Author's Note: Whee! It has been, hmmm, what? A couple of months since I've last posted on Portkey with my fourth chapter.
I did swear that there would be no fourth chapter until the thrity-sixth review, and I stuck to my word! Yehey! I usually don't but anyway.
I decided to revise some parts of the fanfiction to straighten out some kinks so as to be consistent with the canon.
Anyway, I'd still be waiting for the 36th review! Until then, no fifth chapter! Hur-hur-hur…
Ahem. Back to business again. The song is Jann Arden's version of "You don't know me". And a big , big thank you for those who had previously reviewed.
Chapter 1
Beautiful.
It was the only word that Lily could think of for that day. It seemed that her heart had snagged at her throat and kept constricting it. She wanted to keep this day forever alive in her mind. She wanted the world to stop in its axis and let her sit and savor everything.
But this she couldn't do. People were waiting for her, watching her every step as she walked down the red-carpeted aisle that was strewn with exquisite white roses. She could hear the soprano's wonderful voice singing the 'Ave Maria.' Without glancing a clock, she could tell all was on time.
Somewhere near the altar stood James, wearing "proper" clothes for once -a somewhat old-fashioned tuxedo (it must be quite terrible for him to put up with these constricting muggle clothes) but without a bow tie. His warm coffee eyes caught her thoughtful gaze and cast openly an appreciative look on her. A flush of color rushed to her cheeks, hoping dearly that he did not think of her being so awfully dreamy.
With a deft swish, she stepped off the carpet, right beside him and smoothed whatever creases that there may be on her flimsy gown. With an expert's eye, she scanned if there were any speck of dirt that happened to hitch on the snow-white fabric while she was walking. There was none and that pleased her a lot. She wanted everything to be perfect.
'I thought that you could never be more lovely when you have on that little black dress you wore on the engagement party. I guess I was awfully wrong.' James murmured down to her ear and quirked his mouth into a half-smile. For some reason, her vocal cords were still tightly knotted so she could only smile back at the comment. Inch by inch, her palm was enveloped by a stronger and warmer hand. Only then had Lily realized that she was cold as ice and trembling badly.
A small frown etched above his characteristic large glasses. 'You're shaking.' He remarked and put her small hands between his and let the camellias dangle on her forearm, forgotten. He started rubbing them as if to let some of his warmth carry on to her.
The act soothed her nerves a bit and she managed to say 'Thank you.' She smiled at his thoughtfulness then took her time looking up at his face. A face that had become so dear to her that she had memorized every single inch of it.
'Your hair…' she commented at his stygian locks that was usually so unruly, sticking out in every angle. As if it wasn't enough, he messed it up with his hand every now and then, out of force of habit.
James raised his hand to mess it when he heard Lily's wondering tone but she quickly shook her head at him.
'Don't.' she said, and added a comment. 'It look nice on you. What did you do with it?'
'This?' he pointed at his surprisingly orderly hair and winced at recollection at the grueling hour he spent struggling with it and nearly scalping himself. 'You don't want to know.'
'I can tell.' She murmured knowingly at his expression and gave a little laugh. Tiptoeing, she caught several scents on him. 'That would be-James, did you use "Hair and There"?' she asked all of a sudden.
'That's what Sirius lent me. Why?' Was the confused answer.
Lily was so astounded that she could only cover her mouth to stop her from laughing aloud. 'But that's for dog grooming!' But before James could react, the organ changed its tune to the familiar bars of "Here Comes The Bride".
The whole congregation stood up to see the bride so Lily, being naturally petite, knew it would be futile to try to catch a glimpse so she looked at the groom instead. On the other side of the carpet opposite them, Frank Longbottom nervously fiddling with his own bow while never uprooting his eyes on the main attraction.
Then, after some grueling seconds, the bride reached them. Lily noticed that usually cheerful brunette was visibly robbed of her smile and shaking trembling badly. Putting a reassuring hand to her arm, she whispered 'This is it. It's all going to be all right, Alice.' She beamed at her teary-eyed best friend, sympathizing at the mutual state of nerves she observed from the couple.
