Disclaimer: If HP & company belonged to me, they wouldn't be in children's books. ;)
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN:
After her initial panic, Hermione was able to levitate Harry's prone form into the library. His body landed with a soft thud on the wide couch. He didn't even stir.
She removed his glasses, accio'd a blanket and covered him with it. When he was settled, she found herself staring at the thick frayed cloth clinging to his arm. A touch of her wand unshackled it from his wrist. She picked it up, suppressing a shiver of revulsion, and set it aside.
Then she curled into a nearby armchair and waited. It won't be long, she thought.
Unfortunately, she was right. Within the hour, she heard the unmistakable creak of the front door swinging open.
"Harry? Hermione?" In a fit of déjà vu, Lupin strode into the library again, only this time he appeared much worse for wear.
By the time he spotted her, Hermione was on her feet. "Not one step closer," she warned, standing between him and Harry, her wand pointed at the newcomer. Of course it would be Lupin. She had activated the locks, bolts and wards that protected Grimmauld, but none of those were likely to stop the former professor, who had probably helped Sirius to set them up in the first place.
The thin wizard raised his hands. "Hermione, I'm not going to hurt him." His eyes flitted quickly to the unconscious youth. "I don't know what he told you, but it's not what you think."
"No?" With her free hand she threw the ripped band of cloth at him. "Then explain this."
He caught it, and turned it over in his hands. Guilt etched itself on his weary face. "We couldn't restrain him any other way. There was no telling how an active binding spell cast directly on Harry might react to the antidote."
"So you tied him down?!" Hermione's voice rose.
"We didn't have a choice. The group discovered that the Solvamus reacts violently to the antidote - that's why we changed the arrangements," Lupin explained. "The Solvamus has been in Harry for so long, we couldn't take the risk. We had to secure him. If everything had worked out, he wouldn't even have known. We gave him a sleeping draught first, then waited until we were sure that it wouldn't interfere with the antidote."
"Did it work?" The question slipped out before Hermione could stop herself.
"We were able to administer the antidote," was all the wizard could give her, "but we're not sure. Faveure was going to cast a spell his master designed to gauge the success of the antidote. The spell is supposed to be cast the morning after the potion's given, giving the antidote enough time to work. I would guess by the manner that Harry broke away, though, that the Solvamus is still trying to fight it off. Oh Hermione, you should've seen him," Lupin said, with still a trace of astonishment in his voice. "He was wandless and bound, but it didn't make a difference! The bindings tore like they were paper. Then he blocked our stun spells and simply ran past the wards."
Hermione had guessed as much, but having Lupin confirm it ... Harry, what's happening to you? Then something else occurred to her. Was it the Solvamus that had broken their connection, wrenched the real Harry away from her dream? "So what now?"
"We wait. Honestly, there's no need for this." He gestured wearily at her raised wand. "Surely if I meant to take Harry by force, the whole Order would be waiting outside by now."
"And risk a magical showdown in the middle of muggle London? Which would be as good as an announcement to Voldemort that Harry is here? Because that's what it would take, Professor." The witch flicked her wand towards the sleeping youth. "I could wake Harry in an instant. We might not last long against such old and wise men," she said wryly, "but between the two of us, believe me there would be a lot of noise."
Her forcefulness startled Lupin. Suddenly, he realized how seriously he was regarded as a threat. "Hermione, I'm not the enemy! I swear to you I'm on Harry's side. What we did, how we did it, maybe that was a mistake," he admitted slowly, "but I came here out of concern for you and Harry. The others who helped with the potion are nearby, but if you wish, I'll send them away right now. We can watch over Harry together."
The girl could hardly believe her ears. "You're asking us to trust you? After everything?"
"Yes," Lupin replied simply. When she still looked doubtful, he continued, "Hermione, before he ran out, Harry looked back at me. It was just for a moment, but ... except for the day I stood by as Sirius was arrested for Pettigrew's crimes, I've never seen such hurt and disappointment in anyone's eyes. I can't have Harry thinking I betrayed him," he said. "You must believe me when I say that I never meant Harry harm. I could never do that to James and Lily's son."
