Love is Hope: Life after fifth year

***

Warm and comfortable, Hermione dimly registered voices penetrating her fuzzy mind.

“So that’s like her punishment? But isn’t that like rewarding her, too? Knowing Hermione she was dying to get to learn Occlumency...”

“But that’s just it, for now she isn’t really learning it, I mean, you *could* consider it like Snape’s technique, but at least Snape knew what he was doing, well, sort of. I’m afraid I’m going to really hurt her. I have no idea why Dumbledore let me do this...”

“Well, you have to do it on someone, and not to be harsh or something but I’d rather have it be Hermione then me. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to see her hurt either, but didn’t Dumbledore say she wanted to, anyway? And he wouldn’t let you do this to her if there was a possibility she’d get hurt”

“Yeah, but I don’t think she bargained the collapsing thing. Maybe I should go easier on her next time, but she got really mad when she realised I was going soft on her... I just don’t want her to get hurt, but if I do something about it, she gets all prissy and offended”

“Girls, I’ll never understand them. So, you saw inside her head, then? Any interesting ‘inside-information’?”

“Well, it’s not like I’m any good already, but I did see some things, most of the things were even about you and me, and it’s really weird to see those things from her point of view, especially when you get her feelings transferred, too”

“Blimey, getting a girl’s feelings transferred to you? Freaky... Hey, maybe you’ll get to understand girls after all this! You could write the rest of us a guide into the inner-workings of a girl’s mind!”

“Well, it’s not like Hermione’s really like other girls, now is she?”

Hermione cleared her throat: “I heard that”

Ron almost squealed like a girl, he was that startled: “Bloody hell, Hermione. How long have you been awake?”

“Long enough to know that you the two of you are as bad as Lavender and Parvati” Pushing the blanket that covered her away she sat up; they were in the empty Gryffindor common room, in the couch in front of the fire.

“What! You better be joking! We were discussing what happened in Dumbledore’s office! We weren’t gossiping!”

“You just keep telling yourself that...”

“We were just worried about you!”

“Why? Because suddenly it occurred to you that I’m a girl, and as such I couldn’t possibly take care of myself as I’ve always have!”

“Yes! I mean, no! You’re just so/”

“Right, thanks but no thanks. I’m going to bed, and Harry, if I get even the tiniest feeling you’re holding back, you won’t be able to sit properly on your broom, ever!”

Hermione stomped up to her dormitory, she didn’t know why they suddenly fussed over her. She was the one who worried about them, not the other way around! Ok, maybe on some level it was nice to have them acknowledge she was a girl, at least it would’ve been nice if they’d thought of that like... before the Yule Ball or something. But that didn’t mean she was defenceless! She’d always liked the way they treated her differently from other girls, accepted her more or less, despite the fact that she came over bossy and maybe to some a little unfeminine...

***

The rest of the week went by uneventfully. The classes she had with the Slytherins still tried to pester her about anything and everything, but she’d gotten so used to it, that she was starting to feel that if they’d ever stop, she’d go ahead and miss their taunts... Malfoy seemed to be reloaded since the news of the outbreak reached the world, and was on Harry’s back constantly. Though none other incident on the Voldemort-front seemed to take place. Everyday the Prophet was brought to her she tried to stay calm and every time she was relieved nothing had happened, for now.

The news that Hermione had to serve one detention every week for the rest of the year, because she’d ‘accidentally’ read a book too many from the Restricted Section had made it through Hogwarts faster then you could say ‘Busted!’. Hermione just thought it was a nice change from the speculation about her love life.

Eventually she’d gotten a reply from Viktor, a month after the article, stating he had appreciated her friendship, but with the oncoming wedding he didn’t feel it appropriate to have a female friend, in other words it was an Adieu-letter. She’d written a congratulations card for his engagement, and forced herself to forget about it.

After another week of non-stop studying and homework, Saturday came around, and with that the new DA meeting. Harry had put all old DA-members with a group containing students from a year lower then the previous week, except of course Hermione, Ginny and Neville who had the seventh years.

Hermione was again assigned to the Ravenclaws, but the contrast was marking. They tried to snub her, but then again, they didn’t know Hermione. After they made it clear they thought Cho was a better teacher, because she was able to perform a corporal patronus, Hermione showed them her otter. Grudgingly they got to work. Harry had promised that next week, the ones that were deemed ready, would actually get to duel.