Alice, on impulse, squeezed Lily into a tight bear-hug and murmured a quick word of thanks before facing the priest and her own soon-to-be husband.
James, after a while, noticed Lily shaking once more and realized that she was shedding her own tears too. 'Hey, what's wrong?' he nudged her gently and pointed at the flowers she held. 'You're drowning them.'
'It's just that… it would be the last time I hugged Alice as Alice Thatcher. The next time it would be Alice Longbottom.'
James glanced at the also weeping, round-faced brunette and squeezed Lily's hand gently. 'But she'd still be the good ol' Alice, won't she? So stop that and shush, the ceremony's starting.'
Lily saw the point but still, the small feeling of sadness lingered yet she did stop her sniffling and took her seat with the rest as the priest began the benediction.
He let out a sigh on seeing Lily less than cheerful than she ought to be. 'What are you so sad about? So what if Alice is a Longbottom. You still have me.'
Lily stopped for a while and gave him a wondering glance. For some reason, a lump grew in her throat. 'What do you mean?'
'What I meant is, if ever I do get married, I'd still be James Potter, right?' he replied, matter-of-factly.
This did the trick as a laugh surfaced and the priest shot her a discreet glare before she could stop herself. She playfully poked his ribs and replied, 'Silly dog.'
'Um, that would be Sirius who I swear I will hang by the neck when I can finally be free to move from here.' He muttered under his breath with a curse.
'Don't say that.' She hissed at him.
'Why?'
'This is a sacred place for muggles. Give them some respect they deserve.'
'But I do! I just said-' he cut his word short when he received the end of her icy glare. 'All right. But, really, do Frankie and Alice got to have their marriage in this muggle-whatchacallit? Um…oh, yeah-church?'
'Alice said they had to, don't you remember? Frank's new assignment in the ministry need him to be near muggles so naturally, they invited the muggles they know and then hold it in a muggle place. It's not so bad at all James, you've got to admit that. In fact,' she paused and wistfully viewed the graceful art and sense of sanctity of the church. 'It's very, very lovely.'
'If you say so.' He shrugged indifferently and looked in a different direction which Lily was quick to note and made her cheeriness altogether fade.
Given a chance, Lily would have desired to have a wedding so beautiful and perfect as Frank and Alice's, which was going on so far without a hitch. A big wedding in a grand cathedral with bells tolling and everything decked in flowers. Heaven knows how much such a normal, muggle-ish dream would cost to give it a try but, after all, it was only for once in a woman's lifetime.
Lily's eyes blurred at the feeling of having a dream so far to reach and wanted to wipe the tears when she realized that James was still tightly holding on to her hand which was carrying the handkerchief.
But most importantly, Lily wanted to marry a man whom she'd love forever and die for, if needed-Heaven forbid it wouldn't happen-and who will give her the same.
Suddenly, James felt Lily's hand twitch involuntarily and made him conscious of where his hand was and slowly withdrew his grip, hoping to go unnoticed but didn't.
She felt a rush of wretchedness and wanted to confront him at what he'd done. But she couldn't blame him, anyway, if he self-consciously withdrew his hand from hers. It was one of those signs that he didn't want a serious relationship with her other than a tightly-knit friendship. She wondered if ever he did feel anything at her besides anything platonic or brotherly towards her.
During the years at Hogwarts, you may say that there was a bit of attraction coming from James which she tried to dissuade as long as she could but then… something utterly unexpected just happened to her and slowly, she began to like him-James, when it came to the opposite sex, who was somewhere between being the arrogant God of All Pricks or the knight in shining armour every girl had drooled upon. Implying also that even if he wasn't a knight in shining armour, every girl in Hogwarts drooled for him since he, after all, was the great James Potter: star Quidditch player, old family named, notably well-off and ladies' man extraordinaire…
Well…every girl EXCEPT her, who only thought of him then as a pompous airhead with a hide of the legendary Grendel. A real macho-jackass with the rest of his companions-with exception to Remus, of course, a friend of hers before she even knew he hung out with the others.
