AN: Hi it's Nym13. Here is the last chapter, thank you so much for reading this and giving me a chance. Thank you!
Disclaimer: I Don't Own Harry Potter.
XXX
There's this airy presence inside of me…
I feel as though I'm floating through the clouds…
I play in a lush forest…
There's always a sunny sky hanging over my head…
And the translucent sunlight makes all the gold I posses glitter like diamonds...
I knew from the beginning that I have everything in this world…
And it has always been certain…
I have found a home in it…
Over time I've grown to accept that I will never want for anything, until one day it happened…
She happened…
XXX
I could not sleep.
I think I need to amend that statement.
I do not sleep, at least, not anymore.
As I restlessly try to snuggle and get comfortable under my covers, I have realized that just like the countless nights that have passed, sleep will not visit me tonight. I still lay awake, enveloped by darkness and shielded by my drapes from the outside world. Compared to the night that is silent despite that of my roommates' heavy breathings, I am filled with an eternal turmoil as my thoughts are so pronounced that inside my head it is so loud that I want nothing more than to escape the noise that plagues me.
Ron sleeps soundly in his bed, and it makes me annoyed, for over the past few weeks he had been pushing me to the edge that I'm almost at my breaking point. It's funny he claims that I have grown indifferent and often asks me how I could easily brush and ignore things. He doesn't understand how I feel. He doesn't see the bags under my eyes. He doesn't know that every night after he turns in I grab the mirror and keep it under my pillow.
He asks me how I could remain so calm, so unsympathetic. He asks me if I could sleep well at night knowing I'm hurting someone. I don't tell him that I don't sleep. I can't tell him the truth.
Just like all the sleepless nights before, I finally succumb to the temptation and hastily pulled out the mirror from the comforts of my pillow. The glass is cold to my touch, this I noticed, as I've always had. Just like her. Often times I wonder how in her icy grasps I manage to feel warmth's soft embrace.
Why do people torment themselves by wanting things they cannot have? Is it human nature? Or is it human weakness?
Thus are questions I have no time to answer.
I never knew that making a wish for someone could make one selfish, not until now...
I truly did not wish for my feelings to go astray. I wasn't careful, I've always been reckless that I know of, but I never knew I was a masochist.
I started to see her in a different light on my fourteenth birthday. Dad, Sirius, and Remus gave me a talk. A talk about becoming a man, and falling in love. I felt like such a girl during that time, I didn't know what pushed me to ask such a bloody stupid question.
'How do you know if you love someone, dad?' my own idiocy still rings in my ears.
Stupid, stupid! Sometimes I wonder why I had not inherited the rational and tactful qualities that my mother possessed, I'm too much of my father's son I suppose.
Dad at that time just gave me this weird smile as if he was about to cast a really powerful patronus and Sirius and Remus just rolled their eyes as if they were trying not to break into laughs as well.
'Well son, you know you're in love when that person changes you for the better. I'm sure you might have heard people telling you that from the start that they knew your Mum and I would end up together since we've always bickered like an old married couple. As much as I would like to claim that they're right, your Mum would have rolled her eyes and scoffed.'
'Why is that dad?'
'Your Mum never liked me. I was a marauder, prankster, and an all around git. I was selfish, all I cared about was having fun and getting my way, I spared no one the time of the day and I did not care if I was hurting anybody. Your Mum hated me for all the right reasons. Though I was never truly mean to her, for from the beginning I already fancied her, that did not mean I was in good spirits with her. Then on our seventh year I was head boy along with her. She used to insult me a lot and saying I did not deserve the title given to me. At first I brushed her off but then later on I figured that she was right. I was truly a git. I was popular but then I wondered if I truly did want to leave Hogwarts known as the marauder who was a bully. I realized that I did not want that. I wanted to be someone that Hogwarts would be proud of, my parents would be proud of, my friends would be proud of, Lily would be proud of, the person that I would be proud of. So I changed. And when I did, Lily finally gave me a chance.'
'Now I have always fancied your mother but I realized I was in love with her when from enemies we became friends. She was someone I could talk to. She was frank with me, she always manages to put me in my place but at the same time she was also sensitive and took care to not really hurt me. She was such a good person that she challenges me to be worthy of her. It was hard, and what started out as such a heavy task of trying to be worthy of your mother turned into something I could actually love doing. I actually started to like being the good guy. People would tell you I liked your mother because she was pretty and smart. Not that those aren't true but those are just the things that made me fancy her. I love her for she made me into a better person, I love that she scolds me when I hurt myself but at the same time she heals my wounds, I love that she always worries about me when I'm on a mission and yet she never told me stop. I love that she sticks up for what she believes in and never backs down. I love that she trusts me completely, that she can be my friend, that she believes in me even if no one would, I love that she never gave up on me even if there were times that I would have, and that despite everything that I have done in the past she had forgiven me and had love me back. But most of all, I love her for making all my dreams come true and for bringing you into this world.'
'Jeez Prongs, you sure still sound like a love struck pup after all this time.' Uncle Sirius had interrupted and then we have begun laughing after that and talked about other things.
But what my dad said had kept stuck in my head. I wasn't romantic, this I know of, or not until recently, but I wanted what my parents had. It may not be soon but I was willing to wait for it. I started to doubt if I would ever find that love, that kind of love that after years of being together I would still seem like a love struck pup. Did such a girl exist for me? My dad was lucky, my Mum was the best, but was the fates as kind to me?
That I did not know. And I begin to wonder if such a perfect girl did exist. Someone who would not just make me feel lust but also love.
I thought that there would never be such a perfect girl, something so genuine and pure could not exist in such an imperfect world. Where could I find a girl that even came close to my mother? Ha, how wrong that statement sounds.
But fate always did have a funny way of granting your wishes. For I've met her. She was not the perfect girl, but she was perfect for me.
She was pretty, but not stunningly beautiful.
She was brilliant, smart and witty. She fights for what she believes in and never backs down.
She was always there. She always helps me in whatever way she can. She looks after me. She never doubts me. She always encourages me to do my best and to pursue my dreams. She listens to me. She makes me happy.
She's my best friend.
But…
She nags. She's annoying when she always wants to know everything. She's always too serious. She hates when Ron and I try to be daring. She hates that we don't even bother reading Hogwarts A History or get why she's so adamant about us doing well in school. She worries too much about us. And she's so proper almost prudish.
And then…
She becomes prettier every year and she doesn't even know it. She's so smart that she has become my voice of reason and I always turn to her when I need something. She's so bloody cute when she gets all worked up when she and Ron get into arguments and as she tries to defend her stand. She has always been there, that it's hard for me to imagine a day when she won't. She helps me in whatever way she can that I'm afraid I'll grow dependent on her. She looks after me and I love knowing that I have her to fuss over me. She never doubts or questions me and she makes me more confident in myself. She believes I would do great things that I start believing in me too. She always listens to me to the point that I feel guilty on venting all my frustrations upon her, and she listens to me talk about Quidditch despite her not really understanding my enthusiasm for the sport. She makes me happy because I'm lucky enough to call her my best friend.