Cho had been avoiding her since the incident in the train, and Hermione didn’t know just how much Harry had seen from her mind about that, and if he’d said anything to Cho about it. She didn’t even know if they still talked... What she did know was that she looked a lot less smug after today’s meeting, as if she had found it a special sign that Harry had let Hermione work with the first years and she with the seventh years. But was now realising that Harry hadn’t meant with it, what she thought it had meant.

Hermione was starting to feel sorry for the girl. She hadn’t been made Head Girl, even if two years back it had looked like she would be the only one in her year for the job; she’d resigned from her Quidditch team, before they could kick her out, Roger Davies had graduated, Michael avoided her like the plague and it didn’t seem any Gryffindor, nor Ravanclaw wanted to date her anymore. Ravenclaws because she’d rejected Roger in favour of Harry in the first place, and because she’d only used Michael Corner to make Harry jealous. Gryffindors, because they believed she’d stolen Michael from Ginny, and that she’d cheated on Harry...

Of course this was only said about her behind her back, because she still was one of the most popular girls in school, and they very well couldn’t tell her all that in her pretty face now could they? Hermione shuddered at the idea of having so many false friends, and so many shallow intrigues ruling your life... She wouldn’t trade it for the world. Not that she didn’t have her own rumours about an in reality non-existent love life, but at least no one that mattered was being nice to her face, and spreading venom behind her back. At least that’s what she hoped.

This time at dinner, she saw to it that she ate enough, but not too much, because she didn’t fancy meeting her dinner again... Dumbledore let them practise alone in his office, claiming important matters to be the reason of his absence. He warned Harry to continue closing his mind to everything but the information that came from Hermione’s. He’d also given the assignment to start trying with a more specific search.

Hermione had had all week to prepare herself for this, and she’d been habituated at clearing her mind before she went to bed for years now. Honestly, how did they think she could sleep all these years worrying about Harry, without having some skill in putting it all aside? So this time instead of clenching all her muscles and being on the defensive, she tried to relax, like she did before she went to sleep.

It did seem to help, and in more ways then one. Though she couldn’t block Harry’s assault, he couldn’t make heads nor tails from all the flashes her mind gave up in rapid succession. He couldn’t control and manipulate his attack like he had been able to the time before. Another nice effect, was that without physically resisting the attack, she didn’t have an enormous headache afterwards.

Harry stayed to wait for Dumbledore’s return, when it was time for her to leave. She managed to get to the Tower, exhausted nonetheless. At least she’d stayed conscious this time. In the empty common room Dobby was waiting for her with a cup of hot chocolate. Grateful for the attention, Hermione thanked him.

“No need to thank me, Miss, Harry Potter told me to bring you this, Miss. Thank Harry Potter, Miss” Dobby seemed to realise something: “Dobby should not have said that, Harry Potter did not give him permission to...” Before Dobby could physically harm himself, Hermione had grabbed him by the neck.

“It’s alright Dobby, I’m sure Harry won’t mind, and he wouldn’t want you to punish yourself, now would he? Tell me, how’s Winky doing?”

Her distraction seemed to work, because the Elf forgot about punishing himself and was very excited: “Well, Winky is doing just fine, Miss. The big professor found her a new family, Miss, and they treat her very good, Miss, and she was so happy, Miss” With a sad expression he continued: “She is still not happy with being paid, Miss, and Dobby is sad about that, Miss. But Dobby has forgotten to thank the Miss! It was Miss who gave Dobby all his hats! Oh, now Dobby is very grateful to Miss. Dobby must do something in return for Miss...”

“Just bring her a hot chocolate every Saturday night, Dobby... That will be more than enough”

Harry had apparently been taking lessons from Dumbledore on how to sneak up on people...

“Harry Potter, sir, Dobby will be very happy to do that, sir. Harry Potter sir needs anything else, sir?”

Harry smiled: “That’s ok, Dobby, you’ve done more then enough”

Beaming the Elf returned from where ever he’d come from in the first place.

