*Disclaimer: Pffft. Yeah. I'm JK Rowling, and I'm backing H/Hr, even after all called all the H/Hr shippers "militant". Ha! Jeez, if I was Jo, I'd totally re-write the last 3 books, anyway! So no, not her, not making money of this… nothing, zilch, zero. Happy? Kthnx
*A/N: I apologise profusely for the fact that it's taken me so long to get this chapter up. It's really quite a big chapter, and I've been super busy… of course that doesn't excuse the fact that I've kept you guys waiting, but it is a reason none-the-less.
ANYWAY! Enjoy! Lol
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Chapter 5: Making A Change
"Morning sleepy head."
Harry woke up with a kiss and a smile from Hermione. He grinned as he turned over, facing her. They lay in Hermione's bed, the sun pouring through the slightly drawn curtains.
Her face was a fuzzy outline, for his eyes were not covered by his glasses. "Morning, beautiful." He said, his voice slightly raspy, as it always was in the morning.
Hermione blushed slightly, snuggling her head into his chest as he wrapped an arm around her. She turned her head, so she was staring up at the ceiling, her mouth slightly open, as if she wanted to speak. One fatal sentence was on the tip of her tongue and she didn't know whether she should say it, or not. Her head titled carefully, her eyes meeting his green ones.
"What, Hermione?" Harry urged her gently, whispering into her forehead as his lips brushed softly against it.
"Harry..." She paused, taking another look at him, then back up at the ceiling. "You do know, that this will change everything, right?" She finished quietly, waiting with baited breath for his reply.
Harry nodded slightly, looking down at her. "I know." He smiled, "But I think it will be a change for the better, Herm."
She looked up at him and grinned, she was glad he understood that the ground he was now walking on, was shakier than before. Just from that one sentence, she drew security and certainty. She leaned up and pressed a kiss to his chin, her top lip just grazing his lower one.
Harry smirked down at her and held her slightly closer to him, leaning into her hair and whispering softly and slyly. "Hey, let's do that again!" He said with a cheeky grin. "You know... that thing where we lose the clothes?" He finished, pulling the blanket up slightly to look underneath it. "Oh wait. We aren't wearing any, anyway. Okay, well, we can just skip that step, then!"
Hermione smirked and hit him lightly on the chest. Harry withdrew from her slightly, rubbing his skin and pretending that it hurt. "Ow! What was that for?" He tried to wipe a smirk off of his face and failed terribly.
"For being a pervert, Harry James Potter!" Hermione's expression then softened at the smirk on his face and the two of them burst into identical fits of laughter.
"Herm..." A smothered chuckle, "I - I... I was kid - kidding!" He said through laughing fits.
The chuckles fizzled out after a few moments and both of them seemed to have a satisfied smile that danced across their lips. Both sighed happily, in unison, looking up at the ceiling above the bed.
Hermione looked up at him, turning to face him properly, as she propped herself up slightly on her elbow. She waited until he followed suit, both smiling at each other.
Harry reached out and pushed a stray strand of hair back behind her ear, his thumb rubbing the skin just above her eyebrow. She bit down on her bottom lip slightly, her eyes meeting his in a piercing gaze that neither of them seemed to be able to break.
"You're beautiful." He whispered softly, smiling down at her. She blushed slightly, her mouth opening to retaliate.
"But, Harry -"
"Shh." Harry whispered, pressing a finger lightly to her lips, silencing her. "You are." His smile turned into a grin, as he leaned into her, pressing a kiss to her lips softly, sighing against them in content. She obliged the kiss, helping him to deepen it.
She wanted to disappear under the covers once again, shutting out the rest of the world. Shutting out every other sound but the ones he was making; the gasps, the sighs, the groans. Shutting out the light and the aspect of time, the clock ticking annoyingly, as seconds, minutes, hours went by.
And even though she was shutting out everything - the world as they knew it - she never felt more open and alive in her entire life.
-------
The next day, Hermione shut the door to her office, sighing in relief as she leaned back on it. She was having a tough day, already. Three full grown mountain trolls started a riot at the speech she was trying to give on behalf of the Elvish people. Things didn't turn out well and she was glad to return to the peace and quiet of her office.
"Silence at last." She whispered happily.
"Psst, Hermione!" Harry whispered, as he was sitting in her office chair, grinning cheekily.
Hermione turned her head, her eyes locating the speaker. "Harry, what're you doing here?" She said in slight surprise, as she clutched at her heart.
"I'm here to see you." He continued to grin.
"How did you get in here?" Hermione asked, placing her hands on her hips in suspicion. "Who let you in?" She added, looking back over her shoulder, through the blinds covering the glass door. She saw her friend Gianna wave at her and grin. Instantly, she knew the answer to her last question. She rolled her eyes in slight annoyance, even though she knew that secretly she loved Gianna for it.
"Does it matter?" He continued to grin his mischievous grin. "I wanted to see you!"
Hermione returned her gaze to him and walked over, sitting down at the edge of her desk. "Harry, this is where I work -!"
"Percisely why I came here!" He said simply.
"No, you didn't let me finish. This is where I work, so that's what I'm supposed to be doing!" She scanned his expression carefully. "So, I really should get back to it."
"Aw, Hermione. But, but! I thought we could spend the day together or something!" Harry smiled at her innocently, placing his fingers over the hand that was laying atop her knee. His thumb began to rub a straight line over her skin, causing Hermione to weaken slightly.
Pull yourself together, Granger! He's just trying to break you! But... he won't succeed! - Wow, his hand is soft. - No! Concentrate! Must. Work. Here, to work!
She looked away from his tempting fingers and saw a big, dumb grin stretch across his handsome face. Dammit, she was done for. She quickly got up and walked around her desk to the filing cabinet and pulled it open, pretending to busy herself with something else.
