Unofficial Portkey Archive

Healing by cpt_slog
EPUB MOBI HTML Text

Healing

cpt_slog

12

"Mail," Hermione said for the second time. Harry heard her and shook his head from the fog that was enveloping within. He was sitting at the desk in his room, not really paying attention to anything, too deep in thought.

"Thank you." He took the letters and gently tossed them so they bounced lightly off the wall and fell onto a pile of other unopened envelopes on the desk.

"What were you thinking about?" Hermione asked him with a knowing grin.

Harry's non-spoken reply was a deep red blush that started in his cheeks and quickly spread to the rest of his face; Hermione laughed.

"Please tell me it was something to do with missing towels, because your guilty look is so adorable." She kissed the tip of his nose and stood back. A grin now grew outward, and it was clear Hermione had been right.

"What would you have done, Harry, if you'd been there?" she asked quietly. He closed his eyes, struggling for an answer.

"I've just been asking myself the same question."

"And?" she asked.

"I have absolutely no idea." And Hermione laughed again. Clearly this was a conversation she was eagre to explore further. She looked at the mail she had just handed him, the mail he'd simply cast upon the desk with complete disinterest.

"You aren't going to read them?" she asked. Hermione had two letters of her own and one had already been opened.

"Nope!" Harry answered.

"Why not? Are you afraid of them?"

"Yep!" he answered again.

"That's silly, Harry. What are you afraid of?"

"No news is good news, Hermione. I doubt there is anything here I need to know about and I'm having so much fun here with you and your family that I don't want to spoil anything. If that means that I have to go through the rest of my life blissfully ignorant, then so be it.'

"Harry, that doesn't make sense. Wouldn't it be better to read the letters and deal with anything they contain?"

"Of course it would. That would make perfect sense; that's what YOU would do. But then again you are smarter than I am and there isn't anything that comes up that you can't deal with. I'm not as good as you, Hermione. Take this letter," he said, picking up one of the two she'd just given him. "From Hogwarts. Obviously announcing everything you told me yesterday, so there isn't anything I need to know."

"Except who they've chosen to replace Dumbledore," Hermione said.

"McGonagall, who else?" Harry smiled, and Hermione smiled back indicating to him he'd been right.

"This one," he said picking up another one at random, "is from Ginny. So is this," he finished, picking up another. "Ginny will be here tonight so she can tell me herself what it says. Here is one from Remus, probably asking how I am, but as he is out of contact I can't get word back to him anyway. Here are two with handwriting I don't recognise, so I don't care. And lastly, one from Ron."

"And you'll ask Ron tonight what his was about as well? Really, Harry, if you aren't going to..."

"No!"

"No what?" Hermione wanted to know.

"No," Harry said again. "I don't want to know what Ron wrote, now OR later."

"Why?"

"Because it's either about something stupid like Quidditch, or it's more of what I had to listen to at his place, at the buck's night, and at the wedding. This expression you see on my face, Hermione, this is what I look like when I don't care."

Hermione looked down on him; Harry couldn't decide if she was cross with him or was instead concerned. He watched her for a while, watched her watch him. After a few minutes she smiled. She had worked out how to solve his problem. She scooped the letters up and sat on the bed.

"This," she said holding the Hogwarts letter, "is exactly as you say and exactly the same as mine so I'll tell you anything you need to know," she said.

"Of course you will," Harry said, taking the letter and bouncing it off the wall again so it fell on the desk.

"This one, and this one," she said holding the unknown letters, "both look to be in girls' handwriting, and I can smell the scented paper inside so it has to be fan mail."

"Like I need more of that!" Harry said as he took the letters and threw them on top of the other.

"These," holding Ginny's letters, "you REALLY should read, Harry. They may be personal. She's taken the time to write you, so you should give her the courtesy of reading them."

Harry took the letters, slowly. "I suppose you're right. I didn't mean to be rude."

"I know, but she's a friend and she cares about you."

Harry nodded, looking at the letters and reading Ginny's neat handwriting.

"This," Hermione went on, "you should read, but that is up to you. Remus will worry if he doesn't hear back from you."

Harry nodded again, and took the letter and Hermione continued.

"But there is no hurry for that one. THIS letter," she said, holding aloft the last one...

Harry sat there. He DIDN'T want to read it. He WASN'T going to read it. Hermione opened it and handed it to him.

" - - is already open so now you HAVE to read it," she said with her "I win again" look.

Harry couldn't do anything but smile back. He shook his head lightly, conceding defeat yet once again. Reluctantly, he started reading. Hermione could see there was only a single sheet of parchment (about average for Ron's letters) so she knew it wasn't going to take long, and it didn't.

Twenty seconds later, Harry screwed the letter up and bounced it off the open door, into the hallway. "He shoots and he scores!" Harry said.

"What was it?"

"Both. It was about Quidditch and the stuff he was going on about before, in that order." Hermione gathered the screwed up letter and started to open it.

"Harry, I..."

"I don't mind. Read it, keep it, I don't care."

Hermione opened the letter. After the `Hi,' Ron had jumped straight in and asked Harry what he felt the Gryffindor Quidditch team's chances would be.

The second paragraph (there were only two), informed Harry that he hoped Harry wasn't cross with him for what they had talked about, and that he would explain further tonight.

Hermione sat, the letter on her lap, as she silently watched Harry. She smiled and waited for him to speak. Harry knew what she was doing, and decided he wasn't going to give in. He would hold out this time; he wasn't going to say anything.

"What?" he asked ten seconds later.

"Ron was trying to apologise. You just skipped right over that part," Hermione said.

"The `hope you're not cross bit?' Better would have been `I'm an absolute prat'!"

"Don't be so hard on yourself," Hermione said with a laugh.

