Chapter 8 - Grieving
Harry walked to his original boys' dormitories instead of his private one he shared with Hermione. He figured that maybe she would return there and he didn't want her to have to face him. He sat on the edge of his old bed and put his head in his hands, breaking down immediately. His heart had never felt anymore broken. If there was anything more painful than his burning scar or falling 50 feet off a broomstick while playing Quidditch, this was it.
His mind raced as he sobbed, so loudly he was surprised that no one had come up to see what was going on. This wasn't it! This couldn't be happening to him! When he told Hermione that he was sorry, he couldn't have been more truthful about it to her. Why didn't she see the truth in his eyes that time? What was so different about that time? Then it suddenly hit him: maybe his eyes were telling her the truth. Serine had aroused him so much that he did kind of give in to her at one point. But was it intentional? Did he really want that? Or was it because was about to get what he didn't get it from Hermione? Or was he imagining it was Hermione he was with? He felt so guilty, so sad, and so sick ever having even the slightest attraction to Serine. The sight of him and her in the empty corridor fooling around kept popping in his head and it made him sick to his stomach. Another thing that really bothered him: why wasn't he able to get away? To run when she had backed him into that wall? It didn't make any sense to him. To make matters worst, he was so close. So close to Hermione's birthday. He glanced quickly over to Ron's Quidditch calendar to check the date: September 17th. Two days before Hermione's birthday. He cried even more when this information sank into his brain. At that point, Ron came in, probably hearing his loud sobs.
"Harry!" he exclaimed, seeing him crying his eyes out on his bed. "What the bloody hell is going on!?"
"It's…it's over Ron," Harry squeaked through his crying.
"What's over Harry?"
"Herm… Hermione and me."
Ron felt a shiver go down his spine. For some reason, he felt really sick. "Are you serious Harry?"
That did not make Harry feel any better. It made him more livid than he already was. For a minute, all sadness went away and replaced with so much anger, Harry felt like killing something. He got up and darted toward Ron, putting his face so close to his that their noses almost touched.
"Look at me Ron!" Harry shouted at the top of his lungs, pointing to his warped face. "Look at the damn tears that run like a faucet from the blood shot eyes! Or maybe you don't see it clearly enough" he added, forcefully taking off his glasses. "Look at the cheeks that are soaked in it! Does it look like I'm fucking joking Ron!?"
Ron stared at Harry, his eyes were wide with fear and his was pale from hearing Harry's speech. He had never seen Harry so sad, yet so upset at the same time. Ron, being the notorious person he was for not making things any better, muttered, "And to think, just two days before her birthday…"
"I know Ron!" Harry, obviously hearing him and shouting again at the top of his lungs. He was so mad, and Ron's stupid remark made him even more livid than he already was. Harry, filled with rage, took his glasses he had in his hand, and threw it toward a wall as hard as he could. The force was so strong, it completely shattered the lenses and bending the frame. Not looking like he cared, Harry walked back and sat on his bed, breaking down once again. At that moment, Adelle made her way up the stairs.
"I thought I heard yelling. What is going -?" But she paused when she saw Harry crying on the bed.
"What's the matter with Harry, Ron?" she asked, a look of concern on her face. She noticed Harry's broken glasses on the floor. "You didn't hit him did you!?" she exclaimed, giving Ron a disgusted look.
"Of course not," he replied softly, still shocked from all that had happened. He told Adelle about what Harry had told him. He and Hermione breaking up, yelling at Ron for asking him if he was serious, and Harry throwing his glasses out of rage. They both watched sadly as Harry (who didn't even notice Adelle had entered the room. Or if he cared at all) continued to cry, feeling very sorry for him. Adelle got enough courage to sit down next to him, putting a comforting arm around him. Ron stood at the foot of the bed, slightly to Harry's side.
"Come on Harry," Adelle said, comfortably. "Get a hold of yourself. It'll be ok."
"I… don't think… it'll ever… be ok," Harry sniffled. He had cried so much, he had lost a lot of energy, taking quick intakes of air for breaths.
"Yeah Harry come on. Why don't you tell up what happened?" Ron asked, also trying to make Harry feel better. So Harry told them. All about Serine, how she was trying to seduce him. About how Hermione had caught him the first time, and forgave him. About Serine trying to seduce him a second time, Hermione catching him again. About how he couldn't seem to run, like he under some sort of spell. About how sorry he was to Hermione, and about how she couldn't find the truth in his eyes this time, probably because he had given in to Serine at one point. And the sickening feeling Harry got when Hermione told him it was over between them. Harry felt a little better from telling them what had happened, but it still didn't cure him completely. Adelle accepted his story without question. Ron on the other hand, was still a little skeptical.
"I don't know Harry," he said, looking skeptical. "I still don't know why you didn't run from her in the first place."
"Because I couldn't run Ron!" exclaimed Harry, feeling frustrated.
"Yeah Ron," butted Adelle. "Give Harry a break here. If he said he couldn't get away, then he couldn't get away. Period."
"I don't know," Ron replied, rubbing his chin. "I mean, I wouldn't want to get away either." he said that last part under his breath, Harry and Adelle barely hearing him.
"What was that Ron?" said Adelle, her eyes narrowing, starting to also feel frustrated with Ron.
"No Adelle, wait," said Harry, putting an arm in front of her to stop her from advancing on Ron. "Ron doesn't seem to understand this. And maybe, I can clear this up for him; put it in a way he can understand." He noticed that he was starting to sound a lot like Hermione, which hurt a little bit at the remembrance of her.
"I just don't believe that you don't believe be Ron," he added, shaking his head. "I also am going to hate myself for doing this, but if it's the only way I can prove myself, so be it."
"Do what?" asked Ron, looking irritated.
