Hello again ! I just wanna say that the next update might not happen next Friday. I'm gonna try to update regularly every Friday- but it takes a little longer than expected to type everything up. I love you all for not telling me how stupid I am or how warped my mind is because I wrote this fic. I promise I'll make it interesting (: enjoy chapter two !
xo-
michele
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"Hermione? Hermione? There, see? She just fainted. I told you she didn't die. Honestly, sometimes I swear you two are still eleven years old."
Slowly, Hermione opened her eyes to see Ginny kneeling above her. She already knew that the two boys standing most likely behind Ginny were Harry and Ron.
"Yeah?" Hermione heard Ron say. She could imagine what he looked like at that moment; a challenging look in his eyes, and his ears nearly matching the color of his hair. "She could have fooled anyone into thinking she was dead with the way she fell like that."
"Yes, minus the fact that she was breathing," Ginny drawled, sarcasm dripping from every word.
"Come on, guys," Hermione's stomach did an all-too familiar flip-flop at the sound of Harry's voice. "This isn't the first thing she needs to hear from us after just waking up."
Holding her head, Hermione slowly sat up and took in her surroundings. She seemed to be in a room just off the sanctuary- she could still hear the murmur of people leaving the church. Blinking rapidly at the lights above her, she noticed Ron and smiled at him. He hadn't changed at all since she had left; same flaming red hair, warm eyes… he had lost a bit of weight, too. Playing for the Chudley Cannons had certainly changed his physique. Just then the other redhead shook her hair, causing Hermione to glance at Ginny. She had grown her hair down to about her belly button. She had also filled out quite a bit- she wasn't the "innocent little girl" Hermione had left behind.
Hermione's heart fluttered when she saw Harry. His hair was as uncontrollable as ever, but his gaze wasn't obstructed by glasses anymore. He must have gotten contacts somewhere in that five year window, Hermione thought briefly. How did this happen? This wasn't an accident- it couldn't be.
Suddenly Hermione started laughing, completely oblivious to the dumbfounded looks she was receiving. Giggling, then sighing softly, she spoke.
"You guys are funny," she said, smiling widely. "Seriously, abso-bloody-lutely hilarious. I don't think I could have pulled that off. Now, what have you done with James?"
The dumbfounded looks didn't cease.
"Who's James?" Ginny asked, tilting her head to one side.
"My fiancé," Hermione replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "I know you guys were behind all of this, you can take the incredulous looks off your faces now."
"Hermione…" Ron said, taking a step towards her. "I don't think you understand fully what just happened. We're a bit confused, too. Somehow, you accidentally married Harry."
"That's preposterous," Hermione said, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms over her chest. "You can't accidentally marry someone- it's completely impossible. My mother always said-" she stopped talking abruptly. "My mother!" she said, quickly standing up- a difficult task with her wedding dress still on. "Where's my purse?" Hermione asked to no one in particular.
Without waiting for an answer, her eyes swept over the room and found it on a chair in the corner. Picking it up, she hurried into a closed off part of the room that Harry, Ron, and Ginny were currently in.
Flipping open her mobile, she noticed she had four or five missed calls. Making a mental note to check them later, Hermione quickly dialed her mother's number. After a few rings, she heard a click.
"Hello?" her mother said.
"Mum!" Hermione practically shouted.
"Hermione!" Helen said, surprised. "Where are you? I've been trying to call you- James did, too. You apparently weren't by your mobile."
No, I was too preoccupied "accidentally" marrying my best friend, Hermione thought bitterly.
"Mum, quick, tell me something," Hermione said urgently. "I was supposed to get married in the Westminster Abbey, right?" There was a pause.
"Why, no," Helen said. "I would have picked there- it was so beautiful. But coincidentally, and quite oddly, actually, there was a wedding booked for the same time. I picked the Westminster Cathedral, instead. I told Danielle to tell you… you didn't get the message, I'm guessing."
"The Westminster Cathedral?" Hermione asked. "Oh, no."
~*~
"So, Harry," Ron said seriously, turning towards his best friend. "or Har-Bear," Harry flinched subconsciously at his would-be wife's pet name for him. "Why didn't Clarissa, the actual bride, show up?"
"That's a good question, Ron," Harry said, sitting down and cradling his face in his hands. "I can't answer that, go ask Clarissa."
"But she doesn't like me," Ron complained.
"That's odd," Ginny said, speaking for the first time in a while. "She likes me."
"Yeah," Ron said, then continued so quietly Ginny had to resort to lip reading. "Don't tell Harry, but I think she likes women."
Stifling a giggle, then hurriedly regaining a straight face, Ginny turned to Harry.
"Why don't you call her, Harry," she suggested. "At least figure out why she didn't turn up." Harry sighed.
"Yeah," he muttered, standing up. "I suppose I should." Walking over to the phone mounted on the wall, Harry put the receiver to his ear and dialed the very familiar number to Clarissa's flat.
"Hello?" someone said.
"Hey Liz," said Harry, recognizing the voice of Clarissa's flat mate. "Have you seen my fiancé?"
"Yeah," Liz replied. "She's here- packing everything."