Harry chuckled: “Ever since Winky has been asked to go to the Grimmauld Place he’s been begging me for giving him more tasks. I guess we just didn’t appreciate the amount of time he put in concealing Winky’s condition”

Hermione answered coolly: “So the Order is her new family, what makes you think she won’t betray you like Kreacher did? If they’re going to treat her like they did Kreacher, and if someone convinces her that what she’s doing is a disgrace for her old family, why wouldn’t she betray every one...”

Harry looked at her funnily: “I thought you’d be happy for Winky? She still gets paid, and now she doesn’t spend her days drinking anymore. That’s what you wanted isn’t it? And I’m sure they treat her fine, she’s not like Kreacher...”

“No what I wanted, was making everyone aware of the great injustice of enslaving creatures! What I wanted was for wizards to realise that they treated the House-Elves very badly! What I wanted was for Elves to realise that they were enslaved, and that they could be freed, and that it wasn’t a disgrace to want all that! What I wanted was for them to fight for their rights as living beings. What I wanted was to free some of them, so that they experience that it wasn’t a bad thing, and that so, they could tell other Elves and that they’d start to rebel! What I wanted was to be notified by my *friend* when he saw me knitting like a mad woman *knowing* that only Dobby was cleaning our common room and collecting all the clothes, while *I* thought I’d set so many Elves free!”

Hermione was starting to make a habit of stomping off on the stairs to her dormitory.

***

When the next morning Ginny prodded her awake, she was dressed in her Quidditch robes. Hermione realised just how out of it she’d been this year. With all her studying she hadn’t even noticed Gryffindor was playing their first game of the year this weekend. How could she have missed that, it must have been all Ginny, Ron and Harry talked about. Realising that this school year she had perfected her ability of tuning out conversation of Quidditch or any other subject that didn’t involve Voldemort or studying, she hurried to prepare herself.

Ron must be so nervous, it was his first game as captain. She knew Harry had been given his Seeker position back, and Ginny had been granted her wish in becoming a Chaser with Katie. But she had no idea who the third Chaser would be, and if the Beaters had been the same as the ones from last year. She hoped not, and even if they were, she hoped they’d improved a lot since.

When she got downstairs she was shocked to realise Dennis Creevy was wearing Quidditch robes. When had that happened? She was even more shocked when she learned he was a Beater. Andrew Kirke, one of the Beaters from last year, had resigned, and the frail Creevy junior had taken his place. Slytherins were already laughing their asses off. It seemed they’d concealed Dennis had made the team, how they had managed that, she didn’t know, but the Slytherins were having a grand time in discovering who the ‘big secret weapon’ had been. Gryffindor was chanting ‘Weasley is our king’, every time the Slytherins tried to pester Dennis.

Ron seemed nervous but not in the way he’d been last year. It was more of a determined kind of nervous, then a scared kind... Resolve was written all over his face when he was eating his breakfast slowly, the team was just about to leave the table for a last minute pep talk, when Hermione had entered the Great Hall. When they passed her, she offered her support and good luck.

Ron absentmindedly thanked her, and Ginny smiled brightly at her. Harry looked at her in surprise. Annoyed he said: “Good to know you’re not angry anymore...” and now it was him who stomped off.

She felt guilty; Harry had enough on his mind without her adding to it. He was supposed to clear his mind before going to bed, and she’d left him in the common room last night without giving him a chance to respond. He seemed tired, and she hated to believe that even part of it would be her fault.

With a jolt she realised it was against Ravenclaw they were playing. Their team was one of the most skilled at Hogwarts, she couldn’t tell who’d be their new Seeker, but she knew this was going to be a real test of Ron’s ability of captain.

Packing some food in a napkin, she went off to the pitch in order to have a good cheering spot. It wasn’t because she didn’t like *talking* and *hearing* about Quidditch, that she didn’t enjoy watching the matches...

It was already quite cold, and she rapped her scarf tightly around her. Looking at the field, she waited patiently for the game to start. Suddenly she realised that she hadn’t brought any book with her. She forced herself to stay calm; she could study in her dormitory later, while the rest of them had their victory party, hopefully. For now she was going to concentrate solely on the game and her friends.