Watching her laugh, seeing her there, knowing what they had shared this week and how much all the Grangers had helped him, Harry's face softened.

"Am I? A prat I mean?"

"You're upset. You get yourself all worked up sometimes."

Harry sighed, "I know. I try not to, but it's just - - ."

"What was it that upset you, Harry?" Hermione asked. Harry knew the time had now come to discuss this.

"It wasn't so much what Ron was saying. It was more what he wasn't saying."

"I don't understand." Hermione said.

"Maybe it was more what I was telling myself. You were there Hermione. Ron was telling me I wasn't a good enough wizard because I didn't even know I WAS one until I was eleven."

"Ron didn't say that. He said he knew he was a wizard longer than you had. That's all."

Harry paused, trying to go through the conversations they'd had on the subject, but they now seemed like a lifetime away.

"He was saying that being a Muggle didn't matter. He was telling YOU not to worry what your Muggle parents told you about going back to school, and that my problem was that I lived in the Muggle world for so long."

Hermione said nothing. "Ron's not normally like that. What he said shocked me a little at the time but I didn't think about it afterwards. Besides, he never flat out told me to disobey my parents."

"But he did say you were of age in the magical world!"

"And I am. So are you."

Harry sat silent again, nodding. "Yeah but - -"

"But what?"

"Ron was talking as if the magical world is the only one that matters."

"That's because it's the only world he KNOWS. He was just being Ron; he didn't mean for you to take it any other way."

Harry sat, head bowed, considering her words.

"Harry, how DID you take it?"

"I took it to mean I wasn't good enough to be a wizard OR a Muggle."

"That's silly."

He shrugged his shoulders; he no longer knew who or what he was.

"Is that why you bought so many Muggle clothes?" Hermione asked.

Harry looked sheepish; it was impossible to keep anything from her.

"Yet another reason why you had no problems with the `no magic' rule?"

"Muggle matters, Hermione," Harry said, not really sure what exactly he meant.

"I know."

"Magic matters too, but so does Muggle," Harry said.

"I know," she said again.

Now Harry nodded. "Of course you do: your parents. Hermione, I can't tell you how great they've been. They make me feel like I belong." There was more he wanted to say, but his thoughts were confusing and jumbled. He didn't want to sound - odd.

Hermione nodded; she knew when to say nothing, something she had learnt from her mother.

"My grandparents, on my mother's side, were Muggle," Harry said, wondering how this information was slipping out.

Hermione nodded again.

Harry sighed deeply. He thought, for the first time, that he knew what he thought.

"Ron was right, about me living in the Muggle world for so long. I didn't know I was anything else. I guess I'm trying to come to terms with being both Magic and Muggle at the same time."

Hermione's smile grew. Harry had made the connection, and was on his way to making the breakthrough.

"You've managed to work out how to juggle both," he said to Hermione. "How do you do it?"

"I don't think about it, and yes sometimes it IS a juggling act. But you can do it, Harry. I know you can. Especially if you let me help."

Harry smiled again. "I'm not planning on going anywhere." he said. "Besides," he went on, "I still have secrets to tell."

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Really? Item number two?" she asked, pretending she had no idea what it could be.

Harry blushed; that wasn't what he was thinking of. "Er, no. Not that. Not yet," he lowered his head, avoiding her gaze.

At seeing this, Hermione knew she couldn't let Harry agonise for long. "That's okay, Harry, whenever you're ready. And I don't even mind if you don't tell me. Whatever makes you feel best."

"Maybe later, okay. Maybe after this is all over."

"What `this'?" she asked. "What do you mean, Riddle?"

"No, Hermione, I didn't think you would be happy to wait that long. No, I meant dinner," he answered and laughed. "I was talking about something I said yesterday that you either didn't hear, or you haven't asked me about but should've."

Now it was Hermione's turn to not understand. "What was that?"

Harry blushed again. "When I fell, I mean when you flattened me in the kitchen and almost opened my head like a coconut yesterday. I said - - ."

"I heard what you said, Harry, and I remember it too," she answered softly, now at his side. "You said `Sorry, I love you, goodbye.'" Hermione was smiling and had her arms around his neck. She knew what he'd meant.

Harry wasn't sure how he was going to repeat what he'd said in the event she hadn't heard him. But she had; Hermione DID hear him and she DID know. She knew!

Harry looked at her, their faces inches apart. He loved her. He did, and he knew it.

"But it's okay, Harry," Hermione said. "I'm giving it back."

Just like Hermione to throw him at the last moment. Now, he didn't follow her. "Giving what back?" he wanted to know.

Smiling, she answered, "The phrase, the words, the `I love you'. I'm giving it back."

"What do you mean giving it back? Are you asking me to take it back?"

Hermione looked radiant; Harry had never seen her smile more. Her skin looked to have sheen about it. She had never looked more beautiful. "No Harry. I'm giving it back. When you said it, you were lying on your back, stunned, in shock and pain. I'm not holding you to what you said."

"Why not?" Harry asked. Something told him that what he'd said to her yesterday evening was what every girl wanted to hear. Did she not like him? Was there somebody else? Could he have gotten everything so wrong?

"Like I said, you were in pain, shock probably," she replied.

"But, - - I - -."

"Harry!" she said to get his attention and kissed his cheek. "I know what it meant for you to say that. I really do, and I thank you for saying it. Just think about it first, okay? Think about it with a clear head, please. Don't say it until and unless you mean it. And if you don't say it again, that will be okay too."

Harry started to protest, to say something, but she held a finger to his lips and remained silent.

"Think about it first. Will you do that, for me, please?"

Harry didn't need to think, but he nodded his head.

"Thank you," Hermione almost whispered, and kissed him.