She nags and she's annoying but that's just how she cares. She's always too serious for I am not. She hates when I try to be daring and show off my manly bravado for she's afraid that I might hurt myself and she won't be able to help. She doesn't like that we slack off in class for she believes that we have potential to do better. She worries too much but that's because she's so caring and loving and she only has us to shower with her affections. She's so proper and prudish that I wouldn't dream of staining her innocence, instead she makes me want to protect her even more.
She's definitely not perfect, but she's perfect for me. I finally found someone I knew I could grow to love but then fate had to be so cruel and make her unattainable.
She was not for me, neither was she free for anybody.
I started to curse the heavens for being too cruel to her. She was a kind hearted girl who did not deserve to be stuck as a ghost. I had the luxury to love anyone, even to love her, for it was only human to love. But she will never have that option. She was a ghost. As much as it hurts me to know I can't be with the person I love, I could chose to not love her too and love someone else. But she will never know love and what's worse; I know she will feel that love is not for her.
I tried to fight it at first and tried to convince myself it's just a passing fancy. I went on laughing whenever I was with her and Ron. She always remained my friend, and I was determined to keep us just platonic friends. But then she'd be so feminine in my eyes, almost like a seductress subtly tugging at my heart thus letting my guard down and would lead me to say and do things to her a platonic friend wouldn't. But Ron doesn't notice, she doesn't notice; only I did.
I was the only one aware of the change of my feelings for her. I got tired of fighting it. I started thinking maybe I could love her. Maybe she'd allow herself to love me too. Maybe we could try it. I was foolish; it was a love story that should never begin.
Then Ginny came into the equation. I thought she was the answer to my dilemma. After all, it didn't seem that Nemo felt anything towards me other than friendship. It looked that my love was one sided. There has always been a saying 'if a bird loved a fish where would they live?' I never once got that quote, I always thought it was stupid…but I was stupid. I am the bird that loves a fish.
Ginny was easy. She already liked me. I liked her too. But she just wasn't her. I tried to love her, I really did, after all, she was a great girl and it was unfair for her if I cannot love her just because I've fallen in love with a ghost; someone who didn't even belong to the world I lived in.
There were moments when I was almost convinced that I could do it. Her hand was warm whenever I held it as we walked side by side. Nemo's hands were cold and I could not touch them, she was elusive like the cool wind. Ginny would blush and her lips would redden whenever she smiled, those things heightened her beauty and sometimes she would take my breath away. Nemo was just pale…there was no color to her complexion, she was dull. Those were moments when I thought I could love Ginny. And then we would kiss…
From a small peck it would transcend into a more passionate one. I would pull her closer to me and feel the warmth of her body against mine as she wraps her arms around my neck and respond to my kiss fervently. Her love for me was real, she was real. I would moan in approval for she was a fantastic kisser. I almost believed I could love her but then when the kisses become more heated I would reach out to her attempting to draw her closer. My hand would snake at the back of her neck grabbing a handful of her hair and then I would freeze…
When I feel her soft, silky and straight hair wrapped around my fingers I just stop.
In those moments I realized that I wanted so much to believe I could love her. It made me realized that I had been pretending. I was pretending and wishing I could kiss Nemo like I was kissing Ginny. I did not know that it was her face I was seeing and imagining kissing, not until I've touched Ginny's hair. It's as if reality had crashed upon me, in those times I realized that I was expecting to touch curly brown hair instead of flaming red straight ones the Ginny had. It was definitely true that we can never chose the ones we love and once we've given up our hearts it would be so hard to give someone new your love while the former still possessed it.
I just needed to touch Ginny's hair and just like that my urges and need for her would end. That's how I knew the painful difference between lust and love.
I begun to feel bad, Ginny deserved someone better than me. Someone that could love her. She should not be made to suffer and pin after me. No one should be anyone's last resort when she so clearly deserves to be someone's first. It's so bad that I could not love her the way she loves me. I was a bad person this I established.
Ginny and I did not last. I knew we would never. I wasn't the one who ended things between us since I did not want to hurt her. I was grateful that it was her who made the step to break things off. We're friends now and it's better this way, it has always been better this way.
Ginny's dating other people now; it's nice that she's finally moving on, giving chances to other blokes who would treat her like a Queen. Ron is getting worried and always fussing about his sister being too young to date. They make me laugh by how much they argue now a days. It makes me remember about the times Nemo and Ron would argue, and then I'm reminded of her again until my thoughts are plague with images of her and no one else.
It's clear that my feelings for her won't be going away any time soon. So I decided to do something about it.
I would not try to fight it, for it always won despite my efforts.
I won't try to love other people; they'll end up hurt like Ginny.
I would try to find a way to make us happen. And to do this…
I researched a lot. I went to the library looking up facts about ghosts and other magical creatures. I doubt she was a true ghost. She had qualities same to that as ghosts, but she also possessed traits not found in them.
I interviewed the Hogwarts ghost just to find more information. I grew more and more frustrated everyday as I've found nothing new to help me.
I grew so depressed that Ron and Ginny started noticing the changes in me, despite how hard I tried to hide them. I didn't want them to know and be worried about me. My problem wasn't their own I won't share my burden with them. And I don't want to deal with their pitying looks and reprimands. They'll tell me it's useless and that I should move one, they'll try to reason with me and try to convince me what a pointless endeavour I have taken up. I wouldn't want to hear it, because I know they're right, but despite this, I will continue foolishly torturing myself. At the back of my mind I can't seem to kill the hope that there might be a future for Nemo and me.
I would come back to the Gryffindor dormitory late at night. Often times I contemplated if I should talk to Nemo or not. Probably she was already asleep that I would tell myself, but I knew it was only an excuse. I wouldn't want to talk to her for I always did feel guilty, I feel as though I have disappointed her with me not finding anything useful to free her. I know she wouldn't know, but still that's what I feel. I also didn't want to talk to her for I might say and do things I'll regret. She wouldn't deserve my misplaced anger. I might grow angry at her and blame her being a ghost and making me feel this way and in turn turning my once perfect life into something so miserable. I might shout at her and tell her she's such a terrible being for making me suffer. I might tell her I wish I never would have met her and mean it. That's what I'm afraid of the most…
Because I do think that if I hadn't, then I wouldn't have subjected myself into a world of so much hurt, anger, and frustration. She was the catalyst in my life. I have no doubt that I could say that to her. So I stayed away.
She wouldn't deserve it, it's not like she chose to be that way. She was a kind hearted girl almost faultless. There was no reason for me to be angry at her, someone who was so much of a better person than I was given the punishment of not being able to exist and make a difference in this world. Her only fault was that she wasn't human, such a shame, and what a waste, when there are so many others who recklessly waste away their lives.