"Please, Hermione. Pleeease?" He continued to beg. He got up out of her chair and stood beside her, his eyes saddening and his lip pushing out, as he gave her the puppy dog face.
Hermione squeezed her eyes shut, sighed in slight annoyance and finally, gave in to the part of her that knew Harry was right. She closed the cabinet shut, turned to face him and took a deep breath. She knew what she was about to do was wrong, but she couldn't resist his pleading.
"Fine, fine."
Harry's grin broadened, but then suddenly he frowned, his brow furrowing. "How are we going to get out of here? This place looks heavily secured. They did a full body search! And I think an old witch tried to frisk me!" He said, shuddering in disgust.
Hermione stared at him for a moment, looking at him with a look that was a cross between 'Why did you tell me that?' and 'That is the most disgusting thing I've ever heard'.
"What?! She did!" He looked scandalised
"Well, maybe you should've thought about how we were going to get out, before you came here to kidnap me from work, Harry." Hermione said sternly, raising her eyebrow in his direction as she shook her head slightly, trying to remove all disgusting mental pictures.
"Come on, you must have a way out. You know this building better than I do!" When he got a glare from Hermione, he tried desperately to think of something. "Erm... we can... apparate!" He finished, a tone of encouragement in his voice.
"No. The whole building is magically protected. It's like Hogwarts, you can't apparate in and we can't apparate out..." Upon saying that, suddenly, an idea sparked in Hermione's head. "Unless..." She made her way to her office door, looking through the blinds.
"Come on, follow me." She whispered, turning around and beckoning Harry forward. "We have to be very inconspicuous. So, you go first-"
"This feels like a secret mission." Harry whispered excitedly, cutting her off.
"You're such a guy! This isn't a secret mission, we aren't undercover agents and we aren't trying to stop the building from blowing up. All we have to do, is get to the elevator at the end of the hall." She said, rolling her eyes at his childish air.
"Okay. I can do that." Harry said simply, nodding his head. "So, I'll just meet you there?"
"Yes, I'll come right behind you." She said reassuringly. She placed her hand on the doorknob and opened it carefully, pushing Harry out into the corridor. Within minutes, she followed, closing the door carefully and quietly behind her. She halted in front of the elevator, now standing beside Harry.
"What do we do, now?" He asked her, plunging his hands deep into his jean's pockets'.
"Now, we get on the elevator and if my memory serves me right, we can apparate out." She shrugged.
"But there's got to be a catch, there's always a catch." Harry said knowingly, as he pressed the button. The two of them waited until the elevator dinged loudly and the doors opened.
"Come on, it's worth a shot." Hermione said with a smile, grabbing his hand and pulling him in. They both watched the doors close from inside the elevator. Hermione pressed the button of the lowest floor possible: the basement. She waited and suddenly the two of them were being carried down by the elevator, the numbers over the doors lighting up each time they passed a floor.
Hermione waited until the number '6' stopped lighting, before she pressed the red stop button. The elevator screeched to a halt.
"What are you doing?"
"We have to be between two floors." She said matter-of-factly.
"I knew there was a catch." Harry mumbled under his breath.
"Oh, stop it." Hermione whispered, reaching for his hand. "Now, are we going to apparate or not?" She smirked slightly, urging him to grasp her hand. He did so and looked at her curiously.
"Why are we holding hands?" He raised his eyebrow at her slightly.
"Two heads are better than one." She said simply, closing her eyes and concentrating on where she wanted to go. "Just, picture the bathroom stall of the pizzeria across the street, okay?" Hermione added, opening her eyes slightly to make sure Harry had his closed. She finally closed her eyes and the two of them imagined it together.
A loud pop was made, the weird squishing sensation settled in the pit of her stomach. Within seconds, the sensation was gone and they were on solid ground. She opened her eyes and saw the two of them in one of the bathroom stalls in the girl's toilets' at the pizzeria. Hermione grinned. They did it! Harry had sprung her from work!
"Pssst." Hermione whispered to Harry, nudging him. He still had his eyes squeezed shut. "Harry, we did it." She whispered.
He opened his eyes and looked around. "I'm not familiar with this stall." He whispered simply.
"Well, I'd hope not, we're in the girls bathroom." Hermione whispered with a small giggle. Harry's face cringed as he realised he would have to make a run for it out of there, before anyone he knew saw him. He let go of Hermione's hands quickly and looked around the small cubicle.
"So this is what it's like to be in the girls bathroom?" Harry whispered, sniffing the air. "Hmm. Smells cleaner than our bathroom, anyway." He shrugged.
Hermione had to laugh at him. "That's because we're not barbarians and we don't smell bad!" She whispered with a smirk. She heard the door swing open and voices of women talking to one another. She laughed louder when she saw Harry's eyes grow wide in terror. His voice squeaked as he stared down at Hermione.
"YOU OWE ME SO MUCH SEX, FOR THIS!" He whispered frantically, placing his hand on the lock of the stall, dramatically.
"What are you doing? We can just wait until they go!" Hermione whispered back, standing in front of the door. "Are you insane?!" She added, with a look of warning on her face.
"Hermione. They see two pairs of feet, hear two voices, and girls always take an EXTREMELY long time in the bathroom. Especially when they're in... packs!" He continued in a whisper, his 'woe-is-me' look, firmly in place as he began to become even more frantic and started fumbling with the lock.
"This is a girl's bathroom, not 'Wild Kingdom' on the Discovery Channel. Calm down." Hermione rolled her eyes, holding back more laughter. Harry gave her a heated glare and she sighed, "Oh, fine. We'll just make a run for the bathroom door, okay?" She finally whispered. "But Harry. Let me go first." She added, looking over her shoulder, as she quickly unlocked the stall door. "One...Two..."
"Three!" They whispered the last number in unison.