***

"Is there anything else you need a hand with before we leave, Harry?" Emma asked.

"There couldn't be. You've organised everything: the roast, the vegetables - - "

"You prepared the vegetables, all of them. I just put the roast in the oven," Emma said.

"And you made the sauces," Harry smiled. "We make a good team don't we?"

Emma smiled and hugged him. "So you'll be fine with the dessert?" she asked.

"Apple pie? Easy! Emma, this is going to be a huge success. I hope your dinner is just as good."

"Thank you, Harry. I'm really looking forward to it," Emma said. "Dr. Haladin was my mentor when I started taking psychology. If it wasn't for all of his help, I wouldn't have made it."

Hermione walked into the kitchen and up to her mother. She was wearing a red dress, wore makeup and jewellery, and had done her hair. When she saw Harry's reaction, she laughed. "So come on, Harry, tell me what you think?"

Dan walked in and let out a wolf whistle.

"I agree with him," Harry said, pointing to Dan. "You look great!"

"Thank you. And hey, you look pretty good too, Harry," she told him approvingly.

"What, this old thing?" he said back and all the Grangers laughed in response.

"Honey," Emma said to Hermione, "I have no doubt whatsoever that what I am about to say will be the most unnecessary piece of advice I have ever given you, but Dr. Haladin's number is in the address book up on my desk."

Hermione nodded.

"But seeing as how there will be five witches and wizards in attendance for dinner, I somehow think that nothing will come up that you can't deal with."

"I'd say they could take on a bunch of trolls," Dan said. "Do trolls gather in bunches or herds?"

"I'm not sure," Harry said. "I always sort of hoped they would move around individually. More than one at a time would be scary. Don't worry, we'll be fine."

"Ready, dear?" Dan asked his wife.

"Ready. Have you...?" she asked but did not finish the sentence. She looked at Dan, obviously sending some sort of message, and Dan responded.

"Taken care of." Dan smiled and kissed Hermione, before patting Harry on the shoulder.

"Mr. Granger?" Harry asked.

"Harry?"

"How do you two do that?"

"Do what, Harry?" he asked, still smiling.

"How do you and Mrs. Granger talk to each other without saying anything? I've been watching you both and you seem to be able to talk to one another, only nobody has to say a word."

Knowingly, Emma and Dan shared a look. They knew exactly what Harry meant.

"Harry, what can I say? It's magic," Emma answered. She gave him a kiss, and then kissed Hermione.

"Speaking of magic, Harry," Dan held out Harry's wand to him, but he just looked at it. "Take it, Harry. It's okay."

Harry shook his head. "Thanks, but no thanks. I don't need it."

Emma looked curiously to Dan and Hermione.

"Harry, I can't keep it, it's yours," Dan tried again, but Harry, not taking his eyes off the wand, still wasn't moving. "Really! Harry, when Emma and I told Hermione before you came of our decision not to allow magic, it was just because we were scared. After everything that had happened we, all right I panicked and we thought that by not using magic, we would somehow be keeping Hermione safe."

Harry shook his head again; he did not want it.

"Harry?" Emma said.

"Harry's okay, Mum," Hermione said finally. She took the wand from her father and held it. "I'll hold it for him until he wants it back," she said.

Satisfied at that compromise, Emma nodded. "Okay then, we're off. Have a good time. We'll be home late, so if you aren't up when we get home we'll see you tomorrow."

The Grangers left, leaving just Hermione and Harry alone, although Ginny, Ron and Gabrielle would arrive any time.

Thirty minutes later, Ginny and Gabrielle arrived with a Crack! in the centre of the lounge-room. Harry, standing in the kitchen looking over the numerous pots, saw them first.

"Hi, Harry," Ginny said, smiling. She was wearing a formal robe as was Gabrielle, and both girls had obviously spent a great deal of time getting ready with makeup and their hair. Harry thought Ginny looked as good, if not better than he had ever seen her before. But whatever that little monster was that was in his chest before when he thought of her, it was now gone and had been replaced with peace. Harry loved Ginny, he knew, as a sister. He thought, no knew, he would be there for her any day or night if ever she needed. He would support her and protect her, but his heart now belonged to another.

"Ginny, Gabrielle, it's good to see you. Where's Ron?"

Hermione, walking in from the dining room, went to Ginny giving her a hug and then hugged Gabrielle.

"Hermione," Ginny said, "you look fabulous!"

"Doesn't she?" Harry agreed.

"You should talk! You two look gorgeous! Where's Ron?" Hermione asked. "Isn't he coming?"

"He is, but I wanted to make sure it would be okay if we brought along another guest," Ginny said.

"Harry?" Hermione asked.

"Not a problem, the more the merrier. Who is it?"

Ginny smiled but didn't answer. "I'll get them. Back in a jiff," and she was gone before anyone could say anything.

"What smells zo good?" Gabrielle asked.

"Dinner," Harry said. "Roast beef, all the trimmings. It's just about ready. I was just waiting for everyone to arrive before carving it up."

Gabrielle went to Harry's side in the kitchen and began inspecting the dinner. Harry spooned a little of one of the sauces and watched as Gabrielle's eyes indicated her pleasure.

"You iz ze cook, `arry?

Harry nodded.

Harry had cut a small sliver of the beef off one end and grabbed it with a fork, holding it out for Gabrielle to take. For a moment he thought she would politely decline, but at the last instant the smell won her over. Her eyes sparkled, and she opened her mouth slightly, allowing Harry to pop it in. As soon as the morsel registered with her tastebuds it was clear she was impressed. Hermione, watching from the centre of the room, looked on, surprised, but not really surprised, at how proud she was of Harry.

"I `ave not tasted such meal for a long time," Gabrielle said.

