*waves*
Hi and Happy New Year PKers Just thought I'd say hi and jump back into the fandom with a fic I've had on my computer for mooonths. Three parts and finished, daily updates from now, set after DH, sidestepping The Epilogue of Doom. I've spilled a lot of angst over posting this..but today I decided to Get Over Myself. *gets over self* *feels better for it* Also, am hoping it will inspire other dusty WIPs I have.
All my thanks go to the gorgeous Yen/Hippogriff Lover, for the lovely beta/fangirling and for encouraging me to post and also just because she is a rockstar. Plus a big thanks to Lady Bluestar on LJ who looked over it for me eons ago too x
Now for the fine print…
Warnings: Sorta kinda an affair fic I guess. And a total Angst-athon. So if that bothers you at all, or if angst is not your thing, then back quietly away…shhh…
Authors note: Aargh, I'd like to keep this A/N short but… This is quite a strange style - it's almost just a lot of drabbles strung together. Anything in italics is random parts of the future (not necessarily in order). Normal text is the present. I know some of you might not like it, but it's my attempt at something original.
Also, the song that inspired this fic is `Lips of an Angel' by Hinder.
Disclaimer: Not mine, I just like to put em in hats and make em dance.
………………………………………….
"Hermione…"
Harry looked up slowly from the half unwrapped present in his hands. He watched her, standing there blushing slightly, not meeting his eyes and was horrified to feel tears pricking at his eyelids. Hastily he looked back down at the small square mirror in his hand and turned it over, reading the familiar inscription on the back.
"What? What is it?" Ron looked from one to the other, noticing their averted gazes and shuffling feet. His hand had frozen halfway between the bag of crisps he was holding and his mouth. "What?!"
"It's the mirror." Harry said in a small voice. He cleared his throat and looked over at Ron. "It's Sirius's mirror." He smoothed a thumb over the glass surface then braved a look at Hermione again. "How did you fix it?"
She was still blushing but lowered her face to bend down and pick something up from her bag.
"I just… I did some research on strengthening the Reparo spell." She pulled out a tattered book with a faded cover that read `Repairing Unfixable Magical Objects'. She waggled it self-consciously then dropped it back in the bag. Stooping again, she pulled out another object - a matching mirror. "This is the partner to it; I went and saw Aberforth and he gave it to me. I took yours from the trunk at Grimmauld Place."
He looked at her hand, slightly shaking as it held out the mirror. Ron had stopped chewing as he watched them both closely and then peered at the mirror too. Harry reached out and took it, holding it delicately as Hermione spoke again.
"I hope you don't mind. I needed both of them to fix the broken one."
Harry held both the mirrors in front of him, knowing what he wanted to do next. Ron was watching them a little too closely - but he could see all the effort Hermione had put into his birthday present and for once, he would just do what he felt.
He held one of the mirrors back out to her.
"Here, you take it."
She raised her eyebrows at him. "Me? I thought… well I assumed you'd want to give it…"
"I want to give it to you."
She caught his eyes for the millisecond he glanced at her and the air in the room felt all of a sudden heavy. Ron frowned as he resumed eating his crisps, the crackle of the bag the only other sound as Hermione mumbled a small `Ok' and placed the little mirror reverently back in her bag.
………………………………………………….
"Harry."
She spoke the name clearly at the little mirror, waiting as a grey mist swirled and eddied in the depths of the reflection.
After some time she saw a flash of green, and then an outline of untidy dark hair.
"Hi."
"Hey."
"Where are you? It's late."
"I'm at Luna's. I just… I wanted to…"
He smiled.
"It's okay."
"Where's Ginny?"
"She's in the next room."
"Right."
"It's really good to hear your voice."
Hermione closed her eyes to sudden unexpected tears.
"You too," she whispered.
………………………………………………………………..
"Ginny!"
Ginny turned to see Hermione running towards her and smiled as she caught up.
"Hi!" She kissed her future sister in law-as she'd come to think of her- on the cheek as she pulled up alongside, joining the queue for the lifts to the Ministry lobby.
"Just been to see Harry?"
"Yeah," said Ginny, smiling widely. "I wanted to make sure he knew to keep tomorrow free, we're going to do the family dinner for his birthday then."
Hermione frowned as they stepped forward together. "I can't believe Kingsley won't give you the night off tonight!"
