Author's note: I haven't updated this story in over a year but I had a chance to reread it the other night and thought that it would be ashame not to finish it. I hope you all enjoy this new chapter and I will try to follow up with more soon. I do want to complete this story since I had outlined the entire thing over two years ago and thanks to all of you who have read it.
***New Note*** I updated this chapter to fix the inconsistency with Ron and the Canons. I guess I missed that detail when I went back to browse over previous chapters. Thanks to the readers who pointed that out!
Chapter 10- To Love Somebody...
The weeks leading up to the double wedding flew by. On Valentine's Day a soft blanket of snow draped the hilltop where the Remus and Athena and Sirius and Rosmerta would recite their vows. The gorgeous white landscape painted a perfect backdrop for the occasion.
The ceremony had gone off without a hitch. Sirius had everyone in stitches with his hilarious yet sweet tribute to his bride, and there wasn't a dry eye left in the house when Remus read the vows that he had prepared for Athena. Harry was so happy for both couples and only wished that his parents could have been there to see their best friends find such happiness.
Ron had owled earlier in the week to inform Harry that he would be unable to attend the ceremony because he had managed to get a big tournament against Puddlemere United in order to make the conference Championships. Harry had written back to wish his friend luck and let him know that Sirius and Remus also wished him the best and knew better than anyone that you had to follow your heart.
Just about everyone else from their Hogwarts days had shown up for the event. Dumbledore had a fair share of Fire Whiskey and he and Hagrid spent much of the reception dancing quite badly to the sounds of the Weird Sisters. Dobby and his house elf crew insisted on catering and preparing the event and did a fine job with the arrangement and the foods. Professor McGonagle and even Snape arrived to wish the happy couples well. There was just one person missing, and that one person was enough to make Harry feel alone in a room full of people.
Disappointed by Hermione's abscence, Harry left the reception tent quietly, and took a stroll back to the hilltop where the ceremony had taken place.
"Looking for someone?"
Harry smiled as the voice called out from behind him. He knew exactly who it was before he even turned around.
"Hermione...." he exclaimed in awe as he caught his first glimpse of her.
She was absolutely breathtaking. Her hair was straightened and fell a few inches below her shoulders. She wore a simple, yet stunning black fitted tube dress that ended just above her knee. She was wearing very little makeup, and yet she was the most gorgeous thing he had ever seen. It felt like his heart had stopped beating and then began pounding all in the same moment. There were no words to describe what he was feeling, but he knew he'd never need a pensieve to remember every aspect of it.
"I am speechless..." He said as he swallowed a large lump that had developed in his throat.
"Should I take that as a compliment?" She asked nervously as she ran her hands over the sides of her dress.
"Absolutely." He grinned devilishly. "I've never seen someone look so beautiful."
"Harry..." Hermione replied as her face became beet red.
"I'd almost given up on you."
"Sorry I was hiding out in the back during the ceremony.....I was looking out for you and Ron and trying to make our meeting as easy as possible, but I didn't see him..."
"He couldn't come, has a big match tonight that could put the Canons in the Championship. He stopped by earlier this morning and told me to send you his best."
"The Championship!" Hermione exclaimed joyously. "That's so wonderful for him, I am sure he will do just great!"
"Me too..." Harry smiled as he nervously searched for more words to continue the awkward conversation with,, "I can't believe how fast this day came."
"I know, it seems like just yesterday you owled to tell me about the wedding and now the reception is winding down and I haven't even danced yet." Hermione winked.
"Are you implying that you would like to dance with me, Miss Granger?"
"It's the least we could share, Harry."
"The *very* least," he said with a grin. "May I have this dance?"
Hermione smile as she wrapped one arm around Harry's neck and took his hand with the other.
"I'd be honored.." Hermione replied as the two slowly began to sway in rhythm to the echoes of a song playing in the distance at the reception.
There's a light
A certain kind of light
That never shone on me
I want my life to be
Lived with you, lived with you
There's a way
Everybody say
To do each and every little thing
But what does it bring?
