JKR owns.
At Shell Cottage
Chapter Two
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[AN] Sorry it's taken me so long. I've just been trying to figure out how I can end this the way I want and still have it make sense. :P
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(Shell Cottage; 8:11 a.m.)
When Hermione woke up the next morning, she felt… different. There was a soreness coming from below her navel, but it wasn't like actual pain. It was more of a welcoming soreness. That soreness meant that she was now a woman.
And it was all thanks to Harry Potter.
Who would have guessed that Harry and Hermione would be the ones to lose their virginities first, and to each other no less? Before last night, it had only been one of Hermione's wildest dreams. But now, it was looking very much like her reality.
With her eyes still closed, a small grin spread across her swollen lips. The idea of her and Harry together seemed so surreal to her.
Blindly, she reached out to where she thought Harry's naked body would be. She patted around on the cold sheets for a few moments before she finally opened her eyes. Her small smile slowly disappeared.
Hermione quickly sat up from the bed, clutching the sheets to her chest. Her eyes scanned the white-washed room, but found no one. She looked over the bed, trying to get a glimpse of Harry's rumpled pajama's. However, they were gone.
Harry was gone.
The thrill she had been experiencing slipped away from her in a blunt manner; like snow falling from a tree branch. Her mind was having trouble comprehending the situation. A part of her just couldn't accept that Harry could just so easily take off the morning after. But then again, a large part of her easily understood why he did. It's not like he ever promised her anything. It's not like because they had sex, then Harry would actually want to be with her…
There was a sudden knock at the door and Hermione jerked her head towards the noise.
"'Ermione, are you up yet?" called Fleur's accented voice.
With a heavy sigh, Hermione sunk back into the cold sheets. She wasn't ready to face everyone in the house yet. She was sure she'd have to eventually that day, but surely she could wait a bit longer.
…
1 Hour Later…
…
Hermione sat silently at the dining table, deftly twisting her fork in her hand and every now and then poking it into her pile of cold eggs.
Fleur had come back forty five minutes after her first attempt and demanded that Hermione get up and have some breakfast. Hermione had been terrified as she left her room and cautiously made her way to the kitchen, scared that she'd come face to face with Harry. Alas, when she had finally made it to the kitchen. Harry was missing, and Ron was working on his third serving.
Ron, Bill, and Fleur had tried to involve Hermione in idle conversation, but every time they looked to her for a response, she kept silent.
She finally broke her silence when Bill and Fleur got up and started doing dishes. Hermione turned to Ron pointedly, "Where's Harry?"
"I dunno," Ron answered, shoving a piece of toast into his mouth.
Hermione suppressed rolling her eyes, "What do you mean you don't know?"
"He was up earlier," Ron replied after he swallowed, "He ate and then went back to our room. So I guess he's in our room. Why?"
"Just wondering," Hermione answered, going back to her untouched food.
"He's probably making plans for Gryffindor's sword," Ron commented after a few moments.
Hermione gave him a sharp look, "He's making plans? With who?"
"Griphook."
Hermione noticed that she hadn't seen the old goblin all morning. It irked her that Harry was making plans with him alone. Griphook didn't really seem to have Harry's best interest at heart, so really what assistance could he be providing?
"We should probably go in and see if we could help, huh?" Ron asked, in a manner that suggested she was thinking along those same lines.
"Oh, um-" Hermione paused, her heart instantly kicking into overdrive. Was she ready to see Harry again? What if he didn't want her help this time?
A door could be heard opening and closing further off in the house. Hermione's stomach fluttered, and her eyes darted around in a frenzy.
She didn't care if she was being a coward; she couldn't face Harry right now. Suddenly, she stood up from the table, "Um, I'm not feeling too well so… I'm going to go for a walk on the beach."
Without waiting for a response, Hermione turned and hurried out of the room. Fortunately, she was able to escape in time before Harry nervously walked into the kitchen.
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( Pembrokenshire Beach 9:18 a.m.)
After running back to her room and grabbing her shoes and wand, Hermione left the cottage, making her escape into the more wooded part of the beach. She'd found a decent, secluded spot on the sand and had only been sitting there for a few minutes when she heard a voice sound behind her.
"You shouldn't be out here by yourself," Harry said from a few inches behind her.
Hermione gasped and spun her head around to look up at the voice. She paused for a few seconds when she saw that it was Harry. Finally though, she ripped her eyes away from his and turned back to face the ocean.
Harry tried to ignore the hurt evident in her eyes, "I'm serious Hermione, it's not safe for you to run off by yourself."
"I have my wand."
"Still."
Silence engulfed them as Harry continued to stare at Hermione's back, and as she stared absently out into the dark blue waves. The tense atmosphere was starting to get to both of them. Hermione had never recalled feeling so uncomfortable around Harry before- usually he made her feel so safe.
Finally, the quietness became too much, "What do you want, Harry?"