Ginny made a face and then shrugged. "I know. But Shacklebolt said we could only have this meeting tonight-on the full moon- so the Seers would be at their best. Harry said he didn't mind…" Her voice trailed off. Why did she always feel she had to justify herself to Hermione? Over the years she'd begun to feel more intimidated by her, even though she felt Hermione had chilled out a lot since school.
It was silly- and Ginny could barely admit that it was maybe because with time, her friend had gotten more and more beautiful; she was one of those girls who had come into their prime in their twenties. Hermione didn't seem to have any idea though, that wizards would stop and stare as she walked past, that her muggle clothes that she mostly wore now as part of her job at Magical Law Enforcement seemed to hug her body the right way, the way that made men stop and appreciate.
Ginny shook out her long hair, her pride and joy. She made sure it was falling over her shoulders the way she liked it to. Glancing at Hermione who was waving out to a co-worker across the room she berated herself for her jealous thoughts. She made a decision.
"Hermione, you should see if Harry still wants to do anything tonight. Ron's made plans now and I hate to think he'll be sitting home alone on his actual birthday." She felt pleased with herself, her sudden generosity serving to balance out her previous thoughts.
Hermione looked at her, a little stunned, and then blinked.
"Sure Gin. I'll go back and ask him now." She squeezed Ginny in a brief hug.
"I'll see you tomorrow at the Burrow."
"Okay. And Hermione?" Ginny called out as Hermione walked away, turning to look back with her eyebrows raised in question. "Thanks."
Hermione affected a smile that only she knew was hesitant.
"Sure."
…………………….
Ron!"
"I don't wanna hear it Hermione! Don't bother lying to me!!!"
He stood, hands braced on the kitchen bench, focusing on his breathing as he tried to control himself. He looked up at her steadily and his glare made her flinch.
"I'm not stupid! I know that's what you were doing last night, talking to him on those bloody mirrors!!"
"It's not… I'm just talking to him Ron! I'm allowed to talk to Harry! He's my friend too you know."
"Ah Hermione give me some goddamn credit!!" He kicked at the cupboard in front of him violently, cracking the door panel. "I see you together! I'd be an idiot not to know!"
"Not to know WHAT Ronald? For Gods' sake - he's going out with your sister! And that's what it's like between us - he thinks of ME as a sister, you know that!"
Ron kicked another hole in the cupboard then wrenched it open, finally kicking it off his hinges. Hermione covered her face, waiting for him to stop. When he was still again she looked up from between her fingers. The next time he spoke, it was quietly, from between ragged breaths.
"Don't feed me that old line. I didn't buy it then and I don't buy it now."
He turned and stormed out of the kitchen and she listened for the front door to slam before sliding down the wall to bury her face in her knees.
………………………………………………………….
"Harry?"
Harry looked up to the soft rap on his office door. Hermione stood leaning in, smiling at him. He grinned back, and then had an immediate flash back to that afternoon, when she'd given him the mirror at lunch time. He'd thought of her a lot since then. More than he cared to admit.
"What are you doing tonight?" she asked. He gestured to the seat in front of his desk and she came in and flopped into it.
"Nothing. Just home." He noticed her lips seemed particularly red today. He didn't think she was wearing makeup though. Red? Where the hell was that thought coming from? He shook his head minutely. "Why?"
"I just spoke to Ginny and she said I should take you to do something. I thought maybe we could track down Hagrid, go and have a drink?"
Ordinarily he would've been delighted at the idea, two of his favourite people and a Firewhisky. Why was it filling him with a strange dread now? He pushed down the feeling and smiled.
"That sounds perfect."
…………………………………………………………
"Ginny?"
Harry walked through the rooms, sticking his head into every one briefly before moving to the next. "Are you here?"
"Out back!"
He headed towards the back room, knowing he would see her at the pottery wheel. Her arms were coated in the thick clay and she looked up at him and smiled as he approached.
"How was your day?" She stopped the wheel and turned to place her legs either side of his as she looked up at him.
He smiled and brushed a hair out of her eye, tucking it behind her ear.
"Fine. What do you want to do for dinner?"
"Maybe we should go out?"
"Yeah okay, I'll sort it." He bent and kissed her forehead then turned and walked out. His smile faded as he strode to the kitchen, ran a hand through his hair and leant against the table. Blowing out a long breath he swore, and muttered quietly to himself.