It wasn't her fault that she was a ghost, just as much as it wasn't my fault to have fallen in love with her. With this thought, I hope one day I would be able to forgive myself for loving her.
I got tired of pretending that I was alright. The façade of showing up smiling and laughing with my friends was taking its toll on me. I was tired of acting. I found solace in being alone where I could be free to drown in my sadness, there I could be free to shed a tear with no one watching. My loneness was so much more comforting.
I began sketching her face whenever I would sit there by the lake. Every time I pause it's her face I see, her image is vivid in my head, that I'd like to believe I could actually draw her. I tried to draw her in the way that will give justice to what I feel for her. I would be drawing her and attempting to give life to her in my sketches. I would try to picture her having some color to her cheeks, her lips red and I would imagine her brown eyes glistening and her brown curly hair splashed by sunlight. There was a time when Dean saw my drawings mistaking my sketch pad as his. He asked me who she was; I then shrugged and said that it was just a girl I saw in my dreams. Dean who was the resident artist just nodded and say that I drew really well, I would then tell him to not speak of it to anyone, and he had kept his word.
I've been living like this for a few weeks now, and I'm tired and worn out of hiding. I know now what I must do and that I should tell her how I feel. She deserves to know and I deserve to be free. It's time I stop dancing around and avoiding the inevitable, it's time I face my fears.
As I feel sleep finally settling inside me, I welcome it with open arms because in my dreams I am free to be with her. In my dreams no can tell me that I shouldn't love her. My eyes slowly closes and the last thought in my head was…
Just one more week and I will be coming home.
XXX
"Harry!" I heard my Mum call out to me as I saw her hand flying in mid-air and attempting to catch my attention. I turned to Ron and Ginny and said my goodbyes.
"See you tomorrow Ron." I told Ron as he nodded to me and left with Ginny. Ever since we started Hogwarts Ron and his family would visit our house and have lunch with us, a day after our arrival. Then Ron and I would bring out our flying brooms and excuse ourselves to go to the forest of Dean and meet with Nemo.
My parents never question us anymore for they have grown accustomed to it. Then Ron would stay for a week with us and I would stay a week at the burrow. We always had dinners at each other's places during the summer break and sometimes the Weaselys would stay with us for we are living in a Muggle community and Mr. Arthur Weasley has always been fascinated with the Muggle world. I am thankful that Ron gets to visit me all the time. Not only do I feel happy since their presence did not make me feel like an only child but also because I know Nemo's happier when she sees Ron and I visiting her.
Sometimes I wonder how lonely she has been all those years.
"Hey Mum!" I greeted my mum as I gladly returned the bone crushing hug she's given me.
"My, Harry you've grown taller!"
"Well I do need to follow my dad's footsteps." I told her grinning and she pinched my nose lovingly.
"Oh, hush Harry, you're a much better man than your dad was at this age. Your dad took a long time to become a real gentleman."
"I know, dad says the same thing." I told her grinning and my Mum just smiled at me.
"So where's dad?"
"Remus, Sirius and he had an Auror meeting today so he won't be back till dinner. Now hand me Hedwig and you go push your trolley." Mum commanded as I handed her Hedwig. I used to remember arguing with Mum and telling her that I could just place Hedwig in my cart as I push my trolley but Mum would have none of that. She said that she could just carry Hedwig and lessen my load. Then I would tell her how disrespectful it would be for me to make my mother carry my load and for some odd reason she would give me a lecture about feminism. I learned to not argue with her anymore.
But Mum has always been caring…and even if others would be embarrassed if their mother's treated them the way my Mum was treating me, I just remind myself of how lucky I am to have a mother that loves me.
When we arrived at home the house still looked the same. Except for the small bookshelf at the corner as it seemed to always have more books each time I arrive home. We already have a big library upstairs the small bookshelf in the living room is for the new books mum buys so she gets to read them before she moves them into the library upstairs.
The house still looked pristine, there was no new furniture and the aroma of freshly bake garlic bread filled the area. Home was still home, nothing's change, but it feels as if everything has shifted, somehow something did, for something always does.
"Harry bring your trunk upstairs. I've prepared pasta, chicken and garlic bread for dinner, and pumpkin pie for dessert."
"Hmm, sounds sinful." I grinned at my mother as I grabbed my trunk and hurried to our stairs.
"I know that you never cared much for fancy food." Mum rolled her eyes at me as she went in the kitchen and started setting dinner.
"Yeah, you know us men, we like food that's easy to eat and we don't really fancy eating food we can't be bothered to pronounce right." I told my mum jokingly before hurriedly dashing up the stair. I settled my trunk beside my bed and I let myself fall on top my clean bed. I looked up at the ceiling of my room. Much like the enchanted ceiling of Hogwarts; mine shone of bright silvery stars against cold blue hues. I liked looking at my enchanted ceiling, it made me feel as though I was flying.
When we moved here, I didn't really want to. Mum had insisted, she was so adamant about us moving into this quiet town, with a few but clearly well off neighbours. She wanted to stay in this three storey with an attic, blue Victorian house. She said it was not too large but not to small either. Plus she says, the rose garden was beautiful. Dad then teased mum that she should have been named Rose instead of Lily, since she was fiery and as beautiful as that of a red English rose. Mum blushed at that, but then swatted my dad on the head when he added that she could be quite thorny and prickly as one too.
I never really understood why we had to leave the magical world, leave Godrics Hallow, and leave Potter Manor. The wizarding world was where we belonged. In there were all my friends, in there were all their friends, they had jobs there too, and they had to floo, fly or apparatte there almost every day, well mum never did fly, but still. It was such a hassle if you think about it, living here so far away from our world.
I just accepted it at that time. I grew to enjoy it here too since I met Nemo. But now I understand. Mum was muggleborn, despite everything, even now that she's an important person in the wizarding world she still considers herself a muggleborn witch, and even if she married a pureblood that held no prejudice against muggleborns she was still aware of how others would turn their noses and look the other way for wizards and witches like her. She didn't want me to grow up a pompous git like Draco Malfoy. She wanted me to have this. Her childhood of living a double life.
When I come home mum makes me do chores without magic, so does she. Some of our furniture are magical but not all, most magical stuff are just bookshelves, drawers and our closet that are magically expanded to fit all our things. The floo conection and floo powder, my dad and my brooms, and a pantry full of ingredients for mum's potion making. But other than those things, our house is practically a muggle one. Mum cooks with an oven, she vacuums the house, we take turns washing the dishes, we have laundry day, and we use electricity and dad has taken a liking to the television, plus we have a heater instead of heating charms. But above everything else, mum taught me to tend the garden.
There are no garden gnomes or magical plants in our garden, just a backyard full of roses. I remember what she told me during our first lesson…
"Harry, you know I'm named Lily and your Aunt was named Petunia."
"Yeah…"
"Well, those are beautiful flowers are they not? My parents always thought we should be named after flowers since even after centuries have passed flowers and plants never change but they still look beautiful after all those time, are they not?"
