Unofficial Portkey Archive

Thank you reviewers! I love you all! *author sends out love*

And Rylee! I love you too! *author sends love to her wonderful beta*

Enjoy this chapter! I'm sorry it took so long, but I wanted to get it just right for your reading pleasure. :)

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Without You

Chapter 9: Blowin' In The Wind

Bob Dylan

How many roads must a man walk down
Before you call him a man?
Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand?
Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannon balls fly
Before they're forever banned?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind,
The answer is blowin' in the wind.

How many years can a mountain exist
Before it's washed to the sea?
Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free?
Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head,
Pretending he just doesn't see?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind,
The answer is blowin' in the wind.

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"Unghhhhhhhh," Ron moaned as he slumped out of his room that morning, rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hands. "How long have you two been up?"

Hermione swallowed the bit of apple she had been chewing on. "Since ten. You overslept by three hours."

Ron moaned again and plopped himself down in one of the chairs that surrounded the magnificent feast the house elves had brought up to them. Grabbing for a bagel, he watched as Harry fed Hermione pieces of apple, and rolled his eyes at Hermione's giggling when Harry would purposely miss her mouth and run the food into her nose, her cheek, her chin…

"You two are disgustingly happy," Ron grumbled as he shoved a piece of a bagel into his mouth. "Too happy this time of morning. I'm going back to my room." Harry chuckled as Ron loaded his arms up with food and drug himself back to his own room.

"I'll see you two in a bit when its time to go back to that smelly old library," Ron shouted through the door. This made Harry and Hermione blush deeply.

Hermione looked over to Harry and brushed her hand atop his. "About last night…"

"You're not regretting it, are you?" Harry asked with a bit of disappointment in his voice.

"Oh, no! Not at all." Harry grinned smugly. "I just…well I wanted to thank-you."

Harry's eyebrows rose. "Me? You want to thank me?" He shook his head with a hearty chuckle. "Hermione, I should be thanking you, that was…incredible."

She grinned. "Well, I have learned a few things over the years."

Harry's forehead wrinkled as he pressed his eyes shut. "I really don't want to know the details."

Hermione giggled and moulded her body into his. "I wasn't planning on it. I've entirely forgotten about him after last night." That little comment lifted Harry's ego tremendously and he kissed the top of her head.

"Forgotten…everything?"

Hermione sat back a bit and looked up at him amusedly. "Absolutely."

Harry beamed widely and leaned forward to place a kiss on her forehead. "Good, because I plan to make you forget your own name tonight." Hermione gasped as he thrust his tongue into her mouth, crashing with hers as he moved his hands up to knot themselves in her hair and pulled her head closer to his.

"Oy, get off him, Hermione." Ron said from his doorway with a smirk that was quite amused with the situation in front of him. Harry and Hermione flew apart. "Harry's got to save his energy for this little scavenger hunt Voldemort's got us going on. I'll wait outside while you get yourselves under control." Harry let out the breath he had been holding in and Hermione was still breathing hard when they heard Ron close the door.

Hermione was the first to speak. "I-I'm going to go brush my teeth. I'll meet you outside in a minute." She flitted away and Harry ran his hand through his hair, trying to smooth it out. Reasoning it probably looked the same as always, Harry got up and walked out of the Room of Requirements, ready for a few minutes of awkwardness between him and Ron.

His best mate, however, was leaning against the railing nonchalantly with his hands crossed over his chest and a smirk on his face that made him look like Draco Malfoy. "So," Ron started. "Things heating up I see?"

If it was possible for the blood to pump faster to Harry's face, he would have looked like a tomato. "Heh, yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Like I said before, Harry, I'm totally fine with you two." A devilish grin came over Ron's face. "That doesn't mean I'm not going to give the two of you a hard time for it though, because that's just too much fun."

"You're awful."

"You're a wanker."

"Bollocks."

"Turkey"

"Pig," Hermione said as she came out of the door, sealing a charm on the room so it wouldn't change and only the three of them would be able to enter.

"Oh, come to join the conversation, Hermione?" Ron said mischievously.