"I can't."
………………………………………………………
"`Ermione!"
Hagrid crushed her in a bear hug and she smiled into his wild hair as it covered her face.
"Hi Hagrid. It's so good to see you."
He set her back and moved on to give Harry the same treatment, knocking the wind out of him.
"Happy Birthday `Arry! Oh- look I bought you sumthin." He reached into his coat pocket and produced a large battered box. "I didn't sit on it this time." Harry opened it to find a slightly lopsided cake. Hagrid waved a huge hand in the air. "Though it might've `ad a bit of shakin up on the way…"
Harry grinned up at him. "It's perfect. Drink?"
Hagrid nodded enthusiastically and the three of them settled into the only booth at the Three Broomsticks that could fit Hagrid. Harry and Hermione knew that Madame Rosmerta had adjusted it accordingly for Hagrid as one of her favourite and most regular customers.
They ate and drank, sharing stories and memories late into the night. Harry glanced at his watch and was shocked to see how much time had passed but he smiled, genuinely happy to be in the company of these two. Hermione laughed at one of Hagrid's stories that he was telling through a strong bout of hiccups and Harry smiled fondly at her. She looked up, catching his eye and her smile faltered for a second before she returned it.
"Ah you two."
Hagrid looked weepy again for the umpteenth time that evening and Harry felt a stab of guilt, for not spending enough time with him lately. It was just that when he got time to spend with Ginny, she preferred to be alone, or just with Ron and Hermione. He realised then that he needed to see his old friends more.
"I always thought yer would get together ya know?"
His speech slurred from the drinks he'd been steadily knocking back but Harry had certainly caught his meaning. He cleared his throat and looked steadfastly up at Hagrid, ignoring Hermione in his peripheral vision. She however, seemed to be doing the same.
Hagrid's eyes widened momentarily and he looked around, as if expecting to see someone, perhaps Ron, or Ginny.
"Ah… I shouldna said that should I." He shrugged his huge shoulders then and glanced around; checking again that it was just the three of them. The liquor encouraged him to continue.
"But I do mean it. I've ne'er seen a relationship like yours. It's like you know each other's thoughts." He patted Hermione on her back, starting her coughing. "And you've always been the bonniest lass Mione."
Hermione blushed but shook her head, tucking her hair behind her ears. "Oh Hagrid, hardly. I know I was awkward - I didn't care. I don't need to be a great beauty to be happy." She trailed off and grabbed her drink, draining the rest of the wine in her glass. She stood abruptly.
"Another drink?"
"But you are though."
No one was more surprised than Harry when he spoke.
"Yer are what?" Hagrid frowned at Harry's comment and Harry found himself answering without his own knowledge again.
"Beautiful."
The word felt torn from him and he looked down at his hands in the silence that followed. Quickly he stood up.
"I'll get this round."
…………………………………………………………….
"Ron?"
"Uh, yeah sure that'll be good."
"Do you need to ask Hermione?"
He took his eyes off the TV to glance at Ginny's face in the embers of his fireplace. "Na, she won't be doing anything. Tell Mum we'll come."
The ember face cracked into a smile. "Great, Mum will be so happy. Harry can come now too - he thought he might have to work but I told him how important it is that he be at Shell Cottage for the anniversary. It'll be fun - all staying there together. Fleur is so looking forward to having us."
Ron grunted as Ginny went on, discussing the coming weekend. He frowned at the stray thought of Harry and Hermione sleeping in the cramped conditions of Shell Cottage, too close together for his liking. What was wrong with his thinking lately? Why would he even consider that?
It was the mirrors he thought. Those bloody mirrors - that Hermione had gone to so much trouble to find and fix, and then the fact that Harry wanted HIS girlfriend to have the other one. And then, that night, when they'd gone out together till late. What were they playing at?
Don't be stupid Ron, he thought to himself, shaking his head at his own admonishing. You've had these stupid thoughts before, and you just end up looking like a jealous tosser. Pack it in - they're like brother and sister. Of course they want to talk, to be in touch.
He looked over at Ginny, still talking in the fireplace. Maybe the lot of them all going away together would be just what they needed.
"Yeah Gin, it'll be fun."
……………………………………………………………………
"Ginny!!"
"What??!"
"What the hell did you do that for?
"What do you mean?"