"I suppose, but unlike magical flowers they die easily don't they, and they're not as interesting."
"Well not if they're well taken care of and still planted on the ground…they happen to be really lovely."
"Huh?"
"Oh Harry, Listen…magical flowers they're beautiful and it's true they live longer and are more interesting than typical flowers but, can't you see there's beauty in simplicity? And in the magical world they always teach us that everything is possible and that might have been the reason for everyone's pigheadedness. There, everything is instant and easy. If you break a cup you can just 'Reparo' it and it's done, no consequences. There flowers are the same, you can just leave them be and they'll grow beautifully, or you can pluck them and cast an everlasting charm and they will never wilt. But that doesn't teach you anything good does it?"
"I still don't understand."
" Harry…you see flowers symbolize a lot of thing, good things like, happiness, blessings, love…and even bad ones. These muggle plants teach us that if we do it right they might live forever and grow beautifully. They teach you to care, persevere and endure all hardship and to just keep on doing your best because one day it may all go wrong. But magical plants, they teach wizards to depend on them and neglect them because they can just stay fresh forever and they need no special attention they could just flick their wands and those flowers would just be beautiful. But Harry life is not like that, not here in the muggle world and certainly not there in the magical world. I remember I once broke a china, mum wouldn't let me cast a simple 'reparo' on it, she said something precious that had been broken should not be that easy to fix. I cried as I picked up the pieces the shards leaving scars and blood, but you know what that taught me a lesson I'll never forget…. Do you understand?"
"Yes mum, I do."
"Good boy."
I still remember that conversation for it was in that conversation that I was proud to be a halfblood and proud of my mother for she had the perspective of two; while many only had one. She has taught me so much about being open-minded, brave and to endure all hardships. Even my wounds when I fell were healed by plasters and not by magical potions and spells. She taught me to not be afraid of scars for they were reminders of what we went through and that we survived it. A person without scars is fragile, is what she says.
I am who I am today because I am both from magical and Muggle descents. I might not become great but I will endure better than most, my parents made sure of that. For their nurture, care and training I am thankful, I know I will need it. If I am to be happy I should stay strong, if I am to reach my goal I should be patient and if I should fall I must learn to endure the pain for my dream, my one wish, to love Nemo would require that of me.
"Harry! What's taking you so long? Dinner would be cold if you don't come down here this instant!"
XXX
"Ron!" I rushed forward and hugged my best friend tightly as he stepped out of the fire place. I could not help the grin that spread like wildfire across my face and I was sure it was leaving pink tinges on my cheeks. I was happy he was finally here, it seemed like I was waiting forever for him to arrive. I could not wait anymore to go the forest and see Nemo. It seemed like I had summoned all of my Gryffindor bravery today and I could not help but feel a certain adrenaline rush propelling me to do it now, lest I lose my wit if I shall wait a moment longer.
"Blimey mate, it's good to finally see you after all this time, how long has it been?" Ron had asked me teasingly as he grinned at me as well. I rolled my eyes at him but before I could reply Ginny had beaten me to it.
"It's been less than twenty four hours, and you two could not be kept away from each other. Wait till the whole family hears about you two getting together, oh it won't be a surprise." Ginny had playfully added as she winked at the both of us.
"Oi, you're just jealous because it didn't work out between you two." Ron had proclaimed as he hugged me and stuck his tongue out at Ginny.
"Gross Ron! Disgusting, where's your manly pride?" I exclaimed as I pushed him off of me. The three of us just laughed and joked some more as more of the Weasley clan poured in.
"Hey mum, Ron and I are just going to fly for a bit, just summon us if it's time for lunch."
"Boys and their brooms." Mum rolled her eyes at us but her tone wasn't condemning rather it was her way of showing us that she understood.
"Well alright, but be careful and the two of you don't go into trouble." Mum had reminded me like she always does.
"Thanks." I kissed her cheek as Ron and I hurriedly fetched brooms from my broom closet. As we stepped out of the room we saw Ginny waiting for us.
"Hi!" She greeted us.
"Oh, hello, do you need something Gin?"
"The two of you are going to go see her aren't you?"
"Yes, we are." Ron had answered. Ginny bit her lower lip nervously as she hastily tucked a tendril of her long and straight red hair.
"Well, if it's not much trouble I'd like to come with you. I know her now, and I really want to meet her." Ginny looked really sincere when she said those words I could tell she really did want to come with us and meet Nemo.
"I know the two of you are friends and all now Gin, but I don't think…" Ron had begun but I had stopped him before he could continue.
"If she and Nemo are friends now, I reckon it would be nice for her to have a female companion. Don't you think so Ron?"
"Well, I suppose you're right, but Harry, you know Nemo's shy…" Ron had begun to protest, but Ginny cut him short…
"Harry says it's fine then it's fine. Well, come on then, let us not keep Nemo waiting." Ginny said as she grabbed the broom she hid at the bottom of the stairs. Ron just sighed and complained about young people having no respect for their superiors, while Ginny just rolled her eyes at her brother's antics. The three of us mounted our brooms and headed straight for the forest.
When we arrived at Nemo's old run down cabin I could not help but grin for now I feel as though I have truly come back home. As my feet crushed the green grass and the cold wind blew some of my raven tendrils away I could not help but feel as though something was amiss.
It was like something was draped with an invisibility cloak, that something is still completely hidden from us but then that doesn't mean it isn't there. It might just be waiting. Although, I still haven't decided if it's a good thing or a bad one. I quickly quash that nonsense thought, since there was only one thing that I was certain about and that is…
She's there inside her cabin, waiting for us, waiting for me…
I was smiling now; it no longer pained me to think of her, since I have decided I was finally going to allow myself to love her. Now that I have finally chosen to take a chance despite the impossible, I was going to make this work.
But then…
XXX
"Hey Harry, you alright mate?" Ron asked me as he handed me a butterbeer. He plopped down beside me on the bench, the two of us are out here sitting in our rose garden. I'm tempted to say I'm not, instead I gulped down the cold butterbeer. It seems everything about this day is cold.
It's already night time now and dinner had just finished. Instead of joining the others inside I'm out here sitting in the cold, drowning in my pathetic misery. I hate this. I hated the cold, it's no longer as comforting as it used to be.
Now I just want to feel numb and not so idiotic and bloody vulnerable.
"I reckon your mum grounding you for a week for us coming back here three hours late is the reason for your foul mood. It's not so bad mate, besides, I'd be staying here for a week to keep you company. So cheer up." Ron nudged me, but I wasn't feeling well, and I didn't want to try and hide it.
"Do you think dad will let us drink firewhisky?" I asked him instead as I downed another gulped and winced as the icy drink slid roughly down my throat, funny, I couldn't even taste the sweetness just its pronounced freezing effect.
"Not with your mum around he won't." Ron playfully added. I would have laughed too, except I don't find anything funny.