Harry thought about her question for a moment. Honestly, there were many things he wanted, but most of them he knew he couldn't put into words. He knew that if he told her the truth, it'd only hurt her more.
After a couple of seconds, he'd yet to answer. So instead of making something up, he just went with what he was thinking, "That's kind of a difficult question to answer, Hermione."
"No it's not; not if you answer it honestly."
Harry came forward and sat down next to her, keeping enough space between the two so that Hermione knew he wasn't trying to take advantage of the situation, or anything. With a thoughtful face, he turned to her and asked her the same, "Well, what do you want?"
Hermione bit her lip and shrugged, "For things to be simple."
Harry nodded in agreement. That was definitely something he wished for, but his actions last night might've proven otherwise. With a sigh, he forced himself to face the girl that had basically turned his world upside down in the past ten hours.
"Hermione, about last night-"
"We don't have to talk about it," she cut him off quickly, almost frantically, "I don't know what came over me… It was obviously a mistake, so we can just forget about it."
Harry furrowed his eyebrows. If that's what she really felt, then it kind of made some sense. Still, he found himself opening his mouth and forming the words to his next, uncomfortable, question, "Hermione, do you… do you like Ron? Like, really like him?"
Hermione's eyes narrowed in an affronted manner, before she shook her head firmly, "No."
Harry's eyes went wide in surprise, "Oh. So last night had nothing to do with him?"
"Of course not," Hermione told him in an obvious tone.
Harry stopped himself from letting 'good' slip out. Honestly, he didn't really understand the basis of his theory, but he'd sort of imagined that Hermione had only been so willing because she wanted to like, learn, for Ron. Harry shook his head at the disgusting thought; how could he even think of something that stupid? Hermione wasn't shallow like that, and she definitely wasn't a girl to be with just anyone. But if that was also true, then there was something that Hermione wasn't telling him. Did she really think last night was a mistake?
Harry wracked his brain for anything he might've done wrong to make her feel that way. Suddenly, his mind stopped on the conversation that he and Ron had had with the twins back in their forth year, the day after the Yule Ball. Nervously, he glanced up to Hermione, "Did I hurt you? I didn't mean to be so…"
Hermione shook her head. He had hurt her, but it wasn't during their lovemaking, "You were fine."
"Oh," Harry mumbled in relief, before he raised an eyebrow at her comment. He couldn't help but give her a playful smile, "Just fine?"
The corners of Hermione's lips twitched up in an attempting smile, "No… you were perfect." Hermione knew that Harry was giving her a wide eyed look, but she couldn't help confessing the truth. Last night was everything she ever wanted her first time to be.
Harry sighed. He couldn't stand the hurt in her voice anymore, "Hermione… I only left because… because I thought I might've taken advantage of you last night. You were in such a fragile state, and I wasn't very sensitive to that-"
"Harry, I'm not made of glass," she cut him off with a heated look.
Harry swallowed, "I know, but still. We've been just friends for so long… I didn't want you to hate me." He hated himself for sounding so weak in front of her, but it was the truth. He couldn't stand for Hermione ignoring him. He needed her…
Luckily, Hermione sent him a softer look, "I don't."
"That's good," Harry mumbled in relief, looking down to his knees, "I wouldn't be able to live with myself otherwise…"
"So what now?" Hermione asked in a whisper after a couple tranquil moments. No matter how sweet Harry was being right now, the truth of the matter was that he did leave after they'd done the most sacred of acts. Even if he did feel like he'd taken advantage of her, he should've known that leaving wouldn't have made the situation any better. Why couldn't he predict that that would be what made Hermione feel used? Why did he have to be such a… boy?
Hermione shook her head to herself as the drama unfolded in her head. At least she knew one thing for sure, and that was that she couldn't just be his friend anymore. Last night had forever changed their relationship. She'd never be able to look at him and not remember the feel of his lips on her skin…
"Hermione…" Harry said, briefly closing his eyes for a moment, before turning to look at her, "Last night… it-it… it was the best night of my life. I never knew I could feel like… that…" By the time he had finished, his cheeks were red, and he was looking back down to his feet.
Hermione's mouth almost fell open at his confession. She had expected for Harry to say that they'd made a mistake and they should just forget about it. Never in a million years would she have expected that Harry would say that it was the best night of his life. She let out an awestruck breath, before quietly revealing her own secret, "I've wanted it for a long time now."
"Really?" Harry asked in surprise.
Biting her lip, she nodded, "Yes."
To her confusion, Harry shook his head, "I don't think I've ever given you enough credit."
"What do you mean?"
He sighed, "I mean you've been right in front of me this entire time, but I've only just realized how much… how much I want you…"
Hermione's mouth really did fall open that time, "Yeah?"
Harry nodded, "I don't know what it is with you, Hermione, but you make me feel like I can do anything."
"You're a great wizard, Harry. You always have been," she finished, almost shyly.
