Chapter 4
Harry stared at the tent entrance for a few moments, unable to process what had just happened. He was still trying to handle the information that Hermione Granger had erotic feelings for him when she had suddenly left the room. Slowly it dawned on him how his friend was probably feeling right now. She was most likely as confused about her feelings for him as he was about the feelings he had been developing for her. And she had no idea that he returned her feelings. Harry realized that sheprobably felt incredibly embarrassed, and she was possibly afraid that what he had just seen would ruin their friendship. He had to go and find her. Harry didn't know what he would say to her, but he knew that he had to do something to make her feel better.
He left the tent and looked around, but didn't see Hermione anywhere. He called her name several times, and he didn't get a response. Harry started to feel worried. Hermione shouldn't be walking around in the woods alone in times like these. He walked a few minutes, hoping that he had chosen the right direction. When he started contemplating turning around and searching elsewhere, he heard someone crying in the distance. He followed the sound and found Hermione sitting in a clearing, resting against a large tree.
"Hermione ..." he said in, what he hoped to be, a soothing tone. Hermione jerked at the sound of his voice and buried her head in her arms, not daring to look at him. Harry didn't feel encouraged by her reaction, but sat down next to her nevertheless.
"Hermione, please talk to me," Harry pleaded, but Hermione only cried harder. "At least look at me, please."
"I can't ..." she sobbed, still hiding her face from him.
Harry felt helpless, and he didn't know what to say, so he just said the first thing that came to his mind.
"I'm sorry." That seemed to get her attention; at least she lifted her head a little at his words. Encouraged, Harry continued. "I should have stopped sooner, before I ... I didn't mean to spy on you, really, I just... when I saw you... like that ... I felt like paralyzed. ... I'm sorry," he babbled.
"I'm sorry, too," Hermione finally managed to say. "I'm sorry for ... for what I did. But, I can't take it back, and you can't take back that you saw it and now everything is ruined between us."
"No!" Harry hurried to say. "That's not true; this doesn't ruin what we have."
Hermione snorted. "Yeah, whatever you say. How could my having sexual fantasies about my best friend ruin anything?"
Harry sighed. If he wanted to fix this he would have to be honest, even if it was embarrassing. He chose his words carefully.
"Hermione ... I didn't mean to perform Legilimency on you." Hermione looked as if she wanted to interrupt him, but Harry didn't give her a chance. "No, please let me finish." She nodded silently, and Harry continued. "When you saw my last memory, the one with the Quidditch final, I panicked. I didn't want you to see the rest of the memory, so I instinctively used Protego to stop you. Somehow that ended in me doing Legilimency on you."
Harry took a deep breath before finishing his explanation and Hermione used the moment of silence to speak.
"So this was all about you not wanting me to see you take a shower?" Hermione asked puzzled. The need to solve a puzzle had made her temporarily forget her distress. "I already saw your naked body, Harry, remember? I used Polyjuice potion to transform into you."
"Yeah, I remember, although seeing me undressing in public isn't a memory I'm keen on reliving."
Harry hoped that his poor attempt at humour would lighten the mood a little. Before Hermione could interrupt again or the courage to confess would leave him, Harry continued. "Hermione, the reason why I desperately wanted to stop you wasn't that I was having a shower. It was what I did in the shower. When ... when you hugged me that close after the game ..." Damn, that was a lot harder than he had thought it would be. "... Hermione, you don't have a clue what you do to me when you're so close to me... After you hugged me, I...I had to head towards the locker rooms to take a cold shower. Only that, with the memory of your body so close to mine and your face flushed with excitement, the cold shower didn't help much. In fact ... touching it when I tried to wash myself made it even worse... So, I needed to...relieve some tension and..." Harry gave up, realizing that Hermione had probably not understood a word of his babbling.
Hermione looked at Harry for a moment in utter astonishment. "Are you trying to tell me that you did the same thing I was doing in the memory?"
Harry gave her an embarrassed nod, not daring to look her in the eyes.
"And you were thinking of me when you did that?"
Another nod.
"Does this mean that you ... are attracted to me?" Hermione asked, sounding hopeful.
Harry was starting to feel like a Jeopardy candidate.
At least Hermione wasn't crying anymore. He could handle interrogating Hermione, but not crying Hermione.
Harry gathered the courage to look at Hermione.
"Hermione, I've been attracted to you for years. Ever since I saw you at the Yule Ball I've thought of how it would be if we were together, really together. I just never said anything, because I didn't want to lose you as a friend. I always thought you wanted Ron, and I cared too much for both of you to get in the way. I couldn't bear the thought of asking for more than friendship and losing you for good. I love you too much to take that risk."