Ron's angry face spat embers out of the fireplace and on to the hearth.
"Send them out together! Like a bloody date!!"
Ginny frowned angrily at her brother. "Oh for God's sake Ron! It's Harry! What's the problem?"
He pressed his lips together, obviously weighing his next words. "You didn't… you didn't see…"
"Didn't see what Ron?"
See them together today. With those mirrors. I can't get it out of my head. But his thoughts stayed inside as he placed his hands on the cold floor by the fireplace.
"Nothing Ginny, forget it." He pulled his head back from the fire, kneeling on the ground for some time after.
Ginny shook her head and went back to her book.
"Whatever Ron," she muttered.
………………………………………………….
"Harry."
He didn't turn around and stayed silent.
"Please talk to me."
"I can't… Hermione, please… leave me alone."
"I will if you want me to."
He turned then, taking in her appearance as she stood in the middle of the room, small and lonely. Her tanned skin was on show in her shorts and singlet, and the sleeves of her cable knit cardigan covered most of her hands as she fidgeted.
"You act like I've done something wrong."
He sighed, rubbed a hand over his face. "You haven't done anything."
"Then why are you avoiding me?"
He answered honestly.
"Because I have to."
She stepped closer, staring at her feet. He drew away from her as if she was a blazing fire too warm for his skin to bear.
"Don't. Please don't."
She nodded in response and bit her lip. Turning on her heel, she walked slowly from the room.
…………………………………………………..
"Ron?"
"No, he'll be asleep too Hagrid. Everyone has work tomorrow. Let's just call it a night."
Hagrid's bottom lip pushed out but he shrugged in final acceptance that the night was indeed over. He'd spent the last hour trying to convince Hermione and Harry that they should apparate to the Weasleys, see if anyone wanted to come out for drinks. All of them were a little worse for wear but a stumbling Hagrid had been hard to remove from the Three Broomsticks.
They started along the main road of Hogsmeade, walking Hagrid home though he protested.
"I'll be fine yer silly kids."
"We'll just walk you to the gates Hagrid, then apparate from there."
"Ah you two. Did I ever tell you that I always thought yer would get together?" He stopped suddenly and hiccupped. "I shouldna `ave said that."
Harry and Hermione both grinned this time, breaking into giggles and full laughter as they made their way through the village. Hagrid shrugged and kept on.
They stood at the gate for ages while Hagrid said his goodbyes for the sixth time - and again gave his thoughts on the two of them getting together. Shaking his head Harry ended up leaning all his weight into Hagrid's back and pushing him towards Hogwarts grounds, until Hagrid gave in laughing as he walked away. He took forever to walk out of sight - stopping and waving every few steps. Finally they stood alone and silent, their warm breath forming vapor clouds in the night.
"He's so funny."
"Yeah."
"We don't see enough of him now."
"I was just thinking the same thing."
Harry glanced sideways at Hermione, realising he'd just confirmed what Hagrid was saying earlier about them reading each other's thoughts. He shifted uncomfortably and shoved his hands in his pockets. She spoke first.
"So we better get home."
"Yeah."
"I think I might take the Knight Bus. Don't want to risk a splinching."
Harry turned and grinned at her. "Are you drunk, Miss Granger?"
She smiled back and then affected a slur and some stumbles. "I'm not ash think ash you drunk I am…."
He laughed and copied her, hiccupping down the street.
"Hic - Aah I shouldna `ave said that -hic". He mimicked Hagrid remarkably well and they laughed hard. Finally standing up straight he held his arm out for her to take.
"Come on then, let's go."
She looped an arm through his and together they walked away from the school gates.
……………………………………………
"Ginny."
"Is she awake?"
"She's just in the bathroom. Wait."
Harry whispered at the square mirror as he sat in the dark corner of the kitchen. Straining his ears he listened out for the running water, and Ginny's stumbling steps as she made her way back to the bedroom.
"She's gone."
"Are you sure? Will she wake up again?"
"No. She had nearly two bottles of wine tonight - she probably hasn't even noticed I'm not there."
"Oh. Okay."
He closed his eyes and leaned back into his chair. Shaking his head, he held the mirror up to his face again.
"Does he know you're still talking to me?"
Hermione closed her eyes momentarily too and he thought she might cry. But she opened them again and regarded him sadly.
"No. He thinks I've got rid of it. Like he asked me to."
