"It Won't Be the Same This Year"
By: Vince Gill
Let There Be Peace on Earth cd
Verse 1:
It's time to pack our bags and hit the highway,
And head on back for Christmas holiday.
I won't fall apart when I pull in the driveway.
It's my first time home since brother passed away.
Verse 2:
His favorite time of year was always Christmas.
We reminisce about the days gone by.
Oh, how I wish that he was still here with us.
My memories of him will never die.
Chorus:
When the stockings are hung,
Silent Night has been sung,
And Christmas is finally here;
It won't be the same this year
Verse 3:
Losing my big brother hurt so badly.
Its help me learn what Christmas really means.
There's nothing more important than your family.
We're all the children of the King of Kings.
Chorus 2x
"It Won't Be the Same This Year"
By: imagination_running
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Please don't sue!
Summary: Song fic from Vince Gill's "It Won't Be the Same This Year" off of his Let There Be Peace on Earth cd and of the song "Silent Night". The first Christmas after the Final Battle between Harry and LV. A tear-jerking Christmas fic.
Hermione packed her bag. Today was Christmas Eve, and she had agreed to stay with the Weasleys for the holiday. She would stay the night with them tonight and come back home tomorrow evening. She didn't really want to celebrate anything. In fact, she hadn't been in a celebratory mood for about seven months now - since the Final Battle. It had been a horrific ordeal, and in the end, Voldemort had been defeated. However, taking Dylan Thomas's words to heart, he had not gone "gentle into that good night." In his final moment, Voldemort had shot a spell at Harry; it wasn't a killing curse, but it was as good as because Harry had died just days later, having never recovered from the wound it produced.
Hermione stopped her packing and sat down on the edge of her bed. Every time she thought of Harry's suffering the days following the battle, she broke down into tears. She was trying to get over it, and on most occasions she could stop herself from dwelling on what happened, but sometimes, like now, she couldn't. She fiercely wiped the tears from her eyes and face and stood up. "Get a grip, Granger! You need to get past this!"
She threw a blouse into the suitcase, and quickly took it back out, folded it neatly, and placed back in. Double-checking to make sure she had everything she needed for one overnight stay. She went to the sitting room of her flat and gathered the gifts that she had bought, leaving only three small envelopes under the tree. She would take care of them later tomorrow evening.
Hermione flicked her wand once and sent the suitcase and the bag of gifts to the Burrow. Then, with a final check of the flat, she Apparated to the Weasley home.
The first thing Hermione noticed upon arriving at the Burrow was that it was in its normal frenzied state. People were everywhere, chaos was running rampant, and food was cooking in the kitchen. She was greeted by Fred and George who were setting up fireworks for the evenings show. Knowing those two as she did, Hermione guessed that they were doing far more than what appeared, but she decided she really didn't want to know. After they tried to magically change her hair color and offered her a rather dubious looking pastry, she finally managed to make it to the kitchen door where she was immediately grasped around the waist in a bear-tight hug by Ginny.
Hermione laughed a little and hugged back. "Well, it's good to see you, too, Ginny. It's been what, all of one day since I last saw you?"
Ginny laughed and stepped back. "Has it only been one day? With this bunch it seemed more like two weeks! Mum's been going haywire over the Christmas preparations. Fred and George have been being all they ever are, and Ron's been moping because he hasn't been able to go see Luna! Not to mention that everyone's been arriving. It looks like a regular hotel around here!"
Hermione smiled. "Who all's here?"
"Well, Mum, Dad, me, Ron, Fred, George, Bill, Fleur, Charlie, Remus, Tonks, and you. Luna is supposed to be coming over later for a while, and if I remember right, she's bringing her dad. Charlie's girlfriend is coming over tomorrow for a few hours, and so is Neville."
"Nothing like a Weasley Christmas…" Hermione murmured as she took in the familiar Burrow Christmas decor.
Ginny's laughter tinkled around Hermione. "You got that right, girl. Now, come on! I'll help you get settled in, and then you can go greet everyone else."
Once they were in Ginny's room, the red head turned to Hermione, frowned, and sighed, "You've been crying again."
Hermione's eyes widened and she said, "No, I haven't! I'm fine! What made you think that?"
"Don't even try to feed me that lie, Hermione. I can see it in the way your standing and everything. You've got upset again. Are you sure you want to do all of this?" Ginny gestured to the house around them, indicating the Christmas celebrations.