Lily smiled at this recollection. James had come so far from being that Potter who he was then into now. He still was a ladies' man and the works but…never mind. All that she wanted to say was that, James had changed in some way or another and that she… she became fond of him, however impossible that might sound.
And yet, years after they have known each other, they were everything else except lovers.
It would not seem so to other persons because he took her out often or when his work time permitted him to ('Friendly dates and no anything intimate' Lily added quickly to herself), kissed her sometimes (but always on the forehead or cheek), hugged her (but often felt like it was detached) and other things. The fact was, James maintained it nothing more as friendship.
But there were times when Lily felt that there was more than that. Sometimes, when they were alone, he did things that Lily did not know if it was platonic or… or something more than that. Like that when she fell with a severe case of flu and he was the one who took care of her and when bade goodbye, embracing her tightly for sometime before kissing her two cheeks and nose. Or when he came from work dog-tired but remembered that he promised to watch a video at her flat but slept on its whole length-not that it mattered, but he made her into his pillow, hugging her and sleeping on her lap ( nearly salivating on her shirt but she managed to rouse him in time). It was so irritating, confusing, frustrating, this whole business.
But, truthfully, he was the nearest thing she could want for someone she wanted to spend all her years with until she's old and wrinkly as Dumbledore or more.
In a drowsy tone rivaling Prof. Binns', the priest droned at Alice, '…in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse?'
'I do.' Alice answered and smiled shakily at Frank.
Torn with a half-sinking, half-exalting feeling, she came to a full realization on what she felt for the young man who sat next to her.
But if James doesn't love her but another instead, she'll let him go. No matter how much it hurt her, just that he would be happy.
Lily wished hard, so hard everything in her hurt, that someday, somehow, someway, everything would turn out fine.
…
'Hey, Padfoot. Take a look at that. ' Remus nudged Sirius by his elbow, which irritated the other well and returned it with more force.
'I am already looking!.' He replied edgily. 'No need to elbow. '
For a while, both of them watched in a predatory manner over Lily and James who sat on the front row and whispering a small talk between them with smiles and looks shared only to the two of them.
'They're so sweet it makes me want to have someone like that.' Lupin noted wryly and let out a small rueful sigh.
'They're so sweet they're making me bloody sick.' Sirius drawled sardonically. 'Ugh…my spine shivers and every strand of hair I possess is standing on its roots. Can they take it somewhere else where nobody can see them? Ants are crawling all over me! They look more lovey-dovey than Frankie and Alice with that old man up there.'
By the other side of Remus, Peter interjected vehemently. 'Can't James notice what he's doing when he's with Lily? For once, Sirius, I do agree with you. It is a sickening sight.' Then he added, 'He even acts like he's monogamous.'
Remus defensively frowned when he heard Peter's note when referring to Lily. "Don't talk about Lily like that when I'm here.' He threw a scathing glance at him, who reluctantly muttered a small apology. 'Let them go. They deserve to be happy. And James became monogamous since he met her, if you've forgotten about that.'
Sirius wanted to smile when he noted the werewolf's seldom heard defensive talk, but then chose to ignore the last statements. 'Ughhh! To go through this hellish torture of seeing James and his lady love so utterly besotted with each other…What!' he raised his voice when he saw Remus' expression. There was a shushing sound behind them but paid no heed to.
Two eyebrows cocked skeptically over the piercing gray irises. Remus exclaimed in an all-knowing manner, 'If I know, Padfoot, you are a sentimental fool.'
'Look who's talking!' It was his turn to be defensive.
The shushing sound continued, more pronounced than the last time but was still ignored.
'…More than I am, even.'
