Grffyndor Common Room
When Hermione got back to the common room that night, all the lights were off. `Everyone must already be in bed,' she thought. It surprised her that no one was up, but she was glad for the most part. She really didn't feel like dealing with anyone right now. All she wanted to do was take a shower, and then maybe cry herself to sleep. Normally, she would never allow such an option to even cross her mind, but it'd been an all around shitty evening and she was tired. In fact, she's had a shitty couple of weeks. Not only had her so called plan to move on gone straight to hell, but Harry was going to know that he was right and would probably never let her live it down. The worst part is that she knew he was right when he confronted her tonight, and every other time too. Hell, she knew what Ernie was all about well before he even asked her out. Of course she had to be stubborn though, and now she's gonna pay for it. `Why the hell did I chose Ernie of all people,' she thought to herself.
You were upset that Harry didn't feel the same way about you, and you knew that going out with Ernie would really stick it to him
"Shut up," she told herself.
When Ernie had asked her if she wanted to have lunch with him on the first day of school, Hermione was all ready to turn him down like she had been doing for the past two years. She never wanted anything to do with him. She knew that the only reason he kept asking her out was because she always said no. It was a game to him, to try and win her like some prize. Plus she knew he loved to get under Harry's skin, being the captain of an opposing team. Harry knew all of this too, so when he saw Ernie talking to her that day, he came over and told him to get lost before Hermione had a chance to say a word. She was grateful, even though she could have handled it easily by herself.
Then, out of nowhere, Cho walked right up to them and started putting her hands all over Harry. Hermione didn't even give Harry time to react. Something inside of her snapped and she decided then and there that she couldn't just stand by and watch him be with someone else. She told Ernie she'd love to join him, and walked away without even looking back. `He probably didn't even care,' she thought. `And even if he did, I'm sure Cho got his mind off me real fast.' She stopped thinking for a moment and sighed deeply.
`We haven't even had a real conversation since that day,' her thoughts continued. `Every time he tried to talk to me I just got so angry with him, and all he was trying to do was help. I was angry with myself, not him. I sure as hell took it out on him though. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't want anything to do with me for a while.'
She paused her thoughts again and wandered aimlessly through the common room, before depositing herself on the couch. On the table in front of her was an old copy of the Hogwarts Herald. Hermione picked it up and stared at the picture on the front page. It was of her and Harry on the Hogwarts Express. Colin had come into their compartment, and asked if he could take their picture. Harry normally tells him no, but he was in a really good mood that day and agreed.
Hermione remembers how special she felt when he put his arms around her while Colin got into position. He took the picture, and the next thing they knew, it was on the front of the school newspaper and they spent days trying to convince everyone that they weren't a couple.
She would never forget that day though, or their summer together.
"I miss him so much," she whispered, but wouldn't let herself cry.
The only thing that brought her any comfort was knowing that she got that asshole Ernie good tonight. Earlier this evening, as she and Ernie were walking through the corridors, he leaned towards her and made another pathetic, and not to mention grotesque, attempt to get her into his bed, or rather a broom closet. Now she's put up with a lot of crap from rude guys who thought they were kings of the universe, but when he grabbed her ass after making his comments, she'd had enough. She dropped him right there. `He's probably still trying to catch his breath' she suddenly thought as she began to climb the stairs to her room. She couldn't help but smirk at the idea.
Her smile faded quickly, however, as she reached the top of the stairs, thinking of Harry again and realizing that she would never find anyone that meant more to her. No matter how frustrating and annoying he could be at times, he was always…always there when it mattered. Ready to fight for and defend her without even needing a reason why. Sometimes it makes her angry that he's always trying to protect her. Like he thinks that she can't take care of herself. Deep down she knows that's not the reason he does it though. It's ingrained in his blood to keep the people he cares about safe, and she loves being one of those people. Being loved by him, even if it's always been limited to her role as best friend and confidant, has been the most amazing, free, and unconditional love she has ever felt in her life. His capacity to love astounds her, and the crazy part is that she knows for a fact that a large part of him is still so closed off, even to her. The girl…the very lucky girl that can find her way into the deepest part of his heart is going to be in for one hell of a life. `She better never hurt him though, or she'll have to deal with me,' Hermione thought protectively.