"Only if it includes the incident at the Boar's Head," Hermione smirked as she passed Ron and grabbed Harry's hand, leaving Ron utterly shocked to contemplate the worst date of his life. A girl had shown up as Ron's blind date, and Ron hadn't realized until he'd gotten her to show her knickers that she was a little more than just a girl…

"Oh come off it, Hermione! Anyone could make that mistake! She was bloody gorgeous-I mean, oh sod it!" Ron yelled after his friends as they made their way up to the Headmistress office.

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"Oh, hello Miss Granger…Potter, Weasley," Professor McGonagall greeted Hermione with a warm embrace, and the two boys with a nod of the head. "Albus is anxious to see the three of you. He's missed you, Potter."

If it was possible for Harry to be any more apprehensive than he already was, then McGonagall saying that Dumbledore was excited to see him almost made Harry want to cry. Why hadn't he visited Dumbledore before? Had Harry really been that self-involved that he had shunned his mentor, his saviour to ease his own conscience? Harry had only seen the sleeping form of Dumbledore's portrait; he was not ready to see the lively, talking version.

"I haven't been able to get any work done with him chattering away, asking me about you, Potter. He's worried about you, and won't accept that you're alive until he sees you himself." Hermione, sensing Harry's unease, slipped her hand through his own and squeezed it in reassurance.

When the revolving stairs had brought them to the top, Harry, Ron and Hermione followed Professor McGonagall to a room that was painfully familiar to Harry. So much had gone on in this office from talks of Voldemort, to Umbridge's accusations, to temper tantrums on Harry's part, to private Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons on Voldemort. All the emotions Harry was feeling, both good and bad, gripped at his heart as a single tear poked at his eye. He stopped Hermione before they could get to the main office. "I can't do this."

She looked empathetic. "Harry, I know it's hard…"

"No, you don't understand. I literally can't do this," Harry choked.

Hermione moved to embrace him tightly, and Harry could feel Ron and Professor McGonagall watching them for a little while as he sobbed into her shoulder. They eventually retreated further into the office as Hermione traced circular patterns on his back and whispered to him over and over again: "It's hard, Harry, I know it is. You can do it." After a bit of weeping and sniffling, Harry finally pulled back from Hermione with blood-shot eyes and gave her a chaste kiss. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Hermione."

She grinned. "Likewise." He gave her another tight squeeze before taking up her hand again and following Ron and McGonagall. What he saw made him stop dead in his tracks: Ron was standing, facing Dumbledore's portrait, and having a lively conversation with their previous Headmaster.

"I don't know what you told him about Voldemort, but I still think the guy's a big fluffy white bunny. Well, perhaps a big…fluffy black rabbit, but same thing."

Dumbledore's portrait shook with the laughter Harry once remembered of their Headmaster. It was so real, and though Harry had known what to expect with a portrait, it was entirely new to him, seeing someone he had been so close to in this form.

"You're a good friend, Ron." The redhead grinned as his chest puffed up subconsciously. "Harry's lucky to have you as a friend, aren't you, Harry?"

Harry gasped at the address and froze up. He couldn't move; felt as though his feet were made of lead, until he could feel Hermione trying to pry herself free from his grasp. He was crushing her fingers.

"Oh, um, sorry," he said lamely to her. He then turned to the portrait of his mentor, and felt a tear fall down his cheek. Ironically, even though he didn't think it was possible, he saw a tear fall down Dumbledore's cheek too.

"Harry Potter," Dumbledore repeated. Harry had an overwhelming urge to reach out and hug the portrait frustrated by the fact that he couldn't actually embrace the man. "I have waited-years to see you. To see you happy, to see you healthy, and more importantly, alive."

"Oh, fuck," Harry cursed, not caring about the sharp intake of breath behind him coming from Professor McGonagall. Dumbledore didn't flinch. "Merlin, I don't even know what to say. Er-thank you?"

Dumbledore chuckled sadly. "You have nothing to thank me for, Harry. I had put you in far more danger than a wise man should put a child through." Dumbledore shook his head. "Harry, you have been through far too much to even considered having had a childhood."

"Sir?" Harry enquired.

"Your childhood, Harry, was much more dangerous than any other child's in history that I can imagine. If I could go back, take back all those years, I would have looked over you better, taken better care of you, acted as a mentor should…"

"Sir, you did everything you could. I don't believe there was anything else you could have done better."