'Am bloody not!' He bristled visibly at the accusation. 'All these years that I've seen, met and looked at people's minds, you are probably the sappiest person alive.'
The old muggle lady from behind them soundly knocked both of their heads with a knobby-handled umbrella, hissing at them to keep quiet.
Rubbing his head, Remus continued with a lowered voice. 'Hey, if you weren't, why did you give your place up as best man when you knew that Lily was chosen as the Maid of Honor?'
Sirius, who was grimacing from the blow, kept mum for a split second before haltingly replying. 'Because-um-they look like a better couple. I mean they were a couple before we even graduated and they are a couple and-'
'I may be only half-human, Padfoot but I'm half-animal too and I can sense denial when I feel it.'
'I don't need your psychic stuff Moony, thank you very much.' He puffed out and then looked forward at the pair. Moments later, to the surprise of Remus, he spoke up.
'You're right. It makes you bloody want to have a lady love. Why does James have and we don't?'
Remus only rolled his eyes upward, then continued to rub the still hurting spot on his head. Then he noticed the Sirius shuffling unusually in his seat. And before he had a moment to think about what he was up to, the other faked a loud sneeze. Simultaneously, he heard a noise behind him. Turning around, he saw the old woman falling from her seat, unconscious, and the people around her helping her up as discreetly as they could.
He faced Sirius, who shot him a conspiratorial wink and feigned to wipe his nose with a hanky.
'Bless you, Padfoot.' he meaningfully said.
'Thank you.'
Peter was sporting a look of disbelief. 'Did you do just that?' he shot at Sirius.
'How could you say that! I'm not even moving a finger!' he innocently defended himself then glared at a snickering Remus.
'You know what, Moony? I want to make a wager.' He began.
Remus caught a whiff of what he was thinking and said, 'Lily and James will get together anytime soon so there's no use for duping me into wasting a good ten galleons-'
'Which you owe me still.' The other pointed out.
'-for something that is obviously going to happen.' Remus finished with emphasis, so self-assured of his words.
'No!' Peter blurted out the word with such a disbelieving tone that it made other two turn around to him.
'There's your answer, Remus. Someone doesn't have the same point of view as we do so the wager is on and,' he produced a small black notebook from the pocket of his jacket and wrote Yes and No on top of a page. 'this will be the proof. Twenty galleons a bet. I sign here,' he wrote his name under the Yes column, 'And Remus, below me and Peter beside us.'
The werewolf turned ashen. 'Twenty galleons! Are you kidding me?'
'Trust me, Moony. You'd be rich before you know it.' Sirius assured him and winked once more.
…
He hand found her. He had seen her. And he knew the exact reasons why the Death eaters wanted the girl.
It was all Alfred Kennings could think about as he wound through the labyrinth of dark alleys that veined throughout Dublin. The rain was already seeping into his robes and he was cold, tired and weary of being chased without rest. Though he wanted to know how on earth did Voldemort's followers find out that he was there, he had no time to ponder. The main objective now is to get out of the city unscathed and intact and the files he retrieved tucked protectively inside his coat.
He needed to get out there safe, contact the other members of the order for back-ups and come back for the girl. She had so much power within her it was frightening to guess what would happen if the Dark Lord laid his hands on her.
Finally reaching the dead end of a street, he took a few deep breaths and looked at his watch. Good, he was a few minutes earlier than the agreed time. Within a few minutes, he'd be back in Hogwarts, report to Dumbledore, go home to his family, take a hot bath, eat a hot dinner and sleep.
Nervously, he looked at his watch again and saw that he only had two minutes more to wait. With a quick glance around him, he saw the object of his salvation: an old Christmas stocking (his, as a matter of fact, which is why he knew) that lay forlorn on top of a rubbish pile. He grabbed it with both of his hands and anxiously waited for the minutes to pass by.