Harry nodded ruefully.
"Right."
"I better let you go."
"Yeah. But Hermione…are you okay?"
He leaned forward on his knees and watched her face as she studied his.
She attempted a smile. "As okay as I ever am these days."
He nodded and smiled softly. He looked up suddenly at a noise from the bedroom, then back at the mirror after a moment.
"Harry…What about you? Are you okay?"
He shook his head sadly, and ran his thumb down the edge of the mirror.
"It's never okay now, Hermione."
………………………………………………….
"Harry?"
"Oh yeah sorry - you just hold your wand arm out…like this."
BANG.
A double-decker bus appeared from nowhere and careened towards them from the opposite side of the street.
Harry pulled Hermione back from the road just in time as the bus swayed precariously over the curb before screeching to a halt.
The doors opened with a hiss. Hermione felt a warm hand in hers and Harry was leading her up the stairs and on to the first crooked bed by the door.
The bus was empty aside from them but the conductor - an old stoutly man in a worn uniform, still blew his whistle long and loud to signal the bus (driven apparently by itself) to lurch off down the road again.
The arm around Hermione's waist tightened as Harry held on to both her and the bedpost in an effort to keep them steady. He wished she would say something - the silence between them seemed to solidify as they sat side by side, pressed close together.
He could think of nothing.
The bus rolled around a corner then, tipping onto two wheels. Hermione slid across the bed and was airborne in a second; he made a grab for her but only succeeded in being thrown himself and in his recovery, knocked his head hard against her lip.
She ended up crumpled in a corner at the next stop. Harry crawled towards her, his face creased in worry as she held her lip with both hands.
"Shit…. God, I'm so sorry."
She pulled her fingers away from her mouth to see the amount of scarlet blood there.
Harry got up on his knees and placed a hand on top of her head while lifting the bottom of his dark T shirt to press against the blood flow. She tried to pull back, attempting to protest at him using his shirt. But he already had it against her lip so she fell silent and still, looking up and away at the ceiling while he set about wiping the blood.
"Shit shit shit - that's a good cut." He sat back and surveyed his work, shaking his head and looking worried. "That might even leave a scar."
She looked up at him, her eyes seeming particularly dark. "It's okay Harry."
He returned her gaze, for a fraction too long. The conductor's whistle cut through the tension, Harry dropped to sit at her side.
"Safer on the floor maybe."
"I don't know if anywhere's safe in here."
Both were happy the bus pulled away then, cutting their conversation short.
………………………………………………………..
"Ron!"
Harry weaved through the crowd, dodging witches and wizards as they crowded towards the fireplaces of the Ministry, waiting their turns to floo. He was going against the tide and it was made more difficult by the amount people that still stopped to stare, to point and whisper about the Boy Who Lived as if he was deaf. He ignored them and kept his eyes on the red head walking away from him.
"Ron!!!" He called again, so loud that people next to Ron turned but the red head remained facing forward, walking in a straight line through the crowd in the lobby.
Harry frowned and pushed past people with more force now, wading through with determination. He reached Ron as he arrived at the queue for the phone box exit.
"Ron?" Harry grabbed his shoulder and attempted to turn him but Ron remained steadfastly facing the queue, as if Harry wasn't there.
"What the… talk to me!"
Ron turned and glared at Harry with a loathing that almost made him flinch.
"What do you want?"
Harry raised his eyebrows. "What do I want?" He lifted his arms in a shrug, his eyes searching the ceiling. "Oh I don't know… maybe a conversation with my best friend?"
People were starting to stare but Harry barely noticed, nose to nose with Ron as he was now.
Ron met his glare.
"Best friend? That's rich."
"What the fuck do you mean by that?"
"I mean some best friend that would be sleeping with my girlfriend behind my back."
Harry stepped back stunned. He glanced at the shocked faces turned to them now, then back at the angry mask of Ron's face.
He nodded as he backed away.
"Yeah, you would. You would think that."
………………………………………………………
"…Ron."
"I know. He's the person I least want to explain to as well. He's gonna think I beat you up." Harry grinned. "Hell, he's gonna beat ME up."
Hermione snorted. "As if. Don't worry- I'll do some healing charms on it or something, it'll be better by tomorrow."
They strolled down the dark street towards Hermione and Ron's flat.
"I think the light's on."