Harry was quiet. He didn't exactly mean it like that, but while they were on the topic, he might as well get out the inevitable insecurity that had been swimming around in his head ever since he'd woken up that morning, "Hermione, I-I'm probably going to die soon. It'd be unfair to promise you anything."
Hermione turned and gave him a penetrating look. For the first time, the vulnerability in his eyes was evident. She'd always had her gut feeling, but for the first time, Harry actually looked scared.
And it was that knowledge, that compelled her to say what she'd been feeling for the past year, "I love you Harry. No matter what happens, I know you'll be okay. I just know it."
His stomach unwillingly fluttered at her words, and he couldn't fight the small smile that appeared on his lips, "If there's ever a time for you to be right, I really hope it's now."
"You're stronger than you know," Hermione said convincingly, "And no matter how much I believe in you, it's your own confidence that'll make the difference."
Harry was quiet for a few moments, staring down at the sand beneath his feet, before he finally looked up. He shook his head in a surreal manner, "How… how can you be like that?"
"What do you mean?" Hermione tensed, wondering if she had said something wrong.
"How can you love me?" he finally asked in a timid whisper. He knew that he'd never be able to sound so insecure or weak in front of anyone but Hermione. That was part of the reason why he needed her so much. Even so, that didn't stop him from not understanding why someone like her could be so sure of him in a way that didn't put any pressure on him.
Hermione bit her lip as she shrugged, "It's not really something I can explain, but I think it's always been there."
"I wish you would have said something sooner," Harry said wistfully.
Hermione gave him a look, "How would you have reacted if I had?"
"I don't know…" Harry started honestly, " But you've always been the one to make me see and understand things. I'd be lost without your guidance."
Again, Hermione only shrugged, "I was scared that if I said something and you didn't feel the same way that it would ruin our friendship."
"Is that why you said you can't be my friend anymore?"
"It just hurts to see you with other people," Hermione admitted quietly. She glanced up to see Harry's reaction, and not surprisingly found a blameworthy look on his face, "I don't say that to make you feel guilty, Harry. I just want both of us to be happy."
"Hermione, you do make me happy," he told her, surprised that she would think anything else.
Hermione sighed, "Are you just saying that for the sake of the conversation?"
"No, I'm saying it because it's the truth," he answered sincerely, turning in the sand so that he was fully facing her. He gently turned her cheek so that she too was looking at him, "No one has ever made me feel as good as you make me feel. Not even Ginny. If things were different, nothing would stop me from wanting to be with you."
"But things aren't different. Not yet at least."
This time, it was Harry who sighed, "Exactly. I-I don't want to put you in anymore danger than you already are. You've already almost died twice because of me. I'd kill myself if you actually did."
Hermione turned away from him and let her eyes wander out over the ocean. She got that Harry was protective, but she didn't appreciate getting the same excuse that he'd given to Ginny. She was already in danger as Harry's best friend and accomplice; that status wouldn't change just because their relationship became something more.
Instead of barraging him on his theory, Hermione found a gentler way to broach the topic, "My parents always told me that if you want something hard enough that it'll happen. Do you think that's true?"
"I hope so," Harry nodded simply.
"Harry, that day," she started, not needing to clarify what day she was talking about, "may be getting closer, but it's not today. Hopefully it's not tomorrow. If we make each other happy like that, why should we stay away?"
Staring into her eyes for that moment, she seemed to be completely right. However, it didn't take long for the pessimism to weigh in, "What if someone finds out? What if someone uses you to get to me?"
"What if the world blows up, Harry?" Hermione returned, giving him a narrowing look, "We can't live our lives like that. And before you say anything else, you still have a pulse. You're not dead yet, and if I have it my way you won't die until you're a very old, old man. So old that you won't even be able to remember this conversation."
Harry shook his head and sent her a wry smile, "I'm never going to forget this."
Hermione smiled back, and before she could question what she was doing, she leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. She could tell that Harry was a little surprised, but was happy when he kissed her back with equal force. After a couple of moments, Hermione broke the kiss, but didn't move away. "Don't forget that either, then," she whispered.
Harry appeared quite baffled for a moment, before a dazed expression settled on his face, "Hermione, I-I love you too. Just so you know…"
To be honest, he didn't know what the future held in store for him. However, he did know what he was feeling, and right now seemed like the perfect time to tell her before it was possibly too late.
"I believe you," Hermione said quietly, too amazed to be any louder. Harry couldn't help but smile back, and after a few seconds of staring into each other's eyes, Harry was eager to get another taste.
As their lips met again, they both came to peace with the knowledge that, whether either of them lived or died, they'd both confessed their love and desire for each other. And when they thought about it, that's really what mattered most. Now, Harry wanted nothing more than to win this war and start his long, long life with Hermione.
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Thanks for reading everyone! If you could take the time, please leave a review. I always love to hear respectful feedback. :]
Oh, and go read my other two shot, Don't Let Me Go.