Dumbledore smiled sadly. "I do believe we are on a first-name basis here, Harry." Harry nodded and Dumbledore shifted in his portrait. "So, I understand you have a question for me regarding the horcruxes?"

"Then, Albus," McGonagall sounded breathless behind him. "The rumours are true! Tom Riddle used horcruxes to preserve himself?"

The portrait of Dumbledore nodded. "I'm afraid it's true. How many have been destroyed now, Harry?"

"Four, but we have a good idea of what the other three are; we just need your help in finding them."

"We think Hufflepuff's cup is hidden somewhere in Hogwarts, sir," Hermione stepped in behind Harry. "We've figured out a sequence of numbers relating to the number of times a person has touched one of the horcruxes and when it is, well, detonated with a curse." Hermione paused, clearly in thought. "I personally think it has to do with the order in which Voldemort killed people in. He likes things in sevens, and I've found several superstitious ways to explain why."

A dull glint appeared behind the half-mooned spectacles. "I do remember hearing the mention that Hermione Granger was the brightest witch of her age." Hermione blushed. "I never once doubted it, and this just proves it. I applaud you, Miss Granger."

"The problem is," Ron said, stepping in on Harry's other side, "we still don't know where in Hogwarts the cup is."

Dumbledore nodded. "I know what you're saying, Mr. Weasley, but not even I know the bounds of Hogwarts." The three held questioning glances on their faces. "When I first learned that Voldemort had made horcruxes to keep himself alive, I began searching the entire spance of the school looking for possible horcruxes. During the summer I would search the Slytherin common room, and during the school year I would even ask Severus to…"

"SNAPE?" Harry bellowed at the portrait. "HOW CAN YOU TALK LIGHTLY OF THE MAN WHO MURDERED YOU?"

Dumbledore shut his eyes and spoke slowly. "There are things I cannot tell you, Harry, but my death was not an accident. There are certain…premeditated activities going on in the hopes of swaying some fallen people to look to the light."

"AND YOU HAD TO DIE FOR THESE PEOPLE? DEATH EATERS? WHO?" Harry demanded. "WHICH WORTHLESS PRICKS DID YOU DIE FOR?"

"Well, I remember one young man whom was very…contradictory to yourself."

"Malfoy?" Harry couldn't believe his ears. Even Ron and Hermione jumped back. "YOU GAVE YOUR LIFE TO SAVE DRACO FUCKING MALFOY?"

"Harry, you are seeing the smaller picture, here, and Severus is a wonderful mentor to young Malfoy…"

"YEAH! SO HE CAN LEARN TO KILL PEOPLE LIKE SNAPE KILLED YOU?"

"Harry," Dumbledore's voice never faltered. "I cannot tell you why I agreed to this, but it is a necessary point in eliminating Voldemort."

Harry breathed a few times before letting it sink in. "S-so you came into last year knowing you were going to die? That's why you taught me all you did?"

Another tear slipped from the half-moon spectacle. "I'm afraid so."

"B-but, why? I don't understand why Snape had to kill you for us to get to Voldemort."

"It wasn't entirely planned out as to when Severus would have to do it, but like I told you before, Harry, I trust Severus with my life."

Tears were coursing down Harry's cheeks. "B-but he killed you."

"And he saved you, Harry. I trust him to keep you and Mr. Malfoy safe. Severus is in a tough position right now. He is under a Fidelius charm to keep Draco Malfoy safe, and is also working at the feet of Voldemort to keep you safe."

"I-I don't…"

"Severus is working with the Death Eaters, yes. He is plotting evil, but also defending the good."

"But, can't Voldemort read his mind?" Ron asked. "Can't he figure out that Snape isn't working for him?"

Dumbledore nodded. "It's possible, but Severus is a skilled Occlumens. He was worn out a lot last year when he was conversing with Voldemort. I have faith that he will help you, Harry, to overcome and defeat Voldemort in the end."

Harry wasn't even listening anymore. He had retreated to sit in a chair nearby before his legs gave out beneath him. "I just don't know what to think," Harry said dazed. "I can't-I can't imagine why he still killed you, even if it was part of a plan. He just looked so…happy."

"Severus is very good at keeping a mask on his face. I don't believe you knew this, Harry, but Severus was very fond of your mother."

Harry's eyes widened significantly. "What!"

