Harry Potter stood transfixed at his spot beside the window. He stared at the edge of the Forbidden Forest, not daring to believe what he saw. Blinking rapidly, he gasped as he saw the slightly hunched figure wrapped in a velvet purple robe.
Dumbledore is dead.
There was no explanation however for the ghostly figure on the edge of the forest. It was quite some distance away but Harry could not mistake the blue eyes that stared at him unequivocally from the shroud of the hood.
Horrified, Harry watched as the figure's arm stretched forwards until a gnarled, deformed hand poked out from underneath the stars and pointed directly at him. Harry wrenched himself from the window but could not help himself as he spared one more glance towards the figure.
It cocked its head in an odd sort of manner, slightly resembling a humming bird before the figure glided back, without turning around, into the forest.
"What kind of sick game are you playing at," he whispered.
Harry was aware that he was shaking uncontrollably as he held his hand up and watched it reverberate constantly. The warmth he had felt from entering the Common Room was extinguished by the ice that spread through his veins.
"That's impossible, no one can come back from the dead," he said to himself again, not realizing the irony.
Improbable but not impossible.
Harry shook his head before turning around and gazing at the forest. He remembered the ethereal events which occurred a little over three years ago in the very same forest. Could it happen another time, he wondered.
Abandoning all pretense of caution, Harry sprinted down the staircases and ran full steam across Hogwarts grounds to the Forbidden Forest crying out, "Dumbledore!"
Not bothering to remind himself that Dumbledore's white tomb remained untouched since Voldemort's disruption, Harry burst into the Forbidden Forest and rotated around the spot where he had seen Dumbledore. He gazed around frenetically, hoping to see a glimpse of purple or a flash of blue eyes.
You've lost it now; you're looking for dead people.
Harry smacked his head, hoping the voice in his head would shut up for just a moment. A flash of purple caught his eye again. There Dumbledore stood, still standing high in death. It stood, unmoving, in the middle of several bushes.
"Who are you?" Harry yelled.
The figure cocked his head in the same manner again, almost looking curiously at Harry. For a moment, Harry swore that the blue eyes flashed into red slits but as he blinked, the same curious blue eyes stared at Harry.
It did not answer Harry but instead glided backwards again in the same manner. It avoided trees and bushes as it glided further and further into the heart of the forest. Harry followed carefully, not carrying anything except the clothes on his back and the courage that marked him as Gryffindor.
Further and further, Harry followed the figure into the forest until he reached a vast clearing with a small lake. The figure stood still at the edge of the water, his blue eyes now unable to seen underneath his shroud. Harry could still make out the grisly hand slightly poking out from underneath the purple robe.
He stood there for quite some time, staring at the figure.
"Who are you?" he repeated.
The figure's head moved ever so slightly and spoke.
"I am you," the voice croaked in a hoarse voice, quite unlike Dumbledore's.
Harry blinked and the figure transformed into Dumbledore in his majestic blue robes. He smiled kindly and spoke, "Harry, my boy, how are you?"
"N-n-n-o," Harry stuttered, stumbling backwards.
The figure morphed into a laughing Ron, "Harry, you've got to see this, the Cannons won!"
Harry continued to stumble backwards until his back hit the trunk of a tree.
Now Hermione stood in front of him, "Oh Harry! I've missed you!"
"Hermione?" he whispered. The Hermione in front of him nodded and Harry reached out his hand but quickly retracted it as the figure transformed again.
Sirius now stood in him, standing proudly in jet black robes. He spoke, "Godson! I'm so proud of you."
"You're dead…" Harry said in a strangled voice.
So is Dumbledore.
"Is anyone ever really dead?" Lupin said with a laugh. He winked at Harry before the figure whirled and there stood Ginny.
"Harry, come to me," she said with a sympathetic smile. Harry could hardly believe his eyes; his wife stood in front of him with her arms outstretched, beckoning him to hug her.
