A/N: Ok, this story is a bit AU because Hermione's parents are divorced, but I just wanted to keep adding ingredients for complications. *Evil grin* Please enjoy the chaos that ensues before a wedding.
Also, brides-to-be, be forewarned, this story won't be far from reality when planning a wedding. Unfortunately, that's experience speaking.
Disclaimer: Nothing Harry Potter belongs to me. Otherwise, the bills would be a lot easier to pay!!
***
As I glance across the table and see my stepmother, Emily Granger, and Mrs. Weasley chattering away excitedly, I want to pound my head against said table. Why exactly did these things have to be so bloody complicated?
Maybe I should clarify. I, Hermione Granger, have been engaged to Harry Potter now for a mere 2 days and already my parents and the Weasleys had taken over. I thought this was supposed to be mine and Harry's wedding.
Well, apparently not.
I have just been informed that I have to go to three different bridal stores immediately, if not sooner.
"Wouldn't one be good enough?" I ask.
Apparently that was a stupid question considering the laughs that have erupted across the table.
"Hermione! Of course not! We need to find you the perfect dress!" my stepmother announces.
"Ok, but I know exactly what I want, so shopping around might not be too necessary. I mean, I don't want anything too extravagant or gaudy," I tell them. "I'm not a princess or anything."
"Oh, but dear! You are marrying a prince!" Molly says.
"Yes, while that's true, he is my prince, I don't think we need to throw an actual royal wedding. It's just Harry and I."
"Well, there are going to be certain expectations of this wedding, dear," my stepmum says. "Even being a Muggle, I can tell the importance that Harry has in the wizarding world. Plus, he's pretty wealthy, right?. People are going to insist on a big wedding."
"But it's not their wedding!" I whine. "This is my wedding! I don't care what everyone else insists!"
"Yes, dear, we know," Molly says, while patronizingly patting my arm. "Now, Emily, what kind of flowers are you thinking?"
And as if I wasn't even in the room, my stepmother replied, "Well, I was thinking roses, but with Harry's mum's name being Lily, wouldn't that be nice too?"
"Well, Harry and I discussed that and -"
"Oh, that would be lovely!" Molly replies (interrupting me without a thought to what I was trying to say). "What a touching tribute!"
"Well, I thought maybe I could just carry some dandelions that I'll pick myself. Or perhaps something really off the wall. Maybe I'll carry a chicken down the aisle," I say, in the hopes of actually catching some attention.
"Well, that would be lovely, Hermione," my stepmum says absently. "Now, Molly, for the cake …"
I stood up at this point.
"Hello! Remember me? The bride-to-be?"
"Yes, honey, of course we remember you," my stepmum says.
"Well, that's good. I was beginning to think that you two were planning me out of this event. And besides, Harry and I have only been engaged for two days! This kind of stuff can really wait … can't … it?"
Ok, if I could even begin to describe the looks of disbelief on these women's faces, I would. But I honestly can't. It appears that they're both in shock and may need medical attention.
"What? What did I say?"
"Hermione! This can't wait! We'll need all the time we can get!" my stepmum tells me.
"We haven't even set a date yet! What if we're waiting 10 years? That's enough time."
"Honey, do you really think you and Harry would wait 10 years?" Molly asks.
"No, but that's not the point. I just want to get married. I don't need a room filled with material for a wedding gown, I don't want a wedding cake that sings, I don't need enough flowers to send my cousin into a pollen-induced allergy breakdown and I don't need to release 100 magically trained doves after the ceremony."
"Doves! I never even thought of that!" my stepmum yells. "Molly, is there a way to make the doves magically fly in a heart shape?"
What have I gotten myself into?
"Listen, you two have fun. I'm going to see Harry. You fill me in about my wedding later, ok?"
"Ok, dear," my stepmum says as I leave.
Now that I am out of the kitchen, I lean against the doorframe. I can't believe that this is happening already. Two days and the piranhas are already biting. I can't blame them though. I mean, I am my stepmother's only "daughter." And Harry is like a son to Molly and who knows when Ginny will actually get married, so they naturally are clinging to the idea of a wedding. I just wish they would let me interject.
I know they will eventually. They just need to get this out of their system, right?
Before I can think of the answer, I Apparate to the flat I share with Harry and Ron. Soon it'll just be the two of us though, since Ron and Luna are moving in together soon.
He's just sitting down to read the paper when I surprise him.
"Hermione! What are you doing here?" he asks.
"Seeking refuge," I reply.
"From?"
"Molly and Em. I just want this to be our wedding and already it's not."