Hermione stared at him open mouthed. "You love me?"
Harry could only nod. He was suddenly afraid that he had just done what he had always feared: ruin his relationship with Hermione by telling her how he felt. Maybe he had been wrong and what he saw in her memory meant nothing. Maybe it was just lust Hermione felt for him while she still loved Ron. His worries grew to outright panic when he saw new tears form in Hermione's eyes. Oh no! I've messed it up, I lost her!
"Hermione, please, don't cry," he said hastily, trying to cut his losses. "I only said that because I thought you felt something for me too. I guess I was wrong. It's okay, I'm going to be fine, as long as I don't lose your friendship. I won't mention this talk ever again. Just...don't walk out of my life, please."
To his utter surprise, Hermione grinned broadly.
"Oh, Harry, you're such a fool sometimes! Don't you dare try and take back what you just said! I've been waiting to hear this for ages! At the Yule Ball, it was your attention I wanted to get! But you didn't say anything about my dress or Viktor, or Cormac McLaggen. You just didn't seem to care. Ron did though. He was jealous and started to show interest in me, and I felt flattered by that. I cared a lot for Ron, and he seemed to be in love with me. I thought he was the best I would ever get. You were all into Cho, and then there was Ginny and I thought I'd never have a chance with you. That's why I decided to take what I could get and only dream about you," Hermione admitted.
Harry was quite positive that he was grinning like an idiot, but he didn't care.
"Hermione, you were so wrong! The only reason why I didn't say anything about Viktor or Cormac was that I thought you were using them to make Ron jealous! And, I couldn't show that I was jealous of Ron. I couldn't risk losing both my best friends. Cho was only a silly crush, nothing more. And Ginny ... Well, I think it was a little like you and Ron. I thought I couldn't have you, and I had just found out how shallow Cho really was. Ginny was nice and understanding, and she seemed to really care for me. I always liked her, and I thought that I might grow to love her someday. In the last few weeks, I haven't been so sure anymore though. The more time I spend with you the harder it was for me to put my feelings for you aside."
Hermione smiled and threw her arms around Harry's neck. He pulled her into a firm hug, and once again, he buried his head in her hair. She felt so good in his arms.
Harry gently kissed her hair and started murmuring endearments. "I love you, I love you so much ... my Hermione."
Hermione enjoyed the embrace a few moments before she pulled away enough to look into Harry's emerald eyes.
"I love you, too," she whispered. "I think I always have."
Harry held Hermione at arm length, drinking in her sight as if she was a dream figure that could vanish any second. Harry's dreamy expression made Hermione smile. Apparently, she came to the conclusion that she couldn't expect any actual action from him anytime soon. So, she leaned forward and gently kissed Harry. That's what it took for Harry to realize that this was real, and not just one of the many dreams he had had about Hermione confessing her love for him. Harry hesitantly started to suckle Hermione's lower lip. He had kissed girls before, but this was different, this was Hermione. Harry was pleasantly surprised when a soft moan escaped Hermione's lips. The sweet little sound and her hot breath on his lips, was intoxicating. Feeling bolder, Harry gently ran his tongue over Hermione's bottom lip, silently asking her to give him access to her mouth. Hermione gave into Harry's unspoken request and parted her lips, closing her eyes in anticipation. Harry gently deepened the kiss and started exploring her mouth. Hermione eagerly returned the kiss and soon their tongues were playfully caressing each other. Harry pulled Hermione closer and she went a step further by sitting down in his lap. He was quite surprised by her boldness, but didn't complain, it felt far too good to hold her that close. Encouraged, Harry allowed his hands to wander over Hermione's body. First, he let his hands run over her back, but soon he couldn't resist the temptation of caressing her lovely breasts through her sweater. The hot kiss, the sensation of her groin rubbing against his, and the feeling off her breasts under his hands sent Harry's hormones into overdrive and he could feel himself harden. Damn! Harry thought. He was sure Hermione could feel his arousal and he felt incredibly embarrassed. He broke the kiss and looked apologetically at her.
"I'm sorry." he mumbled.
Hermione laughed softly. "Don't be, I feel the same way. It's just less noticeable when you are a girl."
Harry grinned, relieved that his physical reaction to the kiss hadn't offended her. "Do you want to continue this in the tent then?" He asked hopefully.
Hermione nodded and stood up. Harry took her hand, and they walked back, never letting go of each other's hand.
When they had entered the tent, Harry was surprised, and a little shocked, that Hermione pulled him straight to the bedroom.
