Author's note: I hate Author's notes, first of all but one is needed here. The chapter called-The Rebirthing Party--was bland in the final battle…thanks to Shaz124 for pointing out what I had forgotten to do…use my instincts to make it more driven by HHr's love. Please reread and review…
Breathing, Loving, and Laughing-Chapter 21
"So tell me again, mate, how the bloody hell did you keep from soiling your underwear?" Ron asked laughing.
"Ron, so help me. I don't know." Harry looked at Ron sitting on the sofa with his arm around Luna across from him and Hermione. "Maybe it was just too scary to be scared. Every moment seemed like an hour."
"How many times do I have to listen to this there Wizard Boy?" Hermione tickled him. She knew that with his arm still in the sling, he couldn't fight back. "Not so tough now are ya?" Ron and Luna laughed and gently kissed as they watched their friends wrestle on the common room floor.
"There! See, you're not so tough!" Hermione had wrestled Harry onto his back and was sitting on his stomach.
Harry was laughing so hard he couldn't have fought back if he'd had two arms. All he could see was this grimace on Hermione's face as she used both hands to hold his good one back. It made him laugh more when her hair got in her eyes and she couldn't see. She was breathing a lot harder than he was.
"You need a little exercise, Hermione. I almost got ya with one arm in a sling." He smiled and stuck his tongue out at her.
"Don't stick it out if you don't want to lose it." Hermione smiled at him.
Harry pushed hard with his good arm and got Hermione off-balance enough to slide her down to his thighs. He kissed her lightly and whispered in her ear, "You know my tongue is safe." He kissed her deeply as their tongues danced together.
"Have you two no shame?" Luna cried. "There are first and second years walking around down here." She smiled, but she was serious. He'd been back two days and they seemed to be making up for lost time.
Harry and Hermione blushed. Luna rarely said anything that loudly. Ron looked at her proudly. "That's a girl. Keep those two randy buggers straight."
Hermione stood and helped Harry up. They went and sat back in the chair next to the lamp. "Mom and Dad were surprised that I changed my mind about coming home."
"I'll bet they were since they thought they'd meet Harry." Ron said. "It's funny, I've talked to them loads of times and Harry has only met them in Diagon Alley."
Luna always looked at Ron jealously when he mentioned how close Hermione and he had been before Harry and Hermione. "Can we go somewhere alone?" Luna asked.
"Sure, sweetheart, why? What's wrong?" Ron looked at her and realized what was wrong.
Ron and Luna got up from the couch and started to leave. Ron took her by the hands putting them on his hips. He leaned in and kissed her. "I love you, Luna. I don't know anyone like you because there isn't anyone like you," he said loud enough for only Harry and Hermione to hear. Luna smiled shyly.
"Ditto," she said as she blushed and looked at Harry and Hermione. "Bye, guys, Ronnie and I are off to discuss this in private." Her face turned so red as she said it she looked sunburned. She never said anything like that in public.
She let Ron take her by the hand as they walked out.
"Harry, I'm so glad Luna and Ron are getting along so well." She said. "I don't know what all that was about, but they look cool together."
"I know what it's about." Harry nestled down in the chair pulling Hermione close. "She knows what a spectacular woman you are and Ron used to fancy you. Didn't you see the look on her face when he said he'd met your parents all of those times?"
Hermione looked at Harry and felt sad for a moment. She said, "That makes me sad, Harry. I think about Tonks when I think about people who don't think they are worth a guy's love. Luna is totally different than me. She has things about her that I don't and could never have."
"Like what?" Harry said. He knew he was blindly in love with Hermione so he couldn't see it.
"She doesn't have to see something to believe in it. I think she believed she'd survive when she was taken to the dungeons and it sustained her. She goes hunting Snorkacks and she dreams wonderful things." Hermione said.
Harry understood. She didn't mean better. She meant different. He still had a hard time with the lies that got her out of Hogwarts and Tonks in her place. "Hermione, why did you leave? Did you think I would ever let you be hurt? Did you use your womanly wiles to seduce me just to get me to agree to you staying?"
Hermione looked toward the other side of the common room. She didn't know what to say. She sat quietly for several minutes holding Harry's hand fighting off the urge to cry or pretend that it had nothing to do with it.
Harry sat looking for a reaction. He could sense the uneasiness as her hand grasped his a little tighter every so often.