That was the last thing that went through her head before opening her bedroom door to find him standing in the middle of her room. The only light in the room came from the moon shining through the window behind him. Her eyes locked onto his immediately and she couldn't tear herself away. Her heart was pounding so loud again that she couldn't hear the voice in her head telling her not to let him get to her again. He looked like an angel…her angel…backed by the moonlight. She was so overwhelmed by the moment that she couldn't even say anything.
Harry took a tentative step towards Hermione when he saw her enter the room and brought his hand up to her face. She froze under his warm touch and unconsciously closed her eyes, shedding tears that she didn't even know were there.
When Harry saw that she was crying it scared him because it was something that she rarely did, at least not in front of anyone. He's seen her cry just a few times in his life, and even then it was only in front of him and for very good reasons. In that moment, he was glad that she still trusted him enough to let go like this, but afraid because he didn't know what was upsetting her. Without even thinking about it, he ran his thumb across her cheek to remove one of her tears.
That action brought Hermione out of her dream-like state, however, and she tore away from his touch like it burned her.
"What the hell are you doing in here?" she demanded.
Harry noticed that they were standing in the same position they had been in earlier in the evening. He was standing by the door with her turned away. Accept this time he wasn't going to let her leave, and he certainly wasn't going anywhere until he finally told her how he felt. Ignoring her question, Harry asked his own.
"Why are you crying?" he said softly
"You care," she stated harshly.
"Of course I ca…" he began, before being interrupted by her angry words.
"OF COURSE, OF COURSE, OF COURSE… Is that your answer for everything?" she screamed, but refused to turn around.
Her outburst caused Harry to hesitate for a second, but he wasn't going to give up.
"Hermione, I…" he tried again, but before he could say anything she turned so they were facing each other again. Her beautiful eyes were definitely full of anger now, and not tears.
"Are you happy?" she asked bitterly
She continued before he could answer the question, however.
"What! Did you already find out what happened tonight? Did someone tell you? Maybe Lavender or Cho, or another one of those complete airheads that throws herself at you shamelessly, and tries to cater to the every whim of the great Harry Potter" she finished dramatically.
She thought she saw him wince at her words, and that she may have hurt him, but she continued anyway.
"Well I'll just say it ok. I know it's why you're here waiting for me. You were right, ok. You were right. You want to hear it one more time? You were right, right, right. But I have a news flash for you mister perfect. I knew Ernie was a jerk before I even went out with him. I knew his game and everything he was saying about me long before you tried to tell me about it," she screamed, and stopped for a moment to look him directly in the eyes before saying, "And I knew that all Ernie wanted to do was get me into bed, and I didn't care."
If she thought she'd hurt him before, she knew that she did now. When she said that, he took a step back and looked like he'd taken a physical blow to the stomach.
"Did you…" he started to ask the question, but stopped realizing that as much as he wanted to know the answer, he didn't. Not to mention that it was technically none of his business.
"Did I what, Harry?" she asked. "Did I sleep with him?" She laughed suddenly. "Do you really want to know?" she asked vindictively, taking a step closer to him. "All the little details, huh?"
She took another challenging step towards him, but he moved back away from her and unconsciously towards the door. Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing. There's no way what she's saying is true. He knows her. She wouldn't do that, would she? Suddenly, he wasn't so sure and his determination was lost. He knew that he had to get out of her room or he would choke on his own breath.
As he turned quickly to leave, Hermione caught a glimpse of the look in his eyes, and it shook her to the core. She hasn't seen that look on his face in a long time. In fact, she's done everything she could to protect him and keep that look out of his eyes since she's met him, and here she was becoming the cause of it. She couldn't let him leave hurt because she mislead him.
