"I want you to turn around and look at me, just look at me, Hermione." His words were calm, 'almost disturbingly calm' Hermione thought.
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Hermione did what was she was told, and slowly turned to face Harry. His eyes were full of a raw emotion she hadn't seen in a long time, "I am sorry, very sorry." He muttered, a startled Hermione spoke softly "what are you -" but her words were sharply cut by his lips crashing on to hers; kissing each other with an unknown passion for both of them. After what seemed like hours, they broke the kiss, panting for air. An awkward atmosphere surrounded them as the disengaged from their embrace and slowly backed away from each other.
Hermione's mind was racing, 'Did he really do that? Was he kissing me? Did he mean that to happen? Does this mean he loves me? He kissed me like if he loved me but…' "Hermione?" Harry's voice brought her back from her silent reverie and as she looked at him the tears that had been kept in the back of her eyes started to spill freely all over her face, Harry too was crying.
"Hermione, I'm sorry, I don't know what came onto me, I'm sorry, this was all a huge-" Harry's apologetic babbling was interrupted by Hermione's fierce voice even through her tears
"Don't, don't you dare apologize! Don't say it was all a huge mistake, Harry, just don't say it!"
Harry stood there, rooted to the ground, looking at her, his expression was the one of a deer caught in the lights, "but… what do you mean? We can't do this Hermione, it is wrong, Ron's my best friend and you are with him, I tried to walk away from you, I tried to stop loving you, but I can't, it just won't go away! I can't help it!"
"Why didn't you say something? Why did you wait until now? Now that I'm engaged, now when I'm about to be married to Ron! Why didn't you say something before you broke my heart?" Her silent sobs turned into full bawling at this point; at the sight of this Harry attempted to comfort her, but Hermione took a step away from him, away from his embrace, away from the pain his recent words had inflicted on her.
"I couldn't tell you! Ron's my best mate and it wasn't fair, it isn't fair! He keeps thinking that I've got everything in the bloody world, but he's the one that has everything I ever wanted, he's got a family, he's not a marked man, he wasn't stalked by a psycho killer since he was born!… and now… now he has you; and if you leave him, he'll die, you weren't there, you didn't see him…" Harry's words were fast and quiet; his voice was drenched in despair as the memories of the day when he gave her up flooded back to him.
"What are you talking about? When didn't I see him?" Hermione demanded, and Harry told her the truth about the day when Ron destroyed the locket, and everything that the locket tried to use against Ron, until the part when he told Ron the biggest lie of his entire life. "…he was devastated, and I was utterly confused, up until that moment I hadn't even thought about what you meant to me, so I told Ron what I thought I knew… that I loved you like a sister, that you most probably felt the same way about me. That was the day I gave up on you; I've regretted it ever since..." He finished, feeling defeated, he told her everything that was to be told and now he felt empty, not knowing what would happen now.
"How on Earth could you assume such thing Harry? You never asked me about my feelings towards Ron, or towards you for that matter, you and Ron played with my affections like I was some prize to be won! And during all that time that we spent without Ron during the Horcrux Hunt, you could barely look at me! You'd rather look at some spot on the Marauder's Map! How do you think that made me feel Harry? It was then when I realized that you could never love me the way I'd wanted… and I too gave up on you! But if you waited this long to tell me how you felt…" Hermione sighed, feeling a loss of words so profound and that so rarely occurred that it made her come to a halt in the conversation.
When she spoke again, her tone was determined and uncharacteristically harsh "If you waited all this time to tell me about your true feelings, if you had to see me with another man to realize them, it means that I was nothing but a whim for you, a pretty idea of something you couldn't have, a capricious concept and nothing more, and to be honest Harry, you have already broken my heart too many times for me to allow you to this now, now, from all times you had to choose the day I promised Ron to marry him to tell me about this. I can't do this, not to me, not to Ron and not to the Weasleys. I loved you, Harry. I really did… and now… I just don't know how I feel anymore."
Hermione turned on her heels and left the clearing, Harry didn't even try to stop her. She left him alone and with that single thought in mind he collapsed onto the ground, crying, as the sun shined through the February clouds he could still hear the muffled steps and sobs of Hermione in the distance, it still was a beautiful morning but in Harry's eyes it was the most gray and horrid morning of his whole life.
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A/N: Thanks again for the reviews, it's the greatest pleasure for a writer to get feedback on your work; and thanks a lot to my beta ShadowCat. I wanted to clearify, I'm not a native speaker, so I'm bound to have some mistakes, please feel free to point them out, also, the chapters aren't long, I know, I will certainly try to write more often and well… more. Also the first 5 ½ chapters are already written, so I will post them as soon as possible. Again thanks a lot