"Hermione...we don't have to...when I asked if we could continue I meant... you know...kissing and stuff..."
Hermione smiled at Harry's shyness, "Does this mean you don't want to do more than kiss?" she asked teasingly.
"Of course I do! I just don't want to push you," he explained.
Hermione's expression softened at his concern. She put her arms around Harry's neck and gently stroked his hair with one of her hands.
"You aren't pushing me, Harry. I want this as much as you do. I love you, Harry, and I've dreamed about making love with you for years."
Harry kissed Hermione tenderly. "I love you, too. I love you more than anything in the world."
Harry didn't object further when Hermione took his hand again and guided him to the bedroom where she sat down on one of the bunks, pulling Harry with her.
Hermione started to pull off her sweater, but Harry stopped her. She looked at him in confusion. "What's wrong?"
"Wait! This just isn't right. Not us," Harry hurried to say when he saw the hurt look in Hermione's eyes. "I mean this tent, this bunk, everything. You deserve better than that." Before Hermione could formulate a reply, Harry had taken his wand from his jeans. He touched the bunk with it and said "Engorgio", causing it to enlarge to the size of a small double bed. He touched the simple bedding with the tip of his wand and transformed it to red silk. Then, he raised his wand and let dozens of floating candles appear.
Hermione gasped at the beauty of the sight. "I'm impressed."
Harry grinned proudly. "For the first time, I'm glad that you persuaded me to read Hogwarts - A History. I remembered the spell that they used for the candles in the Great Hall."
Hermione decided for a nonverbal reply and kissed Harry softly, putting all her love for him in the kiss. When they had to stop for breath, Hermione used the opportunity to pull her sweater over her head. Harry couldn't help but stare at her bra covered breasts. He enjoyed the view for a moment, and then he followed her example by removing his sweater as well. Hermione pulled Harry back in her arms and he started caressing her exposed skin. She so felt warm and soft. Harry let his hands wander and finally started to caress her breasts through the thin material of her bra. Hermione moaned, and Harry felt her nipples harden under his touch. He was arousing her! The realisation was an immense turn-on for Harry. Hermione gave him an incredibly sexy smile he hadn't thought she was capable of, and she removed her bra at a torturously slow pace. Harry swallowed hard when he saw Hermione's bare breasts for the first time. She was perfect! He just stared at her breasts for a few moments, unable to make any coherent thoughts.
"I know they aren't very big…" Hermione whispered, suddenly feeling very self-conscious and shy. Harry looked at Hermione, needing a moment to process her words.
"They are perfect!" He eventually managed to say. "You are so beautiful." Hermione blushed, but smiled brightly. "May I touch you?" Harry asked shyly. He had touched her breasts through the material of her bra, but he felt like he should ask permission before he touched her bare breasts.
Hermione gave him an amused smile. "You may touch me wherever you want."
Harry started slowly caressing Hermione's breasts. When he brushed her nipples she moaned softly. She obviously liked to be touched there, so Harry started experimenting with different speeds and changing pressure until he had found a rhythm that made Hermione moan out load and close her eyes.
Hermione closed her eyes in bliss. She couldn't believe how turned on she already was. Harry hadn't even touched her below the waist yet. Deciding to return the favour, Hermione started to stroke Harry through his jeans. He gasped, and his eyes fluttered shut. "Hermione, I need to get out of these jeans." Hermione gave Harry an apologetic look. She hadn't thought about that before, but, of course, his pants were uncomfortably tight by now. Hermione let go of Harry long enough for both of them to remove their pants. As soon as they had gotten rid of the offending fabric, Hermione pulled Harry down next to her. Harry gathered her in his arms, and they started kissing and exploring each others bodies again. Hermione returned to stroking Harry. The passion he experienced made him feel bolder. He let his right hand wander between Hermione's legs and started stroking her through the thin material of her panties.
He was rewarded by a deep moan. Harry followed his instincts, and soon found a rhythm that caused Hermione's breathing to become shallow and her heart to beat faster. When she suddenly gripped his hand, Harry was afraid he had done something wrong until he realized that she was just removing her last piece of clothing. Harry gasped. Hermione was lying next to him completely naked and he had never seen anything more beautiful in his life. He stared at the girl next to him in awe, before leaning down to kiss her tenderly.
After a long and gentle kiss, Harry started to pleasure Hermione with his fingers again. He needed a few moments to find her clit, but when he hit it there was no doubt he had found the right spot. Hermione gasped and jerked her hips against his fingers, silently urging him to go on. Harry was amazed by Hermione's reactions to his touch. She was moaning and sighing uncontrollably and gave in completely to his touch.