"She wasn't there Ron." Ron sighed as he took a sip of his drink before replying.
"Maybe it's just payback Harry, after all you have been the one who was avoiding her all this time."
"I checked the mirror recently she's still not there. Nemo might be mad but I know her she wouldn't try to avoid you, or Ginny, even if she's mad at me. We searched for hours, she wasn't there and that's not normal."
"Harry, maybe you're just over thinking things…" Ron didn't get to finish his sentence as I threw the butterbeer at the ground the glass shattered and the cold drink wetted the grass and the bottom of our trousers and shoes.
But no one heard the crashing sound, no one, for it's just me and Ron out here in the cold.
"Damnit Ron! Can't you see something's gone wrong? Tell me, surely you feel it too."
"Okay mate, I admit I agree with you. What I don't understand is why are you so bloody moody and worked up? Don't get me wrong I'm worried too, but you seem more than worried and clearly pissed. Tell me, what is it really?" Ron asked me as he shifted in his chair to get a closer look at me. I can feel my glasses fogging up. I feel light-headed and suddenly very tired.
"You might not understand."
"I'm your best mate, I'll find a way to understand, even if Nemo claims I'm thick headed." I smiled at that, the thought of Nemo always seemed to make me smile.
"I'm scared Ron…" I told him honestly.
"Of what?"
"Of this, of what I'm feeling. It's more than worry and being pissed at Nemo's disappearance. I'm also angry, confuse, disappointed, and there's so much more. You see…I…forget it." I said looking away instead focusing on the broken glass lightly glistening in the pale moonlight.
"I'm in love with her…" Ron suddenly blurted out and I turn to him quite surprised, what was he saying?
"That's what you were going to say right?" Ron told me, looking at me with amused but understanding eyes.
"How did you know? When?" I asked him appalled, but at the same time I felt relief as well.
"When I saw you break down in the forest earlier it seemed to click into place. All this time, you've loved her." Ron said as he smiled at me kindly.
"I…its wrong isn't it?"
"I don't think there's a rule about it being prohibited." Ron told me with a grin and I grinned back.
"Why…why aren't you…I mean are you okay with this?"
"I wouldn't lie, I'm worried. You know this love thing business, never been good with it, of course I'm not good with a lot of things but I reckon it's not going to be easy. Of course you probably know that already, do you?" Ron asked me seriously and I almost laughed, it's rare to see Ron act so seriously.
"I know." I told him bluntly and Ron nodded in understanding.
"That's good mate, now the important question…"
"Is she worth it?" He asked me intently his blue eyes piercing into mine. In a way I know he was also asking for Nemo's sake. We're both his friends. He just found out I was in love with his other best friend. And now he wants to be supportive but fair to the both of us. He wants to know if I was serious.
"Yes." I answered simply and Ron let out a heavy sigh, and patted me on the back.
"Good. But if you break each others' hearts I'll have to kill you."
"Why just me?"I asked him playfully pretending to be wounded.
"I can't kill a ghost now could I?" Ron just grinned at me and we laughed at that. I was suddenly feeling a lot better. I promised to myself I was going to find Nemo and I was going to tell her how I felt. I waited so long, and now I'm afraid I might be too late.
XXX
I'm sitting here by the river throwing pebbles in the water each time causing ripples but they don't last the river continues to flow downstream like I've done nothing. I realize no matter how hard I try the river will never fight back.
I let out a frustrated sigh and ruffle my already dishevelled hair. School's about to start in two weeks and I still haven't seen her. Where could she be? I can't imagine her leaving without saying goodbye. I wonder if she's that mad at me.
Not far behind I hear the zooming sound of a broom and shuffling behind me as I hear the person dismounting the broom.
"I thought you went home…" I asked Ron as he had said goodbye about twenty minutes ago telling me that he was already hungry since it was getting close to dinner time. I had chosen to stay behind. Summer is about to end and I still haven't seen Nemo. I've been really depressed and hopeless as each day passed. I think I have found comfort in sulking.
"I just arrived, pup." I quickly looked behind my shoulders as I recognize that voice anywhere.
"Sirius?" I gasped as I quickly stood up and dusted the grass stains off my pants and shook his hand.
"How are you pup?"
"Fine. What are you doing here?" I asked him for it truly was a surprise for me to see him here.
"Well, I was there sitting at home, enjoying a nice dinner by myself when Lily's patronus came asking me to babysit her little boy and Ron as she and James are on a date. I don't know about you but I stopped babysitting you since you started Hogwarts. What happened?"
I turned away I did not want to tell Sirius. I didn't even tell my parents and they've been worried about me. They think I don't notice but I do. They suspect something is wrong, and now Sirius does too.
"Ron's all by himself at home when I arrived. Imagine my surprise; you two never left each other's side before…did the two of you fight?"
"No…Ron and I we're fine. It's complicated." I told him as I sat back down.
"Well…" Sirius begun as he plopped himself beside me and sat by my side.
"Can you just give me a vague explanation?" Sirius had pleaded, giving me one of those puppy dog eyes he uses on my father to get him to do what he wanted. I sighed since it's working on me too…
"Alright…but it's going to be really vague. Sure you can handle it?" I told him and I see the corner of his mouth twitch.
"How daft do you think I am pup? I may be old in your eyes but I most definitely am not senile. Go on then, be as vague as you want…" Sirius teased me as he cradled his face in both his hands, giving me an impression of a kid waiting to be read his favourite bedtime story.
"Okay, you see I lost something, something very important and dear to me, something I love. No matter how hard I try, I can't find it and I'm afraid I'll never see it again. And now all I feel is regret since I don't think I've done a good job of taking good care of it. What do I do now?"
"Well, is that thing replaceable?" Sirius had asked me.
I thought about Nemo. Of all the things we did, all the laughter and talks we've shared, her voice, her smile, and everything that she is.
"No." I told him honestly.
"Well, the things we lost, as long as we truly love them, are always with us."
"But I can't see it anymore, I can't be with it anymore…" I told him sternly, and silently asking him silently to stop giving me bull.
"Haven't you been listening pup? Those that are important to us never actually left. If you've looked hard enough then maybe it's time for you to wait for it to turn up."
We remained silent after that.
That night as I lay awake on my bed staring at my enchanted ceiling I promised myself to stop this crazy chase. Maybe, in some weird and frustrating way the world is telling me that Nemo and I shouldn't be together. Or maybe it just isn't our time…
I thought about her that night and I promised myself it would be the last time. It seemed that Nemo had moved on and maybe now, I should too.
XXX
"Harry! I'm going to Saint Mungo's Hospital. Can you handle going to Floorish and Blotts by yourself?" Mum asked me as she wrapped her cloak around her healer's robes.
"I'm not eleven mum. I'm sure I can handle buying my books by myself."
"Oh, sometimes I forget you're a big boy now. I think I'll always see you as my little one." Mum said as she enclosed me in a bone crushing hug.