The last phrase seemed to sway her. Hermione hesitantly lowered her wand. "One chance, Professor," she acceded, "but it's not up to me alone. You'll have to convince Harry too, when he wakes. And no more secrets," the brown-haired witch declared. "Like it or not, we're in the middle of this war and we can't operate blind." She looked at him, and allowed her own disappointment to show through. "It would really help if we could concentrate on fighting Voldemort and curing Harry, without having to watch our backs around you and the Order."
The former teacher winced inwardly but tried to keep his face impassive, merely nodding his agreement. "Then the first thing you should know is that Faveure found his master's notes on the Solvamus. That's how we found out about its adverse reaction to the antidote, and the spell." He grimaced. "Unfortunately, only former students can read the notebook, and it's protected by a cipher, magical of course. The process of decoding has been slow, but at least we might have some answers now."
Yes, please! Hermione could barely contain the anticipation that surged through her. There were too many unknowns in Harry's condition, and just that fact alone had been driving her spare. She turned towards Harry. Please be okay.
Lupin came alongside her. "I could take first watch," he offered tentatively.
As he expected, Hermione shook her head. "Maybe it would be better if I took all the watches for now. If Harry wakes and sees you, he might not understand."
"Of course," the wizard sighed. "I'll owl the others, tell them that Harry's asleep but that he seems to be alright. Will you call me when he's ready?"
The girl nodded. Then, curling up in the armchair, she took up her post once more.
=============
In hindsight, Hermione should've expected what happened next. After all, she'd had precious little respite since her return to Grimmauld. The last nap she'd taken had hardly been restful. Before she realized it, sleep stole over her.
She wasn't sure afterwards what woke her - a noise, maybe, or some movement. All she knew was that when she opened her eyes, Harry was sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of her.
He was watching her intently.
She rubbed her eyes, still bleary with sleep. Maybe that's why the first words that came out of her mouth were, "Who are you?" Which one are you?
The boy drew back, as if stung. He didn't pretend not to understand her. "You tell me."
Hermione slowly uncurled from the chair until her feet were planted on the floor, her legs between Harry and her. "Do you remember what happened?" she asked gently.
His face grew dark. "Not everything. But I remember waking and finding out that I was tied down."
She winced. "I'm sorry, Harry. I shouldn't have let you go alone."
The youth shook his head. "No sorries, and no blame," he said lightly, "except where it belongs." He reached out and touched the back of her hand gingerly. "I'm just glad to be back."
She smiled wanly. "You did promise."
He met her eyes. "I will always keep my promises to you, Hermione. As much as I can, anyway."
In the end she was the one who looked away from his somber green gaze. "I heard about what happened, how you got away."
"You have?" He frowned at her. "But how could you -"
"Lupin's here," she revealed gently.
"What?!" He got up and spun to his feet, as if expecting the older wizard to appear behind him.
Hermione stood up, too. "He arrived after you. He's alone," she said, trying to calm her friend.
"His mistake," Harry hissed.
"He admits that he has - made a mistake, I mean."
"Bleeding generous of him," he scoffed. He glanced at her. "Hermione, don't tell me you still trust him?" He sounded outraged.
"I'm not sure," she answered honestly. "I said he could have a chance, but I also said he would have to convince you. That's all, Harry," she said lightly, holding her hands out to calm him. "Just listen to what Lupin has to say. He says they've found some notes on your condition, that there's a spell that could tell us if the Solvamus is gone. If you don't believe him, we can always chuck him out together."
The earnest way she said it, and the mental image of the two of them (specially prefect-Hermione!) "chucking" their former professor out of Grimmauld tugged Harry's lips into a reluctant smile. "It's my call?" he clarified.
"Absolutely."
He looked down, his brow furrowed in thought. "I guess that's alright then," he said after awhile.
Hermione released a breath she hadn't been aware of holding. "I'll call him ... unless you want to rest first? How do you want to do this?"
The boy took a few steps back and sank into the couch. "Can I just stay here for awhile? I'm absolutely knackered."
"Of course," she nodded. "Do you want something to eat, drink?"
Harry shook his head and closed his eyes. He slouched back, letting his head loll back against the rear of the couch. "Stay with me?"
She hesitated for no more than a second, but he noticed.
"Hermione," he chided, "I don't have the energy to try anything."
A little embarrassed, the witch sat down next to him. In seconds, he was asleep again.
===========
In the end, it was Harry who sought Lupin out. Not that he'd meant to.