Feeling bold, Harry gently entered Hermione with a finger. She gasped at the first contact, but her face told him it wasn't in pain. Harry explored her inner walls, trying to remember what he had read about that special spot and how to find it. Suddenly, Harry heard Hermione half gasp, half moan his name. He grinned proudly and started rubbing her G-spot with his index finger while massaging her clit with his thumb. Hermione closed her eyes and started panting. "Oh god, yes... Like that... right there... god, Harry, don't stop!"
Harry was amazed to hear Hermione, his always rational, always controlled Hermione, moaning and muttering incoherent thoughts. He increased the speed of his ministrations and suddenly he heard Hermione scream his name. He felt her muscles contract around his finger and could see her whole body shake. She was cumming! He was giving Hermione an orgasm! Harry felt proud and extremely turned on.
He watched Hermione in awe. She was lying completely motionless, her eyes still closed. Her face was flushed and her breathing ragged. I have done this to her, Harry realized, amazed.
When Hermione hadn't moved after a few minutes Harry began to feel a little worried.
"Hermione?" he asked softly, brushing a strand of messy curls out of her face. "Are you alright?"
Hermione opened her eyes and laughed at Harry's confused expression.
"Alright? Harry, I feel better than I've ever felt in my life. Where did you learn to do that?" She asked amazed.
Harry blushed. "I'm not sure if you really want to know," he murmured.
Hermione tried to suppress a disapproving expression, with limited success.
"You mean you already did that with another girl?" she asked, trying, and failing to make her tone sound light.
"No!" Harry quickly reassured her. "I've never gotten further than first base with any other girl."
"So, how did you learn to please a girl like that?" Hermione asked curiously.
Harry lowered his gaze when he explained. "My cousin Dudley has a lot of these magazines, you know … I think he has them only for the pictures, you know of …"
"... half-naked women?" Hermione helped.
Harry nodded, blushing further. "I was curious and when the Dursleys where eating out one evening, I snuck into Dudley's room to take a look. I didn't look at the pictures for long, just for a moment, really. After that, I looked through the articles. There were a lot of articles about what women liked in bed, and…well, I didn't know much about these things and there was no one I could ask, so I…just read those magazines whenever the Dursleys weren't at home." Harry paused, still not daring to look up. "Do you think I'm a pervert now?"
To Harry's surprise Hermione sat up and embraced him tenderly. He finally dared to look up and meet her gaze.
"No, I don't think you're a pervert, Harry. You were just curious, there's nothing wrong with that. I've read books about these things, too. And I'm glad you did. Very glad," she added with a smirk.
Harry was relieved to hear Hermione wasn't mad at him. He pulled her into his lap and kissed her longingly. Hermione could feel Harry's erection between her thighs while she was returning his kiss passionately. She pulled back and gave Harry a coy grin. "It's your turn."
Harry wasn't able to formulate a reply, when Hermione started to massage him through his boxers. It didn't take her long to find exactly the right amount of pressure to make him moan and pant. "Hermione...you have to stop this or I won't last...any longer." Hermione stopped her ministrations and gave Harry a gentle kiss.
"Wouldn't want to risk that," Hermione replied. She gently pushed Harry on his back, and he let her remove his boxers. Harry was finally lying next to her in all his naked glory, and Hermione gasped at the sight of his fully erect penis.
Harry blushed. He felt very self-conscious under Hermione's gaze. Sensing his discomfort, Hermione lay down beside Harry and kissed him gently, reassuring him. Harry returned the kiss eagerly, and let his hands wander over her body again. Lying there completely naked, with a naked Hermione in his arms, exploring her body, and being caressed by her in return felt amazing. It was nearly enough to make him orgasm right then and there.
"Harry, I need you inside of me," Hermione whispered breathlessly.
"Are you sure?" Harry asked, and Hermione nodded.
There was nothing Harry would rather do then fulfil her wish, but he still hesitated.
"Hermione, I don't know how to do this without hurting you," Harry confessed and looked at her worriedly.
Hermione smiled at his concern, "Don't worry about that," she simply said.
Harry thought he hadn't heard her right. "How could I not worry about that? I could never forgive myself, if I hurt you."
Hermione's heart melted. There she was, in the arms of the boy she'd loved for years, about to make love to him and all he could think about was her well-being. Hermione stroked Harry's hair lovingly.
"It's alright, really. I will be fine. I don't care if it hurts a little. All I want is to feel you inside me."