They both stopped and peered ahead, keeping silent. The silence continued as they stood there, seemingly waiting for something. A few drops of rain fell.
"You better get inside." Harry wasn't sure why he was whispering.
"Yeah." She whispered back. "Well, happy birthday, Harry." She looked up at him, with a slightly wooden smile. She reached up to his arm and patted it softly then looked to the ground. Stepping slowly away from him she was shocked to feel his fingers close around her wrist. She followed him automatically as he led her under a bus shelter.
The rain began to fall harder as he turned her to face him. She ventured a look up to find him staring at the ground, choosing his next words carefully. She studied his face as he wrestled with his thoughts.
"Listen, I…" He sighed and took both of her hands in his. She glanced around his shoulder at the yellow square of her top story window.
"I'm not good at…at saying how I feel." He met her eyes for a moment. "Especially with… with you. And I don't know why that is.
"But I had to tell you …that present…you getting those mirrors fixed…it means a lot." He cleared his throat, looking at the ground again. "So yeah. I just wanted to say that."
She smiled up at him. "You're welcome Harry. I'm glad you liked it. I was kinda worried you might be mad…" She trailed off, the noise from the rain getting louder on the clear roof above them. Harry studied a puddle as raindrops splashed messily into it.
"No. I was anything but mad."
"I'll call you then."
He looked in her eyes and smiled. Then his eye was drawn by the dried blood on her lip.
Instinctively he reached out to touch it.
…………………………………………………..
"Ginny…"
"Look, I know that Ron is an idiot sometimes. And I know he's had this issue with you guys for some time. I'm not accusing you Harry… but things were weird between you and Hermione at Shell Cottage."
"Yeah."
Ginny's stomach lurched as she watched Harry, staring at the ground. Finally he raised his head to look at her.
She looked so young still, exactly as she did at Hogwarts. He felt like the world's biggest prat every time he looked at her now. How could he tell her? He knew she thought they were going to get married. That's what any honourable guy would do, he scolded himself. Running a hand through his hair, he sighed.
"It's nothing Gin. She's just stressed at work and I've been helping her. Ron thinks all this stuff but… that's Ron y'know. He's always had those doubts about us."
Ginny smiled a little shakily. "I knew it was nothing."
He held out his arms to her and she walked into them. Kissing the top of her head he stared off into the distance.
"I never want to hurt you Ginny."
"Then don't." She tried and failed to sound lighthearted.
She looked up to him and he kissed her on the nose. Then he released her, smiled weakly and walked away.
She bit her nails as she watched him go.
………………………………………………………….
"Harry."
She breathed out his name in a whisper that he didn't hear over the rain.
His finger brushed the cut lightly. He blew a slow exhale out through his nose as he left the fingertip there for a second, and then ran it along her bottom lip, all the way across and back. She noticed a muscle flex in his jaw.
She took in a sharp breath and let it out shakily. She watched his eyes but they were fixed on his own finger. Then he spoke.
"Sorry…again. About that."
She nodded - speech deserting her for the moment. She expected him to take his finger away any second now, until he moved his thumb to her lip next, his fingers lightly holding her jaw.
She moved into him fractionally and his eyes widened for a moment, catching hers.
…………………………………………….
"Hermione."
She sighed, fed up.
"What, Ron."
"You haven't answered my question."
"That's because it's ridiculous Ron."
"Don't try and dance around it. Just answer me."
She finally looked up from her plate, dropping her knife and fork with a clatter into her half eaten food.
"Yes. I. Have. I said, Nothing. I can't believe you're on about this again. I thought we sorted this last week."
"Everyone could see it. Even Ginny asked if you and Harry had had an argument. You guys were strange with each other." He pushed away from the table and folded his arms. "I want to know."
Hermione repeated his actions, pushing back herself but standing up. She glared down at him for a moment, then turned and stalked off down the hall. Reaching the front door she grabbed her cloak, swirling it in a circle around her to rest on her shoulders.
"No you don't Ron," she said under her breath as she opened the door to leave. "You don't want to know."
…………………………………………………………..
"Hermione."
He seemed to break some tension with her name.
"I… you better go."
His words echoed in the shelter. They shared a few more breaths then he leaned down to her, pressed his lips chastely against her cheek. He could smell her hair, slightly damp now. She closed her eyes.
Carefully, he took a step back.