Hermione sat heavily on the bed. "Well, what else am I supposed to do, Ginny? Go to my parents? Gee, that'll be interesting - it would probably make the headlines: Hermione Granger, smartest witch of her age, goes mad and spends entire Christmas in a graveyard. Thanks, but no thanks."
"I'm sorry, Hermione. I just meant that you could come tomorrow for a few hours instead of staying here the whole time - if you want to, that is. I know it's hard for you."
Hermione didn't say anything. She just nodded.
"Look, stay here as long as you need. Go back to your flat, if you'd rather, but I hope you decide to stick around. I'd love stay here with you, but Mum needs me in the kitchen," said Ginny. She leaned over and hugged her older friend. Then, she walked out the door, closing it quietly behind her.
*********
Ginny went into the kitchen where she found Ron and her mother. Ron was cooking the only thing he could - toast - and nibbling on everything else in sight. He looked up as soon as Ginny came through the door. "Ginny! Is Luna here?"
Ginny rolled her eyes. "No, Ron. She won't be coming over for another four hours. Quit asking everyone that and make your toast."
"The only reason I was asking is because I heard the door open earlier, and I thought she may have come early."
"That would have been Hermione. She's upstairs in my room, and how did you hear that door opening?"
Ron cleared his throat, looked down at the toast and mumbled something that sounded like "It happens" but Ginny wasn't sure. She knew what he meant, though. During the previous year's expedition, his senses had been heightened, especially that of hearing because of all the dangerous adventures he had taken part in with Harry and Hermione. She immediately regretted her question and started to make soup.
Ginny looked over to where her mother was busily engaged in preparing a pie and thanked all her lucky stars for merciful person who had given her mother a set of wizarding wireless headphones for her last birthday because it always upset Molly to think or hear talk about the last year and a half. Ginny wasn't sure she could handle her mother breaking down right then.
After several minutes, Ron managed to get himself under control and said, "Did you say that Hermione is in your room, Ginny?"
"Yes. Why don't you go talk to her?" Without even waiting for the toast to finish, Ron left the kitchen.
*********
Ron bounded up the stairs, but slowed considerably before he reached Ginny's door. He knew why Hermione hadn't come down as soon as she had set her bags down, and he wished that there was something he could do to ease her pain. He sighed and leaned his forehead against the door. He wished Harry were there to help, but if Harry had been there, then there would be no need to cheer Hermione. It was an ongoing problem, and he'd been struggling to deal with it for seven months. If it weren't for Luna, he was sure he himself would have gone bonkers by now.
At last, he straightened back up and knocked on the door. He heard Hermione softly say, "Come in," and he opened the door.
"Hey, Hermione."
Hermione walked quickly to him and gave him a hug. "Hey, Ron. I was just about to come down."
"Ginny said I could come up and talk to ya for a bit. Your eyes look red-rimmed; are you okay?"
Hermione looked down and to her left and sighed. "No, but I will be. I know I need to move on, but…it's Christmas, and you know how much he loved Christmas ever since he started Hogwarts." Her voice had raised an octave as she spoke, and she also kept speaking faster until she dissolved into tears on Ron's chest.
He held her tight, letting her cry all she needed. He knew she'd been trying to move on, but he also knew it was harder for her than anybody else. He gently smoothed her hair as he said, "I know, Hermione. I know."
After a few minutes, Ron felt Hermione pull back. He watched as she wiped her face off with her sleeve. Silence surrounded them, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Ron knew she needed time to compose herself, so he didn't push. He'd only seen her like this once before, and at that time Harry had been there to help her deal with everything. That was over a year ago, though; back when Hermione had just received word that her parents had been killed in a Death Eater attack.
Finally, Hermione finished wiping her face and straightening her hair and clothes. Ron looked at her and said, "I miss him, too. I think, sometimes, that I'll turn around and he'll be there, but it never happens."
Hermione nodded. "It hasn't been and it won't ever be the same without him. This was going to be the first Christmas he would be free of Voldemort…of the Dursleys. It's not fair, Ron. It's just not fair."
Ron hugged her again and said, "I know, Hermione. I know."
*********
The next day, Hermione awoke to a several presents at the foot of her bed. Ginny was not in the room, so Hermione guessed she was already downstairs helping with the final dinner preparations. Hermione was given several books, a few quills and ink bottles, one very nice blouse, a few boxes of her favorite candy, and a single white rose. The rose brought tears to her eyes. It reminded her of the previous Christmas…
She, Harry, and Ron had been on the hunt for Horocruxes for several months. There had been no time for shopping even if the stores had been open. In the end, they had returned to the Burrow for Christmas, but had not managed to bring a single gift for anyone. However, when she had woken up that morning, she had discovered a single white rose amongst her presents, and the little card had been simply signed "Love, Harry." It had meant more to her than any of the other gifts she had received.
