Hermione stood in the dark Common Room at Hogwarts, tears racing down her face and shivering from some unknown coldness. She wrapped her arms firmly around herself, trying to calm her beating heart and trying to tell herself that everything would be okay.
But the slamming sound of the portrait door shutting broke her from those thoughts and panic filled her brain. Hermione raised her blurry eyes toward the entrance, the silence beginning to pound in her ears.
How could she let him leave like that? How could she let him walk out on her without her ever telling him the truth? How could she let him go with the knowledge that she might never see him again and so many unspoken words between them? How could she not tell him, once and for all, that she loved him?
"No," Hermione whispered suddenly, "No, I can't let him go. He has to know."
Hermione bolted for the portrait door and shoved it open, only one goal set in her mind. To get to Harry.
"Hermione!" Ron shouted, breaking from his own trance long enough to call after her. "Hermione, don't! It will only make things worse!"
But Hermione wouldn't hear his pleas. Her heart and mind were set and now she wouldn't turn back. She had to tell Harry that she loved him. Now. Or she would regret it forever. She had waited two long, painful years for this moment to come and now, just as it was about to slip out of her hands, she was making one last attempt to grasp on to it.
Hermione raced blindly down the unending corridors, searching desperately for Harry and hoping he hadn't left completely already. She burst out of the castle, throwing the heavy doors open, and started running across the damp grass, heading toward the lake. The moonlight shined brightly down on her and Hermione frantically scanned her eyes all over the grounds.
Finally, she caught sight of him, walking slowly toward the Forbidden Forest, his head bowed as if under a great weight. Her heart stopped for a second at the sight of him and she quickly forced herself to call out to him.
"Harry!" she yelled hoarsely, fear filling her.
Harry swung around in surprise and his eyes widened in shock when he saw Hermione frantically running at him, tears falling down her face. The ache in his heart grew at the sight of her. He hated putting her through this pain, just leaving her without so much as a hint of his feelings for her. But he had to, he might not survive this final battle with Voldemort, and he didn't want to just leave Hermione after confessing to something as big as love.
Now she was running after him, probably trying to get him to not leave, and he couldn't let her do that. This hurt him so much but he was going to have to push her away, for now.
"Hermione, go back, don't come after me. Make this easier on me and leave now." Harry backed away from her, stepping closer to the foreboding trees.
Hermione stopped a few feet in front of him and stretched a trembling hand toward him.
"Don't go, Harry. Please, don't go," she whispered.
Harry shook his head and closed his eyes. "I have to, Hermione. Please understand that. I have to. Don't try to stop me because you won't. This is my destiny, I have to fight Voldemort. Please Hermione, go back."
Hermione started shaking and fell slowly to her knees, not able to stand any longer. She buried her face in her hands, the tears coming even faster and choking sobs escaping her lips. It was now or never, it was time to confess everything.
"Not yet," she said softly, but loud enough for Harry to hear her, "you can't go yet, not before I tell you the truth. Not before I tell you what I've kept hidden for so long. Not before I tell you…..I tell you that I love you."
Harry froze at her final words and let the realization sink in slowly. Had he heard that right? Had Hermione just said that she loved him? Loved him? No, he must have misheard, Hermione could never, would never, love him. It wasn't possible. It had always been a dream to him that she would return his unspoken feelings for her. And now when it finally became reality, he knew he could never allow it to happen. He knew he couldn't let Hermione love him, especially now.
"No, Hermione," he said quietly, "you don't love me. Don't say that, you can't love me. I might never return, I can't give you that kind of love back. Go, live your life and forget about me. Stop loving me. Don't love someone who is marked for death. Give your heart to a more worthy person."
With tears in his own eyes, Harry turned his back on Hermione and started walking away, feeling his heart breaking into a million pieces and being left at the feet of the sobbing girl who held it so tightly.
Hermione felt a flash of anger at Harry's words and when she looked up and saw him leaving, she jumped up, blind rage filling her.
"Harry James Potter, you are a complete arse! Don't tell me who to love and who not to love. Don't tell me any of that. I love you and nothing will ever change that. I've loved you for so long I can barely remember when it started. But what I do know is that I love you and I will never stop loving you."
Hermione collapsed to the ground once more and breathed out the last words. "I can't not love you."
Harry hunched forward and shut his eyes tightly, trying to breathe. He couldn't do this, he just couldn't. He willed himself to keep his back turned. He tried to block out the sound of Hermione's tears. He tried to forget the pain he was causing both of them by his ignorance of the truth. But the pain was becoming unbearable.
"Why me?" he managed to say.