Hermione threw back the door and bolted out of the stall, Harry quickly following behind her. Neither of them bothered to see the look on the women's faces'. The two of them reached the door, pulled it back and quickly exited the bathroom without a backwards glance.
Harry and Hermione both looked at each other, gasping for breath. Within seconds, identical smiles stretched across their faces, both about to burst with laughter. Hermione sniggered and Harry lost complete control, laughing heartily.
"You should've seen the look on your face!" Hermione said through giggles. She clutched at a stitch in her side, her eyes never leaving his. She then remembered what he had said and her eyebrow arched curiously. "And about what I owe you. Did you mean that?"
"Yup. Every word." Harry said simply, leading the way back through the restaurant and out of the front doors.
"How much are we talking about here?" Hermione continued to look at him, curiosity etched on her face. She fought back a smirk and waited for an answer as he wrapped an arm around her waist and the pair of them began to walk down the crowded street together.
"Seven nights of it." Harry grinned. He knew it would never quite quench his need for her, but it might tide him over for a little while.
"A WEEK?! Are you... are you kidding me?!" She said in shock, her jaw dropping slightly. "I'd be exhausted! Harry I can't hold out that long!"
"Too bad! All work and no play makes Harry a dull boy. And you don't want a dull Harry, do you?" He grinned down at her, leaning in and pressing a kiss to her cheek.
"That's not fair. I've been hoodwinked!" She said indignantly, though a chuckle as her cheek tingled slightly from his kiss. "I demand we re-negotiate!" She added. "Four nights!"
"Six!" Harry said back, a stubborn look on his face.
"Five!" Hermione retaliated, sticking her tongue out slightly.
"Sold! To the beautiful girl in the very fitting black skirt." He grinned, his hand coming dangerously close to her backside. He grinned as she hit him playfully on the shoulder and blushed slightly.
"Stop it." She mumbled. "Anyway, come on, let's go get something to eat!"
-------
Harry and Hermione returned at eight 'o clock that night, back at the flat. They were at least three hours late and neither of them cared. The pair stood outside the door, Hermione's back to it as she had the keys in her hand, fumbling with the lock behind her.
Harry stood right in front of her, grinning as he leaned in, his lips about an inch from hers.
"Harry, don't!" Hermione whispered with a giggle.
"Aw, why not?" He fixed a mock pouty look on his face.
"Because, Ron and Ginny don't know yet. What if they catch us? We need to tell them together, so they don't feel like we've kept this from them on purpose." She said matter-of-factly.
"But, don't I get to drop you off at your flat and give you a goodnight kiss?" He smirked down at her once again. She was beautiful, standing there with a small smile curving on her soft lips, her gentle curls falling gracefully onto her shoulders and her cheeks rosy from the cold they experienced outside.
"Harry, we share this flat." Hermione chuckled as she again ducked her head slightly to dodge another kiss. "Come on." She gestured towards the flat with her thumb, as they both heard the lock click open.
She pushed the door open and her and Harry entered the flat together. Both stopped dead, as they saw Ginny standing near the closet, waiting for them. She arched her eyebrow in suspicion, her arms folded across her chest as she tapped her foot sharply against the wood panelling. Everything about her seemed curious. She looked at them as if she could see right through their guilty smiles.
"Hey, Ginny." Hermione said cheerily, Harry leaving her side and retreating to the living room. But just as he was about to take the last few steps to the open living room door, Ginny stopped him, not moving an inch, or even looking at him. "Freeze." She said simply, pointing behind her in Harry's general direction. Without question, Harry froze.
"You two, kitchen table, now." She said, in almost a motherly tone. "Come on... after you." She gestured to the empty table and waited for them both to sit down before following suit.
Harry began to scratch the back of his neck nervously and Hermione gulped slightly in the back of her throat, as she folded her hands neatly in front of her, always a sign that she was putting her intelligent mind through its paces.
"Spill." Ginny said, in the same motherly tone. They knew what she meant and they knew they couldn't lie to her, so making up an excuse was out the window.
Neither spoke, as they exchanged looks across the table. Ginny sighed, "Do I have to do everything myself?" She rolled her eyes, looking at the two of them. Again, neither spoke, "Well. I guess I do!"
"Well -" Hermione piped up, but was cut off by Ginny's hand that raised up to silence her.
"I'm not mad, I'm not annoyed... just, save the excuses, okay? I've heard them all before and so, I don't need a repeat." She raised her eyebrow again in her friend's direction. "Now, spill. How long has this been going on?" She spoke firmly, looking at the both of them in turn, as she gestured the space between them as if it meant something and was significant to the conversation.
"Not a very long time. The both of us were too blind to see it, until now." Hermione spoke and now Harry was the one to raise his eyebrow in her direction. "What?" She looked at him carefully, shrugging slightly.
"I've had feelings for you for quite a long time now. Mine never left, they never shut off; they never changed. I never got over our break up after the final battle. I knew why you did it, but it still didn't make it any easier to get over." Harry spoke solemnly. He no longer looked at her, but instead fixed his gaze upon his twiddling thumbs that were placed on the table, as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.
"You... you never moved on?" Hermione said after a few minutes of silence. She felt horrible. How could she have done that to him? She never wanted to make the decision she had. She didn't want to end their relationship, she just felt she had to. She felt that if she stayed with him, the wounds on her heart wouldn't heal.
Harry shook his head slowly, still not looking up to meet her gaze. "I never stopped -- I never stopped caring about you, Hermione. Never." He mumbled, his voice just above a whisper.
"I'm sorry." Was all she could say. She couldn't take back what had happened, but if she could, she would have done it in a heart beat. She could see the pain in his eyes, the hurt etched on his face. It made her want to cry. She wanted to cry for him; take away his sorrow, but she knew she couldn't do that. Nothing could change what happened, not even her trusty time-turner.
