you about it later. Say, tomorrow after class?" Hermione nodded and Harry gave a broad grin, before beginning the trek back up to the castle.
/ - / - / - /
The next day passed without incident, and it was in the evening that Hermione found herself studying her notes last minute for her last examination of the term. She glanced up from her parchment and sighed, as she saw Harry and Ron emersed in another game of Wizard's Chess. Though she knew that neither one of them was taking Arithmancy, it still would be nice to see them hit the books for the Divination final that they had coming up.
"Bishop to c3," Ron clearly intoned, and Harry scrunched his face a bit in frustration as Ron smirked at having placed Harry in checkmate...again. "That's game mate." Harry nodded and made to get up, grabbing a book as he did.
"Think I should study for Divination tomorrow," he rhetorically asked, smirking. Hermione just scoffed, muttering to herself an honestly, while Ron just shook his head.
"She's just as likely to say there's no point in giving a test, that she already knows how we're going to do and just give us that grade." Ron pointed out. Hermione glanced up from her notes, outrage apparent on her face.
"Honestly Ron, there's no way she'd do....that. The Headmaster would have her head." Harry nodded and set the book back down on the table. He moved over closer to the roaring fire in the common room, glancing into the flames for a few moments.
"I could just make up rubbish of some sort. You know, take a shot in the dark and see if I get something right. It's not like I'm ever going to take the course again." Ron stared at Harry as if he had missed something, while Hermione's eyes suddenly went wide.
"That's why you went to McGonagall," she said with sudden realization. Harry blushed a bit and scratched the back of his head while turning back towards them. He had forgotten to let Hermione in on his little surprise that afternoon.
"Whoa wait stop," Ron quickly said, catching up with the conversation, "You went to McGonagall?" Harry nodded.
"Yeah, I meant to tell you but, I guess it just slipped my mind. I asked her to let me drop divination and sign up for runes and arithmancy." Ron stared at him wide-eyed, while Hermione summoned up all of her inner control to quash a girlish squee.
"Oh Harry," she happily said, "That's so great! I'll finally have some company in those classes." Harry smiled at her.
"It wasn't just that reason," he quickly said, as if covering something, "I couldn't stand another year with that woman. Inner Eye my arse." He turned to Ron, who looked to be fighting with himself about something, looking closely at Harry and Hermione, before looking down. Harry couldn't exactly tell, but there was something off setting about his appearance.
"I guess I could sign up for runes," he finally said. He perked up for a moment and offered a smile, "After all, I'm not going to rot in that class with all her predictions of gloom and doom."
"I hope you know what you're getting into mate," Harry said as he sat back down on the couch. "McGonagall said that it was possible, but that I'd be far behind in the class and that she couldn't guarantee I'd be able to catch up." Ron seemed to turn flush at this little announcement.
"Bloody hell Harry, what have you gotten yourself into." Hermione cocked her head interestingly at Harry's response. She was beginning to suspect that his abilities were far more engrossing than his grades and study habits seemed to let on. No doubt more of the Dursley's influence was to blame. Harry just simply shrugged his shoulders and didn't offer a response. They were interrupted by a solemn hoot coming from the upstairs area. Apparently someone had left a window open. A white blur came flying through the common room, ignoring the cries from the portraits in the room, and landed straight in front of the trio.
"Hedwig," Harry exclaimed with a bit of joy. He reached forward and stroked the birds feathers, earning another hoot from his familiar. Hedwig held out her leg and Harry took the parchment from her. Surprisingly Hedwig seemed to glare at him reproachfully, but was quickly back up in the air and out the open window, no doubt to gather up what would normally be her breakfast for the night. Harry looked a bit puzzled at Hedwig's behavior, till he noticed that the letter was addressed to Hermione. Blushing a bit, he handed the letter to her. Hermione eagerly accepted it, guessing that it was from her parents.
"Why would Hedwig give a letter to Hermione," Ron asked. Harry was about to answer when a loud squeal of joy came from Hermione. The two of them both turned to Hermione with somewhat gobsmacked looks on their faces, having never heard such a....Lavender-esque sound from Hermione before. She immediately looked up and blushed at the reaction.
"Sorry." She paused before continuing with her elation, "Oh Harry it's wonderful! My parents agreed and said you could stay with me through your birthday! You don't have to go back to that horrid place again."
Harry blinked for a few moments before a smile started to inch its way across his face. Before long it was spreading from ear to ear and he was cackling like a madman, having never felt so happy in his entire life. In one fell swoop he scooped up Hermione in a hug and twirled her around the room, still drunk with happiness. After a few moments he set her down and, still grinning, began to blush. Catching his breath, he sheepishly offered an apology.
"It's alright Harry," Hermione said, stifling her own laughter. Truth be told, a good part of her hadn't minded at all. Perhaps it had just been the emotion of the moment but...maybe...just maybe.
They both turned and saw Ron standing there, still gobsmacked. There seemed to be a good mixture of emotions strewn across his face, and neither one of them could figure out exactly what the redhead was thinking. Finally, he managed some modicum of sense and asked, "Why are you staying with Hermione this summer?"
A/N: Ron Weasley fans beware the early parts of this fanfiction series. This is your considered warning.
Some might be concerned with the apparent 180 degree change in Harry's personality. Remember however that, even at this early age, he was prone to mood swings, and a lot has happened to him in the last few days as far as this story goes.