"Petrificus Totalus!" shouted Harry, after quickly grabbing his wand out of his robes pocket and pointing it at Ron. Ron's back went straight and his arms to his side like a soldier. He was standing, as stiff as a rock. Harry had an evil grin on his face as he tucked his wand away safely. He turned to Adelle and said nonchalantly, as though he had done nothing wrong. "Adelle, will you please get my glasses?"
Adelle looked shocked at what Harry had done to her boyfriend. She was also impressed at how he had handled himself now that he and Hermione were no longer a couple. Nonetheless, she got his glasses and mended them with a "Reparo" spell.
"Thanks Adelle," Harry said as she handed him his glasses and put them back on. "Can you please sit down while I handle this?" She did was she was told. Harry turned back to Ron with authority in his eyes.
"She's a good girl," snaked Harry quietly to Ron, referring to Adelle. There was a look of evil in his eyes now. "She does as she's told. I like that in a woman. There's also something else I'd like to put in her."
Harry gave Ron a very evil sneer with a look of cruel intentions in his eyes. He couldn't tell from Ron's look because he was petrified, but he must have been getting really mad by now, all according to his plan. He leaned in closer to Ron.
"I've been eyeing Adelle for some time now Ron, and she looks so, sexy," he whispered, loud enough for Ron to hear, but soft enough that Adelle didn't. He turned around to look at her, then back at Ron. "She looks so lonely over there Ron. Maybe I can go and, comfort her over there on the bed. It'll be fun, watching your girlfriend have sex with another guy. I'm sure you don't mind, do you Ron?"
He tried to make that sound as convincing as possible. He knew he did his job because he could kind of feel the heat go into Ron's face and his attempt to try and punch him in the face. Harry smiled, knowing that it was working.
"What was that Ron?" he shouted in a sarcastic way so that Adelle could now hear what he was saying. "Looks like your getting a bit upset standing over there."
"Harry what are you doing?" asked Adelle, looking sideways at him.
"Trying to prove a point," Harry said, not taking his eyes off Ron.
"What's the point?" she asked, looking confused. Harry ignored her.
"You must be really pissed at me aren't you Ron?" Harry said, trying to anger him some more. "Why don't you go ahead and punch me in the face then Ron? Come on! I know you want to!"
Ron only remained in his frozen form. Still, Harry could tell that Ron was getting livid, the more he persuaded him (Ron could make growling noises). Adelle seemed to be getting the picture too.
"Go ahead Ron!" Harry taunted, sticking his cheek in Ron's face and pointing to it.
"Right there! Hit me right there! Go on, I'm letting you!"
Ron did nothing.
"Come on Ron!" shouted Harry with all his might. "Go and give me your best shot! Come on you wimp! Punch me dammit!"
Ron still did nothing. But he did make an audible growl, like he was trying to sock Harry in the face.
"Come on!"
Harry dropped his pointed finger from his cheek, and looked back at Ron. He was no longer taunting him, but he had a see-what-I-mean look on his face.
"Can't do it, can you Ron?" he asked, looking sideways at him. He glanced over at Adelle. "See?"
She nodded in confirmation and Harry turned back to Ron.
"See what I mean Ron?" said Harry, obviously not going receive an answer. "Clear your throat if you understand."
He could hear a sound coming from Ron that sounded like he was clearing his throat, but nonetheless, reversed the spell. After Ron was freed, he put his hands on his knees and he was breathing deeply, like he was catching his breath. He raised his head and shot a look of scorn at Harry, and walked toward him in a commanding way. Harry backed away slowly, thinking that Ron wasn't going to do anything that he was going to regret.
"Sorry about that, Ron. I had to sound as convincing as possible to make you mad at me. I had to prove a point!" Harry added apologetically, as Ron raised a hand, looking like he was ready to kill him. Ron stopped suddenly, dropped his hand, and nodded his head in understanding.
"Couldn't move could you?" Harry asked again, breathing with relief.
"No I couldn't," Ron said, shaking his head. "Is that what it felt like?"
"Finally, I get you to understand!" Harry said appraisingly, throwing his hands in the air
as if he had just won a war. "Yes Ron! That's what it exactly felt like!"
"Then why didn't you just tell Hermione that she put a curse on you Harry?" Adelle asked on the side.
"Because I didn't know what she had on me," he answered, turning in her direction. "She had something done on me and I don't think it was a curse, because she didn't use a wand or say any incantations."
"That's weird," said Ron, scratching his head. "Sounds like some kind of thing related to the Dark Arts."
"I know," said Harry. "But I'm not worrying about that right now. Right now all that matters to me is Hermione and her well-being." Ron and Adelle shot Harry a look.
"I may have lost her as a girlfriend," he added, "but she still is a friend to me."
"Are you going to be ok Harry?" asked Adelle.
"I hope so," Harry sighed, fighting back tears that were starting to form in his eyes. "I just need to talk to her. To discuss where things are going to go from here. Things will never be the same since we have decided to be more than friends." Harry dropped his head and massaged his temple with one hand.
"It'll be ok Harry," Ron said soothingly. "I'm sure it'll be ok."
"Thanks Ron," he replied, raising his head, and forcing a smile. Ron and Adelle noticed that his face left a trail of a tear that ran down his face. "Hopefully we'll talk. Whenever she's ready… if that day ever comes."
"Harry, is there anything that we can -"
"There's nothing that you can do," Harry said in a final sort of way. "I need to handle this myself. Now please you two, I really appreciate the company and support, but I really want to be left alone right now." He turned around and walked up to a door-sized window and put his hands behind his back, not saying another word. Ron and Adelle, as quietly as they could, walked together and tried to get out of the room before Harry called them again.
"And tell no one to bother me," he said, not turning around.
"Right Harry," confirmed Ron as he closed the door behind him and left with Adelle to leave Harry in peace.