Dumbledore nodded. "He was very jealous of your father for all of his talents, and for the fact that he had snatched the one woman Severus had ever loved."

"W-wait a minute," Harry shook his head to clear the image of his mum and Snape kissing. "That's not possible. That would be like Malfoy having feelings for Hermione!" Harry could feel Hermione shudder against him.

Dumbledore let out another of his hearty laughs. "I can assure you, Miss Granger, that Mr. Malfoy has no such intentions, but yes, I suppose you could conclude that."

"That explains why Snape hates you so much, Harry," Ron noted. "He was reminded of your father…"

"And also why he's so willing to help," Hermione added. "Your eyes remind him of the woman he once loved…a woman killed by the man he once followed."

Dumbledore nodded. "Very conflicting struggles, but I once heard an old fool say that love conquers all. I do believe that love can override all other emotions as well, and that love Severus once held for your mum, Harry, was much stronger than the hate he held for your father.

"Severus told me when he came back, that he had begged Voldemort not to kill Lily when he came to get you. Voldemort had originally agreed, but of course retracted his agreement. That was the breaking point in which Severus agreed to come back to the good side."

"Oh, fuck," Harry cursed. "S-so that's why when I, well-when I see Voldemort killing my parents, he told my mum to step aside…"

"And also what saved you, Harry."

"My mum's love…" Harry shook his head. "So, in a way, Snape indirectly saved me?"

Dumbledore nodded. "If Voldemort hadn't considered sparing your mum's life, which he still took in the end, her love for you would have never saved you."

"That's mental," Ron breathed. "Absolutely mental."

"But-but why didn't you tell me this before?" Harry asked.

Dumbledore smiled sadly. "There wasn't enough time." Harry could only nod, knowing exactly what Dumbledore meant.

"So, if you're under a Fidelius charm, which I suspect you are," Harry started. "Then why can't you tell us what it is you're keeping secret? I mean, nothing can happen since, well, since you're-not here anymore."

"I can't exactly tell you, Harry, but I can explain to you the properties of a Fidelius. The charm doesn't only involve two separate people, but instead…"

"The binding of two souls," Hermione finished for him. "So even in death, the charm could harm the other person whom the charm refers to?"

"My thoughts exactly, Miss Granger."

Harry nodded numbly. "So, should we be hearing from Snape or Malfoy soon? I mean, I'm not about to throw a party for the two of them or anything…"

"I wouldn't expect you to, Harry. And I wouldn't expect any contact with the two of them until a crucial moment, but I hear a calling from the Minister's office that I must attend to."

The trio's eyes widened. "You keep in contact with Scrimgeour?" Harry asked incredulously.

"Yes, he finds it important that I walk him through his job every now and then," Dumbledore smirked. "Before I leave, I must tell you three how proud I am of your accomplishments, and don't give up on that number theory, Miss Granger."

Harry looked over at Hermione who seemed to have had another revelation. "Oh, of-of course, sir." With a wink, Dumbledore disappeared from his portrait.

The room was silent for a while after Dumbledore's departure, and Professor McGonagall was the first to speak. "I didn't realize what dangers you three were up against-I…" Harry watched as a tear fell down her leathery cheek and she moved to sweep Hermione into a tight embrace. "You be careful, do you hear me, Hermione? Take care of your boys. I know you can do this."

Even Hermione's eyes had filled with tears, Harry noted, as she stepped back from her long-time professor. "Thank you, Minerva." It was the first time either Ron or Harry had heard Hermione address McGonagall by her first name.

Professor McGonagall nodded to the three of them, and they took it as their cue that it was time for them to go. Waiting as the revolving staircase brought them back down to the entrance, they stood in an uncomfortable silence.

As soon as they had gone through the doors, past the gargoyle, Hermione took off running toward the end of the corridor where a large man-sized vase stood. Hermione carefully pulled it down so it was resting on its side on the ground and she peered inside, retracting her head moments later with a look of disappointment crossing her face. "I thought it would be in there," she said.

Ron cocked his eyebrow at her. "What?"

"The cup." Harry and Ron looked at her, surprised. "Dumbledore said my number theory was plausible, and, well, we're on the seventh floor, so let's start looking."