"That' sweet and all mum, but I think I'm getting a toothache…" I told my mum and she playfully ruffled my hair, I bent my head slightly so she could reach it and let her mess up my already untamable hair.
"Oh, hush you. Come on, grab your cloak, we're flooing to Diagon Alley."
XXX
I was walking towards the bookshop. I was alone with the list of my sixth year textbook and the NEWT classes I would be taking kept within my pockets, along with a chocolate frog, just in case I get hungry. As I paced the streets, I wave at familiar and excited faces as they went about shopping for their school materials.
Everyone's excited for the incoming school year and despite everything, I feel excited too. Although, I still don't know whether I want to become an Auror or a professional Quidditch seeker. I've taken up NEWT classes needed to become an Auror though, as I only need to take a few NEWT classes if I wanted to become a professional Quidditch player.
As I neared Flourish and Blotts, I realized that one of my shoelaces was untied. I stopped and bent down to tie it up. As I was finishing I hastily stood up, determined to continue my walk, but before I could take the first step I was painfully aware that I have collided against a collection of books and now I'm lying on the ground. I saw about twenty or more books scattered all around me. I wondered if I somehow crashed into a walking bookcase.
"Oh my God!" I heard a feminine voice speak but before I could see her face she had scrambled to the ground kneeling as she hastily gathered the large tomes all around her. Her thick ,wild, and brown curls falling like a curtain over her, and successfully hiding her face from any curious onlookers.
Embarrassed as I realized I might also be the reason why we were now in this predicament I too helped pick up her books. She must have been walking all alone carrying all those books and I wondered how she managed to do it. Surely it might have been easier to cast a shrinking charm or buy a bag like my mum's.
"Here I handed about ten books to her, she then looked up, as if noticing me for the first time and when she did, she almost took my breath away. All I saw were big brown eyes, framed by thick and long dark lashes, I was mesmerized, I've never seen such beautiful brown color before and yet they looked oddly familiar.
"I'm sorry…" The girl had begun to speak as she bent her head once more and gathered more books stuffing them into her book bag. Oddly, her voice sounded familiar too.
"No problem." I said as I grabbed a 'Hogwarts A History' book and helped her up.
"Thank you." she said, and this time she looked at me with a smile which allowed me to see her face properly. She was beautiful, but not like Fleur who was so ethereal and perfect like a goddess, not like Ginny who was like fire, hot, tempting, fiery and seductive, no, she was beautiful like simplicity and innocence.
"You're welcome," I said handing her the book she gratefully took it and placed it at the top of her pilling books, before she started to bend down to carry the books in her arms. I can't help but get this nagging feeling at the back of my mind that I know her, that I should know her.
"So…you could have used a simple shrinking charm, it would have been easier to carry all those books." I told her, and she stopped balancing her books and I could sense her trying to fight the blush that tinted her cheeks.
"Oh, sorry I forgot. I'm new to this." She said as she put down all her books and shrank them.
"So are you a transferee to Hogwarts, I've never seen you before?" I asked her highly intrigued by this girl.
"Sixth year new student actually…" She told me as she placed her shrunken books inside her book bag.
"Come on child, let us go!" I heard professor McGonagall say as she approached the two of us. I was surprised what was the girl doing with my head of house.
"Good morning professor." I greeted her.
"Potter. It's good to see you too." She greeted me but then turned back to the girl and looked at her.
"Come on, or we'll be late." Professor McGonagall turned and grabbed her hand and they went the opposite way. I spun around to watch them go, and as I did I saw her looking over her shoulder. I smiled at her and she smiled back and gently raised her hand as if to say goodbye. And as the sunlight reflected around her causing wonders that highlighted the different shades of browns in her hair and eyes, it was then that I realized. It was Nemo.
Struck with the realization, I sprinted towards them, but I was too late. Professor McGonagall had left with Nemo as they had just disapperated at the apparation point.
I didn't know if I was right, all I knew was that the girl that I just saw, she looked exactly like Nemo. But why didn't she recognize me?
I had a lot of questions in my head; but I knew all of them would be answered when I get back to Hogwarts.
For the first time in weeks, I finally smiled a genuine smile.
I could not wait for the term to start…
XXX
"Harry are you sure you saw her?"
"Yes Ron, I'm positive." I told Ron exasperatedly.
When I got back from my trip to Diagon Alley, I had eagerly told Ron the news that I have seen her. And for a week I could not sleep just thinking of her. When we arrived at King's Cross I kept looking for her, but I did not find her. I decided that I might see her at the Great Hall. So Ron and I played wizard's chess, exploding snaps, and ate chocolate as we passed the time to Hogwarts.
We were now at the Great Hall and both Ron and I still haven't seen her. We kept scanning the area hoping to find her trademark brown curly hair, but to no avail. Even Ginny had joined in searching.
"Attention!" I hear Dumbledore speak as he gave the compulsory opening speech to welcome the first years and transferees from other schools who have enrolled at Hogwarts and are to be sorted into Houses.
As the doors opened to welcome the first year students and transferees I could feel my heart stop. There she was. She was walking along with the transferees, her chin held up but her eyes betrayed her calm exterior, in them I could see her unease. I almost smiled at that, but then Ron nudged me at the side…
"Merlin Harry! I see her, that's her isn't it?" Ron asked, a look of disbelief in his face. I smiled now…
"Yes, it's her." I told him as I continued watching her.
"Now remember, she might just look like Nemo, so let us not scare her." I said reminding Ron, he just nodded but I feel as though I was just saying those things to remind myself rather than him.
The reading of names had begun; it seemed forever until Nemo's name was called.
"Hermione Granger…"
Hermione…
Granger…I repeated the name in my head, for some reason Granger sounded familiar.
Ron and I watched her take a deep breath. Then she bit her lip as she took slow steps towards the sorting hat.
"I'm telling you, that's Nemo alright. You know she's famous for her lip biting." Ron told me. I was tempted to say I know, but my concentration was purely focused on Hermione as the hat was slipped over her head. It seemed I stopped breathing all over again. I kept wishing in my head to make the sorting hat put her in Gryffindor. I kept my fingers crossed under the table as the sorting hat remarked about Hermione's brightness and brilliance, I could not help but feel proud, she was going to be the brightest witch Hogwarts would see, after my mum that is…
"Ravenclaw!" I heard the sorting hat exclaim and I could hear the Ravenclaw table rejoicing as she went to their table grinning happily and sat beside the blonde peculiar girl who wears the radish earrings. I know her as Ginny's friend; Luna Lovegood. I noticed Hermione seemed happy as her housemates welcomed her. But then I was painfully aware that Ron sagged beside me…
"Bugger…" Ron sighed as he cradled his head in one of his arms.
"There goes our chance at winning the house cup…" Ron sighed as I jabbed him lightly at his side making him sit straight once more.