One minute to go, thirty seconds, twenty ten…
But before he could count to one, a massive force from behind him met with the back of his skull with a resounding crunch, blacking out everything else that he was thinking. He was only dimly aware of a loud voice booming on top of his crouching figure, saying: 'Obliviate!', vaguely noticing that the stocking gave off a faint blue hue, pulled him in with a jolting sensation in the navel right after a beam of light hit him.
Then, nothingness.
…
'…And all the single women above the age of twelve line up here.' The emcee, the lively Dorcas Meadowes (a mutual friend of rank and Alice) enthusiastically called out and when some did not move, she pulled them up bodily and dragged them to the stage. 'And you're not excusing yourself, Professor Mcgonnagal!' she shot the stone-faced professor who suddenly looked like someone who had stepped on dog poo on a street just as when they're going to propose.
James shot Lily a nudging look but she cringed in horror instead.
'I am not going there!' she wailed at him but had not other choice since she was dragged halfway here. 'NOOO!!!' she was shouting all the way until they reached the stage. She usually wasn't this uncooperative when bouquet-tossing. Then why was she now?
He had to laugh at her pitiful state, saying all the time that she did not want to. For some reason, she dreaded bouquet tossing. But his blood froze in his arteries when Dorcas spoke again.
'Well, well, if it isn't Miss Evans! Rejoice!!! Is James Potter anywhere in this room? ' the voice boomed at the sound system and he found himself trying to escape to the shadows but the show light centered him and all the eyes zoomed straight at his direction. Now he knew why Lily looked so frightened.
'What do you all say if we just give the lovely couple the bouquet and garter?' she wickedly shouted and the room immediately filled with whistles and cheers.
Uncomfortable, he tried to excuse himself by saying: 'Isn't that too biased? Give the loveless ones a chance!'
Alice shrugged her shoulders at the emcee who looked like she wanted to strangle James. 'You are such a spoilsport. I was just calling out!' she pouted before explaining the familiar rules at the contestant, the more eager ones ready to jump any second. Lily however chose to remain at the back with Mcgonnagal who seemed as edgy as she was herself.
'May I remind that no one may inflict anything physical. There's a twist. Whoever catches the bouquet may choose anyone they like! Understood? Ok! Ready? On the count of three!' The voice rang and Alice stood in her proper place.
'One…' everyone seemed to be counting and found herself unable to breathe. What if someone enchanted the bouquet and made it fly at her? The others bent their knees and their feet inching slowly nearer and nearer to the bride.
'Two…' Maybe she should act as if she fainted or something as so to avoid the slipping of the garter, Lily thought frantically. By now, the muscles of the other women were highly tense, like a tightly coiled spring, ready to release the pent-up energy in them. The hands appeared like claws, itching to get the coveted bridal bouquet since they knew it would give them a chance to hit on the most eligible bachelors in the party, Potter and Black including. It seemed to Lily that the moments between the counts stretched into eternity.
'THREE!!!'
In a swift movement, Alice throws the flowers, a bit too powerful than she intended. The women sprang and jumped so high, claw-like arms viciously making a grab at anything, some unfortunately landed on the carefully made faces or hair of the others and in a split second almost everyone was fighting at each other. They forgot the gravity-defying flowers at the intense displeasure of their failure and of the ones who they think who clawed them. Lily saw the perfect white blooms looming closer and closer at her like an impending doom. She would be the one! She screamed inside and waited to let the flowers fall on the shyly opened hands.
And then the flowers brushed against her cheek and bounced of her shoulder…
…to Professor Mcgonnagal!!!
The room erupted into disbelieving cries and laughter. As for herself, the professor blushed like an adolescent and tried to give the bouquet to the emcee who kept saying that she had no other choice but to pick a partner.
The young men in unison backed away in fear and turned bluish in an instant they realized Mcgonnagal was going to pick a man. All they could think about was that Mcgonnagal seemed old and was sure he legs would appear somehow like prunes on a stick rather than the smooth, well-figured calves of any of the young ladies.