Harry kissed Hermione tenderly and positioned himself on top of her. He gently probed her entrance with the tip of his cock, while kissing Hermione again. Then, he started to rub himself up and down her walls teasingly.
God, that feels good. Harry could feel that Hermione was very wet for him, and he was glad for that because he couldn't contain himself much longer. With the last bit of willpower he possessed, Harry forced himself to enter Hermione very slowly. He went inside her only a few inches at first, tenderly placing kisses at her lips, her cheeks, her neck, and the sensitive area behind her ear. Harry slowly pushed inside her a little further, until he could feel a barrier. God, this feels amazing. The sensation nearly drove Harry crazy with need, but he forced himself to stop and kiss Hermione long and tenderly. When Hermione started to clench her inner muscles around him probingly, Harry couldn't restrain himself any longer. He pulled halfway out, just to push inside her all the way in the next second. He heard Hermione gasp in pain, and the sound brought Harry back to reality.
Harry looked up and saw that Hermione's eyes were firmly closed. "Hermione, I'm so sorry," Harry apologized, startled.
Hermione opened her eyes, and met Harry's concerned gaze. "It's okay. It only hurt for a second," she reassured him.
Harry studied her face, trying to see if she was telling the truth.
"I'm really fine," Hermione said. "It doesn't hurt anymore. It just feels a little strange, but I think that's normal."
Harry sighed relieved and kissed Hermione again. Now, that Hermione had reassured him that she wasn't in pain, Harry wasn't distracted from the amazing feeling of being inside her anymore. Feeling Hermione's warmth surrender to him was the most pleasant sensation he had ever experienced. She was so tight and wet and Harry desperately wanted to move. He needed to give Hermione time to adjust to his size though; he didn't want to be a prick and concentrate on his own pleasure without making sure Hermione was comfortable.
Hermione could feel Harry tense and saw sweat glistering on his forehead. She smiled up at him. "It's okay, Harry, you can move. I won't break."
Harry was happy to obey. He started to move in and out slowly and soon Hermione started to meet his thrusts.
"Oh god, Hermione! Feels so good," Harry moaned and Hermione grinned proudly. She quickly got used to the feeling of having Harry inside of her and it started to feel quite good. Seeing the ecstasy in Harry's face and hearing him moan her name was an added bonus. She loved that she could do this to him.
Hermione caressed Harry's bare back and started gently sucking on his throat, where she could feel his racing pulse. Harry gasped when he felt her lips and tongues working their magic on his sensitive flesh.
"Hermione...I think... I can't…hold on…much longer."
"It's alright, Harry," Hermione whispered in his ear. "Let go. Come for me Harry."
Harry stopped fighting against his release and moments later, his eyes fluttered shut and he screamed Hermione's name when he came harder than he had ever thought possible. Completely sated, Harry collapsed on top of Hermione.
Harry had no idea how long he had lain there, in Hermione's arms, still joined with her, when he eventually came down from his high and started to perceive his surroundings again. His head was nestled between Hermione's breasts and he could feel her gently stroking his hair. Harry slowly pulled out of Hermione, and she let out a disappointed sigh.
"Wow," was all Harry managed to say.
Hermione laughed. "That pretty much sums it up."
"Really?" Harry asked, suddenly looking guilty again. "I mean, I wasn't very good. You didn't...you know. I'm sorry."
Hermione kissed Harry gently. "Stop apologizing, Harry. Making love with you was wonderful. I've never felt as complete and as loved as I did when you made love to me, and I can't wait to do it again. Besides, you already gave me the most amazing orgasm today. It was your turn."
Harry smiled proudly and pulled Hermione into his arms. "The most amazing orgasm?"
Hermione laughed and playfully punched Harry. "Harry, you can be such a guy sometimes."
"If I didn't make that clear before my statement, I did something wrong," Harry replied smirking.
Hermione rolled her eyes and then met Harry's lips for a long kiss. When they pulled away, the playful smirk had left Harry's features and had been replaced by an expression of pure love and adoration.
"I love you, so much," Harry whispered, caressing her cheek.
"I love you, too. More than I can express with words."
Harry pulled Hermione closer, and she snuggled against him, resting her face on his chest, closing her eyes. Harry gently covered Hermione with the blanket, and kissed her forehead, before closing his eyes as well. It didn't take long until they both were fast asleep. For Harry, it was the first good night's rest in months.
For the first time since they had started their hunt for the Horcruxes, Harry wasn't tormented by nightmares, visions, or insomnia. He knew that the next months wouldn't be easy, and that he still had to face Voldemort. But tonight, his heart and his dreams were filled with nothing but Hermione.