She looked at the card attached to the rose. It said, "He'll never be gone from your life as long as you remember him. Happy Christmas! -Ron." Hermione smelled the beautiful rose and smiled through her tears. Then, she left the warmth of the bed, put on her fluffy house shoes, and went to get a small cup of water for the delicate flower. Once she had the rose set up on Ginny's window sill, she went and knocked on Ron's door.
She heard Ron stumble, swear, and say, "Hang on, Ginny! I said I'll be right down!"
Hermione giggled. "It's not Ginny! It's me, Hermione!"
The door suddenly swung open. "Hermione! Happy Christmas!"
Hermione smiled and laughed again. "Happy Christmas, Ron! I just wanted to say thank you for the gifts. I've needed more ink and quills, and the rose is beautiful!"
Ron smiled back. "I'm glad you like them, Hermione, and I'm glad to hear you laughing and see you smiling again." He hugged her, but it didn't last long because without warning, Hermione pushed him back and yelled as she took off down the stairs, "Last one down is a rotten dragon egg!" Not to be outdone, Ron ran down, hot on her heels, ducked her out of the way at the last five steps from the bottom, and jumped the rest of the way.
They were both out of breath and laughing so hard that tears were pouring down their cheeks. The noise they had made brought everyone to the bottom of the staircase to see what was going on. At long last Hermione gasped out, "You…You are a…cheat…Ronald Weasley! Jumping doesn't count!"
Ron laughed more and shook his head. "Not…the way…I remember it! Harry jumped…and you let him win!"
Hermione, who had gained her breath back, laughed again. "You don't understand, Ron. I bet he would win the race, but he bet he would lose it. If I lost the bet, then I had cook, but if he lost, then he would have to cook. He tried to win the race and the bet, which was impossible. He jumped and reached the floor before I did. Then, he said that since he jumped, it didn't count, so I won the race and lost the bet. I told him that the only requirement of the race was to reach the floor first, so he won the race and lost the bet, which meant, he had to cook. Simple as that!"
Ron was still grinning. "So why did the rules change for me?"
Hermione smiled coyly and said, "Because this is a different race and there are no bets in which the loser has to cook!" Everyone laughed as Ron looked scandalized and stuck his tongue out at Hermione. She just smiled.
*********
Hours later, after all the gifts had been opened and food eaten (which was saying something considering the shear amount of food that had been cooked), everyone sat scattered about the Weasley sitting room sipping on hot chocolate and listening to the wireless play a marathon of Christmas carols. As the evening whittled away, the DJ finally announced that the last song of the night would be "Silent Night" played by a muggle orchestra. Hermione looked over to where the wireless sat on an end table and saw Mrs. Weasley reach to turn the box off. Quickly, Hermione said, "No! Just this last song - please." With a puzzled look on her face, Mrs. Weasley left the wireless on.
Hermione sat back and listened to the orchestra play the beautiful song. It was gorgeous, and she swayed slightly to the beat of the music. As the last note faded out, Hermione smiled. "Thank you. Thank you, so much!"
The wireless was turned off, and everyone sat for several minutes without saying a word. Finally, Lupin, who was across the room from Hermione asked, "Why did you want to hear it so badly?"
Hermione looked at him. She knew everyone was waiting for her answer, so she took a deep breath and said, "For a few reasons. One, I love to hear the muggle orchestra play. The music is beautiful, and it's not often that I am able to hear a muggle orchestra in the wizarding world.
"Two, my parents always sang that song to me on Christmas day when I was little girl. Normally, they didn't sing much, but they never neglected to sing it on Christmas day. Even now, I can hear their voices harmonizing and blending.
"And third, last year Harry and I were walking through Godric's Hollow around Christmas time. We were headed to his parents' graves because he wanted to put some flowers on them for Christmas. As we were walking down the street, we came to a house where a group of carolers were singing. We stopped to listen for a bit. It was the first time Harry had ever heard the song "Silent Night." Of course, having so recently lost my parents, I was in tears even as it began. Harry noticed and pulled me close. Right out there, on a sidewalk, under the stars, in front of about 30 people we didn't know, and in the middle of a war, we danced as the carolers sang. Harry loved the song. He said it was one of the most beautiful that he had ever heard.
"Throughout the entire hunt, I think that was the most relaxed he ever was. I'll never forget how peaceful he looked after the song was over, nor how he held me so close and gently as we danced. It was the best time I'd had in a long while. I think it was for him, too."