Finally, Hermione got up and turned around sitting on his knees facing him. She put her hands to his face and gently stroked his cheeks. The tears were obvious, but didn't care. "Yes," she said. "Partially, anyway."
"What do you mean partially?" Harry was neither angry nor happy about her confession. He was confused. "That was the most terrific feeling I have ever had in my life. Not only the sex, the feeling of your body, but the emotion I felt for you then. I didn't want you to leave before that. I wouldn't have sent you if I knew you wanted to be here that bad. But why?" He stammered as he thought. "But why, when we lay naked together as close as any two people on earth, couldn't you tell me the truth? The truth that you wanted me to love your body so much I wouldn't let you go would have been so much easier than thinking you were a stranger to me for weeks and months. I knew something was wrong. It only dawned on me that we'd been together when I thought I was going to die." Harry looked at her with tears in his eyes. She wiped them with her thumbs as she put her hands to his face again.
"I don't know why I didn't tell you that part. We probably would have laughed about that. But I didn't want to tell you something else." She said as she bit her lip and looked at his arm. "Do you think I wanted to have anyone else's baby?" The tears formed so quickly and her throat gulped visibly as she tried to choke the tears back. "Twice, we had sex. Both times we threw caution to the wind. Did you ever wonder why I didn't make a big deal about it?"
Harry looked at her with surprise. "Are you?" he asked. "It would be okay. I love you too much for it not to be okay." He put the back of his hand to the left side of her face, traced her lips with his finger and then caressed the other side.
"I didn't know until yesterday, Harry. When I thought I was sick just because of the excitement of having you back. Yes, Harry. We're going to have a baby." She said with a weak smile. "I was going to go home for just two days while you recovered until I found out. I couldn't face my parents without you though." She buried her face in his chest.
Harry had every emotion a man could have at that moment. He hated that he could have died and never seen his baby. He loved Hermione. He was afraid to leave Hermione alone. He was afraid that he couldn't support them. He was excited at the prospect of holding a little hand in his like his parents had done him. The tears of joy pour from his face as he sniffled. And then, he thought, `What am I worried about? My parents left me a fucking pot of gold at Gringott's.' He gently lifted Hermione's face out of his chest and kissed her. "When are you due? Late September, early October maybe." He kissed her again.
"No, right around the end of October. I have to tell my parents before I go home this summer fat." She said unpleasantly. "Are you still going to be excited about sleeping with a fat, pregnant girlfriend?"
Harry looked at her and said, "Hermione, let's worry about first things first. Okay?"
"What's that supposed to mean?" Hermione asked just as confused as Harry had been.
"No, I don't want to sleep with a fat, pregnant girlfriend." He paused with his evil grin as she stared a hole in him. "I would love to spend the rest of my life with the mother of my child if she were my wife, whether she was fat or not though."
Hermione looked at Harry amazed at the man she loved. She thought, `that wasn't the proposal I'd hoped for, but it'll have to do.' She said, "Do I get a choice in this matter?"
"Sure, you can work out and not get fat or you can get fat. You choose, but you're going to marry me one way or the other. And that's that." Harry looked at her directly in the eyes and smiled at her beautiful face.
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Pappy and Dumbledore sat in the library twisting their beards as Hermione and Harry explained that they were going to be proud parents. They showed no emotion what so ever. Harry had never seen either of them appear so shocked.
Harry leaned over to Hermione and whispered, "You don't think Pompy told them already and they're having us on do you?" Hermione looked at Harry.
Hermione was going to find out. "We were just kidding. I was getting back at Pappy for making us the guinea pigs for his `vision'." Hermione looked spitefully at Pappy. She was still mad, but Harry still couldn't understand why. "So we'll just be going now then."
"Whoa, just a minute there. You can't just tell me you were joking and walk out after giving me an earful. You had better explain better than that." Pappy said.
"They weren't joking Nathaniel. They wanted to see which one of us would break first. And, I guess I'll have to. Pompy told me yesterday, Hermione." Dumbledore admitted.
"What? You two are going to have a baby? At your age?" Pappy said.
"Well, that's what happens when adults play with children's emotions. They try to act like adults. If we were treated like adults, maybe we act like them." Hermione said in a vitriolic tone.
"Hermione, stop giving Pappy a hard time like it was his fault." Harry said. Hermione looked at him with a harsh look.
"Harry, he thought one of us was going to murder the other and then commit suicide. He never told anyone. Doesn't that bother you?" Hermione said. She didn't understand why she was being so emotional.