He woke up, and it was morning, and he was alone on the couch. He grabbed a bite and a quick shower before going off to find Hermione. Only it was the professor he stumbled into first.
The wizards traded ambivalent gazes.
Then Lupin was moving across the hall. "I'm sorry," he said quietly.
The apology was so unexpected, so surprising, that Harry found himself responding bluntly. "You should've told me. I would've done it anyway. I wanted this out of me as badly as any of you."
"I believe you. I'm sorry, Harry," Lupin repeated, meaning it. In hindsight, he could only guess how much his actions had hurt the boy. As much as he treated Harry like a favorite nephew or a much younger brother, he knew that the teenager also held Sirius and him in high regard. They had been his father's closest friends. Only Lupin remained of that circle now that Sirius was dead.
The boy's expression remained stony. "I told Hermione I'd listen, so go ahead."
"She told you that Faveure found his teacher's notes?" At Harry's nod, Lupin continued. "The longer a person is dosed with the Solvamus, the more his body resists the attempts to remove it. It makes sense, because why else were Aurors sent to apprehend the wizards who took it? Not medi-wizards, not healers from St. Mungo's, but full-fledged Aurors," he stressed. "Harry, we didn't want to hurt you, but there was little time to come up with an alternative."
"But I never said I wouldn't take it!" Harry tried to remember exactly how he'd felt. "I resisted to leaving Hermione behind, but I wanted the antidote."
"I know," the older wizard nodded. "You even insisted on taking it right away. Which is unusual ... but your body's responses might not have been so cooperative. I couldn't take the risk, not with just -" He stopped abruptly.
"Not with just you and Hermione," Harry filled in, his eyes narrowing. "Is that why you did it? You were afraid I'd hurt her?"
"We were more concerned that the potion wouldn't work," was the frank reply, "but Hermione was right, we should've told you our concerns. You're not children anymore, not when it comes to Voldemort. And Hermione might've come up with a better idea than yesterday's catastrophe."
Harry's lips curved as he made a swift guess. "Gave you an earful, did she?"
"Every word as incisive as a cutting knife," the former teacher admitted in a wry tone. "You should've seen her, standing with her wand out between the two of us. She can be quite scary, your Hermione."
"You don't know the half of it." The boy found himself grinning. Hermione had torn his and Ron's attention from a pack of veelas once with nothing but a few short, annoyed words. Imagine what she could do if she was really mad. Having Lupin refer to Hermione as "his" didn't hurt, either. "She can be very ... strong-minded."
"I don't doubt it."
The smile faded as Harry made his decision. "I guess I understand, Professor," he finally said, "since you did it partly to keep Hermione safe. But I don't want to return to that place, and I won't let myself be poked and prodded by a bunch of strange wizards. The spell can be cast here. I have to know if I'm cured."
"You can't tell?" Lupin asked curiously. "How do you feel?"
"I don't know," the boy replied honestly. "Something feels different, but ..." He shrugged, unable to put the feeling into words.
"Faveure owled me a copy of the spell last night. I've been studying it," Lupin revealed. He hesitated. "It would require that you be placed in a deep sleep."
Harry's response was immediate. "Can Hermione do it?"
The former teacher tried to keep his disappointment from showing. "Why don't we show it to her and see?"
===========
In the end, they decided to have Lupin cast the spell while Hermione stood by.
The spell was fairly simple and the preliminaries were quickly done with. Which was why Hermione experienced a sinking feeling when Lupin repeated a particular step, not just once but thrice. The older wizard obviously didn't like what he was seeing and wanted to be certain of the results.
Somehow Hermione found the courage to speak. "It's still in him, isn't it?"
Lupin never got to answer. Just as he turned to reply, a bolt of blue lightning erupted from Harry and hit the older man square in the chest, hurtling him against a wall.
Hermione ran forward and drew her wand. She watched, horrified, as an invisible force began to contort her friend's body. "Harry!"
Even in his unconscious state, Harry cried out as his body slowly bent into a bow that curved several inches off the bed. Soon only the crown of his head and the soles of his feet were touching the sheets.
From the corner of her eye, the witch spotted Lupin staggering upright. "Professor, what's happening?!"
"It must be the Solvamus. It's resisting the antidote!" The wizard gritted his teeth as he tried to ignore the ache in his ribs. He thought of the possibilities he'd been discussing with Faveure over the last two days. "We need a healer!"