Hermione looked up and noticed that there were few dry eyes in the room. Unsurprisingly, she felt tears on her own cheeks as well. She looked at each of the faces and knew that they were still mourning Harry, but she also knew that they had been encouraged by the story. It always brought back a smile to her face to think of how he had looked as the song ended, or of how her parents' voices blended together as they sang the familiar hymn.
"Hermione?"
Hermione looked up at Tonks, which is who had called her name. "Hmm?"
"Would you sing it? I'd like to hear the words again. It's been a long time."
Hermione wanted to say no because she knew her singing voice was nothing to rave about, but instead she said, "Yes." Everyone looked at her, which made her nervous, so she closed her eyes and sang:
Silent night! Holy night! / All is calm. All is bright. / `Round yon virgin, mother and child. / Holy infant so tender and mild. / Sleep in heavenly peace! / Sleep in heavenly peace!
A small applause went up as she finished the song. Hermione blushed and said, "There are more verses, but I don't know them."
"Eet was lovely, `ermione," Fleur responded. "But, what doz eet mean?"
Hermione smiled and explained that it is a Christian carol that tells the story of the birth of Jesus Christ the Messiah, who was born of the virgin Mary in Bethlehem on Christmas day. She explained that He is the Savior to all who believe in his death and resurrection - that his death paid the price for all mankind to be saved from the depths of Hell itself, should they only have faith and believe.
"Harry really connected with the story. I think it is because of the things that Jesus went through before He died. He literally had the weight of the world on His shoulders, too. I don't know what Harry ever did with the information, but he did love the song. I heard him humming it a lot after that."
"I did, too," said Ron, "but I didn't know what it was. I never asked, and Harry never said. I'm glad it brought him some peace, though."
*********
Later that evening, at about 8:00, Hermione finally Apparated home. She went over to her small Christmas tree and picked up the three envelopes: one to Harry, one to her mother, and one to her father. Then, she Apparated to the graves of her parents.
Quietly, she knelt down. "Mum. Dad. It's Christmas, my second without you. I still miss you so much that there are times I can hardly stand it. I love you so much! I know that you always said you don't need a gift, and I also know that you can't actually read these. But I wanted to do something for you, so I wrote you each a Christmas card. Take care of each other, okay? I love you! Happy Christmas!"
Hermione placed the cards at the head of the graves. Then, she stood up and dusted off the top of the double tombstone before bending over and placing two kisses on the granite surface. She took a step back, looked at the graves one last time, and Apparated to another cemetery hundreds of miles away.
It was snowing at Godric's Hollow. She peaked out from behind the building and looked up and down the street, but unlike last year, there were no carolers. She knew there wouldn't be, though because they all would be with their families in the comfort of their homes.
She made her way to the now familiar graveyard. Finally, she reached the corner where the graves were nearly hidden from view by the weeping willow. She moved behind the limbs to the three graves were laid alongside each other. She stopped at the oldest two first.
"Mr. and Mrs. Potter. It's me, Hermione. I came to talk to Harry, but I wanted to tell you Happy Christmas, too. I hope you are keeping Harry in line. He needs it. Don't argue, Harry, you know you do! Well, it's snowing, and I still need to talk to Harry. Take care, and Happy Christmas!" Once again, Hermione dusted off the headstone and kissed it twice. Then, she moved on to the last grave hiding behind the willow's limbs.
"Hey, Harry! I got your rose this morning. Thank you! It's beautiful! I know Ron bought it, but he did it for you. I told everyone about our song, Harry. About how we danced as the carolers sang just down the street from here. Most of them cried, but it made them happy, too.
"I also told them about the story of baby Jesus. I told them that you really seemed to connect with the story. I didn't tell them that I hope you believed it, though, Harry, but I really do hope you did.
"I have something for you for Christmas, Harry. It's just a card, but I really wanted to give it to you. I'll lay it right here." She laid the card at the head of his grave, right next to the headstone.
"It's getting cold, so I need to go. Don't get into too much trouble, okay? I love you! Happy Christmas!"
Without another word, Hermione kissed the marble tombstone, stood up, and Apparated back to her flat feeling better than she had in months.
*********
Author's note: I hope you like my terribly sad Christmas fic. Actually, this fic kinda took a life of its own from the "Silent Night" section down, but I like. And yeah, I know, I'm cruel to my characters, but please forgive me and review anyway. (I'll put in a good word with Santa for you!) Merry Christmas everyone!
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