Opening her eyes again she looked at him in front of her, vaguely realising her fists were clenched at her sides.
"Okay. Thanks. I had a nice time."
"So did I. Thanks for taking me out."
"I'll see you tomorrow."
"Yeah, okay, I'll see you then."
A deep breath and then she went to step out into the rain. He stopped her, his hand shooting out to grasp her arm.
She looked back and he was staring down at her, his expression unreadable.
"Wait. Take this."
He started to shrug out of his jacket.
"No... no Harry it's just over there…"
But he was already laying it around her shoulders, pulling up the hood over her hair. His hands pulled the hood forward on each side and he smiled at her small face framed by the jacket now.
"I can't send you home bloodied AND soaked to the skin. Ron would never forgive me." His smile faltered on his last words.
Hermione's voice was very small. "No, I suppose not."
She threaded her arms into the jacket and then looked up at him, struck by how green his eyes seemed in the low streetlight.
"Will you be okay?"
He nodded. "I'm alright to apparate now. I've sobered up." He looked down at the ground quickly, as if he'd just shared too much.
"Well, okay then. I'll see you."
"Bye."
She hurried out into the rain. He stood there and watched her until she made it to the door and turned around, her silhouette framed by the light from her hallway. She raised a hand to wave, her fingers only just visible over the sleeve of his jacket.
He raised a hand back and waited for her to close the door, before stepping out from under the shelter to walk home in the rain.
……………………………………………
"Hermione."
She turned suddenly in fright. Hugging herself and wrapped in her woolen cardigan, she was still freezing in the cliff top winds. She was shocked he was here, that he had got so close to her without her hearing him. She attempted a smile but failed, turning instead back to the view of the dark ocean.
His fingertips on her shoulders felt like they were burning through the wool and into her skin as he reached out to touch her. She attempted to pull away, but his hands were already cupping her shoulders, pulling her back and around to face him.
She stared down fixedly at his t shirt, the outline of his chest just inches from her face.
"You're freezing."
He hadn't let go of her, and the thought ran through her mind that the warmth generated by his hands was certainly doing its part to warm her up. She felt paralyzed, frozen indeed, in a moment in time.
"Please come back inside."
His green stare penetrated her and with the help of the wind she swayed into him. He reflexively grabbed her in to steady her, the whole of their bodies in line now and pressing into each other. She noticed his breathing, shallow and quick, matching hers.
With burning shame she tilted her face up to him and he looked down at her, frowning, his lips slightly parted. One hand was on her shoulder, the other on her back. She knew he was hovering between holding her there and setting her away, and she knew either way she wouldn't be able to resist.
He lowered his face to hers, painfully slow. So close that their lips were just barely touching.
"Stop me," he whispered.
Her mouth was so dry and she licked her lips, accidentally grazing his with her tongue. Her eyes traveled up to lock with his.
"No I can't."
He closed his eyes for a second and then he lowered his chin, staying close but breaking the contact of their lips. She could smell his hair and she closed her eyes also as he moved his cheek to hers, resting their faces together.
His whispered voice was only inches from her ear.
"Go inside. Please."
She smiled then, a sad broken smile and rested her forehead on his chest.
She stayed there a moment longer, feeling his heart beat while the wind whipped around them. She looked off into the distance to the white cottage behind him, thinking of all the sleeping bodies of their loved ones inside.
Without another word she stepped past him, leaving him staring out to the night sea.
She didn't look back.
…………………………………………………….
"Ron?"
She had been standing, her back against the door. Leaning against it for support she admitted. It had been all of a sudden difficult to stand.
She had listened to the stillness of the house, a distant roll of thunder and the sound of the wind getting stronger. Turning then, she cupped her hands around her eyes to peer through the coloured rectangle of glass set into the door, and saw by the light of the streetlamp that the bus shelter was empty now.
Slowly she turned her hands to grasp each side of the hood still over her head. She felt the warm lining of the jacket with her fingertips, her knuckles grazing her cheeks as she pulled it close about her face. Staring off into the night she moved her hands further down to the neck of the coat and then lowered her chin until her nose was hidden in it.
She breathed in deeply, and closed her eyes. Her forehead rested on the cool glass as she drank in the smell of the jacket.
Then she heard the tapping.
Something solid tapping lightly on wood.
She turned to the noise, straining her eyes to see into the dark front room.