Harry stepped forward and reached out his arm to touch her cheek. Just before he made contact, the figure changed into Tom Riddle. He stood there, unblemished and just as handsome as he had left Hogwarts nearly a quarter of a century ago.
Riddle winked and whispered tauntingly, "What's wrong Harry? Cat got your tongue?"
Harry blinked and there was nothing more. He whirled in the spot, looking for any sign of whatever that thing was. He stood there blinking rapidly as he slowly panned the lake, hoping to find some sort of explanation for the recent events.
"I've gone crazy," Harry said wide eyed.
Who says you weren't crazy in the first place?
"Who's there?" Harry whispered, not daring to believe what he had heard.
Always questions, never answers.
Harry crouched and spun on the spot, looking for the source of the voice. It was around here somewhere and he would track it down. Harry believed that the voice was definitely a Death Eaters trying to break him. In his mind, the people he saw were not ghosts.
"If you would come out, we could talk," he yelled into the Forest.
We're already talking.
Harry whirled around again, desperately training his ears for the taunting voice. Harry peered around the forest before stepping to the edge of the lake, still wary of the voice. As he stared into the water, he recognized that he had been to this place before.
Harry's head swam as a wave of nausea passed over him. It took him a moment before he recognized how he knew this place. For a moment, Harry forgot the taunting voice and delved into his own memories.
"Harry, we've been over this ten thousand times," Hermione said as they made a lap around the lake.
"Just because you defeated Voldemort does not mean they're going to give you any preference when you apply for the Auror Academy."
"Well, if you say so. I don't want to get into the Academy just because I took down some overly arrogant jerk," Harry joked. Harry smirked as the corners of Hermione's lips twitched upwards as she tried not to laugh.
"I'm being serious Harry," she stopped to address him face to face with her hands on her hips, "I've talked to several prominent Ministry remembers and they told me they are going to exclude that little tidbit where you defeated Voldemort."
"So am I, I want to get in because of my scholastic aptitude," he said with a serious face but with a twinkle in his eye. Hermione's jaw dropped open and she retaliated by shoving him in the chest. Harry's arms wind milled as he tried to stop himself from falling into the lake but failed miserably.
He spit out water and saw Hermione bent over laughing at his plight. The water was lukewarm as it was the end of their 7th year at Hogwarts. Spitting out more water, Harry pointed at her and said, "Oh, very mature."
She continued to laugh and said, "Get up here and I'll dry you off."
"Here, give me a hand," Harry said.
"Oh no, I'm not falling for that," she took a step back and repeated her previous statement.
Harry shrugged and winked at her as he waved his wand, "Wingardium Leviosar."
Hermione shrieked as she was lifted into the air and dropped into the water besides Harry.
"H-h-h-arry James Potter," she stuttered with water in her mouth, "you're dead." She shot a mild tickling jinx at him but he deflected it deftly and responded by sticking his tongue out at her.
"Oh, good one Harry, very mature."
"Have a little fun Hermione, we're done with school!" Harry laughed as he splashed her with water.
"Expelliaramus!"
Harry's wand soared to Hermione and she caught it with a smug look on her face.
"Who has all the wands now…Potter," she used his last name to mock him. Harry stared at her with his mouth hanging open before running towards her. Hermione shrieked playfully before bounding as quickly as she could out of the water.
Harry gave chase as Hermione dried herself off and ran around the lake. Finally, Harry caught up to her and heaved her over his shoulder.
"Let me go you brute," she pounded on his back.
"Give me back my wand," he set her down.
She frowned for a moment in mock seriousness before breaking out in an enormous grin and handed his wand to him.
Harry laughed and filled with affection for the girl that stood beside him all the time, he grabbed her by the hips and twirled her around in the air. There was happiness in Hermione's eyes as she half heartedly pleaded for him to let her go. He set her down after a few twirls and gave her a hug.
As they withdrew from each other however, their heads were at strange angles and for a brief moment, his lips brushed the corner of her lips.
They froze in mid-embrace, unwilling to stare at each other. Harry was still dripping wet from his fall into the lake as shuffled his feet, waiting for her to make the first move.