Realization came to Lily and somehow, the fact that she didn't get the bouquet when she was so near to catching it and missing the chance to pick the man of her choice, she felt a bit down but recovered when she caught up with the events.
As usual, the deputy headmistress with her infallible hawk-like eyes did not miss that reaction and gave a haughty and dignified sniff, on which Lily could only laugh.
Mcgonnagal saw Dumbledore smiling indulgently at the events and gave him a you-wouldn't-dare-not-do-this-for-me glare and rather forcefully handed him the elastic band of lace and satin.
To the surprise of everyone, when Mcgonnagal's skirt was hiked, she possessed still smooth and well-toned legs that made all of them gasp. Chuckling to himself, the headmaster slid with ease the garter and pulled the skirt down.
An explosion of wild cheers filled the air before the room rang with the sound of forks hitting the crystal glasses demanding for a kiss.
'Who?' the emcee asked. Some shouted for the groom and bride while the rest, and more vociferously, demanded the kiss held for Dumbledore and Mcgonnagal. At this, Dumbledore only smiled more, his blue eyes twinkling in laughter and gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek, but both of them nevertheless had splotches of red in the face afterwards.
Quite some time later, the commotion had died down and the tables gave way to a wide dance floor. The pianist twiddled with the keys a bit, as well as the other band members who were tuning their own instruments. The microphone echoed loudly for a second before the vocalist tapped it for a sound.
Lily surveyed the people moving about and a few couples poised on the dance floor, sipping her champagne quietly. To be truthful, she felt a bit light-headed and couldn't remember clearly whether or not she had eaten anything that day in the excitement of the events.
'You're getting yourself drunk, Lily.'
She whirled and looked at James at the eye. 'Am not. I was just thirsty and the men at the buffet table gave me this thing.'
He crouched before her and stroked her face gently that she gave up stopping her tears. 'I feel so wretched, James…'
'About Alice again?'
'No! About…' she stopped her tongue with all her remaining mental strength. '…I don't know. About everything I guess. And nothing. And something.' She babbled nonsensically and laughed at her own silliness.
'When was the last time you ate?' he concernedly pried.
'Lunch, of course.' But she saw his disbelieving glare and gave out. 'All right. Breakfast.'
'And what did you eat?' his tone was now more strong.
'This and that…' she trailed off, afraid to see him angry if he realized that she only took in tea and a few biscuits.
'Then you're drowning yourself in champagne.'
He just stared at her for sometime, trying to be angry for her sake and wanting to lecture her for not eating at the right time. But he found himself not thinking properly, just staring at her eyes which seemed to him greener and greener every moment and made enormous because of the tears. For a moment, he though he would drown in their depths. Behind him, he could hear the vocalist muttering, 'One, two, three…' At the corner of his eye, he saw Sirius and Remus waving madly at a Peter and a crowd gathering around them and shouting something at the first two. But, what the heck! He didn't care what were they up to this time. What mattered now was the girl he was kneeling in front of.
The band strummed into a tune and then he quipped. 'You know what?'
'What?'
'I know something that will cheer you up.' He said, and striding back, he offered a hand to her. 'May I have the honour to dance with this beautiful lady?'
'You give your hand to me…'
'Oh, shut up, James. I'm not that.' She mock-frowned but smiled brightly as she held the outstretched hand and pulled herself up, leaving the champagne glass on the chair.
'and then you say hello…'
'Oh, yes you are!' He indignantly retorted and pulled her close. 'It's a certified fact, general truth and I'm a big, fat liar.' He ended with a laugh which earned him another poke in the rib. 'If I remember rightly, the last time we danced is at the Graduation Ball. The first and the last time. But what I can recall correctly is that I stepped at your toes for a total of seventeen times.'
'And I can hardly speak…'
She felt the comforting rumble on his chest as he laughed and let herself laugh too. But she did not have much time to laugh as James put his face near hers, their foreheads and noses touching. 'Honestly, I'm bothered, thinking that you might not want to dance with me again since that night.'
