The rain was pounding the tent, tears were pouring down Hermione's face, and the excitement of a few minutes before had vanished as if it had never been, a short-lived firework that had flared and died, leaving everything dark, wet and cold. The sword of Gryffindor was hidden they knew not where, and they were three teenagers in a tent whose only achievement was not, yet, to be dead…
…`I…' She looked anguished. `Yes - yes, I'm staying. Ron, we said we'd go with Harry, we said we'd help-`
`I get it. You choose him.'
`Ron, no-please-come back, come back!'
She was impeded by her own Shield Charm; by the time she had removed it, he had already stormed into the night. Harry stood quite still and silent, listening to her sobbing and calling Ron's name amongst the trees.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows p. 253-254
J.K. Rowling
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I've never been as angry with Ron as I was the moment he walked out of the tent and didn't look back. It's one thing losing it with me, but he's Harry's best friend and he should understand that means sticking together even if he didn't think we were going in the right direction.
I just feel like I want to punch something or break something. I don't know where my own emotions end and the Horcrux begins now. I know it amplifies all the negative emotions we have and picks up on anger and aggression. Ron obviously had so much more trouble controlling his emotions while wearing it than Harry and I did, but then again, Ron's never had to control his emotions or actions, he's had a large understanding family and he's never been the outsider.
I haven't seen Harry in such a foul mood for quite some time. He's obviously completely torn between furious anger at Ron and being hurt that Ron left us, though god knows he could still just be obsessing about the Hallows again instead of thinking about Horcruxes. The only thing to do tonight is to let him stew over things and start afresh in the morning. I still don't feel safe here; it's just something about camping. However many charms we put up we could be surrounded at any time, I'd feel much safer with a solid wall behind us and a web of charms and protections over us as we sleep. We can't stay in this horrid tent forever, it smelt even before we borrowed it and after having Ron's feet in here for so long there's no stay-fresh charm on the planet that can completely remove the smell of stale feet.
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I didn't sleep last night. I just couldn't stop thinking, and I didn't want to burden Harry with the Horcrux after everything. Hopefully a few hours to clear his head will help him focus, and I couldn't have slept with the Horcrux that close to my skin, it gives me the most awful nightmares.
The one thought that stayed with me all night, and seemed to be burned into the walls of the tent as I gazed at them, was that we're running out of time. If only we had more time - uninterrupted time - to research and hunt for the Horcruxes in less danger then we could be ready. Right now it feels like we're at the end of a rapidly unravelling ball of string, Voldemort gets stronger by the day, we get more tired, more disillusioned and more cut off from everyone and any resources as he gets stronger.
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The sun is rising now and I can feel the slow warmth seeping through the canvas of the tent wall. I know now what we must do, I believe it can be done and that it's the only way. I must find a way.
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