"And leave Harry like this?" the girl objected as the crackling blue wire of energy sparked again. This time it wrapped itself around the boy's bowed form like a giant snake, squeezing tightly as it went along.
"We don't have a choice!" Lupin returned. "Neither of us has the training to deal with this. I think the Solvamus is trying to protect itself by burrowing deeper into Harry's psyche. Only a trained healer can go into another's mind. I've got to go to St. Mungo's!"
"Wait!" Hermione shivered as Harry screamed again. "Let me try! I - I think I can do something, but I need your help. To do this, I've got to be unconscious."
"What?!"
"Find a healer," she agreed, "but stun me first! Harry and I have been meeting in my dreams, Professor. He was with me when you gave him the antidote. That means that Harry found, or created, a link between our minds. If I can find that link, I can follow it back to him."
"But Hermione -"
The witch ignored his remonstration and carefully laid her wand aside. "Professor, we're losing him! I can't just stand here and wait, and hope you return before Harry loses his mind and his life. If I'm right -"
"If you're wrong, we'll lose you both!"
"That's a risk I'm willing to take." She met the older man's eyes. "If you don't help me, I swear by Merlin I'll find a way to do it myself!"
"Alright!" Lupin did not need to be told how much more dangerous it would be if Hermione tried it alone. Anyone traveling the mindscape had to be as focused and centered as possible. He raised his wand. "I'll be back as quickly as I can, I promise."
She smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you, Professor." Carefully, slowly, she reached through the crackling nimbus surrounding Harry and grasped his hand.
"Stupefy," Lupin intoned, just hard enough to knock the girl out. "Levicorpus!" he followed quickly, so that Hermione's body would not hit the floor. The witch floated next to Harry, her hand firmly twined with his.
Then, as fast as possible, Lupin ran out of Grimmauld towards the nearest apparation spot.
============
Sometimes, Hermione thought, one ended up doing the stupidest things for one's friends.
This was definitely one of those times.
The brown-haired girl had to try twice before she stumbled to her feet. She felt weak and cold and ... Best not to dwell on that, she scolded herself, as she took stock of her surroundings.
Hogwarts again. Then she stared up at the swaying mass of green before her, and swore. Harry knew what she was here, and he had brought her to the maze.
When he was finally able to talk about Cedric Diggory, Harry had described the maze to Ron and her. It was worse than the lake, he had told them. The lake was just strange territory, an environment that you could die in because it wasn't something you were adapted to. The maze was like a living thing and somehow, Harry had said, you knew that it hated you. It pressed in and drove you, and changed whenever it felt like you were getting somewhere. The first thing it tried to take away was hope.
If Hermione had any doubts that this was going to be vastly different from the times Harry and she had met before, the maze erased them. It was as clear a warning as she was going to get. This wasn't safe territory; this wasn't anything like her dreams. This time she was the one entering Harry's subconscious, and this Harry was still under the influence of the Solvamus. This wasn't even like the pensieve, where she'd been merely an onlooker and from which she could pull out in an instant.
Another glance at the swaying twisted walls, and Hermione's instincts were screaming at her. The maze was dangerous. At the very least, the delay would cost too much time. Her lips thinned. It was a game she wasn't going to play.
"Harry! I know you can hear me!" she yelled. "We don't have time for this! I've come to you. At least face me!"
Her shout rang out like a challenge. And if there was one thing a Gryffindor couldn't resist ...
There it was. An orb the size of a fist floated through the nearest entrance to the maze. It danced before the girl, and something about the way it weaved in and out seemed to taunt her. If a blinking ball of light could smirk, then that's what this particular orb was doing.
Hermione frowned. The bright blue ball wasn't just a guide; it was Harry issuing his own dare. He sensed that she didn't like the maze. He wanted to see if she would go through it anyway.
But at least this way, he was guaranteeing that it wouldn't be a lost cause. Hermione had no doubt that the orb would lead her to Harry. With that thought, she entered the maze.
It was an experience the young witch could've done without. As Harry had warned, the maze pressed in around her. The towering hedges moved restlessly, sometimes closing behind her, at other times parting to reveal new winding paths to her front and sides. Without the orb guiding her, the girl knew that she would've been hopelessly lost.
And then the orb suddenly hurtled and flew into a leafy wall.