"Don't be." Harry sighed. He finally looked up at her and placed one of his hands over hers. "You've given me a second chance. That's all that matters, now." He spoke softly, giving her a small smile. "And I can't thank you enough for that."
Hermione smiled sadly at him in return, reaching over and hugging him across the table. Ginny watched the two of them and grinned. "So where do you two go from here?" She asked enthusiastically, as the two of them sat down once again.
Harry and Hermione once again exchanged looks. "Well..." Hermione spoke, an unsure air about her at this point. She gave Harry a curious look, waiting with baited breath for him to speak.
"As far as I know, we're a couple now. I could be wrong..." He trailed off, looking at Hermione with a question burning in his eyes.
"Yes, we're a couple." She confirmed, nodding slightly in Harry's direction.
"That's great!" Ginny grinned at the two of them, placing her hands on both of their's and giving them a friendly squeeze. "I thought it was a shame when the two of you broke up. I'm sure a lot of people did." She added.
Harry looked around the flat. Something didn't seem right. It seemed just a bit too quiet. "Where's Ron?" He turned back to Ginny, curiosity evident in his voice. He had lines of worry etched on his face.
"Oh, he said he was going to have a few drinks. Do you think I would have confronted the two of you if he was here? I mean, he may be extremely gullible and clueless... but I'd never talk about something like this in front of him, he'd assume the worst." She rolled her eyes in slight annoyance, "He can let his emotions get the better of him sometimes..."
Harry and Hermione's eyes grew wide in shock. "How - how long has he been gone, Ginny?" Hermione spoke, the levels of worry increasing, tension so thick it could be cut with a knife.
Ginny gazed over at the clock, "About four hours, now."
Harry and Hermione jumped up from the table. Both of their coats still intact, they quickly rushed for the door. Hermione hand reached out for the doorknob, but she wasn't fast enough.
"No time!" Harry called, pulling out his wand and muttering a few well-chosen words to it. The spell hit the door in a jet of light. It leapt open of its own accord, the two of them fleeing the room without a backwards glance at Ginny.
She quickly got up from her seat and followed, closing the door behind her and locking it. She made her way out into the corridor and pushed open the door with the sign reading 'staircase'. Harry and Hermione were already two flights of stairs ahead of her and she had to yell down to them to find out what was going on.
Neither answered and thinking fast, she apparated to the very bottom of the stairs, placing her hands on her hips as she waited for them to meet her there.
"Ginny, how did you-?" Hermione spoke in surprise as the two of them reached the bottom.
"Apparated. What's going on?"
Harry nor Hermione spoke, but instead they exchanged serious looks, as they all began to walk again, Ginny having to jog slightly to keep up the pace with Harry and Hermione.
"This has something to do with Ron, doesn't it?" Her voice was anxious as she looked between the two of them. They sprinted toward the revolving doors in the lobby, pushing passed people in the process. Exiting the building the three of them were now out on the quiet street, quickly making their way towards the local pub. "What's going on with my brother?!" She raised her voice in alarm and continued to jog to keep up with them.
The pub was now in sight, the music booming from the windows and doors. Harry turned around and spoke to Ginny calmly before they made to enter the small pub.
"Let's just say there's a few things about your brother that you don't quite know yet."
-------
They entered the pub to thunderous yells, so loud they almost drown out the music. A crowd of people were huddled around some commotion, screaming and cheering as if egging someone on.
"Excuse me, coming through. 'SCUSE ME!" Harry called, pushing roughly through the crowd. Once he reached the centre, he saw something he never thought he'd see again. Ron and some other drunk were fighting furiously on the floor.
"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" Ron kept shouting, sinking his clenched fists into the guy he was brawling with, anywhere he could reach. "...TAKE IT BACK!" One knee in the stomach and he knocked the wind out of him. Ron stood up suddenly, clenching his fists once more, waiting for his opponent to stand up.
"RON! What the HELL do you think you're doing?!" Ginny yelled, as she too made her way through the crowd to stand beside Harry.
"Wha'?" Ron said stupidly, turning towards Harry and Ginny. He didn't look good. He was sporting a bloody lip, a red, puffy cheek and he had a few bruises popping up near his eye.
"ANSWER ME!" She screamed. Never had she seen anything as disgusting in her life and she had seen a lot in her time, so far.
"This idiot was making fun of me!" Ron said childishly. Ginny could hear the drunkenness in his voice, knowing all too well how to spot it.
"That's no reason to HIT the guy!" She scolded him angrily.
"What else was I supposed to do? Pinch him on the arm?!" He continued in his childish air, making his way toward her as the guy in question was hurled on the floor, a small pool of fresh blood beside his swollen lips.
"Stay away from me!" She said firmly, backing up slightly. "What gave you the right to hit this man?!" Ginny gestured towards him on the floor.
Ron looked at her, the beginnings of anger on his face. It seemed shallow, but was definitely anger none-the-less. "And what gives Draco the right to hit YOU?!" He replied loudly.
"Don't you DARE drag my life into this. This is YOUR fault!" A lone tear suddenly streaked down her rosy cheek, as she began to back away a little further. "Who was I kidding, you're not Ron. You're not my brother... my brother would never get so drunk that he would even consider doing this." She mumbled softly, looking down at her shoes as she shook her head slightly.
"I'm still your brother, Ginny." Ron said carefully, reaching out to touch her shoulder.
She withdrew from his hand roughly, more tears bursting the boundaries of her eyes, "Don't touch me..." She raised her head to look at him and even though her eyes were slightly red and puffy from the tears, she still fixed him with an angry, penetrating stare. "You criticise me and how my life is going. You make my fiancé out to look like a monster, when all the time, you're just as bad as he is." She whispered. Even though her voice was soft, it resounded through the pub and sent a chill up Ron's spine. Her words hung in the air, echoing in his head and sending stabs of regret throughout his body.