"Hermione, I can never forgive myself for my selfishness. Albus has read me the riot act a hundred times since we returned." Pappy said sincerely. "I can't make up the time you were apart because of me, but I wish I could. If it makes any difference, I will admit it in front of the other three too."
Hermione was calmer, but she still felt hurt.
"What do you two intend to do?" Dumbledore asked.
"I would like to marry Hermione here on the grounds of Hogwarts, Professor. All the friends I have in the world are here. And since they aren't of age to travel, I could hardly expect them to come to Oxfordshire and explain this to their parents." Harry reasoned.
"Hermione, how will your parents feel about that?" Albus asked.
"They will probably disown me, Professor. They had visions of me becoming something besides a teenage mother." She said sadly. "They won't care."
All three of them looked at her in amazement. Pappy spoke first. "You are naïve to think that your parents don't love you enough to overlook human frailty in their only child. They may be angry and hurt. But they will love you forever."
"Sometimes I think they sent me here because I was weird compared to the other girls my age. They didn't want to be embarrassed." Hermione said as she began her own pity party.
"Hermione, if I could prove you wrong in the next five minutes, would you think differently?" Dumbledore said. Harry looked at him suspiciously.
"Sure, but you can't so don't try." Hermione said.
"Minerva, bring them in. Mr. and Mrs. Granger left early that morning for Diagon Alley and asked for a way to find Hogwarts, because they felt there was something wrong with their daughter. They missed her spring visit after so many others that she'd missed the past few years." Dumbledore explained to a shocked Harry and Hermione. "Hermione, they can't understand why you changed your plans so suddenly. They expected you two days ago."
Hermione was speechless. She understood what Dumbledore just said, but she couldn't speak.
"Hermione, sweetheart." Mr. and Mrs. Granger hugged their daughter and kissed the top of her head.
"Mum, Dad. I'm shocked." Hermione was staggering in her thoughts as she tried to figure out what to say. The she found something to break the ice. "This is my boyfriend, Harry Potter. You see he hurt his arm pretty severely the other day and I just wanted to be here for him." She lied.
"Harry, what a pleasure it is to meet you son," said Mr. Granger.
"Hermione, he's so handsome. You can't tell me you don't have pictures you could have sent." Mrs. Granger said.
Harry felt sad. He could see how the normal muggle lives of her parents were going to be affected by the news. They didn't know about Dark Wizards and spells. They saw movies about it and went home with nothing more than a creepy feeling as they tried to figure out what was real and what wasn't. What was happening to their daughter? Harry could see them asking each other that nearly every day as they missed her. "Mr. and Mrs. Granger, I am very pleased to meet you. Hermione, I love you, but I have things to do and you finally have some time to sit with your parents. I'll be back later," he said as he kissed the top of her head and shook her parent's hands again. At the door he turned and looked at Hermione and said, "Professor Dumbledore and Pappy are right you know. You are wrong." He smiled and walked out.
Harry felt terrible leaving Hermione like that, but it was between them. Whether she decided to tell them about the pregnancy or not, he would support her. He would be there if she wanted when she told them if she chose to wait.
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Several hours later, Minerva McGonagall came into Gryffindor common room looking for Harry. "Harry, Hermione asked me to come get you. The Grangers would like to speak to you."
Harry gulped as he sat up from his daydream of Hermione and him at graduation. He knew that it might all change now. He wasn't sad. He just felt sorry that Hermione might have to give up her dreams of being a Medi-Witch and doctor. He walked slowly behind Professor McGonagall. "Why the long face, Mr. Potter?"
"I am worried for Hermione, Mum." Harry said stoically. "She had such a bright future until we messed up."
"Harry, you of all people should know how unpredictable life can be. You spent the last five years wondering how you'd have the strength to defeat Voldemort. And, the answer was there all along. Your unconditional love for your friends buoyed you at the last moment. Let that be your guide now." She said.
She let Harry in the door and followed him. "Hi, Harry. Come sit with me." Hermione beckoned him with a wave of her hand. When he sat down, she held his hand. "Mum, Dad, after the incredible story we just told you, I have one more bit of news."
Harry looked at her. Somehow over the past few hours she'd regained that resilience that he'd always loved about her. "Harry and I fell in love this past summer. We've loved each other since we met, but never knew how much." Hermione was showing the strain of the emotions welling inside her. Harry squeezed her hand.