"Packing everything?" Harry asked. "Where's she going?"
"She's moving, silly," said Liz. "She's going to live in Australia."
"Australia?" asked Harry. "What-" but he was cut off by a shrill voice.
"LIZ!" Harry heard Clarissa bellow.
"Shit," Liz muttered. "Probably shouldn't have had it on speakerphone. Lissy, was I not supposed to tell him about this, or the tattoo?"
Mouthing "A tattoo?", Harry couldn't make out the next string of words, but soon enough Clarissa had taken the phone off the receiver.
"Hey, Harry," she said slowly.
"Uh, hi," said Harry. "So, Australia?"
"I was going to tell you," Clarissa said quickly. "I just couldn't find a decent time to. Har-Bear, we've had an amazing time together. And I feel happy with you, I just- I can't marry you. I'm sorry."
"You were going to just go to Australia and leave me looking like an idiot standing at the alter?" Harry asked, his anger evident.
"No, you would have gotten a call before I jumped on the plane," Clarissa muttered helplessly. "I'm sorry, Harry. I could tell you weren't very happy with me, anyway."
"What do you mean, I wasn't happy with you?" Harry asked. "Of course I was happy with you."
"Harry," said Clarissa. "I know when a man looks at me and sees another woman." With that, there was a faint click. Hanging up the phone and sighing heavily, Harry turned to his friends.
"You must've caught the jist of that conversation," he said.
"That your fiancé's going to Australia and she has a tattoo?" Ron guessed.
"That's about it," said Harry. "She was going to leave me at the alter. She was going to break the wedding off. She told me that she knows when a man looks at her and sees another woman."
"Good thing you didn't marry her, then," Ron said. "She's off her rocker."
"Sod off, Ron," Ginny said sharply. Moving over to Harry, she put comforting hands on his shoulders. "Are you going to be alright?" she asked him.
"Yeah," Harry said softly. "I think I am."
Just then Hermione cautiously walked in.
"I just wanted to calmly discuss this whole matter to figure out what the bloody hell happened and how we can fix it," she said in one breath.
"Okay," Harry said. "First things first, how did you get here? I mean, who told you to come here?"
"I got a call," Hermione said. "Telling me that the wedding was supposed to have started already and that I should come immediately to the Westminster Abbey."
"That's the message I left Clarissa," Ron said slowly.
"You sound like Brian!" Hermione exclaimed. "My fiancé's best man," she added in response to Ron's questioning look.
"So you called Mione instead of Clarissa?" Harry asked, staring at Ron as if he had grown another head.
"Ginny gave me the number," Ron accused, pointing at his sister.
"Gin?" Hermione asked. "Can I see the number that you gave Ron?"
"Sure," Ginny said. Walking over to the desk in the room, she picked up a small piece of parchment and handed it to Hermione. After looking it over, she looked up at the group.
"Mine and Clarissa's area code is the same," Hermione stated. "Our first three numbers are the same. The last four digits would be the same, but hers is 9513 and mine is 9518."
Ron snatched the paper from Hermione's hands. "Ginny!" he exclaimed. "Your finger smudged the last number! And you know I'm still learning to use the felly tone- you're lucky I didn't call some old bat."
"But Ronald, you know my mobile number," Hermione pointed out. "Shouldn't you have recognized that you were dialing it?"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Harry interrupted. "How does Ron know your mobile number?"
"That's not important right now," Hermione said quickly, not daring to look Harry in the eye. "We'll explain it later- maybe. In the mean time I have to fix this." Taking a deep breath, she said, "I'll go file for an annulment."
"What?" Harry asked.
"I don't believe I stuttered," Hermione said maliciously, walking back into the other room.
"Three galleons says that Hermione hasn't had caffeine all day," Ron grinned, breaking the silence.
~*~
"Shit!" Hermione muttered just after closing her mobile. Walking back out and addressing Harry, Ron, and Ginny, Hermione said, "Well this is just bloody fantastic."
"What?" Ginny asked, leaning forward in the chair she was sitting in.
"I can't get a meeting in with a judge anywhere for at least a month," Hermione said, leaning against the wall.
"So… what exactly does that mean?" Ron asked, his eyebrows raised.
"It means that Hermione and I are going to be legally married for quite some time," Harry answered quietly. Just then, Ginny smirked.
"Oh, Hermione," she said in a sing song voice, standing up. "Would you please come talk to me for a minute in this little room?"
"Sure…" Hermione answered, eyeing Ginny suspiciously as she followed her. Once they were inside, Ginny turned to Hermione.
"You're a little on edge," she stated. "More so than what I would consider normal for you. Are you okay?"
"Yeah," Hermione sighed. "I'm fine. I'm just a little stressed and I haven't had any caffeine since yesterday."
"Damn," Ginny muttered. "I owe Ron three galleons."
"Ginny," said Hermione. "I'm sure that's not the reason you asked to speak to me privately?"
"Well, no," Ginny said. "Mione, the fates have dealt you a sweet, sweet card."
"I thought I told fate to fuck off when I left," Hermione said bitterly.