If I ain't got you, ain't got...
"It's a little unsettling..." Harry whispered as he moved his hand to brush a loose tendril of hair from Hermione's face.
"What is?" She asked curiously.
"How fitting this song is..."
You don't know what it's like
Baby, you don't know what it's like
To love somebody, to love somebody
The way I love you
"How did we get to this point, Harry? How did it get so complicated?" Hermione sighed as she rested her head on Harry's shoulder.
"Puberty?" He quipped as he pulled away to look at her. "It isn't *my* fault you had to develop into such a beautiful witch."
"I'm not joking..."
"Neither am I...."
And with that reply, Harry softly caressed Hermione's cheek as he leaned down and kissed her as tears slowly poured down her angst filled face.
In my brain
I see your face again
I know my frame of mind
You ain't got to be so blind
And I'm blind, so very blind
The kiss was tender at first, and then grew with desperation and longing. Hermione had wanted to pull away. She knew because of the pact what they were doing was wrong, but the moment just felt so right. After a few moments of an inner battle between mind and heart, Hermione finally broke away from Harry.
"Please don't pull away, Hermione." Harry pleaded as tears began to form in his own eyes, I need you."
"I can't.." She wept as she shook her head and turned her back to him, "If we don't stop now, we are going to regret this later.."
"No!" Harry cried out as he grabbed her shoulder and turned her towards him, placing his hands on either side of her face. "I promise you that if you stay with me tonight, you will *not* regret what happens."
And once again, he pulled her to his lips and kissed her with a passion she had never felt before.
I'm a man
Can't you see what I am?
I live and breathe for you
But what good does it do
If I ain't got you, ain't got you
"Stop it, Harry, please....I am begging you. Don't make this harder on me.." Hermione sobbed as she pulled away once more.
"Dammit! Why does this have to be hard? Why do we need to wait five bloody years when I know you want this as much as I do. I love you, Hermione, and you love me, I know you do!"
You don't know what it's like
Baby, you don't know what it's like
To love somebody, to love somebody
The way I love you
"I do love you!" She screamed as tears continued to pour down her anguished face, "I love you more than you could ever know, but if you love me as you say you do, you will give me this time."
"Why? Why are you torturing me, Hermione?" Harry screamed through his own tears, "Why are you torturing myself! I know you never loved him the way you love me, so why are you delaying the inevitable? What in bloody hell can he give you that I can't?"
Hermione trembled as she turned to look him in the eye and give her response.
"Stability."
Oh yeah
You don't know what it's like
Baby you don't know what it's like
To love somebody, to love somebody
To love somebody oh yeah
Harry froze as the pain of her answer sunk in. He watched as she folded her arms across her chest, shivering and crying. She was frightened. Not because she didn't want him, but because he couldn't offer her any certainty. His life had been one unending ride of danger and it terrified the woman he loved more than life itself. He knew then that Hermione had not chosen to wait five years because she was torn between him and Ron, but because she was torn between love and security. Harry silently cursed himself for being born as the Boy Who Lived, a title and life that was a double edged sword. He had saved so many, but lost so much. Up until now he had been able to cope with it, but knowing that he could never give Hermione what she needed was almost too much to bear.
"Go Hermione..." He sobbed as wrapped his arms around her waist and placed a tender kiss on her forehead. "I can't give you what you need right now, but I can give you time."
"Harry I'm sor-"
"Shhh," he interrupted her and shook his head, "It's okay....just go."
Hermione nodded and placed one last soft kiss upon his lips before turning away and disapparating into the night.
Harry stared at the spot where she had stood just a few moments earlier and continued to cry. She was able to give him everything, but the one thing he couldn't offer was the one thing that she needed most. Hermione put on a brave front, but she was scared, and he couldn't bear hurting her with the unpredictability that came with his existence. He was going to find a way to give her what she needed no matter what price he would have to pay.
To love somebody
The way I love you
You don't know, you don't know
To love somebody, to love somebody
You don't know, ooh
To love somebody, to love somebody
The way I love you