Before Harry could respond, another Crack! was heard and Ginny, Ron, and Luna stood in the kitchen.

Ron, seeing Gabrielle chewing by the stove, locked eyes on Harry. "Hey, they've started already!" he said.

"You haven't missed anything, Ron" Harry told him, walking to his side and patting his shoulder.

"I brought a date!" Ron said with a grin, and Hermione didn't know what to say. Ron - Luna - date?

"Don't listen to him," Ginny said, bursting Ron's balloon while she hit him on the arm. "Luna popped in at the Burrow an hour ago so we hoped you wouldn't mind if we brought her along."

"Luna, it's good to see you," Hermione said.

"Thank you, Hermione. You look very nice," Luna replied, and for the first time Ron noticed Hermione, what she was wearing, and how she looked. His jaw dropped. Gabrielle laughed upon seeing his reaction.

"How is everything set up in the dining room?" Harry asked Hermione.

"All set," she replied.

"What," Ginny said, "no time for the guided tour?" Ginny looked at Hermione secretively. She had been to Hermione's house before, and had even stayed for a week at a time during the holidays. Apart from Harry, Ginny was the only one that had been here before, which was why she had to Apparate the others. Hermione assumed Ginny wanted to talk.

"Certainly, where are my manners?"

"We'll stay here," Ron said. "We've seen houses before. Besides, we're hungry." Ron and Luna remained where they were, and Harry started preparing the serving of the meal.

"This way," Hermione said to Ginny, who promptly grabbed Gabrielle. The two Weasley girls followed Hermione up the hallway, and into her bedroom. Technically Gabrielle wasn't a Weasley... but that was only a technicality. In Ginny's eyes, Gabrielle was a sister. As the three walked in, Ginny closed the door behind her and her face wore a wry grin.

"About your last letter Hermione - - ," Ginny started, and stopped when Hermione laughed.

Gabrielle and Ginny watched Hermione, all three girls with smiles.

"What was that all about?" Ginny finished.

"Iz `arry really your boyfriend?" Gabrielle asked.

Hermione thought for a moment. How would she answer? "I guess he is."

Ginny looked as if she didn't believe her; but Hermione had never lied to her before. It had only been a week, but Hermione looked different. Her dress and her hair made her look fabulous, but there was something else. She looked happy; she WAS happy.

"Tell!" Ginny urged. "We need to hear EVERYTHING!" Ginny's need for gossip temporarily took dinner from her mind.

"The whole family has all been through a lot in the short time Harry has been here, especially me and Harry," Hermione said. "Dad was nearly killed and now he looks at life through new eyes. Harry saved him from being mauled by a dog, and he has really opened up to us, to me. He's told me all his secrets. Well just about all of them. He told me he - - ."

Ginny was still looking for a sign that this was a joke, but she couldn't think why Hermione would joke about such a thing. And she looked so different, so happy. She waited for Hermione to finish the last sentence, but she didn't. "He told you...?"

Hermione shook her head; she wasn't saying another word, but she would give Ginny a clue. "And you can tell Tonks when you see her next that now I DO know what it feels like to snog Harry. In fact I know quite well: we're getting pretty good at it," she said with a giggle. It was Ginny's idea to talk about this, but Hermione was now glad she had. It felt good to open up with her friend.

"And the bunny-rabbit nose bit?"

"It's true. He wriggles his nose when he drifts off. It's adorable."

"Hermione, you're pulling my leg," Ginny told her.

"Well, let me explain, but first let me show you where Harry's been sleeping," Hermione said with a wicked smile and a wink. She grabbed Ginny's arm, as if to lead her out of the room. They reached the closed door and Hermione spun her around, arm outstretched, indicating her own bed.

Ginny wasn't buying. "Right! You're telling me Harry has been staying in here, with you?"

She couldn't answer, but nodded, still smiling. No longer a secret, Hermione felt good. She obviously needed to confide with Ginny, and Gabrielle as well for Hermione also felt close to her. "But before you ask, nothing's happened. We've just - - ."

"Jut what?" Ginny asked.

"Kissed, and slept."

"Hermione, are you crazy?" Ginny asked.

"What will you do if your muzzer finds out, Hermooney?" Gabrielle asked.

"Mum knows, so does Dad. They brought us breakfast in bed this morning."

Ginny went quiet, so it had been a joke all the time. She raised an eyebrow asking for explanation.

"Pancakes!" Hermione added, as if that explained everything.

"Right! Wait here!" Ginny decided Hermione's outrageous lies needed to be exposed once and for all. She walked out of the room and back to the kitchen. "Harry? What did you have for breakfast this morning?"

Harry had been talking to Ron about something, and Ginny's question had derailed his train of thought. He tried to remember back to this morning. What was it? Bacon? Cereal? Toast? No.

"Pancakes!" he said, not sure why he was being asked.

"Where did you have them?"

She knew! Hermione had confided in Ginny and now she knew! Before Harry could tell himself he didn't mind and had done nothing to be embarrassed about, a deep beetroot blush started on his neck and filled his entire face within seconds.

Ginny's eyes grew so big, they were huge! Harry - Hermione - Both of them! She turned around and began to march back to Hermione, who she could hear laughing in her room. As an afterthought Ginny spun back around and announced to Harry, Ron, and Luna, "Dinner will be just a minute! We have something to deal with first!" She stormed back into Hermione's room.

***

Harry brought the tray with the roast to the centre of the dining table, and set it down. It looked and smelt great. Hermione and her mother had set the table together with a white linen tablecloth, candles and a formal dinner setting; it looked amazing. Harry wondered if he was going to have to hold Ron so that the others could serve themselves first. He sat in the empty seat, next to Hermione, and Ginny sat on Hermione's left. One the other side Ron faced Harry, with Luna next to him and Gabrielle. Ron made a slight greedy motion towards the food before Harry stopped him.