Without another word, she pushed back through the crowd. Opening the doors to the tiny pub, she emerged out onto the cold, dark street.
Hermione, who had also come into the center of the crowd with Ginny and Harry sometime after the fight had stopped, placed a hand on Harry's shoulder and whispered "I'll go talk to her." With that she too, left the pub.
"Ginny, wait!" Ron called, even though she was long gone. "Harry, I've got to talk to her!" He said, trying to push past him. Harry firmly gripped Ron's shoulders and pushed him back to where he stood.
"What are you doing, man!?" He said angrily, trying to push past yet again, but Harry stopped him. "Don't get in my way!" He continued in an annoyed manor.
"What are you going to do, hmm? Punch me, too?!" Harry answered back, a note of anger in his voice now, also. "You messed up, okay? You messed up BIG!" He said sternly. "She doesn't want to talk to you right now, Ron. To be honest, she shouldn't have to. I mean, Merlin... look at yourself! You're a drunk!" With that, Harry turned his back on him, retreating to the doors. He then threw them open with more force than necessary, exiting the pub.
He left Ron to stand there, in the middle of the room, feeling like the biggest fool in the world. He had nothing to comfort him but the thoughts of the massive hang over he was going to have the next day.
-------
Where do we go?
Nobody knows.
I've gotta say,
I'm on my way, down.
It was at least three in the morning, by now. The sky was black and the moon stood out brilliantly against it. The stars made their best effort to out-shine the glowing orb, but failed miserably; it was simply too bright.
He sighed, sitting alone on a vacant park bench. He wouldn't go home, he couldn't face them right now.
He couldn't face the glares, the lack of conversation and the silence through the whole flat. He couldn't face the sad expression that he knew would paint itself across Ginny's features, the look of utter disappointment Harry would give him, or the complete disrespectful gaze Hermione would conjure up from the depths of her good morals and kind nature.
God give me style,
And give me grace.
God put a smile upon my face.
Let the truth be known; he, Ronald Weasley, was a disgrace to wizard kind. Being the git he could be, that was saying something. He was beyond redemption right now, he knew that. He didn't know how he could possibly redeem himself at this point and yet he wanted to, desperately.
He wanted it more than anything at that moment.
Where do we go,
To draw the line?
I've gotta say,
I wasted all your time,
Honey, honey.
Ron let his eyes wander to his surroundings. A little to his left, he saw the gate that served as the exit and entrance to the park. Further off to the left, he saw a huge fountain that had been shut off for the night. No water was coming from the spout; it was quite odd to see it that way, really.
He decided to concentrate his gaze on the ground where a bottle of beer, that he assumed was empty, laid forgotten there. His eyes blazed with a deep, sickening regret. His breathing became slightly erratic as he now fixed all of his emotions on that one, simple bottle.
Alcohol really was a fickle friend, if you thought about it. One moment, you're knocking back a few beers, having a good time. The next, you're punching the shit out of some stranger on the floor, as you're covered in their blood. And for what? Recognition? Revenge? Your pride?
It was all pointless, really.
Where do I go,
To fall from grace?
God put a smile, up your face,
Yeah.
A strong loathing began to emerge from somewhere inside of him. He was done. With drink, with hangovers, with disappointing people and not to mention making a fool out of himself. He was finished with it all.
This feeling of hate that now resided in him wasn't directed at anyone but himself. He was the one who had gotten himself intoxicated. He was the one who had punched that guy for a petty reason. He was the one who had made his sister lose her faith in him. It was him. He had no one to blame but himself.
With all of his being and all of his strength, he calmly stood up, walked over to the bottle and without warning swung his foot back, kicking it angrily. He watched it spin down the path, hit off the side of a statue and smash into a million pieces.
And ah,
When you work it out,
I'm worse then you.
Yeah,
When you work it out,
I wanted to.
How could he have let this happen? How could he have been so stupid?
He felt extremely unclean.
The fact of the matter was, his sister was right. His sister was right all along. He was just as bad as Draco. Just because he didn't beat up on a girl, didn't make him any better. And that's when his conscience began to tear him up inside. That one realisation alone, finished him off.
And ah,
When you work out,
Where to draw the line.
Your guess,
Is as good as mine.
He was no better than the one person he hated most. He always prided himself on his choices in life. He always knew that he was on the right side, fighting for the right thing and setting a better example than his enemy. But now, he was no better.
And that is what truly made him want to destroy himself.
Where do we go?
Nobody knows.
Don't ever say,
You're on your way, down,
When...
It ate him up inside. He was angry; extremely angry. With himself, with the way things turned out, with the way his life was now and it was all because of drink. But to be honest, not only was he mad at the fact he had turned into an alcoholic, he was mad at the way his family had all split up.
They had to take some of the blame for his behaviour. If they would stop being so self-centered, he wouldn't have problems anymore!
Turning around swiftly, he forcefully kicked the rubbish bin beside the bench he had been sitting on. He stood there and watched it empty itself of its contents and roll away on the ground, carelessly. Breathing heavily, his mind continued to race.
God gave you style,
He gave you grace.
And put a smile upon your face,
Aw, yeah.
He was tired of pretending he was okay with it. He was tired of standing by and watching them continue their petty squabbles and he was tired of being in the middle of it all.
Sick. And. Tired.
Although, now he could say he was part of the feud. He would never forget the way Ginny looked at him, only hours before. He would never forget the crisp tone in her voice or the sharpness in her words that sent shivers up his spine.
And ah,
When you work it out,
I'm worse then you.
Yeah,
When you work it out,
I wanted to.
"You criticise me and how my life is going. You make my fiancé out to look like a monster, when all the time, you're just as bad as he is."