"Why?" Hermione repeated quietly. "Because you're the only one I've ever wanted. Because you're the one who stole my heart so many years ago. Because you're the only one who's ever made me feel safe and made me feel truly happy. Because you are you. Because you look beyond everything about me on the surface and see me for me. Because, Harry, you're my only one, the one I love."
Harry felt a tear run down his face at her words, never knowing someone could love him like that. He never thought those feelings would be returned but here they were, being handed to him. Suddenly Harry knew he couldn't deny it any longer. No matter what happened, he could no longer resist the strong feelings in his heart. He could no longer hold back his love for Hermione. He had hid it for two years and it was now time to speak the truth.
Harry slowly turned back around and took a few uncertain steps toward Hermione's crumbled form. The words wouldn't form though and Harry merely watched her as he kept approaching. Hermione was refusing to look at him and was staring blankly toward the direction of the lake. He knelt carefully in front of her and slowly stretched out his hand and placed it gently on her cheek.
Hermione flinched but allowed him to turn her head to face him. Brown eyes met with green ones, both filled with tears. Hermione felt her skin tingling at his touch and a blush forming under his intense gaze. Harry cupped her cheek and smiled softly at her.
"Oh, Hermione, you don't know how long I've waited to hear you say those words."
Hermione looked at him in confusion. "Ha…Harry….what? What do you mean?"
Harry chuckled lightly and leaned a bit closer to her, so their noses were almost brushing. Hermione gasped at the sudden closeness and closed her eyes briefly. Her heart was racing and she almost couldn't believe this was happening.
"You're my only one too, Hermione," he whispered, "I've always loved you."
Fresh tears sprang into Hermione's eyes at his words and silently ran down her face. Harry gently brushed them away with his thumb.
"Please don't cry, Hermione, I hate seeing you cry."
Hermione shook her head firmly. "No, its just….I never expected you to love me in return."
"How could I not love you?" he said seriously.
Hermione laughed lightly and threw her arms around Harry's neck, crying on his shoulder through her joy of finally being able to really love the man she had secretly loved for so many long years. He hugged her back just as fiercely, burying his face in her long hair and breathing in her scent.
"I love you, Harry, I love you," she kept whispering over and over again.
Harry rubbed her back soothingly, trying to calm her down, and knowing the whole time he would have to leave soon. He would have to leave the only person who he loved with his entire heart, the one that was his soul mate and was the reason he lived. Yes, she was the reason he lived, and she was the reason he would fight to keep living.
The power Voldemort knows not, maybe this is it, Harry thought. It's love.
Harry pulled away from her and grabbed Hermione's face between his hands and lightly stroked her cheek with his finger.
"You know I have to go," he said, "but know now that I love you and I always will love you, no matter what happens. I will always be in your heart and I will carry you in mine through it all. You're never leaving me. I love you, Hermione Granger."
Harry then leaned forward and gently pressed his lips to hers; their first kiss. It was a sweet and innocent kiss that held nothing but love behind it and Harry's heart swelled. He now knew what love was.
They broke apart and Hermione smiled at him through her tears. He placed a kiss on her forehead and slowly stood up, his fingers intertwining with hers. Hermione stood up as well and hugged him again, never wanting to let him go, knowing that this might just be the last time she ever saw him.
Harry then slowly begin to back away, his hand never leaving hers. Hermione bit her lip in an effort to stop more sobs from escaping her. Their eyes remained locked the entire time, trying to share between them every ounce of feelings that boiled beneath the surface. Secret signs of love passed between them until they finally had to let go of each other and their hands dropped.
Hermione shivered at the loss of Harry's warmth and felt her heart breaking with each step he took away from her. So this is what it felt like, to have your heart broken and watch the one person who meant everything to you walk away with the knowledge of maybe never seeing them again.
Just as Harry started to turn back to the forest, Hermione called out after him.
"Come back to me, Harry!" she cried.
He stopped briefly. "I will," he said quietly.
And then he was gone, disappearing into the black depth of the swaying trees, and taking Hermione's heart with him. Hermione crumpled to the ground and cried until she could cry no more.
She never thought love would hurt so much.
.........................
Author's Note: Finally, got another chapter up to this story! I know I said it was only going
to be a 3 chapter story, but as you can see, that's obviously not how it worked out. I probably have only one
chapter left and then its done. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter, a bit shorter than my last one but longer than
the first. I appreciate every single review I have received, you guys are the best and thank you for following this
little story of mine! :) I'll try and get the next chapter up asap. Also, I'm working on chapter 22 of Heirs so
I'll hopefully have that up within the week, hopefully!
Thank you again for reading this and I hope you like how I put Harry and Hermione together! Please review, I'd
appreciate it!
Lots of love,
PhoenixFirebolt