DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter, J.K. does, and she has every right to do whatever she thinks is best for Harry Potter. I just love writing. So sue me. Wait, seriously… don't.
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Okay.
Now here's the chapter which I haven't put up here before. And I'm guessing that nobody has read this.
Personally, I liked this chapter because of the conversation. But I'm not really saying all of you are going to like it.
Anyways, thanks for all those who reviewed. And, just a reminder, I wrote this when I was 15 years old. I'm 19 now. So I could say that I've improved a lot with my writing. This story is being put up just for fun…so don't flame me or anything, ayt?
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Hermione tossed and turned on her bed late that night. What had happened earlier that evening made sleep impossible for her. Every time she came close to slipping into a deep a slumber, the look on Harry's face after hearing her last words kept on materializing in her mind.
Until now, she couldn't trust herself for what she had done. She had been mad, yes, but she didn't intend for what she had said to come out; she didn't even know where those words came from. All she knew was the reason she had said them. But despite that, she couldn't believe she had declared the end of their friendship.
But then, what had gotten to her in the end wasn't pride or hurt, but the need for revenge.
She loved Harry, but her days of covering up her pain with smiles and laughter were over. All the evading and running she had been doing to prevent their friendship from ruin had now come down to a point where what they had suddenly lost meaning.
Still, Harry was her best friend. And he was right. She just couldn't put so many years behind them as if they had shared nothing at all. But could she forgive him after all the accusations he had thrown at her? Sure, they had exchanged bitter words and she was still mad at his insensitivity, but her anger couldn't go on forever. No matter what she said, his friendship meant everything to her and losing it would be ten times painful than not having her love reciprocated.
And just like that, she made up her mind.
The next day, she would tell Ron they weren't pushing through with the plan anymore. After what happened, going back wasn't anymore an option for her. She would just accept that life as Harry's best friend was the one she should and would always be living. If their misunderstanding was a sign of their what-would-be relationship, then she'd just take whatever they have now than risk further losing it to something not even close to a memory.
Hermione woke up the next day feeling very tired, but positively energetic. She stood up, stretched a bit, went to the bathroom and dressed herself up for another day. Knowing her mind was clear and her future, though still hard for her to accept, was meant for her to have, she felt hopeful.
With the sun shining brightly and the sky portraying the bluest shade she has ever seen, she felt almost peaceful. She couldn't help but notice how a fine Saturday morning it was! And smiling had suddenly become inevitable for her even as she made her way out of the room.
She was about to take the stairs when Harry appeared from the Boys' Dormitory. He was rubbing his eyes sleepily, looking as if he didn't get a good night's rest either. Her smile faded completely as he saw her.
Though she was certain she was not that angry any longer, his hurtful words still upset her and she wouldn't let him off that easily. She would have to talk to him eventually, but not now when her wound was still fresh and without relief. For the time being, she was intent on treating him the way he had been regarding her of late. With a great amount of effort, Hermione looked away and proceeded downstairs.
With a miserable and puzzled look, Harry watched her as she disappeared behind the portrait hole. `She seemed happy…' He considered with depression. `Was she glad we fought?'
As he walked towards the Great Hall, he remembered what happened the night before. He didn't mean to lose his temper the moment he saw them together. It was just seeing them together at a late hour confirmed to him Ron and Hermione were dating. Although he knew he wasn't entitled to prevent her from being romantically involved with someone, he was terribly hurt they were hiding their relationship from him.
As he entered the Great Hall with that thought, the first sight that caught his attention was Hermione walking over to where Ron was seated. He continued to watch as she bent down to whisper something in his ear and without his usual protests; Ron nodded, stood up and walked away from the table, following Hermione closely.
Harry stared in wonder as to what on earth she could have said to make Ron give up his meal. His question was put to a stop, however, when he realized his friends were approaching the entrance, close to where he was standing.
He stepped out of the way as they came close and kept an eye on them, expecting either one to glance at him like Hermione did earlier in the tower. But they walked by him as if they didn't see he was there.
It wasn't possible, he thought with agitation. He wasn't small and definitely not invisible. Surely they had seen him. The fact was--they were ignoring him.
And this notion suddenly had Harry sprinting after them. He caught up just before they could turn around the corner and grabbed Hermione by the elbow.
She was glaring at him even before she could turn around to confirm who he really was.
"What do you want, Harry?" Ron asked warily before she could.
"I just want to apologize," he said uncertainly, looking at her instead of him.
"I can't see why you'd want to," Hermione avoided his eyes.
"What are you talking about, Hermione? I'm your friend, of course I'd want to apologize after what happened last night."
Something about what he said apparently got on her nerves because the moment he heard the tone in her voice, he just found himself staring back. "Have you forgotten already, Harry?" She asked him with a sharp voice. Wincing, she told herself, `I can't believe I'm going through with this!'