Vaguely she detected a bulky outline in the corner.
"Ron?"
With a sharp click, orbs of light flew across the room from him to every light and lamp.
"Nice night?"
"Wh…uh yeah, it was great. What are you doing up?"
"Oh, I don't know." He turned the silver deluminator over in his long fingers against the wooden armrest and she realised this had been the tapping sound. "I guess I just wanted to see if my girlfriend would actually make it home or not."
Hermione frowned, and stepped into the room. She couldn't help herself turning her head to glance out of the front window, checking, she knew, to see if he had a view of the bus shelter. He didn't.
"Of course I'd make it home. What's that supposed to mean?"
Ron remained silent, glaring at her.
"Ron, I was out with Hagrid and Harry." Still no response. She turned away from him. "I'm going to bed."
"Hermione."
She paused at the door, scowling back at him.
"Nice jacket."
……………………………………………………….
"Harry."
Harry looked up at his office door to see Ron's lanky frame braced against the door jamb. His arms were folded defensively, but his expression was sheepish.
Watching him closely, Harry stood up and then gestured to a seat. Ron stepped into the room but remained standing.
"So… I thought I'd tell you… She's gone."
"What?"
"Hermione."
"Gone where?"
"Australia."
"Why? For how long?" A strong sense of foreboding gripped him and he placed his fingers on his desk to brace himself.
"Forever."
Harry blinked. "What do you mean?"
"I mean she's left me, she's left all her friends, she's left you. She said she didn't want any big fuss." He looked down at his feet, kicking at the ground. "So I guess I owe you an apology."
At that Harry snapped out of his stupor and shook his head to clear it.
"What for?"
"For being an asshole. For treating you like shit. I know it was me that drove her away. I was trying to blame you."
Harry's mouth opened but nothing came out.
"So, we've established I'm a knobhead. Wanna go for a beer?"
His thoughts flew to the little mirror he wished he had on him now. He looked at Ron.
"Sure."
…………………………………………………..
"Ginny!"
"You look so well sweetheart... you're glowing! No news to tell us, have you..?"
Molly Weasley wrapped her youngest in a warm hug and winked at Harry. He tried not to let his smile turn into a grimace and raised his eyebrows at her before moving in to hug her tight.
"Happy Birthday Harry!" Arthur Weasley moved in to give Harry a back slapping hug.
The Butterbeer began to flow as George and Alicia arrived, followed by Bill and Fleur and then Andromeda and Teddy. Harry busied himself playing with the little toddler, wrestling with him in the middle of the lounge room.
He didn't notice the door opening until Hermione was standing fully in the room. He stopped and looked up at her from where he was sitting on the floor and she stood there mutely. Over her shoulder he saw Ron enter the room and then just as quickly leave again. He frowned and glanced back at Hermione who was still staring at him, and still hadn't said a word.
"Wodjaaaa!" A flash of blue hair in the corner of his eye warned him of Teddy's approach and he turned just in time to catch the boy as he launched at Harry, knocking him onto his back. Harry's t shirt came up with Teddy's legs and he could feel the air on his bare skin.
Hermione looked down at them, her eyes drawn to his exposed stomach. Hastily she held her arm out to him and caught his eyes again.
"Here's your jacket. Thanks for that."
He reached up to grab it, noticing Ginny come in the room with a tray of drinks at that moment.
"No problem."
They gathered in the dining room soon after, all taking their seats noisily. Harry had to step past Hermione to get to his seat, using considerable effort not to touch her. Ron hadn't spoken or even looked at him yet and Harry frowned in his direction.
"Haaaaaappy Birthday to yoooooou," Molly warbled, as she approached him, barely visible behind a huge cake with hundreds of candles on it. He smiled as they finished singing and Molly placed the cake in front of him. He grabbed Teddy out of his high chair to help him blow out the candles.
"1, 2, 3!!"
"What did you wish for, Harry?"
George's question took him by surprise and he cursed himself as his eyes slid to Hermione. She bit her lip and looked down and he looked hastily at his plate.
Sometimes I wish she was you.
"A new broom," he said quickly, knowing that Ginny had brought him one as a surprise that he would open after dinner. Ginny smiled warmly and pressed herself against his arm. Ron watched the two of them closely, as Harry turned to kiss her.
Hermione kept her stare down, and stabbed some food on her plate.
---------------------------end of part one
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