As usual, Hermione spoke up, "Um, you're still wet."
"Oh, heh, yeah I am," he chuckled nervously and dried himself off with a spell.
"We should probably go back," Hermione said with a forced smile.
"Oh, yeah, of course. Let's go," he said. He walked away from her with a deep blush and did not look back until they reached the gates of Hogwarts.
Harry was snapped back into the real world as he heard a voice behind him. Slowly he turned around until he was face to face with Ginny.
"Why didn't you ever tell me Harry?" she asked with a sad look on her face.
"I-i-i-t was an accident," he stuttered weakly. Ginny shook her head and started backing away from him.
"No! Wait!" Harry implored. He blinked and Ginny was gone again and all that was left was the crystal blue water of the lake.
Cheater.
"NO I'M NOT!" he bellowed at the voice, "NOTHING HAPPENED."
Oh really? Tell me you didn't like it.
"T-t-hat's not true," Harry whispered in horror, no longer looking around for the voice but staring horrified at his reflection in the lake. For some unknown reason, Harry had crawled over to the lake until he was peering down at it.
As he stared at his reflection, another face peered around Harry's shoulder. It was his own face peering over his shoulder. Harry turned around and stared in disbelief at the doppelganger.
"What's wrong Harry? Cat got your tongue?" the other Harry smirked.
Harry shuffled backwards on his feet, splashing the water, as he stared, slack-jawed, at the other Harry. He shut his eyes and tried to will away his copycat but when he opened his eyes, he was staring directly at his own emerald orbs, not inches away from his face.
"Wow, we're really alike!" other Harry said.
"This is impossible," Harry said.
"I told you already. It's improbable. Nothing's impossible with magic," other Harry said in a taunting voice.
Harry shook his head and he was oddly reminded of Hermione's warning in his 3rd year, what would you do if you saw yourself?
"A little scrawnier than I would like," other Harry grumbled as he examined himself.
"I certainly don't feel big," he remarked crudely.
"Who are you?" Harry repeated for the umpteenth time.
"Really, Potter, if you don't know who I am then you're a lot thicker than I thought," other Harry remarked.
"At least, I think so. Then again, if you were originally that thick, that would mean that I would be even thicker. I don't know, Potter, the metaphysics of this thing boggles even me so let's just start with this tiny fact. My name is Harry Potter. Just like you," he said with a low bow and an exaggerated sweeping of his arm.
"But-" Harry started, confusion overriding his main feeling of abject horror at this point.
"Look, let me make this easier. What happens when you split a large pumpkin?" other Harry asked.
Harry opened his mouth to speak, but he was cut off by other Harry.
"Rhetorical question. You get two of them. So quite obviously, I am your handsomer, faster, and obviously-" he gave Harry a look of disdain, "-smarter but nevertheless split personality."
Still disoriented, Harry was struck by a sudden idea and hurled a rock at the other Harry. He vanished in an instant and Harry gave a small sigh of relief.
"Very mature Harry," other Harry mocked from behind him.
The real Harry shuffled around in the water again, unable to escape the seemingly invincible doppelganger. Harry quickly wracked his brain for possible escape routes because, frankly, that was the only thing on his mind.
"Trying to run again are you?" other Harry asked as he blew on his fingernails and examined them against the sun.
"I've never ran from anything in my life," Harry growled, a bit of the old fire in him returning.
"Honest assessment," corporeal Harry spoke as he lifted himself off from a tree, "Although, if you've never ran from anything then that would imply you fought everything that has come your way, which, let me tell you, is highly dangerous."
Other Harry now paced around Real Harry, walking on the water, "Anyways, for the sake of argument, let's say I'm wrong about your instinct to run. Now, you've never had trouble hiding have you? That Invisibility Cloak of yours has gotten you out of more jams than your scrawny fingers can count."
"How are you walking on-" Harry said.
"-the water?" Other Harry finished. Harry looked curiously at him and Other Harry responded, "I'm in your mind."