"Whatever happened to ladies first?" Harry asked him.

Hermione picked up the tray of potatoes while Ginny and Gabrielle started with vegetables. The way Ron watched on, one would almost think he hadn't eaten in a month. The dishes passed around the table, everyone placing generous portions of food on their plates. It all smelt so good nobody held back. Even with the unexpected dinner guest there was plenty to go around; there had to be - Ron was there.

With a smile Harry passed a plate of potatoes to Ron, who took it as the sign that the potatoes could start their doomed, lemming-like march from the bowl to his plate, where they would be quickly devoured. Lifting his fork as he would a spear, Ron was about to attack the defenceless meal on his plate when the lack of any other motion caught his eye. He was the only one looking down on dinner with the insatiable eye of a falcon swooping on its prey. Nobody else was moving, they were all looking at him, smiling, waiting, watching as Ron was not able to wait. Ron looked across to see Harry smiling at him.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Harry said to all, and lifted his glass of soft drink. "To good friends."

"Good friends," Hermione responded, followed by the remaining girls. Ginny and Gabrielle joined in, followed by Luna. Ron, reluctantly put down his fork and lifted his glass. "Yeah!" he said simply. "Eat now?"

Hermione laughed, while Ginny looked as if she was embarrassed.

"Yes, Ron" Harry agreed, "Eat now."

He did. They all ate, giving voice to what they thought of the meal.

"Harry, this is amazing!" Ginny told him. "You made all this?"

"Emma helped," he said simply.

"Don't listen to him, Ginny. Mum hardly helped at all. Harry did practically everything, all on his own. He's cooked a few times already, probably more times than I have all year."

For Ginny, the news that Harry cooked was secondary to something else he had said. "Emma?" she asked curious, giving Hermione a look.

Hermione laughed as she saw what Ginny was driving at. "He calls her Mum too. It's so sweet," she said, ruffling Harry's hair.

"My Dad cooks all the time," Luna said.

"Harry, you've gone all soft on us," Ron told him. "You shouldn't be cooking. You have other things to worry about."

Ron's dinner conversation left a lot to be desired. It wasn't what he said, or even how he said it. It was more a case of watching the battle between Ron pausing only as long as necessary to get his words out so that he could continue getting food in. Sometimes he managed to do both simultaneously.

"What other things?" Harry asked.

"Quidditch!" Ron replied as if it should have been obvious. "How are we going to win the House Cup if Harry is down in the kitchen organising the House Elves? Soft, mate, you've gone real soft."

Hermione stiffened; Harry felt her. But before she could respond Harry laid a hand on her leg underneath the table. His touch was gentle and had the effect of calming her. Harry looked relaxed and in control. Nothing Ron could say was going to bother him tonight. He was among friends, and he couldn't be happier.

"Ron, I'm not playing Quidditch this year," Harry said.

"But you're going back, right?" Ron asked hopefully.

Harry said nothing, but his smile gave him away. He looked at Hermione and winked.

"I'm thinking I probably have to, Ron. Someone has to keep an eye on you."

To Hermione, this unexpected news was the best thing she had heard in a long time. "Harry, are you sure?" He nodded, he was sure; it was the right thing to do, the strong thing to do.

"You've changed your mind?" Ginny asked, also smiling.

"Hang on," Hermione interrupted. "What about the nightmare, about Riddle, about - - ."

"It's all right, Hermione. I'm not scared of him, or anyone. I don't care if I have to fight Riddle and a legion of Death Eaters just to get through the gate. I'm going back."

"What about everyone else?"

"I can't help them if I'm not there, Hermione. I'll be watching constantly, every second. I'm going back."

"And you were going to tell me this when?" she asked grinning.

"Later," he said and watched in amusement as Ginny and Gabrielle caught some meaning in that word and laughed.

"Boy, Hermione," Ginny said, elbowing her lightly to get her attention. "You sure have changed him in a week. What happens in another week?"

Hermione smiled and patted Harry's leg underneath the table. "I'm not altogether sure, but it should be fun to find out."

"Tell him he HAS to play Quidditch!" Ron blurted. "He HAS to or we don't have any chance of winning."

"I don't know, Ron. Ginny did as good a job of seeker as I ever did, better probably," Harry replied.

"Thanks, Harry. But I just got lucky," Ginny smiled sweetly at Harry's praise.

"That always worked for me too," Harry said. "Perhaps you can explain to Ron that I'm not playing. Ever again. It's not part of who I am anymore."

"What do you mean not who you are?" Ron wanted to know in between shovelling food. "You're Harry Potter, the youngest seeker in a century."

"Well, Ron, I'm not so young anymore. Besides, Ginny is younger than me and she did win the last game. You managed then without me and you'll manage the next one as well, and the one after that and the one after that." Harry had the air of someone who would not, could not, be talked out of his decision.

Harry beamed; he could not be happier. He was going back to Hogwarts, back with his friends and damn Riddle or anyone else who tried to stop him.

"What do I have to say to convince you?" Ron wanted to know.

"Nothing. There's nothing you can say."

"Tell me why again?" Ron asked. He was looking for an angle, any angle to talk Harry into playing again.

"I don't want to," he said smiling.

"What kind of answer is that? I don't want to face another Potions class but I have to." Ron was clearly starting to get worked up. To him it was more than a game. It held the potential to make him more than he felt he could otherwise could be.

"They are two totally different things, Ron," Harry said, inwardly laughing that so much of Hermione had rubbed off on him that he was starting to even sound like her. The rest of his friends at the table watched the exchange with interest. Clearly something important was happening here. "The lessons are supposed to be the reason we are going back," Harry continued. "All of us! If I play or don't play Quidditch, it has no effect on my classes."