Her voice wouldn't stop echoing in his ears, her disappointed face wouldn't stop flashing before his mind's eye and that lone tear that streaked down her cheek would never be forgotten by him, ever. But he had to stop this, he had to fix it.
After all, someone had to change things.
And ah,
When you work out,
Where to draw the line.
Your guess,
Is as good as mine.
As if nothing had happened, he turned around and made his way towards the open gate, exiting the park silently. Thoughts still crashing in his head, he plunged his hands deep into his pockets as he walked down the road, street lights beaming down on him and the occasional car driving passed.
It was some time after three in the morning and he couldn't bring himself to go home. What kind of life was that to lead?
Kicking a can gently out of the way, he crossed the road, headed to no place in particular. With his problems swirling around in his mind, he tried to think of somewhere he could go for the night (or what was left of it), but nothing seemed to come to him.
Its as good as mine,
Its as good as mine.
Its as good as mine,
(Nah nah, nah, nah nah. Nah mah nah, nah nah.)
He continued to walk for the longest time. Never stopping, never looking around to take in his surroundings. He just walked. It's all he knew how to do at that point in time; all his mind would let him do. He walked for so long, the sun was began to come up and he was now somewhere out in the suburbs; he had walked the whole night.
He finally stopped to look around. He saw nothing but grass, trees and expensive looking houses; a completely different place to the center of London.
All of these houses had fancy-looking cars parked beside their neatly kept front gardens. Everything looked picture perfect and Ron so easily didn't belong, with his worn-out, black, thin coat, his bloody, white t-shirt and his ripped blue jeans.
He stuck out like a sore thumb as he walked down the vacant streets.
As good as mine,
As good as mine.
As good as mine,
As good as mine.
Looking over to his left, he spotted a playground. A twisting tunnel slide, a set of monkey bars and a few swings. It looked like the typical suburban playground. Thinking quickly, he crossed the street and made his way toward it. Maybe he could take refuge there; It looked peaceful enough.
Entering through the gate to the enclosed playground, Ron walked over to the blue twisting tunnel slide and sat down at the mouth of it. He didn't know how tired he was, until he actually sat down. Yawning deeply, a searing pain shot through his head; the first signs of a hangover.
Where do we go,
Nobody knows.
Don't ever say,
Your on your way, down...
Clutching his head in agony, he leaned back against the slide, stretching the upper half of his body out. It was very uncomfortable, but it was better than lying on the ground. Sighing heavily, he wondered how he even managed to get himself into this mess. Painful flashes of the night before clashed in his head and it was all too clear why he was now lying on a slide in a suburban playground.
He felt lower than he had ever felt in his life. He knew that never should he be reduced to sleeping outside, simply because he was too ashamed to go home. But, there he was.
Closing his eyes carefully, he tried to salvage as much sleep as he could. He knew that it wouldn't be long before the clean-cut kids came to use the playground and the suburban housewives would stare down their noses, at the scruffy-looking drunk lying in the kiddie slide.
When,
God gave you style,
And gave you grace.
God put a smile upon your face.
('God Put A Smile Upon Your Face' - Coldplay, from 'A Rush Of Blood To The Head')
-------
"Harry, have you spoken with Ginny?" Hermione called from the bathroom as she stood in front of the mirror, brushing her hair.
"Nah, she said she would talk to me later. She went shopping." Harry answered back as he sat in the living room, flicking through the channels on the TV.
"I really worry about that girl." She lowered her voice to a normal tone as she showed up in the doorway of the living room. She leaned against the doorframe and placed her hand on her hip, seeing his intrigued expression, as he gazed at the TV. "What are you watching?"
"Some programme, very interesting. No idea what it's ca-" He stopped in mid-sentence as he looked over at Hermione standing there. Even in the simplest clothes, she looked gorgeous.
Her hair had just been put up in a neat pony tail and she was wearing jeans and one of his old grey jumpers, that was too big for her. She always liked to wear it around the house, or when doing the shopping across the street. When Harry would ask her why she hadn't thrown it out, she would always give him the same answer; it kept her warmer than most of her other jumpers.
He grinned as he saw the curious look she gave him, which was a result of him staring at her too long. "Suddenly, I've lost all interest in this TV programme." He said dazedly. Hermione smirked at him.
"What?!" She stood straighter, placing both her hands on her hips in a questioning sort of air.
"You look beautiful." He replied simply, standing up and walking toward her, halting in front of her in the doorway. He reached up and pushed a stray, curly strand of hair out of her face and behind her ear. He grinned slightly and pressed a soft kiss to her left temple.
"Harry." Hermione mumbled, giggling slightly. "Harry, I'm just wearing jeans and a jumper. You're old jumper from Hogwarts, at that!" Her hands wrapped around his neck as his lips left her temple, trailed down her jawbone and halted at her lips, laying short kisses over them.
"This jumper always seemed to look better on you." He continued to grin, mumbling against her lips. He looked down at the faded red and yellow lion on the sleeve and chuckled. "Gryffindor lions, right?" He added, pointing toward it.
Hermione's attention was turned to the lion on the sleeve and she grinned, "Remember when you let me wear this to the last Quidditch match of the season, in seventh year?" She grinned, her eyes meeting his once more. "You told me it brought you more luck on me, than it did in your bedside drawer."
"I remember. You spilled pumpkin juice on it the night before, when I had asked you to wear it and had to perform a tricky little cleaning spell on it." He chuckled once again. Just as he was about to lean in and kiss her once more, the door burst open.
Harry and Hermione leapt apart to see Ron come storming into the flat. He looked a right mess. He had heavy bags under his eyes and he seemed to have mud prints of tiny shoes splattered all over his white t-shirt. Neither knew what to say, as he stood in the middle of the hall, completely run down.
"I won't even ask what you two were doing, because I don't want to know." He said calmly. "And I apologise for last night. I made a total ass out of myself." He continued, turning around and closing the door behind him.