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"Ohhhh, Harry," Hermione moaned as he delved his tongue deeper inside of her, moving to circle her clit and push two fingers into her. She groaned and bucked her hips up to his mouth. Sucking her one last time was enough to make her arch off the bed and let out the loudest moan he had ever heard come from her. He watched her for a minute, and he knew he would never get over how beautiful she looked in complete ecstasy. Even as she came down from her high, she was still shaking from the intensity of her orgasm. Harry climbed up on the bed and couldn't help but to kiss her repeatedly.

A loud thump on the wall shook them both from the blissful moment and they could hear Ron shout from the other side, "Put a bloody charm on the room, you wankers!" Harry and Hermione laughed sheepishly as Harry pulled his wand from the bedside table and waved it to lock a silencing charm in place.

The trio had finally given up after searching the seventh floor all day for the cup. Of course, it didn't help that every time a student passed by, they almost wet themselves with excitement over seeing Harry Potter. The Gryffindor common room was the worst. Students flocked the trio when they entered. Thhey tried to search at dinner time when there wouldn't be any students around, but news had spread that Harry, Hermione and Ron were staying in the castle and they had skipped dinner to meet the famous threesome.

Harry chuckled at the memory. "I still can't believe that girl asked me to sign her bra." He could feel Hermione giggle against him, and pulled her against his chest, resting his chin on her head. They stayed like that for a bit until Hermione looked up at him.

"Harry?"

"Hmmm?"

Hermione kissed him. "Do you think we'll find it?"

Harry smiled and moved to lie on top of her and gave her a sound kiss. "Hermione, with your brilliance, I know we will." She grinned and gave into his kisses, subconsciously opening her legs to allow him to move between her. They had nothing on except Harry's boxers and she started rubbing her hips against his growing erection.

"Oh, fuck, Hermione," Harry groaned. "You have to stop that before I rip my boxers off and…ungh."

Hermione stopped moving and turned to roll out from beneath him. She reached around the side of the bed for her knickers and night clothes, tossing his own in his direction. Harry started tugging on his pyjamas silently, hoping she wasn't going to leave.

Hermione sighed and turned in his direction, her eyes downcast. "Harry, I-I hope you don't think that I don't want to sleep with you, I just…"

"Shhhh," Harry reached in her direction and pulled her into a tight hug, holding her head to his chest. "I understand if you're not ready, Hermione."

She shook her head. "It's not that, really. I just-well, I want to…wait."

"For marriage?"

She nodded. "Yes. I know it's so old fashioned and everything, but…"

Harry chuckled and hugged her tighter to him. "Hermione, if you want to wait until you get married, I totally respect that." He pulled back from her to look into her dark honey eyes. "I just want to tell you, though, that if you say yes, I won't be able to stop."

Hermione nodded again and pulled back from him entirely, looking down at her hands. Harry was afraid that he had scared her and that she would run back to her own room which, thus far, had been entirely unused.

He pulled her chin up to look at him, feeling a surge swell through his veins at the emotions he was feeling. "Hermione, I won't be able to stop if you say yes, because that's how much I love you."

He watched as a tear fell down her cheek and he reached up with his thumb to wipe it away. She attacked him, pushing him over and kissing him, and then settling into his chest again. "You're wonderful, you know that?"

Harry chuckled and kissed the top of her head as she fell into a peaceful sleep. It was difficult for him to fall asleep, however, because he had left himself wide open and vulnerable, telling her he loved her like he did, and then to have her not say it back. It pulled at his heart, making him want to cry. It was becoming harder and harder for him to lay in bed with her and not make love to her. But he held true to his word: if she asked him, he wouldn't hesitate…not even for a second.

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Just to let you all know, I still am doubtful that Snape is good. I just am making him good in this story for a reason you will come upon later. I still doubt that he and Malfoy will ever be good.

KILL THE DEATHEATERS…errrr, I mean…

So yes, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It was a hard one to write. :(

Thank you for all the reviews! You all truly are wonderful!

And speaking of wonderful, thanks Rylee! You are amazing! :) Thanks for catching the hands/fingers mistake. 8 | LOL!

The information about the seventh floor of Hogwarts can be found at this site:

http://www.hp-lexicon.org/hogwarts/castle/hogwarts_inside.html#Seventh

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