Starting to enjoy the fresh air and the excited bustle from students picking out a seat to watch the game, she looked at the teacher’s box. McGonagall was of course all ready there, and was speaking with Terry Boot. Realizing that Lee had indeed graduated, the Ravenclaw must be his replacement.

Finally the teams were called and the voice of Terry was naming all members. After the captains shook hands, the game started full force immediately. It was a bit weird to have a commentator partial to the Ravenclaws from now on, but for the rest it was splendid. Ron didn’t seem hesitant any more. Though he still wasn’t able to block *all* the Quaffles from going through the loop, he didn’t let it get to him like last year. The Ravenclaw Chasers were a formidable bunch.

Gryffindor’s Chasers weren’t so bad either, Katie seemed a bit out of her element, but that was to be expected, Hermione supposed; she had been playing with her two best friends for some time and now she had to adjust to two different Chasers... Ginny did well, she seemed to enjoy herself more then when she had been a Seeker. The third Seeker was a third year, Grisabella Green, she seemed good enough, but maybe a little soft. Hermione knew the girl; she wasn’t as bad as Neville at that age, but had a tendency to apologize for everything, even things that weren’t her fault.

Though Hermione wasn’t one for aggressiveness, she didn’t promote weakness either. The girl had obvious potential, she congratulated Ron for recognizing that, but if she just wouldn’t be so afraid of hurting anyone by accident... Playing against the Slytherins would finish her off, unless she learned a little bit more well, carelessness? Dennis on the other hand was violent enough. He surprised everyone with the force and precision of his Bludgers. Jack Sloper had improved since last year; at least he didn’t knock any team-mates of their brooms.

The score was in favour of the Ravenclaws, but not by much. Everything would be decided by the Seekers. Cho’s replacement was no other then Marietta Edgecombe. How the girl had gotten that position was beyond Hermione, the only reason she could see was that the girl possessed a brand new Firebolt. But it was obvious the broom couldn’t make up for the lack of skill.

Though Marietta had no memory of the DA meetings from last year, she seemed to know Hermione had been the one responsible for her facial... well, problem. Once the Slytherins made it a point to avoid contact with the other houses as much as possible, she became Cho’s ringleader in the little ‘popular-girlie-group’. Her facial curse when she’d ratted out the DA had been cured over the summer, and it seemed she had taken advantage of the situation like Hermione had two years ago with getting her teeth smaller. Marietta looked like she’d had a Muggle nose-job done...

Not that Hermione really cared about that. Especially not when she saw Marietta dive in a pantomime of Harry’s daring flying habits. Though Harry was at the other side of the pitch, he came around with so much speed, all other players stopped what they were doing to watch Harry. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Ron, who had just blocked the goal, taking advantage from the lack of attention, and throwing the Quaffle to his sister. Ginny raced to the other side on her new Comet, a present for being made prefect, and surprised the Keeper several times, trying to make the score even.

In the meantime, Marietta was diving full speed to the ground, and she started to worry about the girl being able to pull back in time. She couldn’t see if Harry thought the same, but when the snitch darted off course, neither of the Seekers followed. Marietta was seconds from crashing down, and struggling to pull up her broom. It didn’t look like she was succeeding.

The crowd was looking on in horror, expecting the girl to collide with the ground any moment. In the nick of time, Harry flew by with so much force, knocking her off her broom, on his, just before her broom crashed. Terry was screaming his relief when he saw his Seeker was safe, and thanked Harry before realising Harry was of the opposite team. Swaying because Marietta was fighting to get off, Harry’s broom slowed down enough for Marietta to jump off. She ran back to her own broom, mounting it decidedly. Harry waited for her to be airborne, before he took off too, back in search for the golden snitch.

The rest of the players hadn’t even a chance to put another Quaffle through the loops, and the supporters hadn’t properly start cheering for their respective teams, before Harry was waving triumphantly with the snitch in his hand. Cheers from Gryffindor and Hufflepuff were heard, the Ravenclaws oddly silent, the Slytherins booing like always.

Ron’s song was sung again, declaring him the greatest captain Gryffindor had seen in a long time... The party was going on full swing, but even when Ginny begged her to join, Hermione could not leave the homework she had for later, and stayed in her dormitory, for the first time really sorry that she had taken on so many courses...

***

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