"Harry, no wait… I didn't," she said hurriedly. He turned around at those words and she could see that he was fighting to keep his composure. "I didn't," she said again to reassure him, making sure she had eye contact. "That's never what I wanted."
Harry let a long breath out between his lips and moved back into the room towards Hermione. He was clearly relieved by her admission. "Then why did you go out with him?" he questioned, moving even closer.
"It's not important." she replied, breaking away from his eyes.
"It's important to me," he said and closed the gap between them again.
This time she didn't move away, but instead lowered her head and began to cry again. Seeing this killed Harry. He feels like all he's been doing lately is hurt the person that means the most to him, so he took her face in both his hands and did the only thing he could think of. He was terrified that she would push him away again, but she didn't this time. Using his hand to wipe away the tears that had fallen on one of her cheeks, he brought his other hand up to stroke the length of her hair, down the side of her body and back again. Then he slowly brought his lips down to her face and kissed away every tear that fell from her eyes from that moment on. They stood like that in the middle of her room for a long time. He thought his actions might be upsetting her more because she just continued to cry and kept her eyes closed, but she didn't move away and he didn't want to stop.
As he continued to comfort her, like he always had and she knew he always would, she lost all resolve to be mad at him. She loved him. That realization, coupled with the tenderness he was showing, caused her to cry like she hadn't since her parents told her that they no longer loved each other. Only this time, all the tears didn't come from sadness.
"I hate this," she finally whispered a little breathlessly.
At her words, Harry stopped kissing her and moved backed slightly so that they were standing with their foreheads together. His lips were so close to hers that she could feel every breath he took, and it was driving her crazy.
"Hate what?" he asked with fear in his voice.
She took a moment to collect herself and then answered, "Fighting with you. The one person that I've never felt like I had to pretend around, or defend myself to. The only person that has ever accepted me all the way, good and bad." Harry wanted to kiss her so bad in that moment and prove that he was still that person, but she continued. "I hate looking into your eyes and not knowing what your thinking or how your feeling." She was totally out of breath at this point. Hermione was clearly exhausted, but Harry couldn't let this opportunity slip away.
"You're not looking into my eyes right now," he stated, noticing that she still hadn't opened them since she started to cry again.
"I know" she replied simply, but her eyes remained closed. She knew that if she opened them now and looked into those deep green eyes, the ones she dreams about, she would lose herself to him forever, and she wasn't sure if she could do that yet.
Before she knew it, however, his breath moved away from her lips and he began to gently kiss each of her eyelids, begging her silently she knew to just look at him.
When Harry felt her relenting, he shifted so that her eyes met directly with his the moment she opened them. Their foreheads were once again together and their lips barley separated, every breath intermingling.
"Hi," he said, slightly above a whisper. He thought it sounded stupid to say at first, but then he realized it was appropriate. He felt like he was staring into those beautiful brown eyes for the first time again. Besides, he was so caught up in her that his brain couldn't process much more than that anyway. He stood there silently for a while committing every detail of her face and this moment to memory.
Hermione suddenly broke the quiet when she said, "You know if you plan on saying `I told you so,' I'll drop you quicker and harder than I did Ernie tonight." They looked into each other's eyes for a moment and then burst into laughter. It felt really good to them both.
"I wouldn't dream of it," he replied with the grin she's grown to love. "Besides, that's not why I was waiting for you," he said more seriously.
"Then why?" she asked with a mixture of fear and anticipation.
He looked away almost shyly for a second and then reached into his pocket to pull out the remote to her CD player that he had been keeping. Eventually, he returned his eyes to hers, gave a small shrug of his shoulders, and said simply, "I wanted to dance with you." Then Harry turned on the song he had programmed into her system earlier. It was Selena's "Dreaming of You." He knew that it was one of her favorite muggle songs, not to mention completely fitting for how he was feeling tonight.