Hermione froze as the point of light glimmered, and then disappeared through the leafy interweaving branches. Around her, the hedges ominously fell still.
The Gryffindor prefect took a deep breath and prayed she was right. Resolutely, she stepped into the green hedge ...
... and found herself in the Gryffindor common room. It was fall or winter, judging by the size of the fire blazing in the stone fireplace. And Harry was standing there in his vest, tie and trousers, looking for all the world like he was going to class.
The first words out of his mouth were, "Go away, Hermione."
"Harry ..."
"It didn't work."
"We don't know that!" she denied. "Lupin wasn't able to say what he found before you -"
"I think the fact that I'm ... in the state that I'm in speaks for itself," he said. His eyes were bleak. "It took me away from you. I can't even come to you anymore."
Hermione's eyes widened in understanding. "The maze?"
"Bars me from going anywhere," Harry replied bitterly.
So she'd been wrong. The maze wasn't meant for her, it was Harry's prison. That she'd gotten through it, though, didn't that mean something? "But ... apparently I can still come to you."
Harry shook his head. "It's not the same. I'm not the same here. I don't even know if I'm in control or not."
"Then you know what you have to do," she said resolutely. "You must wake, Harry! That's the only way you can fight this."
"Why?" he asked. "So it can take me away again? Maybe it's best this way. At least if anyone suffers, it's only me."
She looked at him in disbelief. "You can't honestly think that."
"Hermione," he said wearily, "you've made it plain it's your friend you want. Well I'm not him."
Was that what he really thought? That he could only return to her fully cured or not at all? It wasn't that simple. Nothing about this situation between Harry and her was simple. When she had protected him from Lupin earlier, the question of whether he was cured or not wasn't even a consideration.
"If you stay here," Hermione replied softly, "you never will be. If you give up now, I will lose him - you forever, and that? That would really hurt." Her voice quivered as the very real possibility of losing Harry swept through her. How long did they have now? Would she lose him today? "That would be unbearable."
The sheer force of emotion from the normally taciturn witch shook the boy, made him waver. "Hermione ..."
"Don't ask me to give you up, Harry," she continued in a whisper made hoarse by unshed tears. "I can't. Don't ever ask me that."
He took a tentative step towards her, and she felt his hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry," he murmured back to her. "I'm so sorry."
She threw her arms around his neck, exactly the way she used to, and his arms came up to steady her. They held each other as the long days and nights of waiting and hoping and losing finally took their toll in a long stream of mingled tears and sobs and muffled apologies. They were still so young, and it just wasn't fair that even this one thing, their certainty that a future - if there was a future - would hold each other, even this simple thing was now threatened. Snatch one of them away, and the circle that had sustained them for more than six years would be broken forever.
Eventually they quieted down. They parted slowly, their hands clasped loosely, still reluctant to completely let go.
"I think," Hermione said softly, "that to go back we need to pass through the maze." It wasn't an idea supported by any semblance of logic; somehow she just knew.
"Lead the way," Harry agreed, squeezing her right hand reassuringly before letting go.
They walked together, hand in hand as they had done many times before. Harry hesitated just before they reached the portrait door. Hermione glanced at him curiously.
He cleared his throat. "Hermione? If we get through this, would you ... would you go out with me?"
The girl's eyes widened. They were about to step into the unknown and he was asking her out on a date?! Harry Potter and his amazing sense of timing, she thought wryly. Then she looked at the door, and thought of the maze and the uncertainties that lay ahead. "If we get through this and your condition permits it, yes."
Harry nodded and smiled at her, one of his rare, genuine smiles that lit up his eyes. With something like that to look forward to, no mere maze was going to stop him. With a glint in his eye and a determined gait to his step, he led Hermione through the portrait hole.
A/N: First, thanks to everyone who reviewed, and offered words of encouragement! I have to admit that I was sorely tempted to take a break (because, honestly, I didn't think I could do a good job of writing "Biding" in my current state), but after seeing all those reviews, I thought I'd try and see what I could come up with first. This is the result. Take a look and tell me what you think.
Second, along with the readers whose names I've gotten familiar with, it seems that "Biding" has acquired a few new readers (some of whom actually reviewed each and every chapter - thanks!). Welcome, and I hope you continue to enjoy the story! I can't tell you how thrilled I am that people like "Biding" well enough to recommend it. :D