"I don't agree, Harry," Hermione told him with a smile. "You'll have more time for homework."

"And for getting into trouble," Ginny added.

"Who," Harry asked with a grin. "Me?"

"I WON'T believe that you've already played your last game then," Ron said sadly, admitting defeat.

Harry didn't know what to say to add to his point, so he simply shrugged.

"I wish you had told me at the time," Ron said. He looked disappointed and stopped eating... always a sign he was upset.

"Why?" Hermione wanted to know. "What difference would it have made?"

Ron shrugged. "If I knew it was the last time we would all be playing together I would have enjoyed it more."

Harry nodded; that made sense. "Well, Ron, what can I say? There is a last time for everything. I guess the idea is that we are supposed to get caught up in the moment, enjoying every second. You never know when those last times are going to spring up on us."

The words seemed to ensnare the mood of all sitting at the table. Without meaning to, Harry's words had struck a chord within each of them.

"So what have you two been doing all week?" Ginny asked Hermione, in an effort to lift the mood of the conversation.

Stealing each others towels, she thought. "We watched a couple of movies," Hermione said.

"Lord of the Rings," Harry chipped in. "Ron you HAVE to see it, it's awesome!"

"What is?" Ron asked.

"Lord of the Rings. There is this bloody great troll in it, just like the one we saw in our first year."

"You're kidding!" Ron said, surprised and a little scared at remembering the troll that had very nearly killed Hermione.

"Nope! It's even bigger and scarier than the one we saw," Harry said.

Ron was now reliving the memory of what that troll had done. "Scarier?" Ron asked.

"Yeah, and meaner too. But heaps more stupid," Harry finished.

Hermione watched Ron's expression and saw he was starting to go white. She laughed in an effort to get Ron to relax. "I'm sure you and Harry would have been able to deal with the one in the movie," she said confidently.

Ron nodded, perhaps trying to convince himself. "I had nightmares for weeks after that," Ron said.

"I didn't see it clearly the first time," Hermione told him. "The second time wasn't so bad but only because I knew we all lived through it."

"The second time?" Ron asked.

Hermione realised that Ron and the others didn't know what she was talking about. "Harry brought Sirius's Pensieve with him. He set out all these memories of things he had seen and done. Mum, Dad, and I watched them."

Ron looked shocked, and Ginny also had an amazed expression.

"What do you mean you watched memories?" Ginny asked.

Harry turned to Ginny and explained. "You fill the Pensieve with water and put the memory in. Then you put your face into the Pensieve and it feels like you are right there when the memory takes place."

"Harry, tell me you didn't!!!" Ron gasped.

"He did," Hermione answered. "Harry went for a walk and Mum, Dad, and I watched them all. We saw everything Harry would have seen: the troll, the flying car, the Basilisk - - ."

"The spider??" Ron asked, horrified.

Hermione nodded, thinking back to that sight. "Yes, we saw Aragog. Mum screamed and Dad tried to run away."

"HARRY!!!! What are you going around showing stuff like that for? You could have traumatized the lot of them!!!"

Harry agreed; he had taken a chance and the consequences of his actions didn't bear thinking about. "I know, but I thought it was only fair for Dan and Emma to see some of the things Hermione and the rest of us have been through. I wanted them to see how strong and capable she is." Harry looked at Hermione and gave her his patented smile that said so much more than words could.

"Ginny," Hermione said. "I saw you in the Chamber, lying so still like you were dead. It was horrible!"

Hermione gave Ginny a hug and Ginny hugged her back. "I should have known Harry would do everything he could to save me," Ginny said.

"And me!" Ron chipped in.

"Yeah, Ginny," Harry agreed, "Ron was there too."

Ginny was going to say something, but she bit her lip.

"And because Harry thought to show Mum and Dad the memories," Hermione continued, "they have agreed to let me go back to Hogwarts."

Ginny squealed, and even Luna brightened up at the news.

"Gabrielle is coming to Hogwarts too," Ginny said.

"Oui! I am looking forward to seeing the school again." Gabrielle smiled in anticipation of being with her new friends at Hogwarts.

"Great!" Harry said. "You'll love it."

"So that means we're all going back. All of us!" Ginny was ecstatic. She picked up her glass of soft drink and raised it in toast. "To us!" she said and everyone returned the toast.

"What is this stuff?" Ron asked looking at his drink.

"Soft drink," Harry told him. "You're in the Muggle world, Ron, so I'm afraid there is no pumpkin juice to be had."

Ron looked down at his drink again, as if he was deciding whether he liked it. Returning to the previous conversation, Ron turned to Luna. "You're still going to commentate for us, aren't you?" he stated more than asked.

Harry, Hermione and Ginny all rolled their eyes and Gabrielle giggled to see their reaction.

"I don't know," Luna informed him. "Professor McGonagall said it should be someone who knew more about the game."

"Are you crazy? Is McGonagall crazy? That's what I loved about it, you were - - mad. I was laughing my head off when I was listening to you. It was the funniest thing I've heard, ever." Ron laughed and soon his laugh became infectious. Everybody was laughing along as they remembered Luna's commentary. Even Luna had a smile as she was reliving it all.

"It was fun," Luna said.

"Good, settled!" Ron said finally. Turning to Harry and Hermione, Ron said, "Gabby got a letter from Hogwarts the same as we did. Professor McGonagall explained that she wouldn't have to be sorted as she isn't going to be a first year, so guess which house she is going to be in?"

Hermione and Ginny smiled, and Gabrielle smiled back.

"Ravenclaw?" Luna asked.

