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Lily by Secret Lily
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Lily

Secret Lily

Summary: Lily Evans is not the sort of girl who would normally be found writing in a diary. Yet, when she starts, she finds that the easiest way to overcome all the obstacles in life is to let her emotions out onto paper.

Lily

Chapter 6-Curiosity About the Cat

Woe is me, diary. Yes, I am throwing myself a dignified pity party, thank you very much. If anyone deserves sympathy at the present time, it's me. The hell I've had to endure, the torture, the suffering. And well, that's only detention. I suppose life in general's been pretty disappointing as well.

I find that talking to a one-eyed cat and a one-eyed cat alone can probably be considered unhealthy, as well as socially awkward. Yet, Jules is the only company I have outside of classes and detention.

Holly attempted to patch things up with me, but I, Lily, always the stubborn one, merely brushed her off. I can't say it was ridiculously uncalled for, but it would have been easier to share my woes with an actual human being opposed to a cat.

Woes indeed. It seems that Severus Snape actually is as demented as the Marauders make them out to be. He spends the entire detention drawing really disturbing images that I can't even understand half of the time. One time, he caught me staring and actually hissed at me. Yes, hissed! I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to be embarrassed or confused. Let me tell you, I was a little bit of both. Actually, no, I wasn't really embarrassed at all. Mainly just confused.

Plus, he seems to be enjoying this 'glory' he's received from being associated with both my lips and the Hall Brawl. In the halls, he always makes a point of curling up his lips when I pass or brushing by me in the classroom. It's enough to make me want to vomit. Snape? Severus Snape? Even if he was a nice person, well, he's extremely whacked, if you ask me. You just don't go around hissing at people.

I mean, it's only common manners not to. When you're young, your parents establish the basic principles that guide you through life. Manners, right and wrong, birds and the bees, etc.

Now, I don't really know how Snape's family conducts the do's and don't list, but well, I imagine it must look like this judging from poor Severus' behavior.

Do

Draw creepy, demented drawing AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE!

Kill innocent insects without any guilt whatsoever (I mean, come on! Even if they are disgusting and annoying, a little pity here and there wouldn't be frowned upon)

Pretend to be Lily Evans' boyfriend despite the fact that she wouldn't be caught dead snogging anyone with such horrible manners.

Hiss at attractive red headed fourth year girls

Don't

Hold respect for hygiene. Clean the grime, commit a crime.

Hm, I haven't really gotten to know him so I don't actually know much about the 'Don't' part of the list. Severus Snape seems oddly fascinating, even if he is an ignorant git.

Yet, Snape I can handle. Snape is quiet, minds his own business, and divulges himself into those creepy drawings. I really would prefer being in a room with ten thousand Severus Snape's opposed to one James Potter.

I never knew Potter could be so bloody annoying! I always thought he was rude and superficial, but I never expected him to be so irritating. Well, actually, yes I did. Strike that.

What I meant to say was that because he's so popular, I never imagined he'd be so unlikable. I could be a brick wall and yet, Potter would still find a medium topic of conversation.

"So, what's it like being a brick wall? Must be pretty boring, huh? What do you do all day?"

Merlin, the boy's questions are endless. It's "Evans" this and "Evans" that. He knows we have detention every night, yet he deliberately comes empty handed. Both Snape and I always brings a notebook with us. Not Potter. Nope, he insists upon bugging me.

Questions I've Been Asked By James Potter

Pt. One

001. What's your middle name?

002. Do you have any pets?

003. Really? One eye? That's weird. How'd that happen?

004. You don't know? Aren't you ever curious?

005. You can't just tell someone that and expect them not to be inquisitive. I mean, does the one eye give your cat problems? Can she still go on with her daily life?

006. No, Evans, it was not that obvious. Why do you always have such a chip on your shoulder?

At this point, I believe we'd had exactly two minutes and twenty three seconds of silence before the questions continued, sometimes without me even having to answer.

007. Evans, you ever wonder what it's like to walk on the moon?

008. What is gravity in your opinion?

009. Did you know Sirius has a star named after him?

010. Have you ever gotten heart burn? It's really uncomfortable and well, I think that everyone should be made aware of it.

011. Does the one eye bother Holly? Does it bother you?

He just wouldn't shut up about the eye. He wants to meet my cat now. James Potter wants to meet my physically handicapped cat. No way in bloody hell is that ever going to happen. Laughable.

As if I'd ever let anyone as balmy as Potter near my perfectly normal cat, Jules. Alright, well, she's not exactly sane, but that's another story entirely. And you know what fascinated him even more than the eye thing (which he brought up at least another twelve times before the night was through)? Her nightmares.

"What, are you some kind of cat fiend, Potter?" I inquired as we made to leave the door. I heard Snape snort, an unusual sound effect for him. Hissing must have become overplayed.

"No," he insisted sullenly. "Can't a guy just be curious."

"No, Potter," I told him harshly. "A guy can. A normal, perfectly sane guy can. But you, Potter? You always seem to have an ulterior motive to everything. Going to blackmail me anytime soon? Hold my cat for ransom? What? What are you going to try and pull this time?"

He stared at me, as if seeing me somewhat differently now, and shrugged angrily. "You just don't get it, Evans," he told me.

Get what? How am I supposed to get it if he doesn't explain himself? He is not an open book, despite however much he believes he is.

I'm starting to think there's something seriously wrong with him. First the questions and now the stares. And not only in detention either. He stares at me in class. It's really weird. I mean, maybe I'm paranoid, but I feel like at any moment, he's going to spring some humiliating prank that will further prove my point regarding his despicability.

It's because of him that the entire school thinks I go have my way with Snape each night and that I have frequent rage black outs. Furthermore, it is his fault that Holly and I are no longer on proper speaking terms. If he hadn't started that blasted rumor to begin with, Holly would more than likely be criticizing the fact that I didn't straighten my hair this morning.

I miss her and I know I'm being stubborn about it, even though I still hold all the blame on Potter. I can't just give up my pride though. Too much of my dignity has been stolen and laughed at by the student body of Hogwarts. I no longer have a squeaky clean reputation. I'm tarnished. Bruised. Broken. Lonely.

And even more so, I'm thoroughly annoyed with everyone. Everyone except Jules. Bless her and her one eye.

I really wish I wasn't so stubborn. Bah.

Let me wallow,

Lily

A/N: Not great, but certainly not horrible. I mean, I've written better. I do hope that you all liked it, however. Please review.