"Sir, Mum. Without knowing the story you were told, I have to say that this is the most beautiful person and girl I have ever met. I am guessing that you have heard of the strain our love was under. We made an adult choice using our child-like emotions." Harry was having a hard time too.
"What Harry and I are trying to tell you is that I'm pregnant." Hermione just let it go like a grenade. The effect on the Granger's faces was much different than either Hermione or Harry expected. Her mother looked down with tears in her eyes and her father looked to the ceiling.
The silence was deafening. Hermione started to speak again, but Harry squeezed her hand.
"So, you were afraid to come home because you knew you couldn't lie to us. So you stayed here to avoid telling us." Mrs. Granger said quietly and still in a state of shock.
"You will be seventeen in a few months, Hermione. Your mum and I have always known how independent you are. But at seventeen….," his voice trailed off. "At seventeen you will be a mother."
Another long silence ensued. This time the soft sobbing of Mrs. Granger filled the void. "Harry, we appreciate that you love our daughter, but what could you two have possibly been thinking." She asked as she dried her tears.
Harry looked around the room. They were alone with the Grangers. He'd never noticed anyone leave and neither had Hermione.
"Harry, what are you prepared to do about this?" Mr. Granger asked. "We don't believe in medical or magical abortion, if there is such a thing."
"No, Sir. I want to marry Hermione here at the school after school is out in June. Our friends are here and we'd like your blessing. You may have heard of the tragic death of my parents, but they left me very wealthy. I know I have lots to learn about being a husband and father, but I love Hermione so much that there are no words for the dedication I have to her." Harry took a deep breath as he finished.
"And, where will you live?" Mr. Granger asked.
"Sir, this was the first step. Your blessing will allow us to plan that far ahead." Harry stopped for a moment. "I don't mean to sound arrogant Mr. Granger, but I believe our love is as strong as any love has ever been. I am sure you and Mrs. Granger felt the same way. But two days ago, I knew it was my love for Hermione that kept me alive. There was no other force or power at work, but her love for me and my love for her." He pulled out his pocket watch. "Do you remember when she bought this in Oxfordshire last summer? I carried it to hell and back, Sir. I will never let her go. You can take her, but I will find her." Harry's tears were pouring down his face. "Sir, it may not be appropriate for me to cry or show weakness. But this is not weakness. This is the strength of my love for Hermione." He stopped and kissed Hermione's hand as he hung his head for a second, wiped the tears from his eyes, and then looked Mr. Granger directly in the eye the same way he had as when he spoke.
Hermione smiled and looked at Harry. She looked back at her father. "That's why I love him, Dad. He feels the fear of everything. Loneliness, pain, and suffering the loss of his friends, but he will face it and fight. He won't give up on me or our dreams." She held Harry's hand and caressed it.
Mr. Granger sighed deeply. "Professor Dumbledore warned us that there was a very serious issue that we need to face with you two. We didn't have time to think of what it might be. We're shocked and sad that it happened this way. Yet, I have met many young people in my business Harry. Not many of them have ever struck me as being as direct, trustworthy and fearless as you. Whether that is a good thing or not, I don't know."
Mrs. Granger sat silently looking at her husband. She looked at Hermione and Harry. "Hermione, I just see you as the little ten year old girl that finished your school in Oxfordshire six years ago. I took you to school everyday. I have seen you for less than a year total as you've grown up into such a beautiful young woman. I expected to have you come home next year in June with a boyfriend or plans for college, but not with your own baby." She laughed uneasily as she wiped her nose.
"Mum, where are you and Dad staying?" Hermione asked.
"We're going home, sweetheart. I can see that you two are determined to make things work. I know that your mother will follow my lead, because of the respect she has for Harry. She won't say it, just as I can't welcome you to the family right now. We will come to terms with this in our own time. Right now, we'd like to speak to Professor Dumbledore again before we leave." Hermione and Harry realized that they were being dismissed.
Hermione walked over and kissed her mother and father. Mr. Granger stood and walked over to Harry. "Harry, you are a brave young man. You must be a good person or my daughter would not have anything to do with you if you weren't."
Mr. Granger paused looked at his wife as she nodded. He continued. "You have our permission to marry Hermione, because there are stronger forces at work here than I have ever seen. You were wrong though. We knew we loved each other, Mrs. Granger and I. But you two have faced more together in the last six years than we have in our whole lives combined." He shook his hand. "We will welcome you formerly when we can get our hearts to understand what our brains do now. For now, figure out your plan."
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