"Er, no Luna," Ginny said wondering if Luna was joking. Luna seldom joked.

"Hufflepuff?"

"Gryffindor! Gabby's going to be with Hermione and me."

"It's going to be so much fun," Hermione said.

"And Ron?" Ginny said.

"What?"

"Gabby doesn't like it when you call her Gabby. She'd be happier if you called her Gabrielle."

"What? That's stupid. You girls call her Gabby?"

"She doesn't mind if it comes from us."

Gabrielle, Ginny and Hermione all giggled while Ron has a puzzled expression. Harry was smiling because finally the conversation had been taken away from Quidditch.

***

After the meal finished, Gabrielle, Ginny and Hermione were speaking in hushed tones about the wedding and how Gabrielle was fitting into the Weasley home.

"I hope Ron hasn't annoyed you too much," Hermione said, leaning over towards Ginny and Gabrielle.

"Little too much," Gabrielle said with a smile. "But Geeny helps me when Ron iz being - - ."

"When he's being a prat!" Ginny finished for her.

"That's just Ron being Ron, Gabby. He was the same way with me the first time I stayed with Ginny. The novelty will wear off and he'll leave you alone eventually," Hermione told her.

A grin spread across Ginny's face as she looked in the direction of Harry. "What about THAT novelty, Hermione? Any chance of it wearing off?"

"I hope not," Hermione said. She looked at Harry who was talking with Ron and Luna. Well more like Harry and Luna were listening while Ron was going off again. Ron had said something and Hermione watched as Harry rolled his eyes again.

"Bollocks!" Ron said. "Im-bloody-possible. You're either one or the other, Harry. You can't do both."

"Hermione manages it," Harry said as Hermione turned her head to at hearing her name mentioned. As if to demonstrate Harry put his arm around her and drew her close.

"Manages what?" Hermione asked.

"Being a Muggle and a witch at the same time. Sometimes more one than the other but you still balance them together, don't you?" Harry asked her. "Ron was just telling me it had to be either one or the other."

"Why does it have to be one or the other?" Hermione asked, sensing another argument was raring its ugly head.

"That's the way it is, always has been. You're either born with magic or you aren't," Ron said.

"What about a Squib?" Harry suggested. "If Mrs. Figg were here, she'd probably tell you that you were talking rubbish."

"Well she isn't here, and anyway unless you're planning to go into the Squib business it doesn't count."

"So what are you saying, Ron? I'm making yet another mistake?"

"Not a mistake - you're just not looking at things properly," Ron said, now noticing all eyes were turned upon him.

"Ron," Ginny said "give it a rest. Leave poor Harry alone for once."

"Poor Harry? Oh yes, I forgot: poor Harry doesn't want to play Quidditch anymore. Poor Harry is talking about dropping out of the magic world. Leave poor Harry alone and try not to hurt his feelings." Ron was now worked up and could feel himself getting angrier and angrier by the minute.

"Ron," Harry started "I haven't decided anything yet. I'm still trying to feel my way through."

"You decided to give Quidditch the flick pretty fast. What's to say - - ?"

"It's my decision to make, Ron, not yours." Harry was trying to keep his voice calm but he could feel himself getting angry; he felt he shouldn't have to continue justifying his decision.

"Ours! It was our decision. You didn't even discuss it with me first. Instead you sprung it on me without giving me a chance to talk you out of it. We're supposed to be best mates."

"I have nothing to say." Harry and Ron now wore the same cross expression and both with their arms folded.

"Then why did I buy you a Quidditch book for Christmas?" Ron asked.

"I never asked you to," Harry said.

"Waste of bloody money that was!" Ron replied. He couldn't even see how rude he was being; it was almost as if he was wearing blinders and saw the world only how he chose it to be.

"ENOUGH!" Harry shouted. "You can have the bloody book back!" Harry rose from his seat and stormed out of the room without giving Ron a chance to say another word.

"Ron!" Hermione said through a forced whisper.

"Ron!" Ginny said. "What are you doing? Hermione and Harry have gone to all this trouble and all you can do is - - ."

"Harry should play," Luna said. Up to now she had only watched the conversation without taking part. "He's good at it."

"See?" Ron said. "Luna agrees with me. I NEED him to."

Hermione knew she should support Harry and be mad with Ron. But she couldn't really be angry.

"Ron, up to today Harry wasn't even going back. Now he is. Can't you be happy with that? It's only - - ."

Ron sat up sharply. "Don't you DARE tell me it's only a game. I get enough of that from Ginny and I don't need to hear it from you too."

Silence fell upon the table. Hermione didn't know what to say to find out what it was that was upsetting her other best friend. As it turned out, she didn't have to. Luna took matters into her own hand.

"Ron, what is it?" Luna asked.

He paused, started to answer, stopped himself and sighed. He didn't know what to say. "It's not JUST a bloody game. It's the only chance I have of making anything of my life. It's all right for the rest of you. Hermione is heaps smart, everyone loves Ginny and they'll love Gabrielle too; you'll get heaps of job offers. Luna, you have your dad's paper to go to. What have I got?"

He paused again, looked down and without realising had scrunched the napkin on his lap into a tight little ball. "I always hoped I could play Quidditch after school. Don't laugh. but - - ."

Silence again.

Ginny spoke up, for the first time seeing some of her brother's private demons. "Nobody's laughing, Ron. But if that is REALLY what you want to do then it hasn't anything to do with Harry."

"It has everything to do with him," Ron replied. "Do you think I'd have made the team without him?"

"But - - ." Ginny's interruption was cut off by Hermione suddenly falling into a coughing fit, remembering how she had `assisted' Ron's trial that made him a member of the team.