"Potter, I'm a figment of your imagination or rather corporeal being summoned by your subconscious to deal with your inevitable insanity," Other Harry said frankly.
"I'm not going insane," Harry said stubbornly.
Other Harry opened his mouth and repeated in the same tone of voice what Real Harry had said earlier, "I'm going insane."
"So contrary to fact, you do think you're going insane."
Harry still stared disbelievingly at the figure standing on water beside him.
"Listen, Potter, you don't have to believe me if you don't want to. I'm just warning you before you resort to more drastic measures or Merlin forbid, summon more wretched creatures out of your troubled subconscious," Other Harry said solemnly.
"Trust me, I'm not bringing you out again," Harry said. He felt utterly ridiculous, talking to his supposed subconscious, but there had been stranger events in the life of Harry Potter.
"Why did I bring you out?" he asked Other Harry.
"Beats me," Other Harry shrugged, "You're the one with the real mind here."
"But-" Harry said, but the doppelganger was gone. Harry crawled back to shore and collapsed on the pebbles, more confused at this moment than at any point of his hectic life.
His heart throbbed with pain and his mind spun, trying to absorb what had happened. He could neither bring himself to accept the world around him nor his own supposed insanity and resolved to end this madness.
***
Harry stumbled through the forest, hearing voices from all directions. He struggled to close his mind as Snape had instructed him to do so but he could not escape the voices.
Maybe it's because we're in your mind.
Harry gave a yell of desperation as he smashed his head into a tree. Blood poured from the fresh gash but Harry did not care as he walked in a drunk like trance back to Hogwarts. Cuts were forming where he brushed against the thorns and branches but Harry only dragged himself forwards.
His mind was spinning from the voices whispering in the trees and he kept looking over at his shoulder at his invisible attacker.
"Have to - get rid - of them," he said in between gasps. Blood dripped in his wake from all the open wounds in his body as he smiled maniacally when he spotted the tall towers of Hogwarts.
He tripped over a rather large rock and felt pain radiate from his knee. Harry howled in pain but limped on, unimpeded by his injury.
As he entered Hogwarts, he saw brief flashes of random people walking through the halls. He spotted Luna skipping down the first staircase and giving him a wave. Fred and George hustled past him with a large bag labeled 'dangerous.' Dean, Seamus, and Neville walked by him, roaring at some hilarious joke.
He ascended the staircases, sometimes leaping from one to another despite the throbbing in his knee. At last he reached the top of the Astronomy Tower.
Blood fell from the new gash in his forehead, splattering on the ledge below him. The wind blew through his hair as he looked at the Forbidden Forest once again. He spotted the velvet purple robe with stars on the edge of the Forest once again. It was looking at him, the red eyes burning into his heart.
He swayed slightly as he glanced at the ground below him. The different emotions surged from Harry as a tear, mixed with blood, fell from the ledge and down on the ground. Sobbing and smiling at the same time, Harry inched forward until only the balls of his feet were on the ledge.
"I'm sorry Ginny," he said to no one in particular.
He leaned forward and closed his eyes. He felt his body pitching forward and let go of the adjacent wall that kept him balanced. The wind howled furiously around his body as he passed the point of no return.
No.
Harry's eyes snapped open, but he had already let go of the walls. His body lurched forwards but at the last second, he tilted himself sideways and jumped.
He caught hold of the flag on the flag banister and hung on for dear life.
Rip.
The flag ripped underneath his grip and Harry furiously clambered to grab the pole. Just as the last thread tore from the main flag, Harry reached the pole. He hung there and slowly rotated until he was facing the ledge again.
He swung forwards, trying to achieve a pendulum-like movement. Back and forth he swung until he released at the apex of his movement and latched on the ledge. He pulled himself up with great effort and fell onto the stone floor of the Astronomy Tower.
Harry Potter lay there in a mix of blood and tears, just minutes after his attempted suicide.
***
Leave a review for the poor fellar!
Harry's really gone off the edge now has.
I wonder how everyone else is doing?