A/N Okay, I got some new ideas…don't know if they're any good so I'll put them to public opinion… ;)
If You Love Me, You'll Understand Me
Chapter 1
"I love him Harry," She leant back into his chest. Just feeling her against his sweater was heaven enough but hearing her declaring her love for someone else was…heartbreaking.
"How do you know?" He'd tried. "I mean, it could just be a crush or something…"
She'd sat up now and was adjusting her hair, tied back as always. "No, I know."
"But Herm…"
"Listen Harry. When you fall in love with someone, you don't just leave it at that. You tell them."
"Hermione, I love you."
She sighed. "You don't love me, Harry."
"Yes I do," he persisted, giving his every heartfelt word into it. "I do love you. I can't remember a time when I didn't…"
She'd pressed a finger to his lips. "Harry, I love Ron."
Harry felt his stomach knot. "But I love you Herm. I love you and I can take care of you, I can love you…I
can understand you…"
"And that makes you a great best friend," She interrupted. "But I just don't feel the same about you."
He felt defeated. "Platonic, never anything else." He sighed. "Ron isn't right for you Herm…"
"Then who is?" She protested frustrated. "Who the damn hell is Harry?"
She got up and walked to the fireplace.
"Me. I'm right for you Herm. Please…just give me a chance."
He put his hand on her shoulder. She kept her back to him.
"Harry…I love Ron…and you can't change that."
She could feel the tears brimming in her eyes.
"You don't love him…I love you."
She turned sharply to face him, tears streaming down her perfect cheeks.
"If you love me then you'll understand me, Harry."
Then it came.
"But if you can't accept that I love Ron…then you'll never understand me."
She walked as fast as she could, up to her bedroom, leaving Harry in the cold common room alone.
~)*(~
And there he stood, staring into the sunset watching the brilliant flashes of red and orange mixing with yellow and the dark purple clouds.
The words were haunting him. Each time he closed his eyes he thought of Hermione, those words and her tears.
He'd never brought her to tears before, but she'd provoked him to say it; to declare it.
She couldn't love Ron. It wasn't right, it wasn't meant to happen.
There he was, on the roof of the Astronomy Tower, away from everyone, away from Hermione and Ron.
His solitude was his friend. Hermione wasn't going to talk to him anytime soon and he'd be damned if he were going to say sorry for it.
He felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning only brought him face to face with Ron.
"She's angry at you," he stated plainly. "What did you do?"
Harry shook his head. "If she didn't tell you, then I can't."
They stood there for a moment, savouring the special connection between two friends.
"She said you had an argument," Ron moved next to Harry, looking out at the colours so far away at the edge of the sky. "She didn't say what about, but she doesn't want to see you for a while."
"If she didn't tell you," Harry closed his eyes. "Then there's no point in me telling
you."
Ron contemplated it for a moment. "Whatever. You're both mad at each other. What did you say to
her?"
"We argued, that's all you need to know," Harry replied, opening his eyes only to look into the dark distance.
"Hey, best friend alert!" Ron waved his arms around. "You're my best mate, your problems are my
problems."
Harry sighed. Ron wouldn't give up, Harry knew he wouldn't. Hermione would tell Ron eventually anyway.
"I'm your problem, Ron," Harry looked at his best friend, at present looking somewhat confused. "Do you really need me to explain it?"
Ron nodded. "How can you be my problem?"
Harry turned away from Ron, not wanting to see his reaction. "You love Hermione."
"I do," Ron nodded, still confused, wondering where this was going.
Harry breathed out. "So do I."
Ron felt a stab, a stab of betrayal. "Oh."
Harry let out a nervous laugh. "Is that it?"
Ron gulped. "How…why?"
"If I only knew…" Harry sat down on the floor, resting his back against the surrounding wall.
"How long?" Ron sat down next to him, apprehensive at first but this was Harry after all.
"Few months maybe, a couple of years," Harry rested his head in his hands, propped up his elbows on his knees. "I can't remember when I didn't."
"Why Hermione?" Ron said this in an almost inaudible whimper. He was getting upset but agitated.
"I'm not going through the list," Harry laughed once, a breathed out laugh.
"You could have any girl in school Harry, why mine?" Ron wanted to rip his guts to shreds, tear every likeable limb from his backstabbing, girlfriend snatching body.
"I don't know Ron!" Harry shouted standing up. "If I knew, I'd stop. But I don't know!"
Ron stood, matching Harry in size. "You lay a finger on her…"
"I wouldn't ever act on it, Ron," Harry felt tears. Not only because his best friend was threatening him but also over the girl he loved.
"You did tonight! You told her!"
"I had to! I had to tell her, I had to tell someone; if it was her all the better. At least she knows!"
"She knows she can't trust her best friend anymore!"
Harry stopped. The anger, the hate, the frustration, the love, the pain, the anguish, the heartache…flooded out of him as the guilt, the friendship and the care rose.
"She…she can't trust me?" He asked, tears now free-falling down his cheeks. "She said
that?"
"Yes, Harry! She bloody well can't trust you! She said that she'd told you something very personal and
that you threw it back at her. She thought she could trust you."
"I'm sorry, Ron…I'm so sorry," Harry wiped his eyes with his robe sleeve.
Ron smiled apologetically and placed an affectionate hand on his back. "It's alright mate. No harm done, to me anyway."
Harry laughed, sending a wave of relief through him. At least one of his friends was talking to him.
"Thanks Ron."
"It's okay," Ron assured and walked towards the door. "Stop blubbering like a girl and think about it. See you later."
Ron closed the door tightly behind him, leaving Harry alone again looking out to the distant sky.
Harry wasn't sure how he'd got to bed. He remembered waking up in bed and looking up at the four poster bed's material canopy.
Thousands of thoughts flooded through him. He thought about Hermione. How did she feel now? Could he ever take it back? Would she accept him as her friend when she knew what he felt? Would everything be different now? Would they be as close as before?
After several hours of pacing his bedroom back and fourth, he decided that the best way of stopping his emotion was by showing none at all…to Hermione anyway. He'd apologise first, but then he'd be void of any, staying away from her when he could.
Irrational thinking…
But he'd make it work, until the end of school anyway.
Graduation was only a week away. Next Friday he'd be away from Hogwarts for the rest of his life…until he became the DADA teacher of course.
An Auror maybe, he'd have to study the dark arts in University first, furthering his education. They'd have to accept him if he excelled in the dark arts.
He'd send of the application letter tomorrow, the deadline wasn't for another week, plenty of time to approve entry.
After all the thinking, he settled back into bed, his mind decided on his next course of action.
Apologise.
AN Like it? Hate it? Please let me know!!