"By any chance do you curse when you haven't had caffeine?" Ginny asked, tilting her head to one side.
"I've been told that, yes," said Hermione. "But that's not important. Why did you want to talk to me?"
"I have a proposition for you," Ginny said, perking up a bit. "See, since you and Harry are legally married and everything, and most married couples live together…"
"You want me to live with Harry?" Hermione asked. "Are you insane?"
"Come on, Hermione," Ginny whined. "Do it for me? I'll tell you what- live with him for a month, that's all. Just about until you can get in to see a judge for the annulment. After that I won't say a word about you and Harry."
Hermione raised an eyebrow at Ginny's proposition. "You promise?" she said.
"I promise," Ginny said quickly. "But this deal does mean that you go out and act like a couple. Harry doesn't have to know about that, but if you don't act like a pair of newlyweds in public, I can still pester you about you and him."
"Fine," Hermione conceded. "But only a month."
"Perfect!" Ginny said, beaming. "Let's go tell the guys." She led the way out to the larger room.
"Okay!" said Ginny. "Here's the deal. Harry and Mione are going to live together for a while. Kay? Kay. Now whose place are they going to live at?"
"Not ours," Ron said. "There isn't any room as it is, with you, Harry, and me there."
"We can live in my flat," Hermione offered reluctantly. "I'm there by myself, anyway."
"Terrific!" Ginny exclaimed, putting her hands together. "So we'll have Harry get everything he needs and then Hermione can move him in."
"Hey!" Harry said, a hurt look on his face. "Do I get any say in this at all?"
"No," Ginny said solemnly, shaking her head. "Now go get your things and go with Hermione."
Harry glared at Ginny for a moment, muttered "Fine," then hesitantly took Hermione's arm and Apparated them both into Harry's, Ron's, and Ginny's flat.
~*~
"This is… nice," Hermione commented as she stood in the middle of the living room. Harry was in his bedroom, haphazardly throwing his clothes into a trunk.
"Don't sugar coat it, Hermione," Harry said, his voice floating to Hermione's ears. "I know it's quite messy and if you're not careful your foot will stick to the floor." At this comment Hermione laughed.
"Well… all it needs is a little tidying up, really," she said. "You could have it halfway decent looking with a little hard work."
Harry laughed, walking out of his room. "Yeah, sure," he said.
"You got everything?" Hermione said, narrowly avoiding something on the floor.
"Yeah," Harry answered, patting his pockets to indicate that they had been shrunk for easy travel. "Let's go."
Hermione grabbed his arm and Apparated them into a closet on the main floor of her flat building. After walking to the elevator, and getting a series of bewildered looks from the man behind the front desk, the two of them made it to Hermione's flat. Spinning around suddenly, she turned to look at Harry.
"Shh," she said softly, placing a finger against her pursed lips. "I don't want Charlotte to see you."
Playing along, Harry nodded and tried not to make a sound. The second Hermione put the key in the lock, however, Charlotte's flat door opened.
"Hermione," Charlotte said, immediately turning her attention to her friend. "What are you doing here? I thought you'd be on a plane to the Caribbean by now. What happened at the wedding? And why are you here with…" she trailed off, slowly turning to face Harry. "Cute guy?" she finished, tilting her head to one side and grinning.
Hermione laughed softly. "Charlotte, this is Harry," she said, gesturing to the man beside her. Harry politely shook her hand, murmuring "Hello, Charlotte."
"Oh, please, call me Char," Charlotte said, batting her eyelashes. "Tell me something, Harry; are you single?"
"He's married," Hermione stated, trying and failing to hide her amusement.
"What a shame," Charlotte said, her face falling slightly. "Well, if it doesn't work out, Harry, call me." With a wink, Charlotte disappeared behind her door once more. Sighing and shaking her head, Hermione turned the key and opened the door.
"Wow," Harry murmured as he walked inside. The entire place was spotless- no surprise there. The kitchen had a few dishes in the sink- various soap bubbles remained. Suddenly he chuckled.
"I should have known," Harry called to Hermione, who was in the other room. "Only you would have an entire wall converted into a bookshelf."
The wall just opposite of the kitchen had, in fact, been changed into a bookshelf practically overflowing with a variety of different books.
"Problem with it?" Hermione asked, walking out of the other room with a few blankets in her arms.
"No, no," Harry said quickly. "It's nice to see you haven't changed after all this time."
Hermione smiled slightly. Silently, she handed him the pile of blankets. "It's been a long day," she said. "We can discuss this whole matter in the morning. You can sleep on the couch- it pulls out into a bed."
Harry smiled. Taking the blankets from her and placing them on the couch, he turned to face her.
"Well… good night," he said softly, staring into her eyes.
"Good night," she whispered. After looking at him for a second longer, she looked as though she meant to say something, but thought better of it and practically sprinted to her bedroom.
~*~
Only one thing in the world could keep Hermione up at night- a problem. Something left unresolved. So as she flipped over from side to side, Hermione thought that this particular problem should be easy enough to ignore, just for tonight. She'd been doing it for so long is had become habit.
But it certainly didn't help that both her problem and her solution was sleeping in the other room on her couch.
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