Ginny looked at Hermione, who apologised, then went on. "Ron, if you are good enough or - - ."

"I know," Ron said quickly. "It's all up to me and if I'm good enough I'm good enough. But Harry makes me better. Just having him in the team makes me better. I can't explain it better than that."

He looked down sadly, and Luna again broke the silence. "Have you thought that you might make Harry play better too, Ron? Being the close friends you are."

Ron thought about that, and softened slightly. Hermione suggested another way.

"Ron," she said softly; he looked up slowly. "You are his closest friend. Ask him the real reason he isn't playing. The REAL reason," Hermione said.

"I did, you heard him. He - - ."

Hermione shook her head. Harry had never spoken of it, even to her, but she had guessed what else could be on Harry's mind: Dumbledore. For the first time, Dumbledore wouldn't be there to watch him play. Hermione suspected that had a lot to do with it.

Ron seemed almost to read Hermione's thoughts because he either understood what hadn't been said or something very much like it.

"Why didn't he say something?" Ron asked, now feeling bad for the way he had gone.

"I don't know if he even realises it himself."

Ron looked up in the direction of the hallway, and wondered what was taking Harry so long. "I'll get him," he said and disappeared after Harry.

Less than a minute later Ron walked back to the table, without the book and without Harry. Something about his expression had caused everyone to stop and look. He looked awkward, odd, worried.

"Hermione," Ron said, "he needs you."

"Neither of you can find a simple book? Honestly, Ron!"

"He needs you! Something's wrong and he can't tell me what it is. He's just standing in the doorway and looking at the window." Ron looked worried, and slightly embarrassed. Although he had lowered his voice hoping that only Hermione would hear him, everybody heard, and all other conversation ceased.

Ginny looked to Hermione, and Luna turned around to look at Ron. "He's crying," he said. Ron didn't understand, and although he had seen Harry cry before, it wasn't an emotion he was entirely comfortable seeing from his best friend.

Hermione stood slowly, scared at what might have affected Harry. He was a little angry with Ron sure, but other than that he'd been fine all evening. He had joked, included everyone in conversation, and generally played the role of host.

Walking slowly, tentatively, she stopped just short of where Harry stood in the middle of the doorway of his room. He was looking at or out the window. "Harry?" she asked, but he didn't respond. He didn't move, and didn't take his eyes off whatever it was he was looking at. Tears were falling down his cheeks like small rivers; he made no sound. It didn't look like crying in the normal sense.

"Harry?" she said again, noticing the change that had come over her as well. Whatever it was that had upset him was starting to upset her too. It was clear Harry couldn't speak. Ginny, Gabrielle and Luna were standing a few steps behind Hermione as she reached the doorway, looking in. She saw it in an instant, but didn't know what it meant.

Standing in a vase on the desk of Harry's room was a bunch of sunflowers. They brightened up the whole room, and Harry couldn't take his eyes off them. He was smiling and crying at the same time. Hermione looked at Harry, and it took a moment to register that he wasn't crying as he had in previous days. What she was seeing were tears of joy.

She went to the desk, and picked up the tag resting against the vase. She read it, recognizing her father's handwriting and brought it back to Harry, handing it to him. Never feel you are alone, love Dan and Emma. Harry read the note, and now he couldn't take his eyes off it. Ginny inched toward the doorway, looking in to see what was going on.

"The flowers," Hermione explained.

"What do they mean?" Ginny asked.

Hermione shrugged her shoulders as Harry put an arm around her, drawing her near, and kissing her forehead.

***

Everyone understood the significance of the flowers once Harry had repeated the conversation he had had with Dan days earlier, and moist eyes were all Harry could see, except for Ron of course. Ron appreciated the thought of the gesture Hermione's parents had made; he just didn't think a bunch of flowers was the sort of thing that should cause anyone to lose it like Harry had.

"I'm sorry, everyone," Harry apologised, wiping his eyes again.

Ginny was first to speak. "You have nothing to apologise for, Harry. It was a lovely touch. Of course it moved you."

"`Arry, you must `ave deeply touched `ermione's parents for zem to `ave left the sunflowers," Gabrielle said.

Hermione nodded, but hadn't composed herself enough yet to speak. Harry was hugging her and smiled. He felt it was good to be around friends, around people who cared for him.

"I guess it was just a release of stuff I was holding back. I'm all right," he assured them. Hermione looked up at him, smiling, and he kissed her deeply. She kissed back, and heard the silence echoing in her ears; it almost felt as if the oxygen had been removed from the room.

When they broke the kiss, Hermione saw the smiles from Ginny and Gabrielle. Ginny raised an eyebrow, but seemed genuinely happy for her friend. Luna had that classic Luna expression on her face: no expression, Ron looked slightly shocked. Harry kissed Hermione's forehead and finally let go.

He turned to Gabrielle, and silently gathered her in a hug, kissing her forehead too. Next came Ginny, though he held her slightly longer. He approached Luna, who still hadn't changed her expression. She seemed to have no indication of what Harry was going to do. Harry hugged her, and kissed her as he had the others. Finally he looked at Ron.

"Mate?" Ron said, uncertainly. "You're not going to - - ."

He did. Harry took the two steps and had Ron in a hug before he could break away. Harry held Ron for a long time, and only at the last instant did Ron's hands come up, hugging Harry back timidly.

"If you kiss me, Potter - - ."

Harry smiled, and kissed him on the forehead. The awkward expression on Ron's face caused Hermione, Ginny and Gabrielle to laugh. Harry merely went on smiling. "Thank you everyone. You all mean so much to me. Never for a second doubt how much you mean."

A/N I know I've said it a few times but I want to give another HUGE big thankyou to my Beta IronChefOR for all his hard work, and for making this all so much better.


-->