"Ouch! You know I was only joking, it sucks we won't be able to talk to her during the Feast but she's in our year, we're bound to run into her. I'm just disappointed Nemo won't be garnering points for our house, you know she's pretty brilliant with this school stuff." I jabbed Ron once more but then we broke out laughing.
I realized that it did not matter what house Hermione was in, even if she ended up in Slytherin; I could not care less what her house was, all I cared about is that she's here, she's finally here. Hermione and I…we had so much to do.
Which reminds me…
"Hey Ron?"
"Yeah?"
"Her name's Hermione…"
XXX
I arrived at the library panting. I could feel my sweat pouring like a waterfall and sliding down my back, and my glasses seemed to be fogging up. I leaned at a nearby desk and started wiping my sweat with my handkerchief. I wouldn't be surprised if I wring it and find water pouring from it. I started taking deep breaths as I struggled to even my heavy breathings.
The library seemed to be deserted as the students are still in the Great Hall enjoying dessert, and no one in their right mind would study in the library while classes haven't begun. After dinner, Hogwarts students would all be likely in their commonrooms trading stories of their summer experiences.
From the corner of my eyes I could see Madame Pince looking at me with disapproving eyes but there was also a mixture of amusement.
"May I remind you Mister Potter, that the library isn't going anywhere. There's no need to rush." She reminded me, I could not help but blush in embarrassment. I must look like a mess, the sweaty idiot running inside the library as if it was Hogwarts' Express and I was running late.
I nodded in agreement and started walking around the area. I noticed that all the tables were empty and all the books still seemed to be in their correct places and untouched. I scanned the area hoping to catch a glimpse of Hermione.
I wanted to corner her and talk to her before we all retired to our respective common rooms. But I got distracted talking to Ron and the guys and when I glanced back at their table I noticed Luna sitting alone and I realized Hermione had left. I wanted to go into the common room and get my map but I realized that I still did not know our new password. There was only one place I could think of, the most likely place she would be found.
She always did talk so highly of Hogwarts Library, and she always seemed so eager to visit this place most. I showed her pictures of it once and I remembered the utter longing in her eyes as she scanned the pictures.
As I thought this, I hastily said goodbye to Ron and my friends just as dessert had begun. Ron even tried to persuade me that I would be missing out on delicious treats, but it didn't matter; besides I always kept a chocolate frog inside the pockets of my robes. It has become a habit after all the times I passed out learning to cast a patronus against a boggart two summers ago. Remus not only taught me to cast a full grown patronus but he also taught me how helpful chocolate could be.
As I arrived at the magical creatures section in the library I was surprised to see a brown curly mane hovering around the area with a few opened books placed on top the nearby table. Her brows were all furrowed in confusion as she seemed to be well involved in her task. She didn't even seem like she noticed me.
"Hermione right?" I suddenly blurted out; I mentally smack myself, of all the cool ways to start a conversation I had to start with the obvious. Gee, real smooth Potter.
She flinched and ungracefully dropped the book she was holding and she scrambled to pick it up, then nervously turned to face me. From an emotion of horror and embarrassment painted across her face it quickly turned into relief as she saw me. She gave me a shy smile as she tucked a stray curly lock that had fallen from her ponytail. Merlin, how I'd love to know how that wild hair of hers would feel like, wrapped around my fingers. I've seen that mane a thousand times, and yet I have never known it.
"Oh, it's you. Potter, right?" She had asked me flushing from shyness. I could not help but smile. I was beginning to like seeing color to her cheeks.
"Harry Potter to be précised." I told her grinning; it's weird that I seem to be reintroducing myself to her.
"Uhm, Hermione Granger." She set her book down and held out her hand to me. I looked at her hands almost surprised, I never actually touched her hand before, everything about her just seemed like a constant cold wind. I smiled nonetheless and took her hand and I could not help but notice that it's warm in my hands. I'm reminded once again that's she's real now, she's here and she's not a ghost.
"Why aren't you at the Great Hall?" She had asked me.
"I could ask the same. Aren't you excited to have your first taste of Hogwarts' desserts?" I asked her back and she blushed once more. I smiled in excitement I never knew Hermione blushed so much; it just goes to show there are just more about her that I still haven't known.
"Oh, I've never been much of a dessert person. And it must be an acquired taste since my parents are both dentists after all. Oh, uhm…" Hermione seemed to be suddenly uncomfortable as if she just said something offending which confused me, and then I realized the cause of her unease…
Dentists… her parents were dentist which means she must be of Muggle descent. She must have found out the prejudice the wizarding society have against muggleborns and now she doesn't know what I will make of her…
I gave her one of my famous grin, the one Ginny swore made her swoon, although I doubt it came out as confident as I want myself to seem…
"Well I hope they didn't pull out your sweet tooth, by accident of course." She smiled slightly at that and I could feel her easing into the conversation with me.
"So…we did not finish our conversation before, how come you're a new student here? Haven't you been to other magical schools before?" I asked her curiously, for some reason I feel like I needed to hear her answer to this question for me to really make sure that she was indeed Nemo.
"Uhm, no…I've never been to a magical school before. This is my first time in one, but even if I've just known this world I feel as though I've been waiting a long time to finally be here you know." She gave me a tentative smile and I sense she had grown shy once more. But I was confused, so I pressed on…
"What do you mean about being new to this world? Didn't you receive your letter when you were eleven?" I asked her looking straight at her brown eyes, she averted my eyes then as if burned, and I started wondering if I crossed a line. I sighed; I wanted to do this right…
"It's okay; you don't have to tell me if it makes you uncomfortable." I reassured her, and she released a suppressed sigh and I felt her relax. But then she looked at me, this time it's her brown eyes that's peircing into mine…
"It's alright, I feel as though, I can tell you anything. Like you're an old friend…it's silly, I know." She tells me shyly instead. I smiled and I felt relieve that I did not lose her.
"You can trust me."
"I know." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, after these she looked at me and begun to tell me her story.
She told me that on her seventh birthday her parents took her to a family picnic in the forest of Dean before her birthday party that night. She tried to cross the other side of the river by hopping from one stone to another when she slipped and fell into the river. She's been a coma for almost ten years now. And she just recently woke up. She didn't receive her Hogwarts letter since those letters are only delivered to young and living wizards and witches, she however was hanging in between during that time. She received her letter a week after she had woken up. She was staying in London now as she had undergone various tests to check her physical, mental and even her emotional health.
The doctors had commented that she was recovering well. When they made her take assessment tests to find out if her thinking skills had been affected during the almost ten years of having no brain activity; they were surprised, for the best they were hoping was for her to retain her knowledge when she was seven years old but when she took the tests they found out that she scored an average score for the tests designed for her age group. The doctors had wondered how she could have known about subjects she had yet to learn. Although she didn't get a superior on those tests like she used to when she was seven, getting a passing and an average mark on those tests was quite a remarkable feat.