"Where were you mate? We were worried." Harry spoke, feeling slightly guilty. He knew Ron deserved to be yelled at last night, but he didn't want to have been the one to do it.
"A suburban playground." Ron said simply, seeing both Harry and Hermione give him strange looks. "Don't ask." He added.
"Well, that would explain the tiny mud prints." Hermione pointed out the mess that was his shirt.
"Yes. The little brats attacked me in the kiddie slide." He said, sending a shiver up his own spine as he shuddered in fear. Never again, was he taking a visit to a playground. Those kids were adorable, but when you're in their way of playing on the slide, they could turn around and try to destroy you with a vengeance.
"Little devils." He mumbled, almost in a paranoid sort of way. "Anyway, where's Ginny?" Ron sighed, knowing he was the last person she wanted to see at that moment. Against his better judgement, he continuously told himself he had to talk to her. He had to let her know he was going to change.
Hermione looked hard at Ron for a moment before speaking, as if choosing her words very carefully. "She's gone shopping. I don't know when she'll be back."
"Well, that gives me a while to not only work up the nerve, but the words to say to her when she gets back." He said, walking over to the couch and sitting down. He sighed happily; it was good to be home. For some reason though, he felt like he was sitting on something.
Getting up, he turned around and looked down at the place on the white couch he just sat on. Indeed he was sitting on something! His eyes spotted a thick, white envelope. He realised immediately why he hadn't seen it before sitting down; it was a white envelope against a white couch.
He slowly began to turn it over in his fingers, looking for anything written across it. When he saw nothing, he swiftly opened it with his index finger and slipped the letter out of the envelope. It was in Ginny's hand and it read:
Dear Harry, Ron and Hermione,
I never was very good with goodbyes, so I have written you this letter to let you know, that I thank you very much for letting me stay at your flat for all this time. I thank you for putting up with all of my bad habits and being good friends, even though I had walked out of your lives for so long.
With having that said, I feel it's time for me to go. I feel I have stayed in your flat long enough and don't want to completely wear out my welcome. No, this has nothing to do with the 'episode' with Ron last night, either. It's a choice I made on my own.
I've realised that people have flaws and problems they don't know how to deal with. Either way, I'm over it, it's fine. I just feel I shouldn't be there, because I almost feel like a burden on you all.
Enclosed with this letter is a few pounds to go towards the rent I would have had to pay at the end of the month. It's not much, but it's all I have at the moment.
Ron stopped reading momentarily, opening the envelope further and seeing a small wad of pound notes in the bottom of it. Turning his attention back to the letter, he continued to read:
So if you'll except it, then I guess I should say goodbye. It's not goodbye forever, it's just goodbye for awhile.
Again, thank you all so much. You truly are the best friends a Witch could have.
Love,
-Ginny
Ron let his index finger trace over her loopy signature softly as he mumbled sadly to himself, sighing.
"She's running away from me..."
-------
Now, don't just walk away.
Pretending everything's okay,
And you, don't care about me.
Ginny's key clicked in the lock of the flat she shared with Draco. She sighed heavily, closing the door carefully as she kicked off her shoes and dropped her bag near where she stood. She looked around, the place was - if possible - more messy than when she left it.
I never thought I'd be back here...
"Draco, I'm home!" She called through the seemingly empty flat, as she wandered towards their bedroom. Swinging back the door, she saw something she thought she'd never see.
And I, know it's just no use.
When all your lies become your truths,
And I don't care.
(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Instantly, hot tears stung her cheeks upon opening the door. Another girl was there. Another girl, in her home. Well, it wasn't much of a home, but it was all she had at the moment. She was now kicking herself, for she had just walked out on two of her good friends and her brother.
So. Stupid. D'oh!
Gathering her scattered thoughts together, she screamed "What the hell is going on, Draco?!" She then slammed the bedroom door behind her, she watching as the filthy slag scrambled to wrap a sheet around her.
Could you look me in the eye,
And tell me that you're happy now?
(Oo, oo, oo, oo)
"Um, Ginny! It's -- it's not what you think!" He said frantically, the quilt - her mother's quilt - covering him.
"Like hell it isn't!" She shouted angrily, more tears flowing down her cheeks in waves. "Draco, I trusted you!" She continued to yell. Although to be honest, the more she thought about it, the more it seemed like a lie.
Ever since he changed and began blaming her for everything possible, any trust she had for him went out the window. Then, when his drinking habits and his tendency to not take pride in his appearance started, any respect she had for him was also flung out the window, to join her trust.
Would you tell it to my face,
Or have I been erased?
Are you happy now?
Are you happy now?
The more she thought about it, the more she realised, she had been hanging onto the memory of what Draco could be and completely ignoring the reality of what he truly was. A liar. A filthy, sleazy, moronic, liar.
Spending time away from this place really has done me good in more ways than one...
"Where the hell have you been for the past two weeks, anyway?!" Draco retorted, getting up and letting the quilt slip off of him. He was in boxers and Ginny was glad, for she never wanted to see him naked again.
She winced slightly, her anger subsiding, as true hurt began to reach the surface. She wasn't hurt that Draco cheated on her, for it only showed her his true colours. She was upset because it poignantly pointed out to her how much of a fool she had become. She was hurt by the fact that she had wasted two years of her life with someone like him.
You, took all there was to take.
And left me with an empty plate,
And you don't care about it.
(Yeah)
The problem with her was, she thought she could change him when in reality, she couldn't. She couldn't change the fact that he probably never even cared about her. She couldn't change the fact that this probably wasn't the first time he had cheated on her, it was merely only the first time he was caught. But most of all, she couldn't change the fact that he had broken her.
