Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own any of this whatsoever.
Spoilers: Books 1-4.
Pairing (if any): H/Hr, R/LV, and D/G
Author's Notes: This is the sequel to my fic "If You Love Me; You'll Understand Me".
Summary: This is the first chapter. It takes place a few years after the events of "If You Love Me; You'll Understand Me". Harry has changed his name to Harry Black and has many memories to reflect on. Sirius never died.
Living In A World I'd Rather Forget
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"Black! I'm giving you a direct order, get out of the…" the communicator cut. Orders be damned, Harry would sacrifice his own life before anyone was put in unnecessary danger.
He'd already sent his squad back to the rendezvous point; he was going ahead…alone. Zabini had handed over his communicator ordering Harry to call him if he needed help. It was dangerous and it was damn stupid.
The Phoenix squad was dependent on Harry, their loyalty lay with him and their path lay parallel with his. Whatever the mission, whatever the danger they'd stick by him, but on this particular mission, Harry felt the need to do it alone.
It was too dangerous to involve his crew. Zabini had a son on the way; Harrel was a bride-to-be, Stewarts had a promotion coming and Harry had nothing. He couldn't ask them to risk everything for this…a one-wizard hostage situation.
Deathly silent, Harry crept up behind the broken down underground train. The underground was the crime scene, one mad wizard was the culprit with two or three hostages. They couldn't be sure, but the Phoenix base had reported that one of the hostages was the culprit's own daughter, kidnapped a few days ago.
He climbed up the back of the train and lay on top looking out onto the lit platform. Looking from the stairs leading up to West London, Harry managed to get a decent view of the two main escape routes. One was the exit leading up to the subway entrance, unfortunately surrounded by Muggle police. The second was the fire exit that went deep into the underground, eventually coming up somewhere in the West End.
But there was the wizard entrance. The large poster of the new Stephen King novel was the portal back to BrookHolme, a wizarding town in the middle of London, like the Diagon district. The culprit would have to have a good know how of the underground to know about it.
Thankfully, the wizard hadn't used magic although he was clearly armed with 'a dark looking stick, probably using it as a weapon' as the Muggle police radio (tapped by the Phoenix base) had reported.
Harry moved forward a bit, crawling with his arms and hoisted himself to the front of the train, still covered in the invisibility charm. From his new position, he had a clear view of the whole platform.
The culprit was standing by a pair of hostages who were bound, gagged and tied together in the middle of the platform, quite close to the edge of the tracks. If his true intention was to push them off when another train came, the Muggles dashed the idea by shutting down the underground network across the West End.
He was dressed in bright red robes, not very disguising, and other Muggle clothing like jeans and a sweatshirt. His hair was cut short and he was indeed a young man, looked fresh out of Merlin's Academy. Gripped firmly in his hand was a wand that was emitting a low light, the only light present on the platform and was currently pointed at the two hostages…one a young woman, the other a small girl about four or five years old.
Carefully, Harry lowered himself down by the side of the train, pressing himself firmly against the wall and slid over to the other side of the tracks, staying as low as possible. He never knew when the charm would wear out.
Taking out his own wand and removing the charm quickly, Harry jumped up onto the platform and pointed his wand at the culprit menacingly.
"Drop the weapon," Harry demanded walking closer to the culprit.
The culprit looked up and seemed startled at first and it was apparent that he had been crying, bloodshot eyes and red cheeks. Slowly, the culprit stood up and his wand dropped out of his hand as if he wasn't gripping it at all.
"Turn around," Harry said taking a quick glance at the hostages trembling on the platform.
The culprit turned around slowly and held his hands up in surrender. Harry stepped forward and picked the culprit's wand up off the floor and pocketed it, it would be used as evidence later on.
"I'm sorry," the culprit whimpered looking towards the woman and young girl. "I only wanted you
to accept me."
Then it hit Harry like a million bricks at once. The young man had only wanted to be accepted; to be loved by what appeared to be his Muggle wife and daughter. The woman hostage let out a sort of whimper from behind her gag.
"They're Muggles," Harry said, not as a question more like a statement.