Her parents were in the middle of contemplating on whether to get her a private tutor or enrol her at a good high school when an owl arrived carrying a Hogwarts letter. At first they had thought it was a joke. But the letters kept coming back and after three days Professor McGonagall had showed up in the London flat that the Grangers' were staying at.
She had told them that Hermione was a rare case as her name just recently appeared in the ministry of magic as a registered and underage witch qualified for Hogwarts. Without thinking, Hermione had said that she wanted to go. She was confused by how she seemed to be thrilled by the news rather than frightened like her parents were.
She had so many questions, she says and she wonders and thinks that maybe being at Hogwarts would answer them. Professor McGonagall, like the muggle doctors gave her tests both written and oral, and professor McGonagall was surprised that she seemed to be qualified to take up NEWT classes, not to mention she had scored incredibly high scores as if she had already learned all those lessons previously. Everyone was surprised with her skills, including Hermione.
She claims she had never known about this whole other world, but after she read and heard each question thrown at her it's as if the subconscious part of her brain had told her the right answers and each time she got it correct she was shocked but not really surprised. And now she's here, a school she never thought she would be at. Professor McGonagall had been a big help to her. She had been giving her lessons, orienting her about the magical world and the professor also helped her convince her parents to send her to Hogwarts as they had been reluctant and opposed to the idea of Hermione being away from them when they had just gotten her back.
As she told her story I had to fight myself from exclaiming and bouncing for joy. I had finally found her and I'm finally positive that she is Nemo. All the confusion I had faced suddenly cleared like all the puzzle pieces had finally fallen into place. There was just one more question I had to ask her…
"During your coma, is there anything you remember? Anything at all?" I asked her, by the furrowing of her brows, her story and her reaction towards me I already knew the answer. But I had to hear it from her.
"No…being in a coma felt like just sleeping, and waking up. Except I'm older and possessing all this knowledge that I know not how I learned." She told me and I could sense she was being honest. I tried to hide my disappointment but she seemed to notice this as she gently touched my arm.
"Are you alright Harry?" Her voiced had asked me and I'm reminded just how many times this scene had played before, with her asking how I was feeling, and no matter how many times I've experienced this, her voice would always remain comforting. But for her, this was her first time trying to comfort me, her first time meeting me.
"Never better…" I told her as I gave her a rueful smile. I was disappointed, sad even that she didn't remember me nor Ron and the friendship the three of us shared for almost six years now. She's familiar, but to her I'm new. I've been waiting for her to arrive for so long and for her I'm just a stranger she had just met. But it was okay, I was fine, and today was truly better than yesterday…
I had managed to become her best friend before; I can become just her friend again. Although I had started the year hoping I could be more than her best friend, I guess I could manage starting from the beginning. No matter how long it takes, even if she will never remember those times we shared, even if it'll only be my secret, my treasure to hide, those memories we've had would always be mine to keep, and hers to have lost won't matter, for I'm determined to make new memories with her. We'll get our bond back, one step at a time…
"You know, I truly do feel as if I know you. And I'm not just saying that…" Hermione tells me.
"Who knows, we might have met while you were sleeping." I told her cheekily and she laughed.
"I'm not really good at making friends and I'm surprised how easy it is with you…" She confessed. And I could not help but smile again, even if she lost her memories at least the feelings have remained like all her learnings had stayed with her too.
"Which reminds me, why are you here?"
"Oh, well a housemate of mine, her name is Luna, she's a lovely girl but she can be a little off too. She told me I had plenty of wrackspurts in my head and they're the reason for my head being fuzzy. I don't really know if I believe her or not, or if such creatures exists, since I have yet to encounter the mention of those creatures, but I'm also new to this world, for all I know they do exist. And she might be right…I figured I should check the library for a bit of information before we retire to our common rooms…"
I knew Luna was known for being whimsical and eccentric even to the point that people have been calling her a loony but I'm not about to tell Hermione that. I respect both girls too much to try and do something that might destroy their budding friendship, so I just kept quiet.
"Well, that's nice…but couldn't it have waited until tomorrow? You do know you have missed your first Hogwarts dinner for this don't you? Well, you just missed dessert the better part of dinner might I add." I told her teasingly and she flushed once more.
She threw her hands over her face to try and hide her embarrassment and failing miserably.
"Oh dear, you're right! You must be thinking that I'm being so silly. Trust me I'm mostly reasonable."
"I know…it's alright." I told her reassuringly.
"It's just that I've always had a fascination for books, and I really wanted to visit the library too. Do you think we've missed dessert?" She asked me while looking at the clock…
"Well dinner time's not yet over, but I wonder if there's any left…" I told her honestly.
"Oh bugger! Come on let's go, there might be some left…I haven't tasted a magical dessert before, and I've read lots about how tasty they are, I can't believe I let myself miss this opportunity…" Hermione continued to rant as I followed her out of the library smiling at how cute she was talking to herself…it was a rare sight seeing Hermione getting that worked up about her so called own idiocy as often times it's Ron and I who receive those lectures.
"Hermione!" I told her as I caught up with her in the halls. Blimey, she was a fast walker.
"What is it Harry?"
I pulled out the chocolate frog in my pockets and gingerly gave it to her while it's still in its box. I'm filled with nostalgia once more as I remember me doing this before except, on the first time that I did she wasn't able to eat it and now she could. She looked at me with confusion in her eyes. Now it's my turn to fidget and blush.
"Uhm…I…you said you've never eaten a magical candy before…right?"
"Yeah."
"Well, that's a chocolate frog. It's delicious by the way. You should try it."
"Thanks Harry," She told me as she opened it and took a small bite. I watched her chew it and slowly licked the few remnants of chocolate at the corner of her lips after. A look of satisfaction and gratefulness adorned her beautiful face.
"It's delicious Harry, thank you."
"You're welcome; you know there's more where that came from. You should stick around and I might give you more treats." I smiled at her and she laughed lightly at that.
"Well, I will only befriend you for the benefits you give me…" Hermione said rolling her eyes.
"Hermione…do you know how that sentence sounded like to a boy?" I told her playfully and she blushed profusely.
"Oh, you boys have nothing better to think of do you? Well Potter, get your mind off the gutter…" She replied playfully as she lightly swatted my elbows. The two of us ended up laughing and alone in the corridors, until I remembered we had another place to get to, and people to meet.
"Come on, or you're going to miss dessert." I told her as I held out my hand to her, and she took it without hesitation. We shared a brief smile before running off together towards the great hall.
When I met Hermione it was an accident.
When she became my best friend it was a blessing.
When I fell in love with her it was wrong.
When I saw her again, it was a miracle.
And this… us holding each other's hand and beginning everything all over again, this is entirely imperfect. But you know what, this feels right…
It's not going to be easy this I know of but…
That's what makes it more interesting.
FIN.
XXX
AN: I apologize for my mistakes I hate proofreading it's just so tedious…
I hope you guys enjoyed and please, please do leave a review….I'm begging you especially if you like this…
Thanks for reading! This is Nym13, signing off…