He broke her spirit and her faith in herself. She used to be strong, she used to be independent and he turned her into the exact opposite of that. She was housebroken and she hated it. She looked past him and the sleazy whore, looking at herself in the mirror. She stared at her reflection for a moment, before answering his question. She may not have been strong before, but she was going to take this first step and be strong now. She was going to change, she was going to find that strong person inside of herself.
And I, am givin' up this game.
And leavin' you with all the blame,
'Cause I don't care.
(Yeah, yeah, yeah)
"Does it really matter where I went? You never even came to look for me." She said bitterly, walking out of the room in search of some suitcases. She was leaving him, once and for all.
"Where are you going?!" Draco demanded angrily, as she returned, with the suitcases in hand.
"Somewhere far away from YOU!" She screamed back, as she began chucking clothes into her suitcases, seeing the slut button up her blouse out of the corner of her eye.
Could you look me in the eye,
And tell me that you're happy now?
(Oo, oo, oo, oo)
Hmm. Skanks seem to dress fancier these days.
"You don't have to do this. You don't have to leave." He said pleadingly, taking a few more steps toward her. "Is it someone else? Is it Neville?"
She saw his feet cautiously tip-toe on the carpet, as if thinking that if she couldn't hear him move closer, she wouldn't see him move closer. Too bad things don't work that way. (Well, too bad for him anyway.) She drew her wand and pointed it at him quickly.
Would you tell it to my face,
Or have I been erased?
Are you happy now?
(Oo, oo, oo, oo)
"Take one more step towards me and I'll hex you into next week! You know I can do it, too. Remember who my best friend was in school?" She mumbled, her dangerous tone matching the glint in her eye. She used one hand to continue shovelling things in her bag, while the other kept a firm grip on her wand.
"Hermione Granger." Draco mumbled bitterly, spitting the name out like it was a curse, as his eyes clouded over with a suppressed hate.
Are you happy now?
Are you happy now?
(Ye-yeah, yeah)
"Oh and yes, I do have to leave, Draco. You see, because I'm usually not the type to forgive scum like you. I've come to realise, that I'll never be able to change you and forgiving you would just give you license to walk all over me again. Bloody hell, look what I've become! You're personal door matt!" She continued to rant, chucking her jewellery box, her watch that her Dad gave her and her picture of her family into a suitcase.
"But I -"
"Well I've had it!" She cut him off, walking across the room and beginning to pick up some of her shoes. "And this has nothing to do with Neville! He's my friend! He's never betrayed me, unlike some people I know." She watched the girl jump in fright and hop over the bed to the opposite side of the room.
Ha. She had almost forgotten about her.
Do you really have,
Everything you want?
You could only give,
Somethin' you ain't got.
You can't run away from yourself.
Turning around swiftly, she kept her wand on Draco and made eye contact with the tramp. "GO! No one's keeping you here!" She snapped and watched as the girl scrambled for the doorknob, wrenched it open and ran out of the room, not even closing the door behind her.
Ginny began to look around the room to make sure she had nothing left that belonged to her in it. When she was satisfied, she kept her wand pointed at Draco and walked toward the open door. Turning her back to it, she kept an eye on him, backing out of the room, her wand still raised and her suitcases in tow.
Could you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you're happy now?
(Yeah, yeah)
Draco slowly followed, his hands held out in front of him, as if trying to ease her into putting the wand down. "Can we just talk about this, Ginny?" He asked calmly, as she made her way into the living room, dropping her suitcases and beginning to pick up random things that belonged to her.
"No! Because you know what, I don't trust you anymore. I don't know how I ever could! You've hit me, Draco. You actually sank so low as to hit me! How do you think that makes me feel?" Her voice lowered as she spoke to him, but the anger and hurt never left.
She continued to pick up her belongings, now in silence, without so much as an interruption from Draco.
Once she was sure nothing was left that belonged to her, she began zipping the bags up.
C'mon tell it to my face,
Or have I been replaced?
Are you happy now?
(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, whoa)
(Yeah, yeah. Oh, whoa)
"Ginny, please don't go." Draco begged fruitlessly. He seemed to be taking this better than she thought he would. But then, she realised, she still had her wand pointed at him.
"There's nothing keeping me here." She said coldly, a tear sliding down her cheek. She knew what she was doing was right and yet half of her still didn't want to leave. Her anger had simmered, her hurt was ebbing away and the look on Draco's face was one she couldn't ignore.
Temptation was staring her right in the face, as she picked up her suitcases, backing toward the front door. "Draco. Forget you know me. Forget I even exist. You don't deserve me." She added, turning around and reaching for the doorknob. Opening the door, she placed her suitcases outside the flat and put her wand in her pocket. She felt she didn't need it anymore.
Would you look me in the eye?
Could you look me in the eye?
I've had all that I can take,
And now I'm 'bout to break.
"Ginny -"
"No... don't even try to apologise. I should have listened to Neville. Because after all these years, he's still right you know, he is worth ten of you... and so am I."
And with that, she closed the door behind her, picked up her suitcases and made her way down the corridor without a backwards glance, the clicking of her heels bouncing off of the walls was the only sound made.
She left Draco to stand there in the middle of his empty flat, living his now empty life, with an empty feeling inside.
'Cause I'm happy now.
(Oo, oo, oo, oo)
But in the end, she didn't feel guilty. She figured, he'd made his choice when he cheated on her and now, she had made hers. She was leaving him and moving on with her life, or at least, what was left of it.
And she knew there would be rough times ahead, but she was willing to face them. She was standing up and making a change.
A change for the better.
Are you happy now?
('Are You Happy Now' - Michelle Branch from 'Hotel Paper)
-------
*A/N: Okay, so I do realise that this is a huge chapter! Lol So much happens in it, it's insane!
Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed it, and I do apologise that it's taken me so long to post! I just have such a busy schedule!
Read and reply!
-Kourtz =]