'…my heart is beating so.'
She managed to whisper, albeit breathlessly, 'It's my favorite song…'
The pad of his thumb touched her bottom lip and silencing her effectively. 'I know. It's mine too…'
'And anyone could tell,…'
'you think you know me well…'
'But you don't know me… hmmm…'
They were so close she could feel his breath rushing down on her and felt his pulse race, meaning that he was feeling the same rush as she was.
'No, you don't know the one…'
'who dreams of you at night…'
She could only shut her eyes and feel.
'And longs to kiss your lips and longs to hold you tight…'
But she needed to know!
'Oh, I'm just a friend, and that's all I've ever been…'
'But James, I have to talk to you…'
James opened his hazel eyes that aligned with her own emerald ones.
'Do you love me, James?'
'Coz' you don't know me…'
The warmth of Lily's skin made him abandon all his care and pressed nearer to her. Damn the Order. Damn anyone who was tailing him even to that moment. Damn whatever Moody said about keeping his feeling at bay. Damn at whoever was staring at them. All he cared about was Lily, her scent, the smoothness of her skin, her warm breathing, her softness and the unconscious act of sharing all that he had that moment with her.
'I never knew the art of making love…'
'Though my heart aches with love for you…'
Lily had no idea how much he wanted to be like this, hold her like this for so long and always.
'Afraid and shy I let my chance go by…'
Lily had no idea how much he loved her.
But there was no other choice. It was because of this reason he was pretending when all he wanted to be is to be for real with Lily.
'Lily…I…let's not talk about this tonight, alright?' he softly whispered to her, his tone almost pleading, hoping so much she would understand.
'The chance that you might love me too…'
Lily faltered in her steps the moment the words reached her ears, her heart making a gut-wrenching and grinding halt.
'You give your hand to me…'
So that was just it. Let's not talk about it. How cruel his words were. When she asks him, that was his reply.
'and then you say good-bye…'
All right. Fine. As if she did care about it. After all, she was just the helplessly unimportant servant-girl at some fairy tale who happened to fall hard for the knight in shining armour that wasn't just for her.
James was not for her.
'I watch you walk away beside the lucky guy…'
Lily knew she shouldn't give a damn, but she did. A lot. And it was sadistically squeezing her chest. The next thing she knew, she couldn't so much as breath.
Mumbling an excuse she herself couldn't make something out, she tore herself from him and weakly wobbled away from him. Then, gaining speed, she ran out into the night forgetting where she was and what occasion was it although she could hardly see anything even those in front of her.
'Oh, you won't know the one…'
A yellow cab stopped in front of her, quite mistaking that she wanted a ride. But when Lily heard steps behind her, she made a decision.
'…the one who loves you so…'
She quickly shoved herself inside the cramped space of the vehicle and gave some directions. Hardly even finished, the cabbie shot down the road. By his side mirror, he could see the faint silhouette of a bespectacled man who came for the lady in his cab too late.
' Coz' you don't know me…'
The lone yellow taxi went off, with Lily inside of it. Another cab, seeing him, greedily placed itself in front of him and opened an inviting door that, he knew, would take him to her. He could catch up really fast and well, there wasn't any problem about that. But he couldn't. He shouldn't.
'Oh no, you don't know me…'
He wanted to stop the knives stabbing his heart and stomach. The veins were straining so hard to go to Lily. He yearned desperately to be beside her again, nd hold her within his arms.
But James spoke to the waiting cabbie, 'I'm sorry but thank you. I don't need one.' His voice grated and seared at the constricted lump in his throat, as well as his now watery hazel eyes.
He had to let go of Lily. He must! It was the right choice.
'You don't know me.'
But why was he hurting like Hell?
An appreciative round of applause once more filled the reception hall and the vocalist smugly said her thank you's before moving on to another song but also a love song.
James couldn't stand it anymore. So he started walking away on his own into the dark and cold street.
Above him, the first snowflakes of that year had started to fall.