The culprit nodded grimly as a few tears rolled down his cheek. "That's my daughter. Isn't she beautiful? My little Mally…"
Suddenly, the lights of the platform beamed on, flickering first then emitting a low hum. The culprit looked at Harry then at the tracks behind him, clearly indicating the track's importance.
Electricity, Harry thought. The tracks would be pulsing with electricity, enough to fry a human easily. The culprit was edging towards the platform edge, hands still held up above his head.
"Don't," Harry said sharply, looking down at the tracks. "You'll be out of Azkaban in a
month, maybe a few days. You haven't committed anything major."
The culprit seemed to smile sadly and looked at his wife and daughter. "I told them, a few days ago, you know.
I wouldn't…we wouldn't be here now if they'd just accepted me for who I am."
The sadness was glazing over the culprit's eyes and he choked back a sob. "It wasn't supposed to be this way. My world…"
He looked over at Harry. "Our world, the magical world is…it's…"
"Come out with your hands above your head!" Shouted a police officer from the top of the underground stairs.
The woman hostage began to scream from behind her gag, indicated to the police officer that she was there. The young girl hadn't moved yet or cried.
"I'm sorry," the culprit whispered.
Harry lunged for the man as he jumped backwards, off the platform's edge and landed in an angel position on the tracks. His body was electrocuted. Harry had to look away, his stomach was wrenching at the God awful smell. He covered his mouth to prevent vomiting and managed to stumble over to the woman hostage.
She'd passed out, from shock probably. The child was sleeping, probably a sleeping charm.
"For the last time, come out with your hands above your head!" shouted the police officer.
Harry rushed to the Stephen King poster and pushed in a few bricks around it with his wand. Instantly, a passage was revealed and Harry jumped inside quickly, sealing the gateway behind him.
~)*(~
"How could you endanger yourself so recklessly?"
General Jacobi Garner, a nice guy every so often but a prick at others. He had shouted at Harry, demoted him so many times now he didn't think that there was anything below Flobberworm.
"You caused a major catastrophe in that station," he shouted, his moustache flaring, reminding him very
much of Uncle Vernon. "That man was the son of one of our Ministry Officials!"
"What the bloody hell did you expect me to do?" Harry leapt to his feet defending himself. "All
I'd been told was that the man had kidnapped his own daughter and was holding her hostage in the underground! That
was it!"
"I told you, I gave you a direct order to pull out of the vicinity!" Garner said ferociously. "We
could've…assessed the situation, made some light of it."
Harry sighed. "The Muggle police would've been down in minutes! We couldn't afford for him to be found with a wand!"
At the word, Garner thrust out his hand. "Give me the wand."
Harry opened his robes and pulled out the culprit's wand, handing it over to his CO.
"The last spell was Lumos," Harry said. "It hasn't got a protective charm on it. None that I
could distinguish."
Garner looked at Harry, assessing the wand. "You think he was a Hogwarts boy?"
Harry shook his head. "Looked older. Said the girl was his kid."
"I'll have this sent down to the morgue," Garner said. "They're trying to…piece together
what's left of him."
"The best way to love is to love like you've never been hurt."
It's what they say, the Earth keeps spinning no matter how much you wish it wouldn't. No matter how much you cry, no matter how much you're hurting, the world will keep going because, in the end, you're just one man. Why would the world stop for one man?
Harry shook his head at the thought. Nothing was ever certain, nothing could ever be certain. He couldn't be sure of their safety, he couldn't guarantee them their lives up to twenty. What he did was for the best and he knew it, deep down inside he knew he'd done the right thing.
Then why did it hurt so damn much? Why did he feel guilty for it all?
"We are never so helplessly unhappy as when we lose love."
Sirius, holding a bottle of butterbeer in his hand came striding out onto the veranda. The party inside, the noise and the dancing, was to celebrate Harry's last day on the Phoenix squad, and the last day as an Auror. Tomorrow, he'd be just plain Harry again. Harry James Black.
"What does that mean, oh profound one?" Harry asked, laughing a little at Sirius' presumption.
Sirius leaned against the balcony railings swigging his butterbeer. "That was a wonderful quote from Sigmund Freud."
"The sex God of them all," Harry chuckled. "What does he have to do with today?"
Sirius turned to look at Harry, watching his twenty-two year old godson. "You still miss them don't
you?"