"I don't…"
"Didn't I tell you last night our friendship's over?"
"You weren't serious, are you?" Harry stared at her, stunned. "Look. What I said, forget about it, all right? I didn't mean any of it. And I'm sorry."
"I know you, Harry. You don't just say things if you don't mean them," Hermione whispered achingly. "I was disappointed with you last night, do you know? I mean, it's not as if you haven't put me down before, but what you said finally made me realize how wrong I was to think you know me well enough, because you don't. After what happened, I'm just grateful I found out before it was too late."
She turned to walk away when Harry held her hand to stop her again.
"Let me go," Hermione's voice was cold but he ignored it.
"No," he shook his head. His eyes found hers. "Hermione, I know I can't take back the pain I caused, but I can take back what I said."
"Let me go," she said once more, trying to take her hand back.
"Just--just hear me out," he held her hand firmly, but she continued to pull away. "I was confused and angry of what you said about me ignoring you because I didn't want to admit it was true. And I still can't accept it. But--but if that's what it would take for you to forgive me, then I'll agree I had been neglecting you."
"I'm not asking you to admit anything," Hermione said. "I just want you to know I'm not mad at you for nothing. I don't want you to think I'm just seeking attention."
"If I give you my attention, Hermione, it's because you deserve it. You don't need to do something for me to see you. I'll always be around when you need me; you know that, don't you?" he asked her, his handclasp tightening.
"What I do know right now is I can't look at you without thinking of what went on last night. You may say you didn't mean what you said, but I heard your words, Harry, and they came from you. No matter how hard you try to show me you don't think of me that way, there had been a point in time when you did," Hermione said. Then, with her free hand, she wiped away the tears that had been flowing down her cheeks and spoke quietly, silently imploring him. "Now, please, leave me alone."
"I--" he wasn't able to finish what he wanted to say because she had already turned around and walked away. But Ron was still standing next to where he was and Harry chose to relay his message through him.
"I didn't mean what I said, Ron. Tell her that. And since I can't seem to get it out of her mind that I think of her as--as that way, maybe she'd at least accept that I feel really bad about it."
"Don't you get it? She's not mad just because of what you said. She's angry because you don't want to admit that all you ever did for the past year was kept her informed on how Cho looked, how she laughed, how she held your hand…" he raked a hand through his hair. "You had been blind, Harry. And Hermione--she tried to open your eyes for the first time last night. But what did you do? You still kept them closed. And now, you're here, trying to patch things up with a simple sorry. Well, you have to do something better than that, don't you think?"
"What else can I do? Every time I get near her, she acts as if I'm not there. But if she does talk to me, it's as if I'm conversing with a frosty wall. I can't see what I had done wrong. Cho's my girlfriend and it's only right I pay attention to her."
"How long have you been going out with her, Harry? How long?"
"A year."
"A year." He repeated blandly. "And how long have you known us?"
"What's your point, Ron?"
"You know your numbers, why don't you practice on weighing them? Maybe you'll see what Hermione's been trying to tell you for the past few months."
"Ron--"
"I'll see you around."
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"Are you all right?" Ron asked when he finally managed to catch up to Hermione.
"I'll be fine," she muttered looking down at her shaking hand.
When she didn't say anything else, "You told me you wanted to talk to me about something," he reminded as he held the entrance doors open so she could step out before him.
Hermione was silent for a moment. Then she looked up at him. "I--"
Could she do it? Could she give up something powerful just within her reach? It would be wrong to go through with it. Yes, it would. But she wanted it so much, more now than she did last night.
But with an entirely different reason.
If last night, she wanted to go back for love--now, she wanted to go back for friendship.
To think it would just be easy for things to go back to normal. She'll just have to accept Harry's apology and everything would go back to the way they were. But, the damage has been done and she wouldn't be able to go through another day, thinking that their relationship nearly ended because of a misunderstanding. What she wanted was to change everything that has happened by destroying the roots of it.
And that was the day when Harry asked Cho out.
She wasn't sure if changing it would also change what they had experienced but she was willing to take the risk. Especially now that more than her own heart is at stake, she was willing to do whatever it takes.
With a deep breath, she finally said. "I wanted to tell you to be ready for our plan."
"Is that all?" Ron asked her.
"Yes. Why?"
"I let you drag me from my meal because I reckoned you had something really important to tell me."
"Isn't this important?" Hermione asked, frowning.
"Course it is," Ron shrugged. "But I figured you'd let me finish eating first if what you had to tell me turned out to be as simple as the one you said."
"You'll never change, will you?" Hermione asked, laughing in spite herself.
"No." Ron shook his head, and then draped his arm on her shoulders in a brotherly gesture. "But you like me the way I am in any case, so why bother?"
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A/N:
Be back tomorrow with another chappie…=)
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