She stared at him in utter disbelief as he placed one hand at the small her back to keep her body close and pulled her arm around his neck to keep their foreheads together and their eyes locked. His other hand took hers and massaged it, lovingly locking and unlocking his grasp as he interlaced his fingers with hers. They danced slowly for a few moments. Not really moving that much, just swaying back and forth and holding each other.
Hermione eventually moved a little closer and brought her face to the side of his, so that her lips were at his ear.
"You hate dancing…" she whispered softly.
Harry closed his eyes completely marveled at the shock she could send through his body just by feeling her breath on his ear.
"…but you love it," he finished tenderly.
Those words silenced all her doubts and she rapped both arms around him, never wanting to let go again. The song eventually ended, but that didn't faze either of them. They just continued to hold each other and enjoy every new feeling they were experiencing together.
"I'm sorry," Harry whispered back to her, breaking the comfortable quiet.
"For what?" Hermione questioned confused.
"That it took my head so long to catch up with my heart," he said sincerely. He could feel her smile against his neck and knew that he was forgiven. She didn't have to say a word.
Finally, Harry took a determined breath and stood back only a few centimeters to hold her face in his hands again. `Ok, this is it,' he told himself. He looked her deep in the eyes and was ready to confess what his heart had known for most of his life. For some reason, he didn't have any trouble saying it this time.
"I love you, Hermione Granger," he breathed right against her lips.
Hermione felt a little lightheaded when she finally heard him say those words, but was able to collect herself just enough to respond whole-heartedly.
"I love you more, Harry Potter," she said with a smile in her voice.
"Not possible," he challenged.
"Ok," she relented.
"Did you just let me win our first fight, beautiful?" he asked, pretending to be shocked.
She couldn't help but grin, knowing it would be the first of many fights to come as a couple. She also knew that they would work through every one and grow closer in the process.
"Yeah, but don't get used to it babe," she quipped, finding it hard to concentrate with him standing so close.
"Ok" he mumbled before finally closing the miniscule distance between them and kissing her amazing lips. The kiss was slow, and gentle, and perfect. He continued to kiss her softly for several minutes. Small, sweet, and almost innocent kisses. Eventually, he settled his lower lip in between hers to begin sucking on her top lip, while stroking her cheek with his thumb. For a while, Hermione didn't really respond that much. She was just enjoying his touch and letting him take the first steps. When she started to return the kiss, however, it was with as much vigor as Harry was expressing. She finally caught his lower lip and happily gave him as much attention as she was receiving.
The kiss remained so heart achingly slow that it made them both weak in the knees, but, at the same time, it grew deeper and more passionate with each passing minute. Harry let his tongue slip through her lips at the first opportunity she allowed, and began to gently massage her tongue with his. Hermione let his hands travel down the sides of her body, to graze every curve and then come to rest on her hips. She was beginning to feel lightheaded from his actions. Nothing and no one had ever made her feel this way before. Hermione knew in those moments that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him and if he didn't want to stop, she wouldn't ask him to.
He eventually did stop, however, completely out of breath. Hermione took this opportunity to move lower and suck tenderly on his on his neck and the sensitive spot behind his right ear. She could feel his breath quicken and loved the effect that she was having on him.
Harry knew that if they didn't stop soon things could get out of control, so he moved himself just out of her lips reach to look into her eyes.
"We have the rest of our lives," he stated matter-of-factly, as if it was always a given that they would spend those lives together. Maybe it was. Nothing else needed to be said. They know they have the time and the desire to build a stronger relationship, and to create a deeper bond than the one they already share. And after that, they'll have a lifetime together to make love.
"Can I keep you," she whispered already knowing the answer.
He grinned, "I'm standing here until you make me move."
"How does forever sound?" she asked.
"Perfect," he replied.
He then closed the physical gap between them again, closing any emotional gaps that had been created right along with it. He knew that he loved her more than anything else in this world, and that she felt the same. Nothing else mattered anymore.
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