"Just talk to them. I'm sure they will understand," he says in that rational tone that always put me back with reality. He stands up, walks over to me and holds both of my hands in his.
"I will. When I can get a word in edgewise. They weren't even listening to me. I can only hope that once the newness wears off, it'll be better."
"They're just excited."
"Don't they think I am, too?" I ask, slightly exasperated at it all.
"Of course they do. But come on, do you think Ginny will settle down any time soon? Not with the way she's been dating lately. And it's not like Emily has any other children to fawn over. They just want to throw their little girl a beautiful wedding," Harry says while pulling me into a hug.
"I hope it will be."
"It has to be," Harry says before pressing a kiss to my forehead. "You'll be there."
I blush slightly. As much as Harry loves to compliment me, I'll never get used to being called beautiful.
"Well, now that you're home, want to get a movie?" Harry asks.
"I'd actually rather just hide under the bed until it's time to get married," I say, not willing to quit whining just yet.
"Honey, don't worry so much. This will get better, I promise."
"I'm good at worrying. It's what I do."
"Don't I know it," he mutters, knowing full well that I can hear him.
"Harry!"
"Mione, you know I love you. Worries and all."
"And some days I don't know why," I admit to him.
"Do we have to go over this again?"
"No. I know the answer already. You explain it to me every single chance you get. I just don't understand it."
"The one thing Hermione Granger doesn't understand and I have to spend the rest of my life explaining it to her," he mumbles.
I stick my tongue out at him and wander into the kitchen. I need something to drink. Unfortunately, we don't have anything strong enough for my needs, so a soothing glass of milk will have to do.
"Mione! Put down the hard stuff! It's not worth it!" Harry teases from the doorway.
"No, I plan to get completely pissed on this stuff! Go away and let me drown my sorrows in peace! I have troubles and I need to forget about all of them," I say as I collapse onto the nearest chair.
He laughs as he sits next to me.
"Ok, how bad was it, really?"
"Worse than I expected. I have to go to three bridal shops as soon as possible. I didn't even bother to ask if these were Muggle or magical stores. I don't even want to know how bad it'll be in a magical bridal salon. Molly is picking out the lilies I'll carry down the aisle and Em is trying to pick out the doves to release, hoping that they'll fly in formation. Harry, we don't even have a date picked yet!"
"Lilies, huh? That would be nice, don't you think? I mean, a nice tribute to my Mum," Harry says with that grin that always gets me. "Would the entire place be full of them, or just your bouquet?"
"Oh, don't tell me that you're jumping on the bandwagon, too!" I say as I bury my face in my hands.
"No, of course not. I'm just trying to get you to smile. Remember how you used to do that before we told Molly and Em that we were getting married? Before Hurricane Matrimony began blowing."
"I remember. I remember."
"Ok then, let's go back to those times. We're not engaged anymore. In fact, we're not even an official couple. We're just Harry and Hermione, like back in Hogwarts. We're off to have another death-defying adventure. What do you think? Trolls? Nah, been there. Dementors? No, done that. I know! Power-hungry, evil, self-titled Lords? Damn, done that too."
I smile. He does know how to bring me out of a funk.
"I don't want to go back that far anyway. I never want to think of the times that we weren't together," I tell him.
"Ok, so it's after 6th year," he says.
"And after 7th, thank you very much," I add. "Let's get past the power-hungry psychopath, as well."
"Fair enough. So, let's say it's around the present time, we're still engaged and we've got nothing to do all day."
"Except run from our surrogate mothers?" I ask hopefully.
"That works."
"I love them both, really, I do. But you should have seen them! It was like they were Ron and this wedding was a 7 course meal! It was almost scary!"
"Well, like we said. The novelty will wear off and they'll become a little less…"
"Possessed by a wedding demon?" I offer.
"I was going to say 'wound-up,' but that will do too. Ok, so, it's a beautiful Saturday. There's no class to teach, no books to put away, so what will we do with our time?"
"Let's take a walk. It always used to clear my head back at school."
"Do you want to go to Hogwarts? We can walk around the lake," Harry suggests.
"Do you want to go there? I mean, it's our day off."
"Mione, it doesn't matter where I go, as long as you are with me."
There he goes again, making me forget that I'm in a mood.
"Then the lake sounds wonderful."
"Good, because I just happen to know of a very nice secret passage we could use via one haunted shack."
"Oh Harry, you sure do know how to sweep a girl off of her feet!" I said as I swooned a bit.
"I know it! All this charm, how can you stand it?"
I smack him playfully on the arm and we leave to have our walk. Somehow, I know with him by my side, I'll be able to face the wedding crazed mothers.