This made Harry uneasy. He felt unsettled still at the loss of his best friends. Yes, he missed them. Yes, he still thought about them. Yes, he still longed for Hermione. But everything, every emotion had to be surpressed. Once you become an Auror, you have to act without emotion and without hesitation. It becomes natural after a while, like riding a broom. You fully detach yourself from…yourself, from your emotions. You learn once and never forget how.
"I guess so," Harry replied slumping down into the veranda deck chair.
"It was a good service though, wasn't it?" Sirius asked flopping himself down into a deck chair opposite Harry.
Harry gave a small laugh, remembering Ron's wedding to Lavender. "Yeah, it was. Never thought I'd see Gred and Forge in tuxedos."
"I don't think anyone was anticipating that," Sirius laughed heartily.
Harry was silent for a second before continuing. "Did you see Percy's little girl?"
Sirius nodded. "Looks a perfect little lady."
"Five years old," Harry mused. "Five. I waited in the lounge room at the hospital with Bill and Ron
while she was being born. I held her when she was six minutes old."
"And now she's five," Sirius finished leaning back in the chair. "Time flies."
~Flashback~
Bill fumbled with the rings at the altar, finally handing them over to a well-dressed Ron.
"I Ronald Alan Weasley, take thee, Lavender Grace Brown, to be my lawful wedded wife," Ron recited slipping the ring onto lavender's finger. "I shall shoulder your burdens as you shoulder mine. I will love you and cherish you. I will safe guard you and protect you from all that would harm you."
Harry watched from the back with Sirius. They had finally been allowed in, insisting that they were friends of the bride and groom. Mrs Weasley had acted strangely towards Harry, as if she knew him, as if she recognised him but couldn't place where she'd seen him. That was the look he got from everyone.
Hermione was sat next to Ginny who was holding a handkerchief to her eyes and snivelling muffled sobs. They both looked gorgeous, dressed in burgundy silk gowns. Harry couldn't stop staring at Hermione, her hair done up perfectly, tied at the back in a bun whilst permitting strands fall down beside her cheeks. In that moment, Harry would've given anything to be standing beside her, squeezing her hand as they watched Ron's union in matrimony.
"And I, Lavender Grace Brown, take thee, Ronald Alan Weasley, to be lawful wedded husband," Lavender slipped the wedding band onto Ron's finger. "I shall shoulder your burdens as you shoulder mine. I will love you and cherish you. I will safe guard you and protect you from all that would harm you."
Sobs were heard from the pews, both men and women. Harry looked around to see most of Ron's Quidditch team in formal robe attire including Cho Chang on the arm of the young Puddlemere United manager. Fred and George were sitting with Mr Weasley and Bill was standing next to Ron. Parvati Patil was the maid of honour, dressed in a burgundy dress similar to Hermione and Ginny's.
"By the power vested in me," Dumbledore's eyes twinkled brightly as he raised his hands up into the air. "I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."
Ron leant forward and kissed Lavender, he was smiling, she was smiling and the crowds were bursting into sobs and cheers, claps and whistles. Dumbledore grinned and waved his hands. Suddenly, the room was covered in confetti and balloons. Ron and Lavender walked down the aisle again, this time husband and wife.
Dumbledore caught Harry's eyes and smiled graciously. He walked down the aisle along with the crowds when they all began to disperse outside to congratulate the couple.
"Terrific ceremony, Professor," Harry grinned shaking Dumbledore's hand. "They couldn't
have asked for a better one."
Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. "Perhaps. Perhaps they might've wanted a special someone to be here,
Harry."
Harry smiled happily. "I am here, Professor. I'll be around for a while yet."
"I'd like to think so, Harry," Dumbledore grinned whilst shaking Sirius's hand. "Come
now. There's a piece of Victoria sponge cake with my name on it."
~End of Flashback~
"I'm glad I saw it," Harry grinned remembering the ceremony. "Everything was just perfect for
them."
"Oh, to be in love again," Sirius said happily. "You never truly appreciate something until it's
gone, do you?"
Harry coughed a little. "No. No, I guess you don't."
Sirius swigged the last of his butterbeer. "Coming inside? Everyone wants to see your jive bug get to
work."